Hermione Granger

@ohgranger

“I said: I could be a wolf for you. I could put my teeth on your throat. I could growl. I could eat you whole. I could wait for you in the dark. I could howl against your hair.”― Catherynne M. Valente

306 posts

draco-isnt-dead

"I'm not discounting your friendship, weirdly enough. I mean, does it make sense to me? No, but you lot have always been attached at hip. Or mutually attached to Potter's." It used to be the most annoying thing in his life, pre-war. The trio that seemingly couldn't function if they weren't holding hands at all times. At the time, Draco who had come from a world of strict rules and predetermined hierarchy didn't understand it. He had friends but they were ones his family told him to cultivate. To be polite to. Or to use. Hence Dumb and Dumber.

"I also know that war can change things. I was never that close to Blaise and Theo before it, and wand to my head I would have said Pansy was like a banshee I couldn't shake off. Now," He shrugs, "We've all grown up and now I can appreciate them better. Can you honestly tell me Ronald Weasley has done the same? -because from what I can tell the answer is no. You say it wasn't always like this...but Granger." Draco looks at her, really looks. Pleading on some level for her to acknowledge this dark truth. "It has. He's always treated you like this. Even before the war when we were just kids. I've seen him fumble around trying to cheer you up only to turn around and insult you more times than I can count. His trust and loyalty is completely reliant on how much you bend over backwards to accommodate to make him feel good. What kind of friend is that?"

"Yes, he's always been an idiot. But I don't think you really understand how isolating Hogwarts was. I was just a girl thrown into a completely new world. Throw in and being so naturally good at it with a drive to be better...people weren't clamoring to be around me. For a long time I internalized that I was annoying, difficult to be around. I believed it. It's not something I'm proud of, it is what it is though. Now I've grown, and he really hasn't. It's warped him into something bitter and the truth is that I know I need to let go and I will." It feels strange to be having this conversation with Malfoy of all people. She'd be lying though if saying it out loud didn't lift some weight off her chest though. "What about you? You're not happy either, Malfoy, any plans of letting go?"

draco-isnt-dead

Draco taps his finger against the table before him, thinking. "I think tonight I'm just done pretending that I don't want to. It's less about...the buying stuff and more about the fact that I've seen you struggle and not seen anyone help. And that maybe I wanted to be the one who did. Even if it was just in the form of a nice dinner and gifts. I'm not a complete idiot. We aren't friends, nor close enough as coworkers to really express what troubles you but I do have eyes and ears. I know your marriage is a mess as my own." He can't help but roll his eyes, "Though admittedly in different ways. Astoria might be a nasty pill but at least I can honestly say she was the best of my options at the time. To this day I have no idea how Weasley managed to get you to agree to marriage. He brings nothing to the table." Probably couldn't afford a table. Draco thinks darkly.

"There was a time when he and I were friends. Between trauma and needing something that felt safe, it just seemed right. He is one of the few people in this world who knows entirely what I went through. And while we're miserable now, it wasn't always like this." Hermione toys with the ring on her finger, trying to figure out if she could pinpoint where it all started to go wrong. But it wasn't just one thing. It was that they needed different things from life and from each other. Now they were just holding on out of habit.

draco-isnt-dead

The start points of a headache begins to form in his temples; Granger related as always. She was always so difficult, so demanding. Nothing could just be. It had be explained, accounted for and weighed against her monstrous morals.

-and Draco knew without it being said that he was always found wanting.

There was no one in his life who treated him as such. Even after the war. People hated him, rightly so. Rarely did anyone bother to hide their disgust; at his so called innocence, his lack of apologies or misfortune. There was a great deal of society that made it no secret that they would prefer him to be dead or at the very least, behind Azkaban bars.

None of it bothered him. Not really.

Except Granger. He hated that he couldn't read her. Couldn't predict her. Couldn't pacify her or rebuff her. With one snooty nose in the air and a dismissive look he was turned into a childish mess. It was awful.

So why couldn't he stop? Why had, even eleven year old Draco not just turn around and walk away from the supposed girl who should never had mattered to him? Why didn't adult Draco feel compelled to demand her attention just as much.

"Would you believe me if I just said my love language was gift giving?"

