Tales from a Lincoln Park Princess

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WAITING AT THE BAR TO BE SERVED

everyone:

me:

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SEEING A FRIEND INSIDE KINCADES

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"WHEN THE CTA SAYS: YOUR ATTENTION PLEASE. WE ARE STANDING MOMENTARILY, WAITING FOR SIGNAL CLEARANCE. WE EXPECT TO BE MOVING SHORTLY"

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WHEN I'VE BEEN DRINKING AND SOMEONE ASKS MY OPINION ABOUT ANYTHING

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WHEN I GO HOME ALONE

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WHEN IT'S LAST CALL

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WHEN A HOMELESS MAN ASKS FOR MONEY ON THE RED LINE

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WHEN I WATCH NEWS NOT FROM CHICAGO

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DRIVING IN THE CITY

everyone else:

me:

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WHEN I GET AN EMAIL SUGGESTING I SHOULD MEET WITH MY ADVISOR

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WHEN SOMEONE WON'T LIKE ME BACK

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WHEN A SORORITY GIRL REQUESTS CALL ME MAYBE

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HOW I FEEL WHEN I ENTER THE STORE