The Dawn Before Sunrise is The Darkest of All
Words: 6,1K
Pairing: Yoongi x Reader / You, slight Namjoon x Reader / You, Jungkook
Genre: Fluff, Angst -- back and forth timeline, breakup, Namjoon & Jungkook are muscle bros, cute Jungkook for help
Summary: Small misunderstanding leads you to big mistake. You never thought it will make you lose him. He’s gone without a goodbye. It’s a bad bye.
Playlist suggestion: RM ft eAeon - Badbye, RM - Trivia: Love, Heize ft Giri Boy (Prod SUGA) - We Don’t Talk Together, Pink Sweat$ - At My Worst
Note: I want to try something different but I’m not sure if this is a success or failure. Lol. I put small amount of angst in here, hmm maybe a little too much compare to my other writings. But yeah, I’m trying new things. And happy birthday Yoongi! What Yoongi wants what Yoongi gets!
You sigh. You stand in front of your wardrobe. There’s visible contrast between your clothes and his. You can feel the pain on your chest. For the love you let go, you live like in hell for a month. You have no reason to live right after he walks out of your life. No calls, no messages, no news from him. You hate him. But then, you worry something might happen to him more. You grab the sleeve of his long coat.
“Where’d you go?”
[January]
“Stay” Yoongi whispers with his eyes closed.
“We have to get ready”
“Ten minutes. Just stay like this for ten minutes”
You grant his wish and stay on the bed with him. You lie patiently on your back. He sleeps while facing you, hugging you on the waist.
“When we arrive at your home, I will barely hold you for the next two days”
You caress his face and he leans to you.
“They know we live together, maybe this time they will let you sleep with me instead of staying in guest room”
“Nah, your father won’t let me”
“But he likes you”
Yoongi opens his eyes. His sleepiness is gone and leaves him with laziness.
“It doesn’t mean he wants a man to sleep with his daughter under his nose”
You laugh after hearing Yoongi’s comment. He always has something to say and it hits home. Your father indeed likes Yoongi. They can talk for hours while your mom and you are preparing food. But sleeping together or showing skinship are whole different things for him.
“Did he say something to you?”
“Hmm…”
Yoongi pretends to think. You know there’s something between the two men after your last visit. Both of them seem to want it staying as secret. He supports his head with his right hand and looks at me with serious face.
“You don’t have to know”
“Ugh. Did you guys plan something fishy?”
Yoongi’s face comes closer to you. Being together for a year doesn’t make you less affected by him and his aura. Even he looks so casual and cute after waking up, your heart can’t help but to beats faster.
“Yes. We plan something fishy like fishing on the sea next month without you” he whispers while teasing you.
“No way, Dad won’t leave me behind” you whisper back to him.
“Yes way” he says before kissing you.
It starts slow and steady. The ten minutes requested by Yoongi has passed but you don’t really care. You have enough time to get ready before 1 night and 2 days trip for Lunar New Year to your parents’ home. His fingers touch your skin softly under your t-shirt.
“Yoongs”
Yoongi stops kissing you and puts smirk on his face.
“We should stop, right? We can’t let your parents waiting” he says before kissing your forehead and gets up. You can hear his laugh when he walks away.
“Min Yoongi!”
You stay on your bed, looking at the ceiling. Somehow, you feel more tired after waking up. You may expertise in taking a deep breath now. It helps you holding in your tears. Your phone ringing shatters your scrambling thoughts. You don’t want to let your hope up but deep inside, you pray you’ll hear something from him in every single call or text anyone made to you.
“Hey, you’re awake?”
“Hmm. Any good news?”
You hear nothing for two seconds before he answers. You know he carefully picks his words.
“I’m sorry but I have nothing for that. But Mom tells you to come today. Dad just bought a fresh tuna this morning, randomly. So, we’ll have sushi party”
“Joon, I-“
“This is a compulsory, no refusal is accepted. I’ll come at ten so get yourself a good bath and breakfast”
“Okay, thanks Joon”
“It’s nothing. See you”
You’re not moving from your previous position for another 5 minutes before getting ready. You look at your pictures with Yoongi, smiling widely to each other.
“I miss you”
On the other side, Namjoon exhale a deep breath. He massages his temple. Honestly, it pains him to see you like this. You look soulless and pale, your smile never reaches your eyes. He keeps you on his watch because he’s worry, because no Yoongi is around for you. He sips on his morning coffee and open the message app. There’s one particular message that he keeps coming back to.
N: Do you love her?
Y: I do. You know I love her more than anything, even my own life
N: Then stop torturing her
N: If you can’t make her happy, I will.