The revelation itself isn't exactly a surprise. But it still doesn't really explain why he's so determined to buy her gifts. "Yes, I'd believe it. I'm still just not really sure what that has to do with me. You've never tried to do this before. Now though you seem determined that even after tonight you will be getting me- whatever my heart desires it seems. So what's changed?"

draco-isnt-dead

Draco, who had managed to keep his sanity and composure in front of the Dark Lord himself -folds his arms over his chest and does his best not to simply walk out of the room. He does not need to spill his guts to Granger. They've both had a rough night, no need to make it worse.

"I don't know. Just felt like it. You had a shit night as much as I did and shopping always cheers me up so I figured you could use a hands in that department as well."

"Bullshit, but fine, don't tell me. Which room is mine? I think I'm ready to just head bed."

draco-isnt-dead

"We have very different opinions of what "obscene" amount is. I spent less today on what I usually spend on Theo or Pansy on our outings." -mostly because both of them had a expensive taste that sometimes overwhelmed his own. "You're basically getting miffed I bought you lunch. I was just being nice. Foreign concept I know, but I am capable of it."

"The amount is not the point, Draco." Hermione responds firmly, leaning towards him now. "I'm asking why. Why do you feel the need all of a sudden to buy me anything at all? I'm not miffed, just confused."

draco-isnt-dead

Draco sighs and relaxes into his chair, looking over at Granger with a direct stare. "First off, as much as our younger selves would have rather chew their own arms off than admit: we are in fact each other's life and we always have been. I mean, maybe not as best friends or anything we have grown up together during a war. I would be hard pressed to call you just a coworker. Will this direct line of events happen again? Who knows. I do know however, that we will see each other again and probably when we least want to as well."

"I like your company, and I know yes, we're in each other's orbits and probably always will be. For better or worse. But that doesn't explain this sudden desire to spend obscene amounts of money on me."

draco-isnt-dead

"Why are you determined to not let me." He counters, pushing his hair back. "No one else in my life makes it so difficult to do so. Just you."

"But I'm not really in your life, am I? This is the first time we've even been around each other outside of work, and it happened by accident. Do you really think it'll happen again?"

draco-isnt-dead

"Most people like me better when I'm buying them stuff. You should let me do it to you more often, Granger."

"Of all the things I'd like you to do to me often, spending money on me is not one of them. Why are you so determined to buy me things?"

draco-isnt-dead

"Merely use your wording, Granger. If I said it was more like cream puff than needs-medical attention puff; would that be better?"

She absolutely blames the wine for the way that makes her laugh. "You're ridiculous. I liked you better when you were buying me books."

draco-isnt-dead

He thinks he could bottle that sound. "You did look rather...puffy. Soft but puffy." Draco thinks she looked good but...well he also thinks about how she would look in something sleeker. Something jeweled toned and silky. So that it would enhance her curves and -

He shuts his eyes. He needed to get ahold of himself before he started mentally buying her a new wardrobe. Books he could get away with, everyone gave Granger books.

Dresses were another thing. That was...an intimate thing.

"Ah yes, just what evert woman likes to hear, that they looked puffy," she teases. Leaning back against the chair, she lets herself relax and digest a little as she decides what to try next.

draco-isnt-dead

"Hm. Pity." Draco replies sullenly, watching as she eats like he can be sated by the image alone. And maybe he can't, but the happy sounds she makes might do the trick. "You should try this next." He pushes a bowl of the special butter types the hotel makes. One is sweet cinnamon the other garlic infused. Draco prefers the former due to his sweet tooth.

"Yeah well if you were wearing a fancy dress you wouldn't want to put it back on either after wearing this robe. It feels like it was crafted by some puffy cloud god just for me." She takes the offered butter and tries it on her next slice, letting out a soft sound at just how good it is.

draco-isnt-dead

Draco is lucky he is sitting down when she confesses. His eyes dart to the wine in his hand. Did someone attempt to poison him with a truth telling potion and fail? He looks back at Granger.

"Is it too late to go back and buy you some more?"

