[ohmylantern]

I want to know how you justify this all to yourself. How you sleep at night, knowing the pain you've caused. How do you sleep at night knowing you put your unborn baby & your partner at risk by smashing the car windscreen to smitherines? Because telling me that i shouldnt have made you angry isnt good enough.. How do you smile knowing the hurt you have caused a 4 year old boy. The boy you were going to adopt with your lastname oneday, the boy who loved you so much that he chose to call you dad. The same boy who has now witnessed his mother being spat on and his home being smashed apart, all thanks to you. He didnt deserve to go through that, and he definately hasn't deserved the trauma he has been through since. He lost his "dad" and "mummy fucked up, thats why i dont see him anymore" isnt good enough. Because mummy didnt fuck up, mummy has done nothing but protect herself & her babies. If theres anything i have to be sorry for, then I'm sorry I am stronger than you thought i was. Im sorry i didnt take you back after you stood over me & spat in my face. Im sorry i wont let you on my property after receiving a noise complaint due to you screaming that you wanted all the baby things your sister bought our unborn child back, then driving away like a lunatic. Last but definately not least, I'm sorry that i won't allow my son & unborn daughter to live in an abusive household, they deserve so much better then to grow up thinking they can treat people the way you do, or allow people to treat them in abusive ways. They deserve to know their worth, as do i. Thats why as much as i loved you, i cannot look back & we cannot go back.

[thelovejournals]

The hottest love has the coldest end.

Socrates  (via thelovejournals)

[clementinevonradics]

My Abuser, Ever the Optimist, Tells Me He Does Not Want to Speak About the Past, Only the Future

Tonight, I will take the train home from work. I will walk up the stairs to my apartment, through the door he pinned me against as I learned the sound of my own voice begging. I will set my bag down on a chair in the living room. The same chair where he sat, quietly telling me  that if I ever left him, he would mourn with a bullet and a drive into the ink star night, dead for weeks before even his mother knew. (This was a lie, of course, but a lie that keeps my phone on, keeps an obituary loaded behind my teeth, he was a forest of hard truths and somedays, I would say, to protect the living) I will walk through the kitchen where he once promised me children. Promised me a dream and gave me a nightmare. Then a diamond to apologize for the nightmare. Slipping into the shower  (Where once, I hid as he pounded his fist against my door,  a lion’s roaring heartbeat) I will whisper to myself I don’t have to lie to protect you anymore, and I don’t owe you my forgiveness. God, what a short life the bullet has compared to the wound. God, what I would give to leave the past behind and have it stay there.

[dailyinspirationquotes]

5 Surefire Signs That He Just Wants Sex

Just because he’s coming back for sex, doesn’t mean he’s coming back for you. It’s harsh, but it is reality. Get this free report now!

[enamorxte]

REBLOG IF YOU HAVE STRETCHMARKS

This way people can see they’re not alone. I have them and this would help me see that.

[thecommonchick]

“Add me on snapchat” = I will probably never snap u and u will probably never snap me but we can watch each other’s stories.

[stingywithmycootiecat]

True. Sc:Chineyyyyy

[sydneyxrose-deactivated20170623]

[coral]

The scariest moment is always just before you start.

 Stephen King, On Writing: A Memoir of the Craft  (via mergaerytyrell)

[thelittlestdarlings]

EVERYTIME

Everytime I see a pregnancy announcement at the moment, I cry, I’m happy for you all, I really am. I’m just struggling more now than I did at the time. It’s like it’s now hit home what happened. I’m grieving now, I’m being hit with all the emotions i should have felt then, now.

When will we finally get our break?

[frozen-misinterpretations-deact]

[56blogsstillcrazy]

[yokhakidfiasco-deactivated20210]

Seriously. So many gofundme’s for BS like this.

[ohmylantern]

They say it happens to 1 in 4 of us, as if that's supposed to make the pain feel less in some way. But it doesn't. Nothing makes the pain any less. Physically, my body is exhausted, I can't take much more of the excruciating cramps and bleeding. Mentally I can't deal with the blame I'm putting on myself.. Your body is meant to nourish your baby, you're meant to feel as ease knowing your baby will be fine inside your stomach because nothing can harm it there. And then to walk in to the ultrasound, so excited to see your bouncing baby, but instead you hear .. "I'm sorry. There's no heartbeat.." There's no words to explain the emotions that you feel. And while this is not my first loss. Third actually. Words cannot comprehend the pain you feel each and every time you go through this. With my first two angels, I wasn't ready to be a mother again, I was scared & wasn't sure whether becoming a mother again was the right option for me. Though that never ever changed the fact that my heart was broken when the pain & bleeding started. I was ready for this baby, I was ready to grow my family & show that love to this child who had already meant the world to me. I was praying each and every day that this child would carry the souls of the angel siblings he or she had in heaven. I actually had a scan this time, I actually am able to hold a photo of my tiny little baby. But that doesn't make it any easier, nothing makes it easier. Because once you become a mother to an angel, you're never the same again. I miss my angels :(

[tonidanielle98]

I miss my babies everyday.

[brandi923]

[mommynamedyouelijah]

Sleepless nights

I miss being so close to you that I can feel your heartbeat. I miss lying in bed with you. Just me and you and a plate full of food. Planning out a future. A future that never happened. Everyday I wonder what my life would have been with you in it. Everyday I wonder did I make the biggest mistake of my life letting you go. We’ll never know. You know I still love you right? I never stopped. And you with always have a part of my heart. Luv u. But I’ll be alright….if I could just get some sleep.

[saturationii]

school cum

[ruinedchildhood]