ｖｅｒｔｉｇｏ

on a scale from one to zero, are you happy?

[ofshilch-blog]

unsccnangcl‌:

location: humanities building atrium 

date: four nineteen pm, december twentieth

with: shiloh ( @ofshilch )

when everything was going to shit, there was always one thing that made ella feel better: writing. whenever she felt like all she wanted to do was scream and cuss, all she needed to do was write, was bleed onto the sheet, and she always felt better. to see all of her thoughts staring back at her on the page, out of the unmanageable jumble that was her brain, made her feel more… in control. but sometimes… sometimes everything happening in her brain was too much. sometimes ella looked at the blank page and all she could think to fill it with was fuck fuck fuck fucK FUCK FUCK - . sometimes it was impossible to make her misery poetic. 

alone in the atrium, she shut her laptop, feeling her fingers start to shake. how could she put all of this… uncertainty, this fear into words? ella leaned her head against the back of the couch, looking up for the first time in an hour, to see shiloh also in the room. she sat herself up properly, sliding her laptop onto the couch next to her. “hey, uh… i haven’t, i haven’t seen you since finals started. how are you? i mean…” ella shuts her eyes, trying to sort out her brain enough to speak. “bad question, but… just, yeah. i hope you’re… you’re okay.” when written words were hard, spoken words were nearly impossible. 

shiloh had needed to get out of her room for a bit, having been cooped up there for the entire day. it was hard to find something to do when there wasn’t anything to do. she had been wandering aimlessly through the school, marveling at the quiet, when she had stumbled on ella huddled in front of her laptop. “hi,” she greeted, a soft smile playing on her lips. she always liked seeing the other girl. ella morris was so different from her, but in the most positive way. her gentle disposition always brought up a side of shiloh’s personality that she liked to experience – a kinder, more attentive side. “sorry – i didn’t mean to startle you. you seemed very focused on whatever you were doing, i didn’t want to be a bother.”

she sat down on the couch next to ella, sliding the laptop so it now rested between the two of them. “thanks for helping me with those pesky finals, by the way. i aced that research methodology exam you helped me with. i didn’t do so well in western art, but hey – you win some, you lose some.” she knew she was avoiding the real question; she knew that ella wasn’t simply asking about her academic success. she also knew her feelings about melanie were very different from ella’s, so she decided on the most neutral answer she could think of. “i’m – i’m holding up. how are you?” while tiptoeing around a subject wasn’t something she was particularly good at, she cared enough about the other girl to at least give it a shot. besides, ella had always seemed a bit… fragile to the other girl. she was sure melanie’s disappearance was putting enough strain on her without shiloh running her mouth.

[ofshilch-blog]

plcttwist‌:

once upon a time, it had been easy pretending to be clueless, to act as if she didn’t realize how much her actions affected the people around her. the people that once cared about her. but like everything in her life, things only got more complicated as the years went by. and now just wasn’t sure if the consequences of her actions were worth it. she understood very well why people hated her, why they talked shit about her behind her back everyday. why she had so many foes around covington. it was taking more energy than she had in her small frame to ignore the fact that she was a monster and everyone knew it. sometimes, she thought she should just embrace it, it would be easier. but donatella was never known for her brains, so while that would have been the preferred course of action, she just kept pushing. even if she knew that, one day, she would just explode and do some kind of stupid shit she would regret a few seconds later.

it was surreal watching the change in shiloh’s countenance, it almost looked like she was preparing for battle. and maybe she was, maybe she was about to behead the feared dragon and finally bring peace to the people of hemlock. and even if she knew that it was necessary, she wouldn’t take it lying down. ❝ ah, of course. my first thought as i went through the worst months of my life was to get my phone and sent you a motherfucking text message. ❞ she couldn’t help the bitter reply that escaped her lips. ❝ i don’t know if you remember, but i reached out after a while and you decided you were above me. so please don’t give me that sob story because this one is on you. ❞

shiloh took a deep breath, forcing herself to remain calm. ( absent-mindedly, she wondered if their pictures were done yet. she also wondered if any of the other stranded students were planning on developing their own photographs today. if someone should walk in on them, the situation would look quite bizarre – two girls yelling at each other in the dark over childhood slights. ) as much as the advice to count to ten had become a cliché, it was something that occasionally worked for shiloh. one, two, three…

she knew donnie tended to lash out when she was hurt, and that taking her words to heart was pointless. most of the time, shiloh was the exact opposite – when she got hurt, she made herself small, choosing silence over confrontation. growing up with a fight with her parents constantly a hair’s breadth away, she had learned to hold her breath long enough for the waves to wash over her, rather than to drown in her own anger and hurt. it was why, instead of responding to the accusation donnie flung her way, she could zero in on the words that didn’t make any sense to her. …eight, nine, ten. ❝ worst months of your life ? what are you talking about ? you told me you were visiting a family member in la. ❞

