GOLDEN BOY !

tristan mckinnon . dependent muse for antemortemhqs. 

[oftristans]

burbage , c . 

Still  unwilling  to  move  from  her  place,  Charity  moved  to  push  a  mass  of  curls  from  her  face  only  to  find  her  hair  was  already  pulled  back.  It  seemed  instinct,  but  the  bothersome-ness  was  apparently  her  own  vision  betraying  her  in  protest  of  the  hour.  The  fact  was  even  it  was  strange  for  her,  a  youth  surrounded  by  vices  she  never  really  took  to,  once  thought  a  mark  of  maturity  she  now  figured  may  have  been  unwarranted  sense  of  superiority.  So  to  even  think  on  it,  made  the  young  teacher  wonder  on  where  exactly  she  had  been  if  only  to  end  up  at  the  same  place.  Too  much  of  a  rebel  to  have  been  a  prefect,  and  too  practical  to  participate.  “This  group  of  seventh  years,  likely  remember  you  more  for  that  than  being  Flitwick’s  lap  dog.  Perhaps  their  words,  not  mine.”  She  grinned,  finally  accepting  her  own  weariness  with  a  slouch  uncommon  to  her  posture.  Her  own  parchments  finally  wrapped  neatly  back  to  scroll  form.  “And  perhaps  I’m  not  as  sane  as  I  would  hope.”  And  she  wondered  if  it  was  humor  or  delirium – rather  an  exhausted  woman’s  assumption  that  what  she  faced  was  hilarity  in  the  face  of  second-year  scrawl.  But  either  way,  her  limbs  finally  let  her  away  from  the  table.  “But  I  could  ask  the  same  of  you.  We  can  simply  go  mad  together  at  this  point.”

          even  with  his  arms  crossed  against  his  person  ,  there  is  a  grin  sported  on  tristan’s  lips  before  he  shakes  his  head  at  the  thought .  he  was  roughly  six  years  from  his  graduation  at  hogwarts   so  of  course  there  would  be  some  that  remembered  him .  and  it  certainly  didn’t  help  his  case  that  marlene  had  also  just  recently  graduated  too .  ❝  how  could  i  even  believe  you ?  just  because  you  were  in  the  year  below  me  doesn’t  mean  that -   nevermind  that  .  seeing  that  you  could  now  be  considered  my  superior  in  some  sense  ,  maybe  you’re  onto  something .  ❞ he  says  with  a  slight  tilt  of  his  head  ,  regarding  her  with  the  same  warmth  he  would  have  even  years  ago .  she  was  the  type  to  stand  out  and  god  forbid  did  he  get  in  the  way  of  such  talent .  ❝  i  would  simply  argue  that  you’re  sane ,  it’s  the  world  that  isn’t  -  and  here  at  hogwarts ,  our  lives  include  staying  up  to  the  break  of  dawn  reading  essays  written  by  students  who  copy  their  textbooks  verbatim  most  times . ❞   it’s  with  that  statement  that  tristan  blows  out  that  last  candle  ,  stepping  out  from leaning  against  the  desk  and  towards  charity .  ❝ that  is  an  invite  i  cannot  turn  down  .  maybe  a  stroll  through  the  candles  will  help  me  sleep  anyway , ❞ 

[oftristans]

vance , e . 

the mess that was the last few weeks was never something she would ask for, but it was certainly enough to keep her mind off of him. sirius black acquitted of all charges – a headline and news that seemed to allow everyone to take a second to breathe. it was that very morning where she finally sat down and the reality of the worry she hadn’t realized she harboured since her visit to the castle came crashing down. despite the quick back and forth with tristan – something that had kept her heart at ease, it all stopped and with that the balloon of that alternate reality she felt like she was living in popped. she had spent a day moping – pathetically so as she tried to focus on work, and yet when she finally let the disappointment take over – there was that quiet whisper, the one that fed into her insecurities – why was she surprised?

that’s what she was good at - readjusting her expectations, when she didn’t have any – there was less of a chance of her getting hurt, it had been her mantra over since childhood, now shouldn’t be any different and because life enjoyed sending her in a tailspin, she got his owl soon after– i  hope  you  are  free  this  weekend. a promise that he was keeping and that’s what friends do, wasn’t it? she had done the same before she had changed things and as much as she wanted kick herself for overstepping, she knew deep down that avoiding him was not something she wanted. as much as her heart wanted more, she wasn’t in the business of listening to it despite recent events and more than anything, emmeline couldn’t lose him - he was one of her closest friends, so all she could do was write him back.

a fling of the door and it was as if her heart had discovered a different beat, “hey” she breathed out, a small smile stretched her lips as she she buttoned her coat, “of course you haven’t – it would be a crime” she joked soft, closing the door behind her as she gestured for her to follow in step, “it’s not too far of a walk” she promised, letting the silence reign for a moment “it sounds silly to ask, but how have you been?” 

      the  brief  silence  sits  there  for  just  a  moment  ,  cheeks  threatening  to  warm  up  when  that  same  elation  burns  bright  in  her  eyes  too  despite  the  winter  air  that  pricks  at  his  skin .  she’s  a  breathtaking  sight  always  ,  but  there’s  something  much  more  alluring  about  the  slight  timidness  that  is  retiring  her  usual  confidence  and  tristan  wonders  what  emmeline  is  thinking  in  that  moment .  the  witch  was  the  firecracker ,  the  first  to  throw  a  quip  to  rough  tristan’s  usual  straight  edges  but  tristan  sees  right  through  her  words  just  then  -  

    ❝  a  crime  to  you  or  to  the  pancakes  ?   ❞   he  asks  with  a  teasing  tone ,  moving  to  follow  her  down  the  path  with  no  hesitance  just  like  tristan  always  did .  the  smile  that  is  on  his  lips  only  falters  for  a  moment  at  her  question ,  though .  it  was  most  definitely  an  innocent  question  to  ask  ,  but  also  feels  like  a  test  .  the  kiss  still  burned  in  his  memories  -  no  need  to  deny  that  even  now  as  he  casts  a  quick  glance  at  her  -  but  then  guilt  settles .  he  hadn’t  meant  for  her  to  feel  abandoned .    ❝ i  have  been  okay ,  ❞   tristan  finally  says but  it  still  doesn’t  feel  like  enough . 

