[captaindiscipline-blog]

Twenty Pounds of Crazy || Hardison & Parker

Hardison has long since learned not to try and track Parker’s movements; Eliot (who’s secretly some kind of ninja and or/super-powered guy) has a little more success where the hacker finds himself holding a conversation with a thief who’s no longer there, or jumping out of his skin when she appears from nowhere to poke him in the ribs.

 ”…the safe is on the third floor, so you could get to it in no time if you — Parker? Parker.”

A glance behind him shows an empty space where Parker had been not ten seconds previously. It’s still a little discomfiting, for the number of times he’s been in this exact situation.

  “—woman’s ridiculous. Like tryin’ to keep Houdini in handcuffs.”

[only-parker]

Hardison's still talking as Parker slips out of the room - sometimes he does that, just talks and talks, even when no one's there. Parker's gotten used to the chatter, and usually she does like it. Right now though, it's masking the faints sounds that signal danger, and she can't tell where they're coming from. 

"Hardison, quiet," she hisses; he's talking about some dead guy, and as fascinating as that might be, this is much more important than that. Pressing herself against the wall, Parker peers down the hallway, straining to hear where the noise is coming from. 

[blakeraymond-grifter]

Let's See What You Can Do (Parker and Blake)

[blakeraymond-grifter]

"I need you to steal the money of course." Blake said flashing Parker with a grin. "Once you’ve secured the money, I’ll go hang around the Bar None Bradshaw seems to like going to and simply wait for the opportune moment to show itself. Once it does I’ll offer to lend him the money in exchange for getting in on the action and meeting the boss." He closed the folder containing the case files. "From there it should be fairly easy figuring out how to take Vanquelaz down."

[only-parker]

Parker studied him, the con as Blake told it playing out in her mind. She'd have to make sure to make it look like the kid had been there, and set off an alarm once she was finished to make sure the call got to Bradshaw. And then Blake would do his grifter-y thing and convince Bradshaw to lead them right to their target. 

"We need to do this tonight." Parker checked her watch - late afternoon. The schematics of Bradshaw's office were already floating around in her head, and she guessed it'd take about three and a half minutes to get in and out; and then a few more to trigger the back door alarm, which the kid theoretically might not know about. 

There were a few spare comms in the shelf under the table, and she pulled one out. "Be there at seven - I'll be ready to go then, and I'll wait for your signal to alert his security. Do you need the file?" she asked, holding it out, "And it might take his muscle a couple of minutes to figure out what happened - these guys usually aren't the brightest, so the call might not come right away." 

[megprescott-hitter]

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun (Parker and Meg)

[only-parker]

"You know how to play?" Jack asked curiously, lounging against the end of the table, leaning against his pool cue, a bottled beer in his hand; his eyes travelled up and down her body, and he couldn’t help but smile, easy and light. It wasn’t necessarily polite, and he was typically a pretty upstanding guy, but she was clearly coming on to them. Or so the mixture of alcohol and libido in his body told him. 

His companion, Cameron, played the shot he’d lined up before looking up at the exchange. “Sure,” he shrugged after taking a look at her - even if she was awful at the game, she would be better to look at than Jack. Who knew - some innocent flirting might even cheer him up. There was a drink sitting on the cocktail table beside their seats, and it hadn’t been the first one. 

[megprescott-hitter]

Meg sheepishly looked down before looking back up.

"Well, I haven’t played in a while, but I think I can pick it back up pretty quickly if one of you give me a refresher…." she suggested.

[only-parker]

"Yeah?" Jack asked, looking to Cameron, raising his eyebrow in question - Cameron looked between the two, then shrugged, stepping back to the table to nurse his rum and coke. 

Sliding off his perch on the table, Jack smiled at her. "I'm Jack," he introduced; then he pointed at Cameron, "Cameron. But he just got dumped, so he's no fun. You know how to hold the cue?" He held out the pool cue, but kept it close - he definitely wouldn't have any qualms giving her a personal how-to. 

