Crying while on meds is so weird. Cause what do you mean I ugly cry for like 3 to 5 mins and then I suddenly feel nothing. I feel so empty and numb.

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@omgitskaaate
Crying while on meds is so weird. Cause what do you mean I ugly cry for like 3 to 5 mins and then I suddenly feel nothing. I feel so empty and numb.
Back to zero
I spent years piecing myself back together after that heartbreak. Anxiety attacks, depression, attempts, drinking— you name it. I did it all. I was desperate.
Only to come back to what broke me, years later.
Now I’m back to zero and for some reason, it feels worse.
1. Higher doses of medication
2. Insomnia (which I had for a long time, but this time I get no sleep for more than 24 hrs)
3. Anxiety attacks
4. Bad dreams
5. Drinking and smoking (worse)
6. More episodes + suicidal thoughts
Tangina. How could you? But an even more important question— how and why did I let this happen again? I keep blaming myself for what happened. Was this really my fault? Should I have known better? Ang lala eh.
Well, sabi nga ng friend ko and I quote…
“Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.”
This insomnia will be the death of me.
MY NEIGHBOR TOTORO となりのトトロ 1988, dir. Hayao Miyazaki
I swearrrr— I will fight for those Daniel Caesar concert tickets!! 🤺
I love film cam photos 🥹
If you ever see me doing hoops, just know that I’m depressed af and I’m just trying to numb the pain 🤣
Sleeping pills aren’t working anymore. I’m exhausted.