[ofshilch-blog]

paintingpeyton‌:

    it was too hard to even think what this was doing to her moms - having she and cordy both stuck on campus, especially with how closely involved melanie had been in their lives for so long. she felt anxious, restless… shiloh was one of the only people who had managed to put peyton at ease, feeling better about the situation and less paranoid at every second. maybe it’s because they had so much in common, a fact that was revealed more and more slowly as the spent time together. it felt fitting that the two had similar coping mechanisms and reactions to this most recent source of stress. being alone right now was something pey both craved and feared. 

 scared it’s gonna be me. why did peyton feel the exact same way? she figured it was mostly due to her very vicarious bout of underage drinking. or maybe - well, there were nasty words said both at the party and beforehand, when it came to melanie. peyton grimaced, hiding it with a deep swig from the bottle, gagging as she swollen. “same. and like, you don’t know what others have been saying, you know?” peyton sighed. this had gotten dark, and she felt a little bad. she hadn’t meant to let it get this somber. it was just hard to ignore. fortunately, shiloh’s theory was exactly what the pair needed, and peyton giggled. “fuck, you are so right! i seriously wouldn’t put it past her. i always thought she had more adoring fans than enemies but… it really looks the opposite now, huh?” it was a pretty bad time to be on this end of the melanie anti-fanclub. though, it was nice to know they weren’t alone in their dislike, despite the way it incriminated them. “what did you even say when they asked about her? like, how do you even answer that anyway.”

    “right? like, i was kinda drunk that night – not wasted or anything like that, but what if i did or said something weird or incriminating and i just can’t remember? i’ve seen too many documentaries about the crooked legal system not to worry that they’ll try to pin this on one of us somehow.” despite the cynical nature of her words, they were also hopeful – she didn’t think any of them actually had it in them to do anything to harm another human being, even a human being as hopelessly annoying as melanie rivera. still, a gnawing feeling told her that a person could never really know another person. she pushed the thought aside, deciding it was better left for another day. for now, she wanted to form a cohesive unit with the others as much as possible.

    she smiled wryly at peyton’s words, thinking about the moments she spotted melanie walking through the school’s hallways. it was always with a strange mixture of envy, pity and anger. she did always seem like covington’s bright shining star, like nothing could touch her. with the madness of the current investigation, shiloh did not dare to say it aloud, but it was a little bit gratifying to watch that veneer disappear. “i just told them the truth, man. well, most of it anyway. i figured it would be worse if they caught me in a lie than if i admitted we weren’t the best of pals. i mean, shit, i dislike a lot of people. doesn’t mean i would... do anything to them.” the word ‘murder’ was something she couldn’t bear to say. it would make all of this feel too real. besides, it was just morbid gossip anyway. the police hadn’t confirmed anything... yet. they would tell them if something had come up, wouldn’t they?

[ofshilch-blog]

dcnatellas‌:

it was almost comic how shiloh didn’t just keep her distance emotionally, she kept it physically too. donatella almost felt like a wild animal, hunting their prey. ready to attack and take everything she needed, leaving the poor animal there, defenseless. maybe it was a metaphor for her life, how she only took, and took, until everyone else was bleeding on the ground. but actually seeing the consequences were harrowing, she’d end up alone and it would all be her own fault.

she remembered how shiloh used to look up to her when they were both in high school, but time had passed. she wasn’t the same person she was back then and she could see that - everyone could see that, but it seemed that the girl­ in front of her had no qualms in letting her know that everything had changed right along with her.

❝ i’m not pretending anything. i always liked talking to you while we developed pictures, didn’t know it was a crime to still do it. ❞ her brows furrowed in confusion, where did that come from ? she knew that they weren’t friends anymore, but it wasn’t like there was a big fight. they just drifted apart. or pushed themselves apart. after a beat, she remembered the last part of shiloh’s sentence and felt even more confused. was she really that bad that people thought she didn’t want them around ? that she thought she had any say in anything they did ?  ❝ and why the fuck would i wish you hadn’t enrolled in the first place ? i wasn’t aware there was so much contempt between us. ❞

it was a lie, of course. she had noticed that shiloh turned back everytime she saw her all to avoid acknowledging her. and while that hurt, she never really had a reason to reach out to ask why exactly she went out of her way to evade her.  ❝ if talking to me is that much of an inconvenience, i’ll stay silent. don’t worry about it. ❞ she said after a while, her tone was obviously bitter. she didn’t have the energy to mask her feelings right now. she’d be back at it tomorrow, but right now she’d just let herself feel for a change.