      so  it’s  with  a  sigh  that  he  stops  and  reaches  out  for  emmeline .  his  hand  catches  along  the  sleeve  of  her  jacket  and  manages  to  pull  her  towards  him .  they  aren’t  pressed  against  each  other  like  they  had  been  at  the  black  lake  but  she’s  close  enough  for  him  to  differentiate  the  smell  of  london  air  and  her  perfume .  ❝ how  have  you  been ,  emmeline ?  with  everything  -  ❞  he  doesn’t  divulge  further ,  his  eyes  probably  speaking  for  him  in  that  moment  before  tristan  carries  on .   ❝  i  know  you  must  have  had  a  stressful  last  week .  ❞ 

[oftristans]

trelawney-burke , s . 

it wasn’t uncommon for items for the shop to be sent through the post, but it was with sibel’s name specifically on them. usually they were addressed to the establishment or one of the owners. but, she’d been in the position she was for a while now, so perhaps her name had become popping up more? she was the one who sent the invoices, and wrote the detailed descriptions of each object, which became a passport with it for the new owner. 

once the clerks at the diagon alley post office had determined the stamped packages had come via another magical agency, they’d released them to sibel. and that was how she found herself walking through diagon alley with her arms curled around a large stack of packages. limited view and a cobbled street made for a bad pair, as she found herself misjudging her footing and stumbling forward, packages sliding from her arms.

“kahretsin“ she uttered in annoyance, immediately moving to pick the packages back up.

@antemortemstarters​

         tristan  moves  first ,  dropping  the  brown  satchel  to  the  ground  to  give  his  hands  enough  to  work  with as  he  grabs  several  of  the  concealed  items  -  flashing  the  wixen  a  sympathetic  look .  ❝  are  you  alright  ?  ❞  he  asks  then  ,  suddenly  realizing  that  he  hadn’t  even  attempted  to  make  sure  the  owner  of  the  fallen  objects  wasn’t  injured .  tristan  shuffles  the  items  to  one  arm  then ,  hugging  it  to  his  chest  and  an   arm  is  extended  towards  sibel .  ❝ there’s  never  any  harm  in  asking  for  some  help .  i’ve  got  some  free  time  if  you  need  some  help  hauling  these  things  to  your  destination . ❞ 

[oftristans]

closed . / @emmesvcnce​

      he  had  always  been  a  floo  away  ,  and  it  always  took  just  a  letter  to  find  emmeline  but  tristan  had  somehow  found  a  way  to  busy  himself  since  the  last  time  he’d  seen  her  .  she  still  crept  into  his  mind  at  the  slightest  mention  -  the  skin  that  she’d  touch  when  they  were  last  together  still  sore  from  the  burn  tristan  felt  now  there  was  some  confirmation  that  she  too  felt  something .  but  when  he  finally  receives  the  paper  and  reads  its  headline  does  tristan  finally  move  to  send  the  emmeline  a  quick  owl  - it  had  been  a  rather  small  piece  of  parchment   but  it  was  all  he  had  on  his  person  at  the  time  and  several  inked  words  of  i  hope  you  are  free  this  weekend .  

      and  when  he  does  finally  see  her  days  later  ,  every  and  any  kind  of  emotion  that  he  had  forced  down  came  back  in  full  swing  .  hands  are  in  each  pocket  of  his  cloak  ,  eyes  settling  on  her  person  when  she  opens  her  door  and  all  he  can  truly  manage  at  that  time  is a  :  ❝ hey . ❞  it’s  breathless  but  satisfied  ,  almost  as  if  he  had  been  holding  it  since  she  had  left  from  hogwarts  two  weeks  ago .  the  pair  have  been  incredibly  busy  ,  that  much  tristan  knows  and  there  had  been  no  ill  intent  in  the  way  that  he  had  stopped  writing  her  back  .  tristan  soaringly  knew   that  emmeline  must  have  had  her  hands  caught  with  sirius  black  -  and  somehow  that  felt  more  important  than  entertaining  whatever  moment  they  had  .  it  had  been  a  kiss  that  followed  an  outburst  -   ❝ i  haven’t  forgotten  your  invitation  for  pancakes.❞           

[oftristans]

parkinson , g . 

Georgie would be lying if she said she didn’t look good. She knew she did. Her new dragonhide pants would make anyone jealous. The hide had been humanly sourced, taken only from the dragons as they shed their skins. The process to make it a fabric to work with was one of her own making and these pants were the first to be made of it. Wearing them around was research, really. It wasn’t he fault she knew how to pull them off. She walked down the street of Diagon, letting herself window shop as she did so. A group of kids ran out of the ice cream shop, nearly running into her. “I need to remember to add some stain fighting charms,” she said to herself, not noticing someone watching her. 

@antemortemstarters​

        it  wasn’t  frequent  that  tristan  allowed  himself  a  weekend  away  from  the  castle  or  hogsmeade  ,  but  to  be  encouraged  by  flitwick  himself  to  had  been  embarrassing  enough  to  find  another  excuse  to  stay  holed  up  in  the  private  room .   but  diagon  alley  was  still   close  enough  to  keep  busy  ,  even  as  the  male  finds  interest  in  looking  through  a  stand  of  aged  books  that  were  definitely  torn  but  it’s   a   familiar  voice  that  turns  his  attention  to  the  side  .  the  scales  were  obvious  at  even  the  first  glance  but  by  the   second  ,  he’s  convinced  but  all  he  really  does  is  smile  .  ❝  you  don’t  think  that  dragonhide  itself  would  do  a  decent  job  at  being  resistant  to  most  of  nature’s  ailments ? ❞   he  asks  suddenly  ,  not  particularly  sure  if  the  other  had  even  invited  his  conversation .  