*
Namjoon smiles when he sees you. He hugs you when you arrive at his car. He’s the one who knows the whole story between Yoongi and you.
“Come on, the tuna is waiting” he says, making you smile.
You and Namjoon are friends for the last 3 years. Joining the book club at the city library might be the best decision you made that year because you met Joon there. You were amazed at his choice on books and the thoughts after reading it. You always know he is the smartest man you’ve met. He surprises you more when he said he also makes music and writes his own lyrics. There’s no such thing as a perfect man in real life, it’s only happened in drama. But then Namjoon exists to prove you wrong.
You spent more time with Joon outside the book club. He treated you so well like the gentleman he was. After knowing each other for a year, he often took you to his studio. Just when you thought you have a crush on him, you met Yoongi. Joon were working on collaboration projects with two talented artists, Hoseok and Yoongi. You saw it somewhere in the online community website that the infamous three rappers would do a collaboration series by spoiler from RM. It was definitely huge thing and everyone was waiting with high expectation. As you figured that Joon was RM, you notice that Hoseok was J-Hope and Yoongi was SUGA. After that, you often met them at Joon’s studio and got closer.
“So, Mom and Dad are trying to be Japanese sushi chefs right now, with Jungkook as their assistant. Basically, they trust Jungkook and his youtube’s manual”
You laugh with him. You can imagine the situation of his parent’s house right now.
“He’ll be saying ‘you can trust me on this’ while watching how to slice tuna belly on youtube”
“That’s exactly what happened”
You feel thankful to Namjoon. He’s not giving you the pity looks that you’ve got from others. He’s the first person you ask when Yoongi went missing. But Yoongi is not in Joon’s studio or home. You also come to Hoseok’s place but he’s just as clueless as you.
*
“Welcome! Welcome!” shouts Jungkook when you step inside the house. You can’t help but laugh at him. Mr. & Mrs. Kim come out from the kitchen and strike a pose with Jungkook. They wear similar scarf on their head and black apron on their waist. You clap your hand excitedly and make them feel proud.
“Let’s move to the dining table before Jungkook eats them all. He keeps making excuses that the cutting line is not good enough before dump them to his mouth”
“Mom, I want to give Y/N noona the best sushi only”
“Do you believe that?” asks Joon to you.
“I highly doubt it”
Your answer makes Jungkook looks at you with his large doe eyes. Before he can protest, Mr. Kim rushes us to go and get ready to eat.
Y/N noona is fine. Looks tired but still fine. Hope you’re here with us.
Message sent
[D-30]
You sit lazily on his sofa, seeing he works hard through his back. You can hear him humming to his new song. You smile to yourself, enjoying this Yoongi. When you come to his studio, he always let you to hang around. He will ask your opinion to the music he made, but it’s never love songs. You, once, asked him why he never let you hear any of his love songs. You remember he smiled.
‘Remember when I accidentally stand behind you when you write? What did you do then?’
‘I tell you to not look because it’s not finished yet and… I’m too shy to let you, the source of my idea watching me work’
‘That works the same with my love songs. I can’t present it to you unfinished’
He is working on his mixtape which will be released a month from now. He wants it to be perfect so he does it very carefully.
“Babe”
“Hm?”
“Aren’t you hungry?”
“Just order the food and eat here, okay? I’ll be finished soon” he says. But he has been saying the same thing for an hour and half now.
“Okay, but you’ll have to eat with me”
“I can’t, baby. I’ll eat later”
You stand and walk to him. He has no intention to get rest even for a minute. You know this is very important for him, but you don’t like to see him having lack of sleep. You know he’s been skipping meals on most days but he won’t tell you that.
“Stop skipping meals… at least when I am here, will you?” you say, almost whispering. You want him to do as you say but you don’t want to argue with him. Not when he needs much time to focus.
His fingers stop working. He sighs and turns his attention to me. He looks tired.
“I’ll try my best to eat and sleep between the breaks, okay?”
He tries to reassure you and you can only nod.
“I know Joon snitching to you, but he’s just exaggerating”
Yoongi stands up and opens his arms for you. You settle yourself on his embrace. He’s the one who sets you in worry, but he’s also the one who can put you at ease. Yoongi is your person. You never feel this way with other people including your exes. He is special.
“Let’s just go home, then eat and cuddle. I can always overtime start tomorrow anyway”
You just give him your bright smile as approval and making him showing you his gummy smile. You always think you are perfect for each other.
Sera waves her hand in front of you, pulling you back to the current time. The time with no Yoongi around you, the time that pains you much.
“Eat more, okay?”