shiloh had never been one for facing things head-on. she was outspoken, sure – but if there was a way for her to get out of a tough conversation, she would always take it. it was easier to pretend that the hurt wasn’t there than to go through the arduous process of stitching up wounds. easier to simply cut off friendships then to talk out problems. it was why she had left hemlock without so much as a word said to many of the people she knew. she had told donnie that it was fine to go back to ignoring her existence out of the idea that it would make things easier, give them both a way out of the awkward small talk. instead, it seemed that she had only managed to erupt the volcano that was donatella navarro.

however, now that the dam had broken, she found herself unwilling to back down. her friendship with donnie ( or lack thereof ) had always been one big question mark in her life, and she wanted to find out where they stood once and for all. she dug her nails into the soft flesh of her palms, bracing herself for impact as she spit out the words that had been on her mind for so long. ❝ you weren’t aware there was contempt between us ? really, donnie ? i came back from my summer break and you were acting as if we barely knew each other. what the fuck was i supposed to think ? you were one of the few people i cared about in that shithole. i thought – ❞ her voice stuttered, quivered, gave out. i thought i somehow messed everything up. i thought you found friends you liked better and ditched me. she took a deep breath, hoped the other didn’t notice how deeply this still cut her. ❝ i just thought you felt the same way, is all. ❞

[beverlie-deactivated20221005]

📍–– the lazarus conservatory

✨ –– shiloh jeong ( @ofshilch​ )

it was hard for austin to sit still without feeling like their every muscle was being restrained against their will. they were dramatic, sure, but they tried their hardest to not make a big deal out of the limitations they had just been given. make the most out of what little you have, they tried to remind their self as frequently as possible, and so they did. or at least, attempted to. without anywhere to drive to, they’d decided their usual adventure partner/driver, wolfie, was fairly useless right about now, and went for a more interesting option. shiloh was someone who austin projected a lot of their restlessness onto, for sure. they were certain that she felt the same, even if she tried her best to not give into her wild side. austin did their part in indulging that side of her (along with a few extra (; things). today, they’d spent most of their time in the conservatory, jokingly threatening to eat, well, an alarming amount of poisonous plants. they’d arranged their backpack and jacket nicely on the floor, making for a nice spot to lay back and just relax, if they were even capable of it “any plans for the holidays now that it’s just us and the entire cast of pretty little liars?”

[ofshilch-blog]

shiloh was generally of the opinion that limiting her interactions with austin braxton was for the best. in the past few days however, she had binge watched too many shows to count, tried all the menu items at bean me up and she had even tried reading for pleasure. in other words, she was hopelessly bored. while she knew it was somewhat self-destructive, she had finally let herself be drawn in by the pull austin had on her, accompanying them to the conservatory. currently, she was standing in front of a plant with colourful flowers that she had to resist the urge to touch. she didn’t want to start off her holidays with painful blisters on her fingers. (and god, if that wasn’t an apt metaphor.) “hm? i dunno. no idea how long they’re planning on keeping us here. main items on my to do list are roasting marshmallows, making snow angels, not getting into trouble, that sort of thing.” it was an inside joke of sorts – it was usually austin that was getting her in trouble in the first place. however, it wasn’t entirely fair to describe shiloh as an innocent bystander getting dragged into illicit escapades. she played just as much of an active role; austin just made for a convenient scapegoat once regret or guilt started gnawing at her. still, she never felt guilty enough to put an end to whatever the two had. “dibs on the one that was fucking her teacher, by the way.“ it was the one plotline she could remember from the show austin mentioned. it had served as background noise for much of her teen years – her sister used to be obsessed with the show. for shiloh’s part, it reminded her too much of the hemlock she grew up in: beautiful shallow people too obsessed with appearances to talk about anything even remotely meaningful.

[ofshilch-blog]

ofconstellctions‌:

“so, how strict of a no leaving campus lockdown do you think we’re really on? like, do you think they have cops stationed at every exit?” it’s clear that there’s SUPPOSED to be an air of light-heartedness to cordelia’s words, but the hint of a nervous tremor to her words does little to aid in the delivery of it. as much as the quiet edge of panic has been creeping its way up her spine for the last few days, she remains unable to control it in any way. “usually i wouldn’t be opposed to having to take an extended leave of absence from work, but like… with the yule log lighting coming up, i’m genuinely afraid that susan will come hunt us down & drag us in by our ears,” she explains, rolling onto her stomach & casting a knowing look in shiloh’s direction. she KNOWS that the girl will understand — aside from the regular field trips from the local elementary school, the yule log lighting is one of the few times a year there’s any real traffic in the history museum & the preparation that goes into it is no joke. they do so many run-throughs leading up to the celebration that she’s pretty confident that the entirety of the history of the hemlock yule log guided tour will be burned into her memory FOREVER. “do we have to be the ones to call them? i feel like the police should do that for us, it’s their choice to detain all of us. susan can take up her issues with THEM instead of us.”