A blonde chick slipped off her stool at the bar, disappearing. 

[megprescott-hitter]

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun (Parker and Meg)

[only-parker]

A competition? Parker grinned - it wouldn’t be much of a challenge, no matter how thief-y this humble hitter’s fingers were. But still, free drinks, and the distraction would be worth it. “I’ll give you a head start,” Parker offered, leaning back against her seat.

[megprescott-hitter]

"Well isn’t that gracious of you?" Meg teased as she hopped off her bar stool and sauntered over to the pair of males as if they were her prey. She wasn’t wearing anything too provocative, but it hugged her curves just enough to grab the attention of the slightly tipsy marks. "Hello… You mind if I join in?" she asked innocently enough.

[only-parker]

"You know how to play?" Jack asked curiously, lounging against the end of the table, leaning against his pool cue, a bottled beer in his hand; his eyes travelled up and down her body, and he couldn't help but smile, easy and light. It wasn't necessarily polite, and he was typically a pretty upstanding guy, but she was clearly coming on to them. Or so the mixture of alcohol and libido in his body told him. 

His companion, Cameron, played the shot he'd lined up before looking up at the exchange. "Sure," he shrugged after taking a look at her - even if she was awful at the game, she would be better to look at than Jack. Who knew - some innocent flirting might even cheer him up. There was a drink sitting on the cocktail table beside their seats, and it hadn't been the first one. 

[megprescott-hitter]

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun (Parker and Meg)

[only-parker]

Parker glanced over at the pair - someone had joined the guy she’d been looking at earlier at the pool table, and now there was a game going. “How so?” she asked - they were undoubtedly the most interesting thing going on, but other than messing with them, Parker wasn’t sure what there was. 

[megprescott-hitter]

"Well, they look as though they’re being weighed down by a lot of trinkets and stealable stuff. We go over there for about ten minutes, flirt a little, and who ever steals the most off of them doesn’t have to pay for the next round of drinks." Meg suggested. "Unless you don’t think you can beat a humble hitter…" she added as a nudge.

[only-parker]

A competition? Parker grinned - it wouldn't be much of a challenge, no matter how thief-y this humble hitter's fingers were. But still, free drinks, and the distraction would be worth it. "I'll give you a head start," Parker offered, leaning back against her seat.

[megprescott-hitter]

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun (Parker and Meg)

[megprescott-hitter]

only-parker:

[only-parker]

"Well, not a very good one," Parker conceded; but she could run a short-con, if it was simple enough. Not that it mattered. She stopped staring as she said, "But what else am I going to do?" 

Meg spun around on her bar stool and looked around. The bar was kinda dead at this point.

"Well…" she trailed off scanning the room of anyone interesting. The guys at the pool table caught her eye. "They seem interesting enough"

Parker glanced over at the pair - someone had joined the guy she'd been looking at earlier at the pool table, and now there was a game going. "How so?" she asked - they were undoubtably the most interesting thing going on, but other than messing with them, Parker wasn't sure what there was. 

[blakeraymond-grifter]

Let's See What You Can Do (Parker and Blake)

[blakeraymond-grifter]

  Blake nodded faintly as Parker easily followed his train of thought towards his plan. “Exactly. We can take some of the money, not all of it, just enough to be noticeable. Bradshaw is sure to notice the sudden disappearance with it being so close to the date of the money transfer and will scramble to get the money back or get money from somewhere else to over the gap until he can get the money back from his son.”

[only-parker]

"And you show up, the knight in shining armour with a nice little cushion of funds and a hook?" Parker guessed. "Not worried about Bradshaw confronting the kid?" But it would work - she'd grab the cash, Blake would go in, and if he played it right, have a straight line to Vanquelaz.

"What'd you need from me?" she asked, glancing down at the picture again before looking up at him. 