[wells-hannah]

[oftristans]

vance , emmeline .

she had always seen his beauty – truly, even when she was reluctantly completing her charms work right across - he had always been there to ogle at, of course her own stubbornness and need to make things as difficult as she could didn’t allow herself to appreciate how beautiful he was - but it was the kind of pretty that wasn’t just what she couldn’t tear her eyes away from, it was his kindness and honesty that had set her a flame. being this close wasn’t helping her keep a clear mind. she knew proximity had little to do with active listening, but the closer he was - the more captivating he became. a wry smile toyed at her lips – just like any scolding, she had it coming and if she had allowed herself to dream more than understanding that he couldn’t deny her either would be much easier to believe, “must be exhausting –” she whispered, coy glint in her gaze, she felt no guilt and for the first time, she felt like she deserved this moment, “i pay attention to you –” it was hard not too, “it’s easier to believe that it’s not real than be faced with any other possibility” it was cowardly, one of her least favourite things about herself. “i know” she whispered fiercely, her own hand had made it’s way to grasp his cheek - earnest gaze never wavering from his, how could she not give him her undivided attention when he treated her like she was something precious and in that moment - she decided to fall.

nervous was what she was as her gaze dropped to his lips for a mere second before she glanced once more time at those blue pools she’d swim in any day before she gained the confidence she needed, her lips brushed against his tentative, as sweet as all first kisses were – he was everything she had dared to not wish for, but there was an edge of hesitance as she waited for him. she wanted to give him a choice - she had chosen him in this moment, despite the fears that whispered – despite knowing that she was lucky enough to have his friendship and doing this threatened that, this was something else entirely, it was a risk - and he was worth it to her.

“that’s all i want” she promised, and she meant it - she was no stranger to saying one thing and doing another, they were all human and she knew it was easier to listen than be the one to burden, but she’d carry any weight he had in a heartbeat - she didn’t doubt that tristan was so busy being everyone’s rock – her anchor, “i want to take care of you” she admitted softly, “i don’t want you perfect, golden boy” she mused, bathing in the irony, a name that she had once called to irk him, but that’s what he had become - her golden boy, everything good came from.

the sigh that slipped from her lips was heavy - forehead pressed against, she wanted to drink this all in because she knew she wouldn’t get another second of peace for quite sometime, it was bittersweet – she wouldn’t do a moment differently, she stepped away from him, that smile that was painfully hopeful etched at her lips as she gave him a nod, “can’t be making an enemy out of minerva –” her name slipped from her lips and she was already wincing, “i know she wants us to call her that, but that just doesn’t seem right”

       ❝  you’d  be  so  surprised  how  easy  it  is  - ❞   he  immediately  refutes  ,  head  slightly  turning  to  the  side  as  if  her  accusation  was  foolish  .  in  no  version  would  emmeline  ever  be  any  sort  of  too  difficult  .  every  rough  edge  she  had  offer  was  something  tristan  had  come  to  adore  and  just  like  breathing  ,  it  became  instinct  to  look  for  her  .  but  she  catches  his  cheek  before  tristan  can  even  move  once  more  ,  holding  him  firm  with  a  purpose  that  he  does  not  understand  just  yet  as  her  gaze  fiercely  captivates  his  consciousness   .    emmeline  holds  him  as  if  this  was  moment  was  fragile  -  a  glass  that  could  break  at  any  moment  and  it  was  true  -  she  is  suddenly  leaning  forward  and  it’s  a  miracle  that  tristan  doesn’t  tear  away  . 

    all  of  his  attention  is  fixed  on  her  ,  heads  lightly  pressing  together  as  they  were  just  moments  ago  in  a  fit  of  rage  directed  towards  the  world  that  was  burning  around  them  .  but  this  time  , it  was  about  them  or  for  them  -  the  serenity  that  brings   to  his  mind  that  always  ran  on  full  speed  is  what  eventually  draws  him  to  close  that  last  bit  of  space  .  he  finally   decides  to  kiss  her  back  and  it’s  just  as  gentle  at  first  -  hands  only  respectfully  moving  on  her  body  to  adjust  for  the   height  difference  that  had  once  been  just  a  joke  between  them  for  years  .  this  moment  was  easy  ,  so  tranquil  ,  so  needed  -  which  was  a  spectacle  when  many  things  around  them  were  falling  apart  .  tristan  is  almost  tempted  to  feel  selfish  -  how  could  he  indulge  in  a  moment  like  this  ?   but  he  passes  just  as  quickly  as  it  came  as  his  own  body  reacts  to  the  kiss  .  there  was  much  more  he  wanted  to  say  -  and  do  -  but  with  every  ounce  of  strength   left  in  him  ,  he  is  regretfully  the  first  tear  away  .  

      ❝   i  don’t  regret  that  -  ❞   he  says  fiercely  ,  needing  emmeline  to  know  that  nothing  in  him  thought  the   kiss  was  a  mistake  .  just  like  she  had  her  own  imperfections  ,  he  had  his  .  she  was  one  to  always  fix  it  all  ,  though  -  ❝ you  are  easily  the  one  that  matters  ,  emmeline  .  you  -   ❞    he  is  not  even  exactly  sure  what  to  say  then  .  she  was  many  things  to  him  and  yet  ,  the  one  .  ❝  i  do  not  think  i  would  ever  be  able  to  lose  you  .   ❞ 

  the  cold  does  meet  him  first  when  she  steps  back  .  ❝   i  still  have  a  sordid  habit  of  calling  her  professor  and  she  absolutely  despises  that  -    ❞    he  adds  with   a  laugh  ,  hand  extending  towards  her  this  time  and  while  it  was  to  provide  some  balance  along  the  uneven  path  ,  it  was  also  mixed  in  with   the  desire  to  feel  her  touch  once  more  before  she  left  .  ❝  it’s  not  as  frightening  as  having  to  hear  some  folk  call  dumbledore  by  his  first  name  -  even  the  thought  frightens  me  .  ❞  

[oftristans]

burbage , charity . ​​

The  only  bitter  thing  on  being  an  assistant  professor  was  the  bloody  boring,  menial  tasks  that  came  with  the  position.  She  wouldn’t  wish  this  on  anyone,  to  be  awake  late  at  night,  filing  corrections  for  student  essays.  It  seemed  a  pointless,  dauntless  task  better  suited  to  the  students  themselves.  How  brilliant  would  it  be  to  let  them  dive  back  into  their  research  and  find  the  better  answer?  “Your eyes  usually  need  to  be  open  to  grade  essays.”  At  least  that  warranted  a  small  smile  to  the  blonde  across  from  her  engaged  in  just  as  humdrum  work  -  perhaps  this  is  how  Binns  went.  “Do  you  think  if  we  tried  to  do  this  in  the  astronomy  tower  we’d  be  confiscating  some  firewhiskey  from  the  sixth  years?”  She  grinned,  knowing  fully  well  she  never  really  felt  the  need  to  partake  in  such  activities  back  then.  Sometimes,  she  wondered  about  her  teenage  self.  “Flitwick  has  to  have  done  it  before.  Could  you  even  imagine  that  they  didn’t  know?” 