shiloh is leaned up against cordelia’s headboard, painting her toe nails a pretty blue color that her mother would never approve of. there is a visible shudder that runs through her at the sound of her supervisor’s name, and she briefly puts the brush back into the bottle to take a pillow from cordelia’s bed and half-heartedly FLING it at the other girl’s head. she misses by about three feet, of course. hand-eye coordination has never been her strong suit. “god, stop! you’ll give me nightmares. that woman terrifies me. did i tell you about the time i came in two minutes late – two minutes – and she made me re-take inventory THREE times? and for the record – ” shiloh interrupts her sentence to point the nail polish brush at cordelia, giving her a look that she’s sure conveys complete sincerity and innocence. “ – for the record, i did NOT miscount the t-shirts. one definitely disappeared right before i counted the third time. she acted like it was my fault that our museum’s ghosts are particularly fond of t-shirts with historical puns on them.” ( in fact, she had told cordelia about that particular situation – several times. it bore repeating. ) “either they call or we’re getting ourselves out of here, JAILBREAK style. besides, i was hoping they’d let me roast marshmallows this year.”

[ofshilch-blog]

dcnatellas‌:

she felt awkward most of the time. 

every corner she turned, she bumped into someone she used to have some kind of positive relationship with. it was funny the amount of people she lost in just a couple of months, it almost felt like coco’s revenge. she couldn’t help her sister, so now no one could help her in return. 

some of the people she didn’t talk to anymore, she had actively pushed away. some she lost contact as a consequence of her own sorrow. the ones she didn’t mean to loose contact with hit her different, because they were the people she was expecting to fall back onto when she had no one. and when she finally started feeling human again after coming back from la and realized she had lost more than she bargained for, hopelessness set in.

so seeing how much shiloh didn’t want to talk to her was almost like reopening old wounds. the dark room used to be the place they felt the most comfortable in, and now they couldn’t even exchange a few words without it feeling strange, like maybe they were in a different universe and in this one they had never been friends before. ❝ oh. yea, um. not really thrilled about being stuck here, if i’m being honest. ❞ not that she really had holidays plans either, she’d just spend it with her father, their routine of uncomfortable silence dominating the room. ❝ so i kind of wish they’d let us go as soon as possible. ❞

shiloh put her arms around herself – a physical barrier between her and the other girl, something to keep old emotions from resurfacing. she had spent so long convincing herself that donatella hadn’t meant anything to her, that she must have made up most of the memories she had of them together, either out of loneliness or infatuation.

because how else could she explain that the person she looked up to more than anyone in the world barely deemed her important enough for a text message after a mere summer spent apart? the rumours she had heard around covington ( ‘ donatella navarro is a shallow bitch. you were friends with her? ’ ) only served to reinforce that the girl wasn’t anything at all like the girl of shiloh’s memories.

she had spent so long building up the villainous image of donatella in her head that to see her in the flesh was kind of a shock. she didn’t want to stand here talking to her as if they were friendly acquaintances, felt bile rising up her throat at the idea of making small talk with the person she once entrusted with her most intimate secrets. the thing she longed for more than anything was for her pictures to finish developing, and for her to walk out of here with that image of donatella navarro still intact. because while that donatella was in all likelihood as much of an illusion as the one shiloh once called a friend, being able to thrust the role of the villain upon her had been a comfort. after all, the alternative – the idea that she had somehow contributed to their current estrangement, that there was something about her that had stopped being worthy of attention or love… it was too much for the girl to bear.

❝ we don’t have to do this, okay? it’s fine. you don’t have to pretend we’re friends. these pictures are almost done, and then you can just go back to wishing i never enrolled at this school in the first place. ❞ she wasn’t sure if the words said aloud made her feel better or worse.

[ofshilch-blog]

paintingpeyton‌:

   more often than not, peyton felt like it was a fluke, her being at covington. before the melanie bullshit, before that confusing party and the police — she’d been questioning her place there, but now it felt heavier than before. the dissonance she felt with the place. 

   being stuck on campus was definitely not doing good things for peyton. 

  no one wanted to talk about, or maybe no one felt as weird about the whole thing as peyton did. her thoughts, however, came as an echo when shiloh spoke. once again, they shared the same wavelength. “no, don’t apologize, it’s fine,” peyton thought about the police questioning. the disconnected clues. she felt sick. “um, they asked about the party. and melanie. they’re trying to figure out if anyone hurt her.”

   as she said it, peyton heard how strange the words sounded. the concept of it. “yeah, i… can’t even tell if i’m overreacting by being freaked out, or what, guess i can’t be too crazy if you feel it, too, right?” 