[megprescott-hitter]

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun (Parker and Meg)

[megprescott-hitter]

The bartender brought about two glasses of the Glenfiddich and Meg took a swig before continuing.

"Normally. What about you?" she decided to keep it short and sweet. Just because she was under the influence didn’t mean she had to share her whole life story.

[only-parker]

Parker took the glass and set it aside, leaning against the bar, her head on her hand, watching carefully. Gauging, analyzing. Not the emotions that passed across the woman’s face, or the clothes she was wearing, but the gestures she was making. The way she held herself, the way her legs moved, the way her hand held the glass, the motion of lifting the glass and taking a drink; the small gestures were what Parker was interested in, the nuances that told her if this was a trick, if it was dangerous, if there was something more than just a thief and a hitter. 

"Not any more, no," she answered, after a second - not after they moved out of the Portland bar. They still owned it, because Hardison couldn’t let go any of the employee’s, but they did a lot less hanging around in bars than she remembered. "Kind of nice to come back to it though. Usually there’s better marks around," she sighed. Although lately, she’d been running into a lot more familiar faces. 

[megprescott-hitter]

"You know… just because the people around here are too drunk to be any of a challenge doesn’t mean that you have to try and read me." Meg hinted. "I might not be a grifter, but I know you sure as hell aren’t either."

[only-parker]

"Well, not a very good one," Parker conceded; but she could run a short-con, if it was simple enough. Not that it mattered. She stopped staring as she said, "But what else am I going to do?" 

[megprescott-hitter]

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun (Parker and Meg)

[megprescott-hitter]

The bartender brought about two glasses of the Glenfiddich and Meg took a swig before continuing.

"Normally. What about you?" she decided to keep it short and sweet. Just because she was under the influence didn’t mean she had to share her whole life story.

[only-parker]

Parker took the glass and set it aside, leaning against the bar, her head on her hand, watching carefully. Gauging, analyzing. Not the emotions that passed across the woman's face, or the clothes she was wearing, but the gestures she was making. The way she held herself, the way her legs moved, the way her hand held the glass, the motion of lifting the glass and taking a drink; the small gestures were what Parker was interested in, the nuances that told her if this was a trick, if it was dangerous, if there was something more than just a thief and a hitter. 

"Not any more, no," she answered, after a second - not after they moved out of the Portland bar. They still owned it, because Hardison couldn't let go any of the employee's, but they did a lot less hanging around in bars than she remembered. "Kind of nice to come back to it though. Usually there's better marks around," she sighed. Although lately, she'd been running into a lot more familiar faces. 

[megprescott-hitter]

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun (Parker and Meg)

[only-parker]

Parker grinned, feeling oddly at ease at having found some common ground. ”And here I thought the most exciting thing in this place was that guy shooting pool by himself,” Parker said, jerking a thumb behind her at the dude. Their kind were few and far between - most liked to keep to themselves, and Parker could understand how that felt.

"On a job?" she asked, suddenly wondering if she’d accidentally stumbled in on something. It wouldn’t be the first. 

[megprescott-hitter]

Meg held up her bruised fist.

"Just finished a job… You?" she scaled the woman for anything that was worth stealing on her person; thieves did that sometimes… hid things in plain sight. Grabbing the bartender’s attention, she ordered herself another drink. "Did you want anything?"

[only-parker]

Parker glanced at the bruise, wondering how often it was that hitters got through jobs unscathed. 

"Sort of in-between," she said, and it was more or less true. Nothing currently, and that's why she was here, at a bar, causing fights and trying to fend off boredom and the nostalgia that had crept its way to the back of her throat. 

"Whatever you're getting," she shrugged - her own glass was almost empty, and she was curious to find out more about this woman. So far she'd been pleasant, and Parker absently figured they should run a background check on her, just to make sure it wasn't a cover. 

"Hit up the bars often?" 

