Memes? Moods? idk

All pronouns 🏳️‍🌈 I've been called a walking shitpost by my friend and coworker, so... here are some of My Thoughts™ (and other shit)

[officialchaotic]

I specifically made sure that everything in my room was open storage or see through cause if i donn't see it: it's gone. Now im trying to find how to hide things that i don't need for a while...

[officialchaotic]

Why doesn't Netflix have a "rip my heart out and tear it up" category huh? Do I have to find the "cried myself to sleep" shows and movies myself? Where are the "i give up on life" movies??

Im sad and want more to concentrate on than my shitty thoughts and devastating music!

[officialchaotic]

I was worried my roommate would get tired of me eventually and be annoyed by me like my family.

But then she hands me a cookbook and sticky notes and asks me to go through it, mark what I like and stuff I want to change so she knows when she looks through -instead of complaining about how picky I am and how hard this makes picking dinner.

And carefully points out when I'm making something harder for myself and explains how to make it easier -instead of watching and teasing me later about it.

And communicates kindly but firmly when I make something hard for her -instead of yelling or just telling me stop.

And actually tries to remember what foods make me randomly sick -instead saying that I'm just making up an excuse to not eat a food I don't like and complaining that it's a new thing.

And I realize she loves me and tries to accommodate for me in ways my family tried half heartedly (if at all), and I think we just might be ok

[officialchaotic]

Had the most sureal experience with Spotify just now:

*silence~*

is my volume that low? does this song just have a long intro?

*~*

"Thanks for listening to ad, now enjoy 30 minutes of ad free music"

[officialchaotic]

It's nice have a gamer (that has a good bedtime) as my roommate, cause for most times that we're both in the dorm i can hear her keyboard clicking as she plays and it reminds me of brother playing back when everything was simple and we didn't hate our parents yet.

[officialchaotic]

You'd think the guilt of procrastinating, and not having your homework would be enough to make me work, but no, no it's not:(

[officialchaotic]

Does it suck when your family doesn't accept you and basically erases the fact that you came out? ...yes.

But does causing the uncomfortable, knowing silence that happens whenever being trans is mentioned make it worth it? ... no, but it does make me happy:D

[officialchaotic]

Im crashing into the pit of despair... So time to start Isolating!!

[officialchaotic]

Is it not normal to want nightmares?

Everytime I explain to anyone that I would try acid because it's a win-win high, (either euphoria or your literal worst nightmares) they're confused? Like, they either think I'm joking, or they're confused, or they think I'm confused like I don't know what a nightmare is.

I Know what a nightmare is. I had sooo many as a kid, I want to have one again. I want to know what my brain would come up with. I want to be scared.

[officialchaotic]

My mom just told my family that she has the start of covid pneumonia and because i have no medical knowledge and pneumonia a big word, i don't know anything about it. so my first thought was "omg, will she be ok?? haha, looks like i might not die before my parents after all."

[officialchaotic]

Wanna know what is destined to always bring me out of a depressive episode? a good cheesy hash brown.

If my significant other knows how to make some... marriage. and im not even too keen on marriage!

human knowledge peaked when someone put cheese with cut potatoes rectangles

[officialchaotic]

got called a menace because i don't understand what's microwavable safe✌ (and i started a teensy fire)

[officialchaotic]

Fun activity I'm trying: I have multiple mental breakdowns in a day till I see at what point I run out of tears because a bitch doesn't drink enough water!

[officialchaotic]

Was talking to myself (as one does), and I called myself a girl, then boy, then paused.. and called myself a motherfucker....

New way to address your nonbinary friends! Call them a motherfucker!

[officialchaotic]

currently crying in my closet ✌️😙

[officialchaotic]

You know the phrase "well I can't be (blank) I'm (blank)!" or specifically "well I can't be transphobic, I'm gay!"

I took that literally.

As much as I hate admitting it.. I used to be conservative and transphobic. What really made me stop agreeing with that was realizing I like girls.

Upon finding that out, I started to learn more about the LGBTQ+ community. And (again) I'll admit it took me a year-ish to stop being transphobic, but I kept trying to change my mindset because "I can't be transphobic, I'm gay!"

TLDR: I took the phrase "well I can't be transphobic, I'm gay!" as: I need to stop being transphobic if I want to proudly be a part of this community; I have to be accepting of the whole community.

[officialchaotic]

I had to pee, but, as I did that little dance as to not pee my pants, I complained to myself proclaiming that "I've already peed today!😡"

I then remembered that, healthy people, do it multiple times a day. While we're at it, they also don't get angry about it.