  shiloh nodded at peyton’s words, taking every bit of information in as if it would finally provide her with the answer that was going to make this entire situation make sense. it wasn’t anything she hadn’t heard from the officers themselves, but it was nice to have a confirmation that they weren’t specifically targeting her. growing up with parents who found a reason to blame anything that went wrong on their youngest daughter, it was easy to somehow believe that this was her fault, that she had made melanie disappear by sheer force of will. and sure, she wasn’t the biggest fan of the girl while she was around, but it’s not like she wanted anything to actually happen to her.

  she leaned her head on her knees, blowing a strand of hair away from her face. “fuck, don’t talk to me about overreacting. i just feel like – like they’re waiting for one of us to trip up and admit to something, and i’m scared it’s gonna be me, which is crazy because i – i haven’t even done anything.” she laughed again, rubbing her face with her hands slightly aggressively. “you know, my theory’s actually that she’s on a beach somewhere, drinking a cocktail and laughing about our winter break being ruined. she always seemed so perfect. that couldn’t have all been real. just look at how many people hated her guts. there was something... off there, y’know?”

[ofshilch-blog]

paintingpeyton‌:

   “god, fucking tell me about it,” peyton’s eyes rolled hard. the comfort that could be found in just complaining about something so normal surprised her. usually, academics were the last thing the blonde ever wanted to think of, much less discuss, but it sure beat the current elephant in the room. 

   thanks to maverick’s ever so kind helpfulness in supplying peyton with booze (almost on command) and other vices, she’d managed to stay fairly blitzed since the party. it wasn’t in character for her, but peyton was eager for the chance to just try and fade out the world while this madness continued. she knew she as innocent — eventually everyone else would, too. until then? 

   fuck the world. 

 “all the they have me doing in psychology is useless because i’m gonna fail my math, and, i don’t know, probably others. it’s ironic since the only thing i’m actually doing good in is what i want to do for work but they don’t care because i can’t algebra correctly. fucking over it. i just want out.” 

   “that fucking sucks, man. math is a fake subject anyway. nothing a computer won’t do for you.” shiloh nodded in solidarity. in a school that prided itself on its academics, coming across someone who didn’t have their nose stuck in a textbook for the majority of the day was a bit of a rarity. it was exactly for that reason that shiloh felt so comfortable in the presence of the other girl.

  shiloh shifted uncomfortably, her hand coming up to play with the necklace she put on that morning. “hey, are you doing like… okay? what did they – what’d they ask you?” she asked, trying not to sound too eager. ever since her interrogation she had been dying to know what the other students stuck on campus were going through, whether they were singling them out or really just ‘gathering information’, as one of the officers had told her. she laughed a breathy little laugh, realizing how paranoid she was getting. “sorry, i – i shouldn’t have asked. you shouldn’t even tell me, probably. it’s just that all of this is really fucking with my head. like, what the hell is going on?” despite her earlier resolution, the bottle she was holding was lifted to her mouth and she gulped a few mouthfuls of it down. there was no way she was doing this sober.

[ofshilch-blog]

ofaurclia‌:

         she should know to expect an indifferent response by now. her proximity to shiloh, both due to them sharing a campus and sharing blood, has meant that their interactions are more frequent than aurelia would like. unlike shiloh, she always obeyed instructions and delivered exactly what was asked of her — if not more. aurelia grew up in an asphyxiating world of expectations, as atlas carrying the world of the world on her shoulders while keeping her body poised and her expression stoic.

         she should know to expect nothing but indifference, yet she’s still taken aback by shiloh’s dismissal of her vile attitude — and invitation to lunch. for a second, aurelia fumes. it feels almost disrespectful, as her venomous words are brushed off and disregarded without a second thought. aurelia knows she should be used to it by now. yet as features remain unfazed, something within her stings. she blinks in surprise a couple of times, parts her mouth — speechless, for once, but she masks it with a fake cough. ‘ i … suppose i have nothing better to do, ’ aurelia concedes, cursing her empty schedule and the lack of people on campus. despite everything, family is family. and she knows her parents would approve of her having lunch with shiloh. ‘ so. which five-star restaurant in campus are we having lunch at ? ’

         she feels a flutter in her chest, the beginning of a smile starting to form on her face before she promptly straightens it back into a neutral look. in truth, she’s always admired her cousin, and the girl wanting to spend time with her is something that’s precious to her — even if it’s something as silly and meaningless as a lunch date. yes, aurelia grew up with pressures that shiloh knew nothing of and is grateful she hasn’t experienced, but she is a success story in the most conventional sense of the word. she’s majoring in a perfectly respectable field, has exceeded the expectations of her family and will go on to grow their wealth. shiloh’s childhood was filled with a chorus of ‘ oh honey, if you could just try to be a little bit more like aurelia ’. while she knows she would never be happy being fitted into the same mold that aurelia was poured into, she feels a strange sense of nostalgia for a life she could have had if she had just … tried a little harder.          as she finishes carelessly dumping art supplies into her backpack, shiloh slings the bag over her shoulder and turns to aurelia. ‘ dealer’s choice. i’m personally a big fan of the dining hall in the main building. the food is so good that i can almost tell what dish they were trying to serve. ’