     another  late  night  and  the  pile  of  parchment  on  his  desk  only  seemed  to  grow .  there  is  but  one  candle  still  lit  though  it  was  close  to  burning  out  just  like  him  as  it  neared  some  godforsaken  time  .  some  mindless  charm  had  the  quill  writing  the  notes  that  he’d  speak  out  loud  but  with  his  chin  resting  in  the  palm  of  his  hand  now  ,  the  silence   visited  the  room  like  an  old  friend  .  it  was  charity’s  voice  that  stirred  him  back  to  someone  more  alert  -  ❝   unless   you’ve  got  a  charmed  quill  doing  half  of  your  work  .  ❞   tristan  does  not  even  bother  to   hide  the  fact  that  he  had  most  definitely  dozed  off  sometime  in  the  past  hour  or  so  .  but  it’s  with  the  wave  of  his  wand  does  the  pile  of  parchment  neatly  organizes  itself  so  he  can  finally  stand  from  his  wooden  chair  to  refresh  himself  .  ❝  no  matter  the  time  you’ll  most  definitely  find  someone  up  there  ,  but  do  we  really  want  to  busy  ourselves  having  to  worry  about  that  ?   i  might  have  been  a  prefect   in  my  past  life  here ,  but  that  does  not  mean  i  want  to  mettle  in  those  affairs  again  .  ❞ he  says  with  a  simple  laugh  ,  moving  to  stretch  his  arms  once  more  before  rounding  the  table  to  meet  the  other  halfway  .  ❝  shouldn’t  i  be  asking  you  why  you’re  wandering  the  castle  this  late  too  ?  a  sane  mind  would  be  in   bed  right  now  . ❞ 

[oftristans]

vance , emmeline . 

“more often than i should –” emmeline wasn’t sure what she could have done to deserve his unconditional support, she used to think he humoured her and yet if she looked closely, she couldn’t find a lie and by rowena, she had tried, “i think i’ve learned that sometimes it’s okay to be selfish –” she murmured, if there was ever a moment she had been selfless - it was when she spared him for those brief months of her mess, all he had to do was seat himself across from her and save her the embarassement of being stood up by her own parents and like a flood - he cracked through her resolve. “tristan –” soft and beckoning, “don’t ask me questions i can’t answer –” don’t give me a reason to hope for anything, was what she had all but said – she had always thought that’s what she would want - being important to someone, but with him she had learnt that was the farthest thing from the truth - she just wanted to be important to him. “i think only you can speak to that – “ gaze fixed on where her hand lay, she wouldn’t ask him to tell her if that was the case - he would if he wanted too. she’s like to think that she wasn’t someone to underestimate another - that’s how you make careless mistakes, yet here she had underestimated that had her heart in his clutches - so easy to dismiss his boldness. she was sure that he would laugh it off that when he uttered the one thing she had craved to hear the most, “oh” was what she had breathed out, she didn’t have to fake a stumble as she was pulled into him – “i believe in you more than i believe in myself –” raw as she stood on her toes to brush a kiss against his jaw, gentle – something she wasn’t sure she had been capable of till him and yet it felt more intimate than a kiss and for once she had stopped thinking, “there isn’t a day that i don’t miss you” and it killed that in less than a few hours - she would have to leave him again.

faith was something she had taken for granted, by merlin - she hadn’t realized how much she wanted to believe that things could be different, he was her siren when he beckoned her to look at him, because how could she not? “i don’t like feeling useless” and she knew she wasn’t the only person in her department feeling lost – “i know we’re meant to follow the rules, what’s the point if we’re still losing lives –” it never seized to amaze her how quick he could soothe her soul and despite the cracks being there – she didn’t feel alone. “you’re the brightest man i know, but i need you to remember what you just said to me –” as much as he was her voice of reason - her calm, she didn’t doubt that he carried the weight of the world on his shoulders, “this is bigger than us - so, if you need to complain - if you need to get angry - i need to know that you will come to me, i won’t be the only one taking –” the fierceness in her gaze was unwavering.

“yes –” she promised, a weary smile before she rested her forehead against his, fingers loosening her grip on him as she allowed herself closer to him than she was used too, “we’ll think of something”

     for  a  moment ,  it  feels  like  emmeline  is  speaking  directly  to  him  :  sometimes  it’s  okay  to  be  selfish ,  she  says   and   it  repeats  in  his  mind  once  and  twice  more  .  it’s   a  proverb  that  tristan  had  never  allowed  himself  to  live  by  ever  -  her  next  words  are  like  a  test  to  make  sure  he  was  ready  to  jump  ,  and  it’s  by  some  higher  grace  that  tristan  even  speaks  again  and  his  voice  is  so  still  .  ❝ i  simply  think  it’s  one  that  i’ve  answered  time  and  time  again  .  an  answer  so  obvious  if  you’d  been  paying  attention  -   ❞  a  confession  that  is  so  cryptic  but  tristan  hopes  that  emmeline  can  see  through  it  .  he’s  trying  ,  and  he  wants  to  say  something  else  and  oh  ,  did  he  ever  spend  so  many  nights  recreating  a  moment  like  this  in  his  dreams .  but  comes  the  crippling  fear  that  tristan’s  said  too  much  when  emmeline  is  rendered  speechless  ,  and  the  words  he’s  quickly  prepared  to  draw  back  any  sort  of  implication  is  entirely  wiped  as  she  steps  forward  -  ❝  i  would  never  want  to  betray  that  trust  .  ❞  he  manages  as  her  lips  warm  the  skin  of  his  jaw  ,  that  very  hand  that  first  moved  to  latch  onto  her  now  moving  to  cradle  her  chin  and  gently  encourage  it  up  so  her  gaze  was  fixed  on  him  .  tristan  wanted  to  see  her  reaction  ,  especially  as  it  lit  her  eyes  and  crinkled  the  corner  of  her  lips .  