“I will”
You take another spoon of rice and continue to eat. Your colleagues resume the conversation. You try to keep up with them and give responses.
“Will Namjoon pick you up again today?” ask Hyojoon.
“No, he’s busy. Why, you miss him already?” tease you to her. She blushes and it looks cute to you.
“It’s not like that” defends her.
You and Sera laugh, satisfied with her reaction.
“It’s fine. Namjoon is attractive man, it’s very normal to put your interest in him. I can promote him to you all day long if you want”
“Y/N~”
They know about Yoongi and they always try to help you in any way. Sometimes you can feel their pity but they try their best to hide it. You still feel grateful to have them.
“But honestly Y/N, have you and Namjoon, you know, crush on each other?” asks Sera.
“I think I admire him a lot since early of our friendship. But I don’t think we have that romantic feeling”
“Hmm you sure?” asks Hyojoon.
“Why are you asking? You really like Namjoon, huh?”
“I… I find him very attractive but I always feel he looks at you differently so…”
You only smile before responding to her.
“I have Yoongi, don’t you remember?”
[D-15]
Two weeks flies so fast for Yoongi, but feels so long for you. You barely meet him while living under the same roof. He is back when you sleep. Sometimes, you both greet each other in the morning, on the way to work for you and sleep for Yoongi. Other times, you don’t even talk. Yoongi often goes back to home looks annoyed. You can see his frustration and sour mood. He tells you to visit him less because he needs his full attention on his work. And now, he’s been sleeping on the studio for 3 days straight. You prepare his clothes and some snack so he can focus on working because you know how precious music for him. You want the best for him even though it may hurt you in the process.
You are a meter away from his studio’s door when it’s suddenly opened. You see Suran going out.
“Oh, Y/N!” Suran greets you cheerily, then hugs you.
“How are you, onni?” you ask. It’s been long time to see her after Yoongi’s first mixtape. You envy her for being great singer and work together with your boyfriend.
“I’m busy, but not as busy as your man”
We both laugh as knowing how Yoongi is.
“Are you working for this mixtape too?”
She shakes his head, and then stands closer to me.
“Yoongi is working another song for me, it will be on my album. But this is top secret so…”
She pretends to zip her mouth and asks me to do the same. She, then, cups my face and look at me so dearly.
“You’re so cute. Now, I won’t take your time, go lovey dovey with the lover boy”
You just laugh then wave at her. You punch the code of his studio’s door and come in.
“Do you leave something behind, noona?” ask Yoongi with bright tones. The tones that you haven’t heard for days.
You just stand there with a backpack of Yoongi’s clothes and other bag full of snacks. You try processing the studio’s appearance. You spot his jacket on the chair next to him, blanket on the sofa, cans of beer on the table with lipstick stain on some. To mistaken you for another woman mean you’re not the only girl who knows his password. The password he used to keep as secret.
As I’m not answering his question, he looks back and finds me standing awkwardly.
“Oh, you came? I’m thinking of coming home early today”
You try to be calm and not to dwell on things that might be not happened.
“Baby, are you okay?”
You put both of your luggage down. The tears are pooling on your eyes, threatening to fall. You can see Yoongi walks to you and you unconsciously take one step back. He stops and be on alert.
“I…”
Your voice won’t come out. The tears speak for you instead. Yoongi takes another step closer. You hold out your hand, telling him to stop. You really don’t want to hurt him with your harsh words when you can’t even think.
“I didn’t do anything that would hurt you, please don’t doubt me”
You try to stop the tears and listen to him but you’re too hurt to do that.
“We have to talk, I’ll answer all of your questions but you won’t listen to anything now”
Yoongi knows you very well. You both know you’re holding each other rage hidden to save this relationship. Fire and water. Yoongi is used to cool the hot-headed me down at most times. He puts my fire away when it becomes bigger and brings danger. But this time, it seems different. You can forgive anything but not cheating. You mention this to Yoongi on your early days together.
You look at him in the eyes, tears keep streaming down your face. You can see worry on his face but his jaw tense as if he’s angry. Is it your fault? Aren’t you allowed to be jealous?
“I’m going” you say walking back to the door.
“Y/N”
His voice stops your hand from turning the door’s handle. He sighs and speaks slowly.
“I’m not coming home tonight, or until you want to listen to my side of story”
You choose to leave him. You choose to not listen to him. The person who understands you the most, who loves you the most. You know you’ll regret it once you clear your head but your ego is too big to realize. You’re out of his studio without looking back.
You stare blankly at your window. The lights from the others buildings and houses feel so far today. You wonder, is Yoongi in one of them? Is he okay? Is he… happy? Single tear escapes your eye. You don’t want to give up on him, you don’t want to let him go. But if letting him away from you brings him happiness then you have no other options.