[megprescott-hitter]

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun (Parker and Meg)

[only-parker]

Parker giggled, pulling her feet up to perch on the footrest of the stool, safe and out of the way. She watched her current companion make quick work of the fellows, her eyes following the brief flurry of action - it was distinctly familiar, and she felt her skin crawling with excitement. 

The one man was bleeding all over the floor, and the bouncer looked a little baffled as he hauled the first one out, two other guys coming forward and taking the second out, blood dripping after them.

"Hitter," Parker said, using the title as one would a name, calling her out on it. This woman wasn’t just a pickpocket. 

[megprescott-hitter]

Meg leaned back onto the bar and looked upon her new companion.

"Thief." she replied. Obviously if someone knew the signs of a hitter, they would have had to be around it often, and seeing as pick pocketing was a ‘habit’ for this girl, then obviously that’s what she was.

[only-parker]

Parker grinned, feeling oddly at ease at having found some common ground. "And here I thought the most exciting thing in this place was that guy shooting pool by himself," Parker said, jerking a thumb behind her at the dude. Their kind were few and far between - most liked to keep to themselves, and Parker could understand how that felt.

"On a job?" she asked, suddenly wondering if she'd accidentally stumbled in on something. It wouldn't be the first. 

[megprescott-hitter]

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun (Parker and Meg)

[only-parker]

That gave Parker pause - the history the words alluded to resonated with her, and Parker decided she might as well sit down. “You could go help them,” she said, matter-of-factly, taking another sip, her eyes wide and suggestive over the drink. Not that she was trying to suggest anything - other than that she was. 

[megprescott-hitter]

Meg glanced at the woman and raised an eyebrow.

"They’ll be coming to me in…." she raised three fingers, "Three…. two… one….." and as her third finger went down, one of the drunks was thrown over to her feet. "Should’ve bet money on that one…" she muttered as the other thug ran, well, stumbled, over. Grabbing his collar, she pinned the man down on the bar. The grounded thug began to get up, obviously upset over missing the action, and Meg’s heel crashed into his nose, taking him out. The one who was pinned down threw out a blind fist, but Meg, getting quickly bored with the whole ordeal, shoved the man’s fist back into his face, and letting gravity take him and threw him down with his companion. Glaring at the bouncer, she gestured to the unconscious men. "Now, was that hard?"

[only-parker]

Parker giggled, pulling her feet up to perch on the footrest of the stool, safe and out of the way. She watched her current companion make quick work of the fellows, her eyes following the brief flurry of action - it was distinctly familiar, and she felt her skin crawling with excitement. 

The one man was bleeding all over the floor, and the bouncer looked a little baffled as he hauled the first one out, two other guys coming forward and taking the second out, blood dripping after them.

"Hitter," Parker said, using the title as one would a name, calling her out on it. This woman wasn't just a pickpocket. 

[megprescott-hitter]

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun (Parker and Meg)

[megprescott-hitter]

only-parker:

[only-parker]

Meg took her hand off of the woman’s wrist and caught the flask before it hit the ground.

"I would hope so. You wouldn’t get $10 for this flask, which is why I keep it around." she mused before narrowing her eyes. There was something familiar about this woman… but her molasses-drowning thoughts couldn’t pin point it. "So are you a klepto, or is this just playtime for you?" 

Taking a step back, Parker glanced around the place - but no one was paying attention to them, and she crossed behind the woman to lean against the bar on her other side. “Both,” she answered with a grin; then it faltered, and she frowned: “Sort of. People say the first one, and I was hoping for the second but… there’s only so much you can mess around before it gets boring.” 

Two guys across the bar started arguing with one another, their voices escalating until they stopped abruptly, one punching the other in the face. The two bartenders were there immediately, and Parker took advantage of the distraction, leaning over the bar counter and making herself a quick drink with the rum the bartender had left there. 

"What about you?" she asked - she wouldn’t believe for a second that this woman didn’t have ties to some kind of crime; no way anyone not trained noticed Parker picking their pockets. Parker was leaning towards hitter, judging by that wrist long. 