[ofshilch-blog]

dcnatellas‌:

✦ * · ˚ 001. with shiloh → @ofshilch​ .

location: the dark room .

the thing with being a suspect of murder in this particular case, or whatever else they were, is that other people were stuck in covington too. and, most of the time, the people she bumped into, weren’t really the most welcoming. it’s not like donatella could complain about being not being liked, those were the consequences of her actions. she deserved it. 

she made her bed and, instead of lying in it, she just jumped until it broke and now she had a messy and broken bed to sleep in.

now, stuck in a dark room with shiloh, both of them in the middle of revealing some pictures, silence was deafening. ❝ so… you’re also stuck here, huh ? ❞ donnie tried breaking the ice. it wasn’t that they couldn’t leave covington, the most pressing matter right now is that they couldn’t even leave the room. ❝ did you have plans for the holliday ? ❞

if shiloh had known the dark room was occupied by a familiar face, she wouldn’t have even bothered to go in. she had come here specifically to avoid human interactions. the repetitive process of developing pictures kept her hands busy and soothed her hectic mind. by the time she realized the figure working next to her in the dark was donatella navarro, she was already half-way through the process - and anyway, ruining a perfectly good set of pictures to avoid an awkward conversation was just impractical. so she stayed; stubbornly deciding that she wasn’t going to be the first one to break the silence. she vividly remembered their time in their high school’s dark room, not a second gone to waste as they filled every moment with laughter and conversation. the memory evoked a pang of sadness.

stuck in her own thoughts, she only caught the tail end of what donatella was asking her. ❝ huh, what ? oh, yeah. yes. holiday, ❞ she fumbled, trying to remember how to form something resembling a normal sentence. the time in her life when she and donnie had been able to talk about anything seemed more distant than ever. ❝ uhm, no travel for me this winter, actually. my family’s being pretty insistent on me spending the holiday with them. so, you know – hell on earth. i’m actually kind of hoping this mess with melanie doesn’t get cleared up for another little while, which probably makes me a horrible person. you ? ❞

[malfoysluci]

status: closed for @ofshilch​ date:  december 17th location: a roof somewhere on campus that is easily accessible idk inspiration: x

                 all the remorse …                                              … taking its course

     it was even colder, somehow, on the roof, unprotected by the beautiful beautifully buildings that made up the covington campus. peyton braved the cold, huddled down with shoulders hunched, the last of her alcohol reserve in a small spiced rum bottle that sat between the two. 

    “this feels like a dream,” peyton finally broke the silence between the two, knocking back a foul gulp of the stuff. her face grimaced, and she swallowed it down, enjoying the burn after it finally rested in her stomach. “ever wish we could just… bail, leave it all behind?” 

[ofshilch-blog]

  the cold night air crept underneath shiloh's thin denim jacket and she shivered, easily plucking the bottle from peyton's grasp when she was finished drinking. she nodded vigorously in reply to the other girl's question, making herself dizzy in the process. drinking on an empty stomach had been a tremendously stupid idea, especially with everything that was going on ... but it felt kind of nice to do stupid shit when everyone was feeling on edge and acting like they had something to hide. it was nice to be ... real, and peyton fitted that description more than anyone else she knew.

  “yes. it's like, i got a 65 on this dumb ‘history of western art’ final i didn't study enough for, and technically i could retake it ... but i could also just — fail. it's not like it fucking matters anyway. i mean, fuck, i study art history. writing 'unemployed' on my forehead would have been a lot faster. " she laughed; the words didn't have any real sting to them. the privilige of them being something humorous rather than something that gave her any real anxiety wasn’t lost on her.

  shiloh lifted the bottle to her mouth, before thinking better of it. the last time she'd been properly drunk was at the party that started all of this ... whatever this was. keeping a clear head seemed the sensible thing to do. and shiloh jeong was nothing if not sensible.