You sigh. Your phone buzz, a message from Jungkook comes.
Noona, hyung is coming back
(Heize Returns with “We Don’t Talk Together” Produced by SUGA and Featuring Giri Boy)
You open the news link as fast as you can. You read the whole article in seconds.
“You’re alive. You’re okay. Thanks God”
Your emotion is coming out at once. The relief, happiness, sadness, rage, and other unidentified emotions are becoming one. Your mental can’t bear all of them so you’re breaking down. You’re crying hard. It’s even harder than the day you fail university exam in your mother’s arms.
“Why don’t you say anything? At least read my messages. I’m worried to death, Yoongi”
You open the messages you sent to him. All of them are left unread, even until now. The world may not know what happened, but Yoongi has been missing from your world, from your life.
You keep crying until you tired and sleep on the sofa. You don’t know that the number 1 on your message has gone. Yoongi read all of your message while you are sleeping.
Namjoon’s thumb hovers over the call button. He wants to check Y/N’s condition after seeing the news. Heize is a big singer in the industry so it’s impossible to Y/N not knowing this. Part of him feels guilty for being greedy over her, but he just hate to see her being like this. He searches another name on his contact and dial the number.
“Let’s meet”
“Yeah, I have something to talk too”
“Where do you want to meet, Yoongi?”
Jungkook slams the door open. He looks at her brother with rage. How can his brother pretend to not knowing anything about Yoongi’s whereabout to Y/N when he knows everything. As he lives together with his brother for a year now, he becomes close to his friends. He knows his brother treats Y/N differently but he never think of another reason than Y/N is the only woman on their group. He’s sure his brother has another motive now. Is Namjoon crushing on Y/N? Is he the one who makes them separated? How can he stand seeing Y/N hurt like that? Jungkook keeps trying to contact Yoongi’s phone but it always fails.
“Explain to me, no excuses”
“Okay, but you need to calm down and sit”
Namjoon take a deep breath before explaining everything to his little brother. Jungkook respects him a lot as brother and musician, but he also see Yoongi as his mentor in music.
“Y/N and Yoongi got into big fight two weeks before D-2 was released. Yoongi stressed about the album, thought fight wasn’t really necessary. But Y/N thought Yoongi didn’t care about her and choose to shut her out from his life”
Jungkook listens intently, he doesn’t want to miss anything.
“It was just misunderstanding but it was critical for their relationship. Suran explained it to Y/N as she was the key of the fight but at that time Yoongi has gone missing.”
“But I work in the same industry, I know he’s there. I get his new number from the company. He comes to see Y/N from a far sometimes. But I don’t want to be involved further in their relationship”
“I loved Y/N, I did. I always tried to impress her, to make her laugh. But that was before she met Yoongi. The time I see twinkle in her eyes when she saw Yoongi, I knew the game is over”
“Is it really over, hyung?”
“I thought it would. I promised myself to be her bestfriend wherever she needs me. But when Yoongi gone and seeing her world broke apart, I couldn’t just sit and watch her”
Jungkook remembers the last song his brother release 6 months ago. The love song named Trivia: Love. The project collaboration with Hoseok and Yoongi. He still loves her. The feeling doesn’t stop in the past. It’s growing without his brother knowing.
I’m just human. You erode all my corners and make me into love.
Though the distance between I and U is long
F*** JKLMNOPQRST
I crossed all the letters and reached you
Look, mine and yours also sound the same
Though that doesn’t make me you,
I’d like to be a part of your book
I’d like to get involved in your novel
as your lover
“Why is my genius brother becoming an idiot?” ask Jungkook.
Namjoon just laughs. He thanks Jungkook in his head as he’s no longer mad. To be honest, Jungkook is his biggest supporter to keep doing music. If Jungkook turns his back to him, he thinks he can’t go far.
“I’ll talk to Yoongi. I’ll make sure he gives what Y/N deserve to get”
*
Yoongi sits in the meeting room with Heize, Giri Boy and marketing team members. They monitor the public response after the collaboration articles are out. One screen shows the comments on news portal and the other shows view numbers and live comments on the music video. The feedback is super positive and it brings relief to the team. Yoongi feels proud to himself. There’s one particular person he wants to share this feeling right now. Someone important in his life that is even more important than the life itself.
“The mixtape is getting the attention too, that’s great” says the head of marketing team. Yoongi offers them his shy smile.
“Exposure is indeed great, but I hope they like the music”
“I’m sure they will. This is Min SUGA PD we’re talking about” says Heize that supported by others.