Drink done, she let her feet fall back into the ground, taking the straw between her fingers and sipping. Alcohol wasn’t one of her vices, and it didn’t really do anything, but she did enjoy the occasional drink. 

[megprescott-hitter]

"Neither. I pick pocketed out of a need rather than a hobby." Meg answered. "But then I found out that I’m good at it so I also made it a habit." she glanced over at the fight and smirked. "Wow these bouncers are kinda useless, aren’t they?"

[only-parker]

That gave Parker pause - the history the words alluded to resonated with her, and Parker decided she might as well sit down. "You could go help them," she said, matter-of-factly, taking another sip, her eyes wide and suggestive over the drink. Not that she was trying to suggest anything - other than that she was. 

[blakeraymond-grifter]

Let's See What You Can Do (Parker and Blake)

[blakeraymond-grifter]

Blake raised an eyebrow faintly at Parker’s challenge as he opened the folder. He was certain he could easily find a way in, but the way he might choose to get in would no doubt be different from how Parker might get in, and couldn’t help but wonder if it might be a mark against him if he chose more of a grifter way to enter. He shrugged faintly as he turned to look at the files before him, Parker knew what his specialty was so she would probably be fine with him choosing a less than direct manner.

The next few minutes were filled with silence studying the information in front of him, only the sound of him turning pages filled the room. “I believe I’ve found a few ways in.” He said finally, turning back towards Parker. “Though only one of them will be viable in the short amount of time we have.” He smiled as he picked up one of the pages and pushed it towards, his finger pointing to a specific section on the page. “As indicated here, Bradshaw’s son has a bit of a gambling habit.” A part of Blake was against using the man’s son as a way to get to him after all hadn’t he been in somewhat similar situation that was the reverse? But he reasoned that it wasn’t as bad as the son wouldn’t really get into trouble.

"I would imagine Bradshaw has gone to great lengths to hide this from Vanquelaz as who would trust the father of a compulsive gambler with their money? So what if some of the money were to disappear? I’d imagine Bradshaw would do nearly anything to keep Vanquelaz from finding out about it."

[only-parker]

Parker lasted the first 30 seconds - but watching someone think wasn't as exciting as she hoped it would be, and eventually she slipped off the table, wandering to the window and taking a look outside. 

When she heard Blake speak up, she looked away from the blue birds who were building their nest across the street and sat back down on the table. The kid Blake was pointing to couldn't be more than 25, and she nodded - she'd go to great lengths to make sure her money was safe and sound, so that made sense. 

"You're going to use the kid to get to Bradshaw, and then leverage Bradshaw to get closer to Vanquelaz?"

Her first thought was to steal the money and pin it on the kid, but she wasn't sure that was what Blake had in mind. 

[megprescott-hitter]

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun (Parker and Meg)

[megprescott-hitter]

only-parker:

[only-parker]

Meg took her hand off of the woman’s wrist and caught the flask before it hit the ground.

"I would hope so. You wouldn’t get $10 for this flask, which is why I keep it around." she mused before narrowing her eyes. There was something familiar about this woman… but her molasses-drowning thoughts couldn’t pin point it. "So are you a klepto, or is this just playtime for you?" 

Taking a step back, Parker glanced around the place - but no one was paying attention to them, and she crossed behind the woman to lean against the bar on her other side. "Both," she answered with a grin; then it faltered, and she frowned: "Sort of. People say the first one, and I was hoping for the second but... there's only so much you can mess around before it gets boring." 

Two guys across the bar started arguing with one another, their voices escalating until they stopped abruptly, one punching the other in the face. The two bartenders were there immediately, and Parker took advantage of the distraction, leaning over the bar counter and making herself a quick drink with the rum the bartender had left there. 