      his  grip  doesn’t  let  go  ,  but  it  does  slack  .  not  long  ago  emmeline  had  been  the  one  to  claim  that  they  were  a  team  and  tristan  believed  it  to  be  true  even  now  when  it’s  silent  .  the  only  heaviness  weighs  in  their  chests  ,  but  the  vulnerability  was  something  that  felt  easy  with  emmeline  .  ❝ i  cannot  promise  that  i  will  always  heed  my  own  advice  ,  but  what  i  can  say  that  you’d  be  the  first  to  know  .  i’d  try  for  you  -  ❞   that  had  to  be  enough  ,  right  ?   ❝   i   am  not  perfect  myself  ,  emmeline  .   ❞   it’s  a  half  apology  for  what’s  to  come  ,  but  also  a  warning  since  he’d  chosen  to  be  angry  ,  to  be  sad  and  every  other  emotion  in  the  middle  with  her .  

     the  relief  envelopes  him  with  warmness  when  their  foreheads  are  pressed  together .  he  stays  there  ,  eyes  closed  for  another  moment  -  we’ll  think  of  something  ,  repeating  in  his  mind  like  a  broken  record  .  others  had  said  the  same  to  him  before  but  this  was  no  false  hope  ,  this  felt  like  the  closet  to  truth  tristan  had  gotten  in  months  .  emmeline  vance  and  tristan  mckinnon  would  figure  out  something  together  -   ❝ we  should  probably  head  back  to  the  castle ,  ❞  tristan  says  finally  with  a  sigh  until  he  finally  steps  away  with  her  ,  hands  now  slipping  back  into  the  sides  of  his  robes  like  they  were  beforehand  .  ❝  i’d  hate  for  you  to  be  late  for  your  portkey  home  .  ❞ 

[oftristans]

vance , emmeline . 

looking at him - she might even get a brief taste of what it was like to be important to someone, it was the kind of feeling that was addicting but left you raw and unhinged the second it was gone.  she had spent a better part of her childhood starved of that affection and here he was soothing that wound without even realizing it, “– and that’s because someone needs to get their hands dirty, no one suspects the small witch” glint in her gaze - it was easier when people underestimated her - emmeline vance, hit wix extraordinaire, yet no one saw the steel underneath until it was too late. she knew that there was a world of things happening around them - she was sure the birds were chirping just a moment ago - the wind rustling the fall leaves, chipping away at those trees as if it was never too early to get a start on winter but none of it matters, his question had her far more still than she knew herself capable of. she was searching for a lie - because it had always seemed too good to be true, his kindness - he need for her company but in moments like this was undeniable - just like he was. she was conscious of the fact that she had taken another step closer, gaze dropping to his chest as she rested her palm against it instead. as if hearing his heart would help - if it beat as erratic as she was feeling than perhaps she wasn’t such a fool for what she was about to say next, “you never needed a pass –” she murmured, “i have never been able to deny you and that’s simply because i don’t want too - i have no intention of starting now” raising her gaze finally to meet his – challengingly, “go on then”

“well, if you’re missing leaky cauldron food despite a feast three times a day, i can’t help but worry you’re a bit too homesick, i promise -the food is still quite mediocre” smile widening, she had frequented the popular pub far too many times a week, truly - she was on a hunt for a new place before she grew tired of it. “brilliant - pop on over any sunday, it’s been my day off as of late and i can’t see them pulling a fast one on me anytime soon” hours were as unpredictable as their current times - all she could do was roll with it. the gasp that left her lips would be of offence if she was capable of it with him, “i was an angel –” she could barely say it without the chuckle that followed, “alright - i was an absolute nightmare - but that’s why we were brilliant, you were always the calm to my storm” she shrugged, a genuine smile etched at her lips.

“you think i don’t agree with you?” she whispered fiercely, “that it’s ridiculous that’s so many have to die for them to realize it’s time to do something - as if we need further proof before we can take action, one life should be enough and it shouldn’t have come to that and here we are and it’s not stopping –” she was at her wits end and this was the first time she had allowed herself to let it all go. eyes shutting tightly – it hurt to think of the children, “i don’t know what to do –” she admitted honest, blinking away the moisture gathering in her eyes, “we’re hitting dead ends at work - anytime we get a proper lead - someone disappears and with our other job” fingers gripping his shirt gently, “they haven’t decided on what to do and i can’t force their hand when i don’t have a plan” exhausted was what she was. she had joined the order for a reason and she didn’t doubt the good they were doing - but they weren’t as aggressive in their tactics and this is why they were currently backed into a corner.

       a  small  sound  of  amusement  was  his  only  immediate  response  ,  tristan’s  head  falling  forward  slightly  ,  chin  dipping  against  his  shoulder  with  a  breath  of  victory  that  emmeline  vance  thought  of  herself  as  highly  as  he  did  .  ❝  the  small  witch  tends  to  get  what  she  wants  ,  then  ?  ❞   it’d  be  a  lie  if  he  denied  her  noticeable  step  forward  ,  but  tristan  doesn’t  dare  move  away  or  acknowledge  it  directly  in  fear  that  emmeline  would  somehow  disappear  into  thin  air  .  this  moment  was  as  tangible   as  the  mist  humid  in  the  air  -  hands  only  falling  to  catch  against  the  pocket  of  her  cloak  to  keep  himself  steady  .     ❝ and  do  you  think  i’ve  ever  felt  the  same  ?    ❞   tristan  asks  with  a  pause  ,  his  gaze  joining  hers  when  they  fall  to  the  hand  that  is  pressed  against  his  chest  almost  wondering  if  thats  what  caused  the  electrical  impulse  .  ❝ so  if  that’s  true ...   what  you  just  said  -  ❞     the  warmth  from  her  body  radiates  off  her  person  like  a  furnace  ,   warming  up  the  bits  of  him  that  had  iced  any  possibility  of  wanting  to  indulge  any  kind  of  feeling  ,  especially  when  it  came  to  emmeline .  tristan  wanted  to  imagine  that  her  skin  burned  for  him  ,  even  in  the  cold  winter  air .  she  was  the  kind  of  weakness  that  would  cause  him  to  fall  on  any  sword  ;  swallowing  any  kind  of  rationality  before  he  could  even  admit  that  he’d  fallen  .  ❝ i’ve  missed  you  -  and  i  think  i  will  continue  to  miss  you  when  you  leave  again .  ❞   now  the  fingers  that  have  latched  onto  her  pull  a  bit  ,  testing  her  reaction  before  he  even  dares   anything  else  .  ❝  so  you’ll  never  have  any  grounds  to  doubt  me  again  . ❞ 