"It is way too late. I'm not getting dressed again, not when this robe is the comfiest thing I've ever had on." Hermione says with a laugh. Reaching over the table, she grabs a plate of warm bread and sighs happily at the scent as she spread butter over it.

draco-isnt-dead

"Well, if you can admit it, so can I." He muses, pleased in a way that probably shines out of his eyes but oh well. Draco pours her a glass of wine (more expensive than she probably realizes but what she doesn't know, she doesn't get to fuss about.) "Are you also ready to admit I was about this place too?"

"Never," she offers him an easy smile before taking a sip of wine. "But I will admit that I do think about you more often than I should. And if you had gotten me just one more book, I might even have admitted that sometimes it's in a way a married woman shouldn't be thinking of someone who isn't her husband."

draco-isnt-dead

"Here. Just circle whatever you want with your wand and it will appear on the table." He hands her a menu booklet. Watching with a soft smile, the shopping spree had soothed some restless thing inside of him. Astoria liked to shop too, but she preferred to do it by herself and at home if possible. The less she had to bump elbows with the common folk the better.

Draco liked shopping in person, and with someone. It felt good to help her pick out something he knew she would not only enjoy but use. It brought him back to memories of watching his parents shop together. Standing side by side as they purchased things they needed and wanted in equal measure. For each other as much as themselves.

It was...nice. He could admit it to himself if not to her. (and maybe his future therapist.)

Hermione sits beside him at the table and begins circling whatever catches her eye. And a lot catches her eye. She realizes as she gets to the desserts that she hadn't actually eaten all day. Before the party, her and Ron were supposed to go get dinner. He decided instead to pout and throw a fit about his suit not being properly pressed. So now she was starving.

Everything appears as promised and smells so good she can't help but smile. "I don't think I've been this happy in years," she admits under her breath while twirling a bite of creamy pasta onto her fork.

draco-isnt-dead

Draco does nothing to repress the full body thrill her words incite. Gods, he was really desperate for attention wasn't he? He'd be more humiliated by the reaction if he wasn't so eager to do her bidding. Finally, something he could do. Finally someone who wanted him to pay attention to them.

(He would hire a therapist tomorrow)

Before they actually make it to the hotel, Draco manages to drag her into a bookstore. Not that she really put up much of a fight if she's being entirely honest. But she gets lost in it. Between work and life she hasn't actually taken the time to just explore. What she doesn't expect is for every book she touches to wind up being purchased by him. And...she might be a little impressed with him. She's never really been spoiled and never really thought of herself as someone who would enjoy that.

But it's not the buying her books aspect. It's that he listens when she speaks, he looks like he enjoys her excitement instead of being tired of it. He lets her comb through it all with patience. Doesn't rush her. She has the strange realization that this is the most herself she's been in a long time.

Once she's done they get to the hotel and she immediately changes out of her party dress and into a plush robe. It's soft against her bare skin and she has every intention of stealing it. "Where's the menu?"

draco-isnt-dead

"You're only able to say that with confidence because you've never rested your head on 10k mattress with matching pillows." Draco muses, "Come on Granger, let me make it up to you, you can order all the room service you want. "

"That seems incredibly excessive and you know me well enough to know I'm not the target audience," Hermione points out dryly. "As much room service as I want though...well I guess I'm all yours tonight. Go on and impress me, Malfoy."

draco-isnt-dead

Draco pouts -truth be told he had been selfishly thinking of himself. The idea of buying Granger a fancy hotel room seemed fun. She would grumble, but ultimately be forced to admit at some point that it was better than the hotel she picked. On top of that, knowing he could do something Weasley couldn't, was just about the best christmas gift he could think of.

"Don't think about it so hard. It will be the pent house sweet. Meaning multiple rooms. I just like the idea of forcing you to admit my choice of hotel is better." He shrugs, indifferent. He has shared plenty of hotels with his friends before. Theo, Blaise and Pansy never blinked an eye at him footing the bill. "You can think of it as a Christmas present."

"I'd bite my tongue off before admitting you're right about anything and you know it." She's also just as happy in a normal hotel as she is in a penthouse. Things like that have never really held weight for her. As long as she can eat and pass out without having to hear the sound of her husband snoring beside her, she'll be happy. a

Hermione Granger @ohgranger - Tumblr Blog | Tumgag