paige

i didnt ask to fall in love with a 37 year old emo dad bUt it JUST HAPPEN S SOMETIMES

[princesszeldazbyebye-deactivate]

We all joke about the Hobbits getting Way More Than They Signed Up For but you know who else??? You know who I feel is overlooked in that department sometimes??????? Haldir,,,, our homeboy Haldir the elf saw the One Ring and Immediately was like “naw son i ain’t dealing w/ that today” and yet he lets Aragorn convince him that it’ll be cool, totally fine, “Haldir you only have to deal with our problems for a few hours,” and suddenly before you know it whoops Haldir’s back in the mess at Helm’s Deep just to wind up McFreaking Dead

[omgmcr]

Me reading fanfiction four years ago: OMG THEY KISSED!!! THIS IS SO INTENSE!!1!11!!

Me reading fanfiction now: He just shove his dick so far up that boy's ass I don't even think physics can atone for this sin

[omgmcr]

Eowyn: where is she? the woman who gave you that jewel?

Aragorn:

Aragorn:

Aragorn:

Eowyn: ...are you ok?

Aragorn: oh sorry i was just having a dramatic 5 minute cinematic flashback session to answer your question

Eowyn: dude what

Aragorn: ...anyway,

[souljaboyplayingbraid]

“will will smith smith?” is a grammatically correct sentence

[zora-link-deactivated20131009]

so is “Will Smith will smith.”

[ghiraheeheeheem]

“Smith Will Smith will.”

[ghiraheeheeheem]

I also just realized this could be a conversation.

Will Will Smith smith?

Will Smith Will Smith

*Yoda nods in agreement* Smith Will Smith will.

[esdren]

imagine someone who isnt that good at english reading this and just thinking “what is wrong with these people”

[omgmcr]

dad: I bet in heaven you get to watch the Lord of the Rings extended editions

dad: with J.R.R. Tolkien

dad:

dad:

dad: ...and C.S. Lewis giving sarcastic commentary in the background

[omgmcr]

What she says: I'm fine

What she means: 2016. 2000 AND FUCKING 16. 2015 was like THE BEST YEAR in pop punk since 2005. All the up and coming bands released new music and a couple older ones like All Time Low and Mayday Parade joined in too and I didn't think any year could be better. BUT OH HOW I WAS WRONG because EVERY BAND FROM 2000 IS RELEASING NEW MUSIC IN 2016. NEW BLINK. NEW RELIENT K. NEW SUM 41. NEW ALL AMERICAN REJECTS. NEW GOOD CHARLOTTE. NEW STARTING LINE. NEW SIMPLE PLAN. AND THATS JUST WHATS ALREADY BEEN ANNOUNCED. HOW COULD I POSSIBLY BE FINE RIGHT NOW IM ABOUT TO EXPLODE IM SO EXCITED

[goodsprings]

me: clicks play on an audio post on my dash

audio post: doesnt fucking play

me: ah, yes, My Mistake, why on earth would i expect this website to actually function correctly

[eight-times-nine]

me: mutes a Vine on my dash me: plays another Vine previous vine: decides it has to play as well me: ah yes, Again

[felwinter-deactivated20190201]

my sister has apparently had to stop playing Skyrim because she stole every book in the game to stock her house so now her house is full of books to the point where it almost breaks the game and every time she tries to read one guards teleport into her home and arrest her

[aminoasinine]

Ray Bradbury - Fahrenheit 451 (1953)

[memewhore]

[sixpenceee]

Victor Noir is more famous for his death and his grave than for his life. He was a journalist who was shot dead. To mark his grave, a bronze statue of the man lying down as if just shot was erected. This statue has since become something of a fertility symbol.

Due to the naturalistic style of the sculpture there is a fold in Noir’s trousers which make him appear to be aroused. Myth says that placing a flower in the top hat after kissing the statue on the lips and rubbing its genital area will enhance fertility, bring a blissful sex life, or, in some versions, a husband within the year. This is located at the Père Lachaise cemetery in Paris

[thechubbynerd]

“Honey our pregnancy test came back negative we have to go rub the statue’s dick again”

[thecommonchick]

LMAO 😂😭

[synthetic-ultramarine]

This time last year: what will be the last meme of 2015???

now: what will be that last horrifying real current events story of 2016???

[lamaenthel]

shoutout to paris hilton for not abandoning her ‘micropig’ 

when it turned out that it was a normal piggy who grew up to be a big fat fatty piggu

[chupicronian]

Actually that’s pretty standard size for a micro pig. Pigs are ENORMOUS, dude. The average pig on a farm is 7 feet long and over 700 lbs. A normal pig would be much bigger than Hilton.

EDIT: This is a photo of the world’s smallest recognized breed of pig, the kune kune. I’m sorry cartoons lied to you all.

This is the pot bellied pig, another famous “small” breed.

This is your average adult pig.

[catbountry]

Big ole’ pigs.

[louisville-redcoat]

Reblogging because I feel so misinformed about pigs right now. My life is a lie.

[meanplastic]

#me

[lunulata-deactivated20221105]

I think my favorite panic-fueled response to a petitioner was when someone came up to me in Union Square and said “Hi, would you care to sign our petition for LGBT rights?” and I just blurted out “I’m already gay” and the person, taken aback, said “Well, that’s… nice.” and I said “It really is. Goodbye.” and just walked into the closest store to escape.

[raptorific]

one time I was on my way to a final and this clipboard person was aggressively trying to stand in my way and saying “excuse me sir, can you take just one minute?” and I was like “I’m sorry I’m on my way to a final” and they said “just takes a minute to save a mountain” and I panicked because clearly the truth of why I had to go wasn’t working so I just said the first thing that came to mind which was “Sorry I hate mountains”

[lunulata-deactivated20221105]

This is maybe my favorite response to this post, holy shit.

[moshturbate-deactivated20221014]

I want to get tattoos and get laid

[swolizard]

this is my favorite one