    he  probably  was   a  tad  homesick  ,  more  so  when  the  night  swallowed  his  private corridor  and  all  tristan  was  left  was  memories  to  shovel  through  as  company .   emmeline  had  a  tendency  to  haunt  them  the  most  ,  and  it’s  in  his  nightmares  that  her  face  constricts  like  this  -   ❝ of  course  i  know  we  are  on  the  same  team  , ❞  it  sounds  even  more  ridiculous  when  he  repeats  after  her  cause  like  she  had just  said  not  long  ago  ,  they  were  a  team  and  he  had  to  calm  her  storm  .  ❝  you’re  practically  having  to  chase  ghosts  ,  emmeline  .  you  realize  that  ?  no  practiced  person  could  even  be  better  than  you  at  that  .  ❞   the  cracks  in  her  demeanor  felt  like  a  private  moment  that  tristan  hadn’t  meant  to  invade  ,  but  he  understood  -  he  understood  what  it  was  like  to  be  frustrated  ,  and  angry  and  annoyed  and  tired  and  ...  ❝  listen  to  me  ,  ❞   a  plead  for  emmeline  to  listen  ,  to  open  her  eyes  so  he  can  get  through  to  her  .  ❝  this  isn’t  on  you  .  this  is  bigger  than  us  two  ,  so  if  the  only  thing  we  can  do  is  complain  or  talk  ,  then  we  keep  doing  that .    ❞ 

   but  for  some  reason  ,  even  just  talking  felt  wrong .  like  it  somehow  only  added  to  the  seemingly  complacent  group  of  people  he’s  been  sworn  to  protect .  he’d  tell  her  that  he’d  fight  alongside  her  then  there’s  the  sensible  consequence  of  rushing  in  blindly  that  has  tristan  holding  his  ground  .  to  wear  his  heart  on  his  sleeve  was  dangerous  but  he’d  trust  it  with  emmeline  -  even  in  her  madness  .  ❝  we’ll  think  of  plan  ,  then  .  us  two  -  cause  there  has  to  be  something  ,  right  ?  ❞ 

[oftristans]

shacklebolt , kingsley . 

It was nice to see Tristan outside of meetings, even if it meant he wasn’t sleeping. There was no way that man didn’t need more sleep. Ah, the optimism of youth. “This visit is all pleasure. Nothing sensitive.” Kingsley said with a wave of his hand. “Just a man checking in on his friend. Tell me, how’s the year going? Hopefully my nephew’s not giving you too much trouble.”

           at  the  release  of  any  responsibility  ,   tristan  draws  out  a  sigh  of  relief  and  sits  back  in  his  chair  :  almost  cheering  the  cup  in  his  hands  to  himself  .  ❝ the  year’s  been  spectacular  -   ❞  true  excitement  laced  in  his  voice  because  for  the  first  time  since  he’s  graduated  ,  tristan  felt  like  the  work   he  was  doing  these  past  months  actually  meant  something  .  ❝  your  nephew  ?  no  ,  definitely  not  .  he’s  quite  brilliant  ,  actually  .  you  think  he’s  going  to  follow  in  your  steps  ?  ❞   

[oftristans]

longbottom , frank . 

“what can i say? i’m a simple man and a cheap date.” he points out the price of the chocolate swirl, raising an eyebrow at tristan before laughing and shaking his head. “come on then, pick one, i’m buying.” he gives his arm a squeeze as he enjoys his treat, “better be a ridiculous flavour for all the flack you’re giving me, yeah?”

          ❝  have  you  put  much  thought  as  to  why  they  must  discount  the  flavour ?  there’s  being  a  cheap  date  and  being  cheap  ,  i’m  afraid  - ❞    tristan  adds  with  a  slight  shake  of  his  head  ,  only  shooting  frank  a  look  moments  later .  ❝ i  already  know  you’re  going  to  give  me  some  slack  for  asking  for  the  apple  crumble  -   ❞      

[oftristans]

vance , emmeline . 

the smile that stretched her lips was devious to say the least - he was humouring her, she knew it - she was no hero, but seeing him unbridled, even if it was just for a moment - for a laugh she was able to give him, as much as she adored the composed man that she knew so well - seeing him free, that was the sight of him that kept her up – “that would be you –” she murmured, twinkle in her gaze, as she slowed her steps just enough to be nearly in front of him, fingers tapping against his chest, “you’re the hero, i’m more of a necessary evil” she got the job done. she wasn’t as noble as he was - he was a warm sunny day and she was that dreary raining morning – two ends that have no business meeting and yet, here she was for him- no summoning charm required, he had her wrapped around his finger,  whether he knew it or not was the question. “i won’t ever say no to that delicious feast, tristan - but, if you miss me that much, you could say so” words teasing - as if he would ever, it was a dance she tended to do - a few brief moments with him seemed enough to tide her over. she couldn’t remember the last time she had tried to go on a date - it had lost its appeal and she wanted to believe it had nothing to do with the man before her, but she wasn’t that deep into her denial.