[ofaurclia]

𝐃𝐀𝐓𝐄: december 17th

𝐋𝐎𝐂𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍: covington university campus

𝐅𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆: @ofshilch​ 

inspired by do you by carina round !

the hurt that the head forgets, the heart will always remember …

          having a cousin whose life she’s envied since the two of them were children is hard for aurelia. it has always been, as resentment spreads and anger builds within her. shiloh always seemed to have it easier than her, with parents who gave her some degree of freedom from their plans. it’s a liberty aurelia’s never had, and it’s been there, teasing her, just out of her reach, ever since she can remember. and then shiloh followed her into covington, and escape was impossible. her cousin, with her idyllic life, followed her right into her safe haven.

          and now, covington is in tatters. a victory party was all it took for one of her classmates to vanish, seemingly without a trace. aurelia’s felt the stress building within her ever since then, as an empty campus somehow manages to make her feel as if she’s trapped. for years she has been under her family’s close scrutiny, the smallest movements analyzed and corrected if they deviated from the norm. the investigation is no different.

          aurelia’s gone for a walk across campus, airpods in her ears as vivaldi’s winter soothes her mind and a thermos filled with tea in her left hand. the apartment was chaotic, and she’d felt the need for some air. instead, she sees her cousin, and her feet gain a mind of their own as they carry her towards the other, her face void of emotion. a missing persons’ investigation isn’t enough for aurelia to forget her resentment.

         ‘ hello, shiloh. what are you up to ? ready to jet off on another trip in search of self discovery ? ’

[ofshilch-blog]

          shiloh furrows her brows as she adds some purple to the tree bark, not quite liking how her drawing is turning out. she's never considered herself much of an artist, but the funny-looking tree on covington's grounds was interesting enough to spend some time on, and the repetitive movements combined with the cold pleasantly distract her from her own thoughts. she's seated on a bench, one leg tucked underneath herself and a blanket thrown over her lap, when she is pulled from her meditative state by the sound of someone's voice.

          shiloh looks up to find her cousin standing over her, making some bitter comment that's probably supposed to provoke her. she rolls her eyes, already packing her things in the well-worn backpack she brought with her. ‘ about to grab lunch, actually. you coming with ? ‘ as much as she could respond to aurelia's provocations in kind, she can't find the heart for it. years of seeing her cousin being molded into her parents' perfect daughter have made shiloh's feelings toward the girl shift closer to pity than to anger. so she has found a kind of middle ground in dealing with aurelia, ignoring her jabs and stubbornly forging ahead with decorum. it's not out of kindness, exactly — more out of the innate sense that she should probably try to get along with family.

[ofshilch-blog]

TASK 001 → ❛ interrogation . ❜

MENTIONED: @covingtonhqs​ @cagcdbirds​ @brickyellow​

as the men led her into the small room , shiloh could instantly feel herself tensing up . if you placed your faith in anything sora jeong said ( and shiloh didn’t ) , her youngest daughter suffered from an acute issue with authority . from shiloh's point of view , she had no problem with authority. it’s just that generally , authority had a problem with her . she was so used to being lectured to and patronized by adults that held even the smallest amount of power over her , that her mind was already running a mile a minute ; going over excuses and lies for whatever she’d done wrong this time.

the officers seemed to sense her discomfort . “ take a seat , shiloh. we are purely gathering information here . there are no right or wrong answers . ” shiloh simply nodded , sitting down into the metal folding chair , posture stiff as she folded her hands in front of her .

“ can you tell me , to the best of your memory , what happened on the night of december 13 , 2019 ? “

" at the party , you mean? ” shiloh chewed the inside of her cheek , trying to think of anything useful to say. “ uhm , well — i decided to check it out at around nine pm , i think? maybe ten . sorry , my memory isn't the best . i wasn’t really planning to go , but everyone was being really loud and i could hear them from my apartment , and i was starting to feel like a major loser for being holed up in my room and catching up on shows . so yeah , by the time i showed up a lot of people were — the party was in full swing. the mood seemed ... off , though . it felt like everyone was getting drunk to forget about the fact most of them can't stand each other in daylight , ha . it wasn't my kind of scene , so i went to get some fresh air to chat with wolfie — wolfgang beaumont . our resident musical prodigy . i think you’ve already spoken to him . he's a complete dork , but like ... painfully sweet once you get to know him . anyway — i think i decided to go home fairly soon after that . someone told me something about a fire at the party the morning after , but i guess i was already gone by then, because i didn't see anything . ”

“ did you see anything unusual that night ? was anyone acting out of the ordinary ? ”

" not really . as i said , i wasn't really there for that long . " okay , so maybe she'd heard austin talk shit about melanie . what was she supposed to do , list off every person who ever had a problem with melanie ? the metal chair was already starting to hurt her back , she didn't plan to be stuck in the same position for the rest of the night .