"What about you?" she asked - she wouldn't believe for a second that this woman didn't have ties to some kind of crime; no way anyone not trained noticed Parker picking their pockets. Parker was leaning towards hitter, judging by that wrist long. 

Drink done, she let her feet fall back into the ground, taking the straw between her fingers and sipping. Alcohol wasn't one of her vices, and it didn't really do anything, but she did enjoy the occasional drink. 

[megprescott-hitter]

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun (Parker and Meg)

[megprescott-hitter]

Without looking up, Meg’s hand shot out from the table and grabbed the thief’s wrist, immediately twisting it into a practiced wrist lock. Throwing back one of the ice cubes and crunching on it, she looked at her flask that had previously been in her coat pocket, and was now in the fingers of a blonde woman, before raising an eyebrow.

"And where do you think you’re going with that?" she asked, finally looking up at the thief.

[only-parker]

The movement startled her a little and her free hand darted down into her jacket pocket, the taser between her fingers before she realized that she wasn't actually concerned. The gesture wasn't immediately threatening in and of itself (Eliot had shown her how to push forward while breaking the grip - it wasn't painless, even for her, but it was doable). It was just... unexpected. She hadn't really been paying attention to what her hands had been doing, and the cold regard she'd been ready to taser the lady with was replaced by curiosity. By the looks of it, she was a couple drinks in, and that just made things more interesting.

"Habit," she told her simply, her head tilting to the side, watching the redhead like one would a squirrel at the park. Her fingers released the flask, and she made no move to stop it as it fell to the ground, waiting to see if it would distract the woman enough to take her hand back. 

[megprescott-hitter]

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun (Parker and Meg)

The speed of thought is really the speed of minute electrical impulses in the nerves of the brain, which are formed via the changes in the concentrations of ions inside and outside nerve cells. This means that, approximately speaking, a thought can move 100 meters/sec, or 225 mph. However, Meg was feeling like each thought was drowning in a sea of molasses as she ordered her next drink. She had just come back from a rather butchered job, George had called in a favor, and alcohol in a place that wasn’t the 21st was needed. The place wasn’t too crowded, but it wasn’t completely empty either. Busy enough to keep the bartender from keeping track of how many drinks she had had, but slow enough for the drinks to still come in a timely manner. While waiting on her next drink, she placed the ice-filled glass against her already bruising knuckles, and grimaced slightly as the cold glass pressed against the raw skin.

[only-parker]

Even now, years later, there was something comfortable about a nice and bustling bar. The familiarity of the sounds and smells soothed the odd bout of nostalgia she was experiencing - with Nate and Sophie off in their own little world, and Hardison and Eliot back in Florida working on their projects... the first two weeks had been alright, travelling around and dropping in on the people they'd accepted into their little company, getting to know the worker bees. But now the solitude was starting to get to her; there was a time when seeing a familiar face meant danger, but now she was sort of hoping that Nate would appear at the bar, or holed away in a booth somewhere. He wasn't though - Parker had checked. 

There were, however, a dozen oblivious drunks wandering this way and that between their slightly more sober friends. For a while she occupied herself by picking their pockets and changing cards between their wallets, and their sober friend's wallets. There was a bad fake ID in a wallet she lifted from a knock-off Gucci bag, and she made sure to leave that one on the bar, where the barkeep would see it - she liked to think that Nate would've appreciated it, considering how stumble-y the girl seemed to be, the guys around her eyeing her with looks that make Parker want to stab them. 

A man sat alone in a booth by the door, and Parker watched him, wondering who he was waiting for - or if he was waiting for anyone at all. There was a woman playing darts by herself in the corner, and a guy with greasy hair who looked barely legal practising his pool shots. Parker wandered by the bar, looking to pass the time by harassing the pool player; absently her hand dipped into the coat pocket of the redhead who was there with her knuckles pressed against an ice-filled glass. Parker's fingers gripped the edges of something in the pocket, and Parker nudged the woman's shoulder with her arm as she lifted.