she hadn’t missed the outstretched hand, and maybe if she was more brazen - she would have tumbled right into him, it wasn’t the first time she had seen someone do that and yet emmeline, as much as she had her faults - she had never really been a damsel in distress. he was there - her safety net, to catch her if she had fallen and over the years – figuratively speaking, she had fallen a few times with him and he had always been the support she had needed - even if was that comforting silence as they sat, “i think it’s less dreary - more colourful actually and they don’t serve any of the good stuff -” wiggling her brows, if she missed a drink in the morning - that would probably be for the best, “but they have a great milkshake and the fluffiest pancakes – i’ll save it for a sunday that you visit” she promised. nose wrinkling - as if she could really be offended by the truth, “you poor thing –” brushing against his side, a knowing look crossing her features, “they can’t possibly test your patience like i did and i managed to survive - i had a great teacher” she murmured, honesty would all her see in her gaze, “they’re in good hands - lucky bastards”

a sigh escaped her – she couldn’t lie, not to him. “it’s not looking good –” she whispered, drawing close, as if the trees had ears, “the death count is rising - it’s not just muggleborns - it’s muggles, the patterns are erratic” she muttered, rather lost. their leads had gone dry or well dead. “we’ll manage –” the only thing that kept her sane to an extent, was that he was here, he was safe and away from the chaos as much as he could be at least before he took up another task, “if it gets bad – i will let you know” that was all she could give him, he was doing important work here - shaping the minds of the future and all that.

      it  is  incredibly  easy  to  hold  that  very  same  smile  on  his  lips  -  even  when  a  single  finger  pressed  against  his  chest  forces  him  to  stop .  head  playfully  rolls  to  the  side  so  he  can  size  up  the  shorter  witch  ,  eyes  bright  with  humor  but  also  a  hint  of   disbelief  that  emmeline  was  always  so  quick  to  dismiss  herself  .   ❝  i  will  only  agree  that  you’re   necessary  ,  ❞    he  would  have  said  that  she  was  necessary  to  him  -  that  she  was  simply  the  most  balancing  force  in  his  life  at  the  present  time  even  if  tristan  had  always  sworn  to  be  so  independent .   they  always  say  time  moved  fast  when  you  kept  yourself  busy  ,  but  tristan  wasn’t  sure  when  emmeline  had  ever  become  such  a  strong  force  for  him  .  maybe  it  was  always  like  that  with  her  ;  so  natural  ,  so  delicate  -   ❝   and  if  i  told  you  that  i  did  miss  you  ,  what  then  ?   does  that  allot  me  some  unrefundable  pass  to  see  more  than  just  some  holiday  ?  ❞  his  right  arm  raises  then  ,  fingers  barely  grazing  the  clothed  skin  of  the  arm  that  she’s  got  stuck  on  him  still .  it  was  another  one  of  those  instances  when  tristan  spoke  before  thinking  ,  words  thick  with  emotions  that  he’s  compelled  himself  to  bury  .  ❝ cause  i’ll  say  it  then  .❞ 

        even  with  the  mundane  imagery  that  he  has  painted  in  his  own  mind  of  the  muggle  diner  ,  it  still  vastly  fascinates  him  -  there  was  many  times  that  he’d  willingly  ventured  into  areas  populated  with  muggles  and  there  truly  wasn’t  much  difference  about  them  which  only  felt  so  villainous  to  wonder  why  anyone  could  ever  place less  worth  on  their  existence .  ❝   sounds  like   i’ll  have  very  little  time  to  even  miss  some  of  the  food  they  usually  have  at  the  leaky  cauldron  -  ❞  he  says  though  that  wasn’t  necessarily  a  difficult  feat  anyway  .  ❝  but  at  least  i  can  still  look  forward  to  a  very  sweet  meal  regardless  .   ❞   no  matter  the  fact  that  the  company  alone  was  enough  reason  to  even  justify  braving  such  a  brand  new  feat  ,  but  no  ,  tristan  was  going  because  he’d  been  invited  ...  ❝ you  survived  me  ?  sounds  a  lot  more  unlikely  than  the  opposite  .  i  somehow  survived  you  -  ❞   tristan  refutes  with  a  shake  of  his  head  ,  more  so  due  to  the  irony  that  for  some  reason  he  was  still  so  drawn  to  her  now  .  they  were  still  friends  ,  no  more  needless  help  or  class  to  keep  them  coming  back  to  each  other  .  it  was  purely  for  selfish  reasons  now  . ❝  we  made  a great  team  even  back  then  ,  i  think  . ❞  

    tristan  is  not  necessarily  sure  what  he  had  expected  to  hear  .  he  knew  that  it  was  bad  ,  but  to  hear  someone  with  an  inside  perspective  sound  so  defeated  -   ❝ that’s  the  thing  ,  emmeline  ,  ❞  a  frustrated  sigh  dews  from  his   lips  as  his  back  straightens  .  ❝ sure  ,  we’re  managing  for  now  .  but  the  cost  -  we’re  paying  too  much  as  we  wait  . ❞   he  hadn’t  even  thought  about  regulus  for  days  ,  a  mission  that  was  on  such a  need  to  know  basis  that  tristan  could  only  form  opinions  as  an  onlooker .  for  someone  who  was  so  used  to  moving  ,  tristan  felt  like  he  was  doing  nothing  here  at  hogwarts .  ❝ you  shouldn’t  have  to  wait  until  more  people  are  hurt  or  missing  to  tell  me  ,  emmeline  .  the  children  here  ,  emmeline  ...  in  just  a  month’s  time  ,  they  will  be  visiting  their  families  .  and  for  some  of  them  ,  they  might  not  have  the  same  faces  waiting  for  them  anymore . ❞  no  part  of  him  even  blames  emmeline  for  this  ,  he  needs  her  to  know  that  .  she  and  any  other  ministry  worker  was  doing  their  best  ( or  so  he  would  like  to  think  )  .

[oftristans]

closed . / @kingsley-adam​

        ❝  i  don’t  think  i’ve  ever  been  so  thankful  to  be  at  hog’s  head  -  ❞   even  as  he  carries  a  rather  lukewarm  cup  of  butterbeer  in  the  palm  of  both  hands  ,  it  is  probably  the  first  time  he’s  managed  time  to  walk  off  campus  grounds  in  weeks  without  any  students  trailing  around  .  ❝  but  of  course  ,  to what  do  i  owe  the  pleasure  of  seeing  you  ,  my  friend  ?   if  it’s  something  sensitive  ,  ❞  a  head  roll  to  the  side  to  silently  point  out  the  stairs  that  went  upstairs  to  the  rooms  he’d  been  in plenty  of  times  .  