“ can you tell me more about your relationship with melanie ? “

“ i don't know . i don't really ... know her. ” she suddenly realized that more than a few people were aware of the type of relationship she and melanie had , and while it wasn't technically a lie , it wasn’t going to look good if she was caught telling half-truths during a missing persons investigation . possibly worse than her wanting melanie to disappear since the day they met . “ look , i'm not her biggest fan , okay ? she isn't an easy person to like . i know people don't like to say that about her , because she's brilliant and passionate and headed for a bright future . but it's not like any of those things make you a good person — like they make it okay for you to just take what you want without caring about who you hurt in the process . so yeah , i try to stay out of her way when i can . we're on the track team together , though . "

“ do you have any reason to believe that someone would want to hurt melanie ? ”

shiloh raised an eyebrow , confusion written plainly on her face . “ why are you asking me that ? you think she's ... hurt? ” the words bring up another memory from the party — melanie crying about overhearing some cruel words from someone she considered a friend . it had almost made shiloh feel bad , especially since she knew melanie thought of austin as a sibling . in fact , it had been one of the reasons she decided to leave early ; she wanted to get out of there before she did something crazy like try to comfort melanie rivera . “ to be honest , i think it's obvious what's going on here . the girl was under too much pressure , she was working herself to the bone . something had to give . she finally had a mental breakdown and escaped to some place where no one knows her name . trust me , i would know . been there , done that. ”

“ do you have any questions about how the case will proceed ? ”

ever since she had been told she wouldn’t be allowed to leave campus until this whole thing had blown over , there was one thing that bothered shiloh . " i guess, kind of ? ... just, why am i here ? as i said , i only really saw melanie during track . i think you'll have better luck with anyone who actually , like , knew her . “ the officer who had been questioning her smiled wanly , straightening the files laid out in front of him before replying . maybe she was imagining it , but it seemed as if he was avoiding eye contact . ” i'm afraid i am currently unable to answer that question . however , i can assure you that if you're not hiding anything from us , you'll be able to go home in no time . ” this time, it was shiloh's turn to avoid looking into the man's eyes.

[ofshilch-blog]

hello pals ! i feel like i’ve introduced myself like twelve times for this rp by now but just in case you haven’t had the displeasure of meeting me yet, i’m mira (she/her), 22, gmt+1. i’ll be writing shiloh jeong, the twenty year old art history major aka the unwritten page. shiloh might be a messy bitch, but she’s trying her best and that’s what matters :((

name: shiloh jeong gender & pronouns: cis female, she & hers age: twenty major & year: art history, first year faceclaim: lee naeun occupation: hemlock history museum, gift shop employee

shiloh’s bio is heavily influenced by the initial label i applied for ( flight risk gang make some NOISE ) so i’m still reworking the details, but i’ll give you guys the 411

shiloh is a hemlock native, she grew up more than comfortable but often felt suffocated by the strings that came with her family’s weath and the path laid out for her

as a kid she acted out a Lot, but her family tolerated it because, you know .... children wack

when she got to high school her impulsive ways stopped being seen as cute, she was expected to have like ... direction and a purpose in life but she was like wait i’m baby

but life doesn’t stop for anyone !! so she basically went through high school constantly acting out and fighting with her family, until she got fed up, tore up her college acceptance letters and left pretty much without an explanation on her graduation day to take a gap year & travel the world

while abroad she fell in love with the different places and cultures and new n exciting art forms she got to see. she never thought college was right for her, but she suddenly remembered covington has a world class art history program and that maybe she fucked up by leaving before giving the school a chance

so she’s back in hemlock to study at covington, and Rly enjoying it ( somewhat to her surprise ) - so what if she starts all her assignments at 3am after four cups of coffee and she skips all her early morning lectures because she’d rather die than wake up before 9am ... she’s still learning a lot and actually Cares about what she’s learning which has been a complete light bulb moment for her

shiloh is really, really trying to be good at covington - to not get into fights, to do her work and to keep her head down. she doesn’t always succeed ( she’s a bit too uh ... honest for that ), but she’s trying to grow as a person and find out who she wants to be now that she’s a young adult and isn’t constantly forced to fight back against her parents’ idea of her

shiloh is not rly a typical extrovert or introvert, she loves soaking up the energy of big groups but she also likes her alone time and more than anything, she prefers to keep people at a distance and doesn’t have many very close relationships ( not for any emo reasons, she’s just way too caught up in her own shit to care much about other people’s shit )

she’s also part of covington’s track team, just in case there are more runners in this group heh

so those are the basics!! imma try to write some wcs tomorrow if i can find the braincells i lost during my last finals this week, but either way i’m SO musey and all of your beautiful charas are inspiring me soso much so pls hit me up and i’m sure we can cook smth up!!

[salemwitchtrials-deactivated202]

Nothing stops me. I’m in a hurry, I’m going. Where? I don’t know, know nothing - except that I’m not where I should be. From when I first opened my eyes I’ve known that my place isn’t here where I am, but where I’m not and never have been (…) I’m in a hurry to be.

Hurry, Octavio Paz (via salemwitchtrials)

[seungyieon]

prettty naeun ♡