[oftristans]

vance , emmeline . 

halloween always had a soft spot in her heart - she could only thank Hogwarts for making it more magical, that and the memories she kept closest to her heart, so yes – when they had asked for an additional check, a posting at Hogsmeade for the day had become an excuse to frequent the grounds she missed so much - which then of course gave her a reason to visit a certain Mckinnon. adjusting her leather jacket as she cast a look over her shoulder before her body took a spin of walking backwards – she trusted him to keep an eye on her path and not have her running into a tree, “do you think so little of yourself?” she questioned, cocking a brow as a devious smile stretched her lips, “– the food was delicious, the day i turn down a feast is the day that you check me into Mungos” 

she hoped he knew that she was truly only here for him – as much as she loved to walk down nostalgia’s lane, seeing him was an indulgence she couldn’t deny herself of - she had done it too many times. slowing down till she was at his side, turning back, “i’d like that – there’s a great muggle diner i found, it’s a ten minute walk from my flat, but i swear those pancakes are to die for”. she chanced herself another glance before she gave his shoulder a nudge, “so tell me, Professor Mckinnon –” teasing, it was only a matter of time before he would have that title officially  “how are our students doing in charms?” 

​

      ❝  ‘  do  i  think  so  little  of  myself ’ ? ❞   tristan  repeats  after  emmeline  ,   the  hands  that  were  once  pocketed  into  his  cloak  slipping  out  ready  to  guide  her  in  the  event  she  slipped  .  ❝  i  truly  don’t  ,  i’m  afraid  .  after  all  ,  isn’t  it  supposed  to  be  some  kind  of  feat  that  i’ve  got  the  miss  emmeline  vance  with  me  ?   doesn’t  the  world  need  you  to  be  its  hero  ? ❞  she  was  every  bit  of  a  fighter  than  he  was  and  it  truly  made  it  that  easy  to  trust  that  emmeline  was  able  to  keep  care  of  herself .  it  was  just  the  world  that  he  didn’t  trust  . ❝  it  certainly  was  delicious  ,  wasn’t  it  ?  ❞  it  was   easy  to  agree  with  her  ,  always  had  been  and  would  probably  always  be .  ❝ if  it’s  no  trouble  for  you  ,  the  christmas  feast  i’m  sure  will be  even  better  .    ❞  

        and  when  emmeline  stops  ,  tristan  automatically  extends  a  hand  towards  her  as  a  reflex  just  in   case  -  ❝  i  don’t  think  i’ve  ever  been  to  a  muggle  diner  before  .  is  it  comparable  to  the  leaky  cauldron  ,  you  think  ?   ❞  the  very  same  hand  falls  then  as  emmeline  falls  into  pace  alongside  him  and  much  to  his  disappointment ,  it  slides  back  into  the  pocket  of  his  cloak  for  fear  it’d  brush  against  hers  .  her  question  encourages  a  bubbling  chuckle  ,  only  stopping  in  his  tracks  then  to  give  a  glance  towards  the  castle  that  was  partially  still  in  view  from  where  they  were  standing  by  the  path  alongside  the  lake  .  ❝  most  of  them  are  managing  .  a  few  have  managed  to  even  be  more  confused  than  you  were  at  the  time  . ❞  tristan  teases  before  looking  back  towards  her  ,  eyes  set  on  her  face  with  the  shake  of  his  head  .  they  would  never  be  a  test  of  his  patience  ,  not  when  he  finally  felt  at  peace  with  something  he’s  done  .  but  his  expression  frowns  only  a  tad  then  ,  the  thought  of  the  world  she  was  probably  experiencing  out  there  growing  ill  in  his  chest  .  ❝  but  is  everything  alright  out  there  ?   ❞  there  was  no  need  to  specify  any  further  with  emmeline  ;  he’s  still  gotten  owls  from  kinglsey  and  his  father  ,  two  very  different  perspectives  :  kinglsey  was  always  so  optimistic  and  his  father  ,  too  realistic .  but  emmeline  : she  was  honest  and  true  .  ❝  nothing’s  changed  ,  has  it ? ❞ 

[oftristans]

longbottom , frank . ​​

“sure it’s getting colder but the fortescue chocolate swirl is something that i could eat even in the winter months,” frank was on a quick lunch break, he had to come down here anyway to question someone on a case that he was working on but there hadn’t been much progress and if frank was being honest he was a little restless lately given the political climate that they were in. 

          ❝  that’s  just  absolutely  mental  , ❞    tristan  says  with  a  laugh  ,  circling  the  counter  that  displayed  an  assortment  of  flavours  .  it’d  been  a  long  while  since  he’s  managed  to  escape  to  diagon  alley  and  this  was  certainly  not  planned .  ❝  more  so  about  the  fact  out  of  all  these  options  ,  you  settle  for  the  chocolate  swirl .  ❞           

[oftristans]

closed . / @emmesvcnce​

       it  truly  was  a  marvel  how  captivating  the  silence  was  at  hogwarts . there  truly  was  something  quite ironic  about  the  peace  ,  though  -  cause  as  students  rushed  to  work  on  papers  and  professors  busying  themselves  with  assignments  and  reading  ,  the  world  outside  kept  churning  .  it  doesn’t  pause  for  one  moment  nor  does  it  care  to  eat  away  at  the  crevices  of  the  seemingly  safe  campus  grounds .   but  seeing  emmeline  once  more  was  a  gentle  reminder  that  not  everything  was  to  be  feared .  tristan  turns  on  his  heel  then  ,  the  pebbles  along  the  path  of  the  black  lake  crushing  under  his  shoes  as  he  keeps  up  with  her  pace  .   ❝  should  have   known  that  it  would  have  taken  the  grand  hallowe’en  feast  for  you  to  find  reason  to  come  back  here  . ❞ 

      a   smile  is  stretched  on  his  lips  already  ,  the  shine  radiating  in  his  eyes  as  tristan  gives  the  witch  a  quick  once  over  .  there  was  no  need  to  deny  that  he  always  appreciated  company  to  visit  him  now  that  he  lived  on  campus  grounds  ,  but  emmeline  always  had  a way  of  feeling  different .  ❝  i’ll  have  to  find  a  weekend  to  floo  to  the  ministry  ,  then  .  keep  up  my  end  of  the  deal  -  ❞  no  matter  the  fact  that  tristan  did  see  her  on  occasion  but  group  settings  with  the  order  were  hardly  for  company  only  .