“If this keeps going up, then we should really make another project” adds the manager.
“Okay. Let’s wrap it up now and schedule the team dinner on the next Friday”
The meeting is dismissed and Yoongi rushes to go to somewhere. He prepares himself for the worst but he won’t give up. He can’t give up. He will hold her hand until the end. He will run after her. He won’t do the same mistake. He arrives at the park not far from his old studio. Namjoon is there, waiting for him. Namjoon is his bestfriend but he is also Y/N’s. He will understand if Namjoon wants to beat him to death.
“Joon”
“Yoongs”
“I’m sorry I’m being a jerk this past month, but I… I can’t let her go. I can’t give her to you”
“I know”
[D-Day]
You keep monitoring Yoongi’s agency updates for his mixtape. Today, the countdown is supposed to be D-2. Two days before you can finally meet Yoongi and talk about everthing. You know your close friends are aware that something happened between you and Yoongi but you think it will be okay soon. You sleep less, hoping to see him coming through the door. You endlessly open and close your phone, waiting for his text or call.
You get new notification, informing the newest mixtape is out now. It’s quite a surprise but it means good news. You can meet Yoongi sooner than you expect. Out of happiness, you try to call him. This will be the first call after the fight, after two weeks.
“Please answer the call”
“The number you are calling-“
You keep trying to call him but you keep connected to his mailbox. You send some messages but no response. You try, and then you wait. You keep doing it, but you can’t reach him. You grab you purse and leave the home.
You stand in front of his studio. The bad memories come back at you. You push the pass code slowly, thinking Yoongi is inside. Thinking that you can finally meet him makes you nervous. The door is open and you rush yourself to go in. But no one’s there. No Yoongi, not even his equipment. He’s gone.
Yoongi arrives at the park not far from his old studio. Namjoon is there, waiting for him. Namjoon is his bestfriend but he is also Y/N’s. He will understand if Namjoon wants to beat him to death.
“Joon”
“Yoongs”
“I’m sorry I’m being a jerk this past month, but I… I can’t let her go. I can’t give her to you”
“I know”
“I really want to punch you when I see your text, but I don’t want to start a game that I know I’m going to lose. I should’ve gone to the gym with you and Hoseok back then”
Namjoon shakes his head and smile.
“The feeling is mutual. I stop myself from beating you up because I don’t want her to hate me more than she hates you”
They both laugh. They are brother after all.
“Thank you for being there for her. I’m ashamed to admit this but I don’t deserve her. I see how she’s not being herself and it pains me”
“She’s not giving up on you”
“I know and that’s why I want to come back with a better version of me. So I can tell people that I deserve her, I can give her happiness”
“You include me in that ‘people’ category?” Namjoon asks.
“Number 1 on the list” Yoongi answers with laugh.
Both of them sit in the silence. Too many things come across their minds. This will be the closure for Namjoon’s unrequited love, while new beginning for Yoongi.
“Just don’t do the same mistake, Yoongs. I’ll take her from you if this shit happens in the future and you, you’ll be the one who can’t see and hear anything from her”
“I swear I won’t repeat the same mistake so you can go and fall in love with someone else, not mine”
*
You open your eyes. The sun has risen so high to remind you another day has come. You thank God when realize that today is Saturday. You can avoid people from your workplace curiosity about your puffy eyes. You look at your phone screen. You really want to call him again but you’re afraid of the failure this time. You turn it on and open the lock. Almost every one you know sends you message but nothing from him. You have no energy to cry, so you just put it back and leave to the bathroom.
An hour later, you sit on your sofa again with you light lunch. You remember Namjoon always reminds you that whatever happens you have to stuff your mouth with food even when you don’t want to. You don’t aware that your phone continuously vibrates.
“Jungkook?”
“Noona, you’re home?”
“Yeah. Whats wrong? Are you… are you running?” you ask. Jungkook laugh and you hear his rush steps.
“Noona, meet me in front of your apartment. Hurry up! We don’t have much time”
“Hey, JK. If it’s one of your pranks I won’t fall for it”
“Noooo. I don’t do pranks again. Please believe me and come down”
You really have no energy to do anything yet Jungkook asking you to go out. You grab the black cardigan and layer it on your white t-shirt. It’s ends of June already but you always feel cold. Your wear glasses to hide your eyes. You bring your small bag and phone to meet Jungkook. If it’s nothing important, you swear you will give him a long speech. No more ‘I’ll forgive you because you’re cute’ again.
He brings you to the brunch café nearby. The café you used to visit with Yoongi. The last visit must be three months ago, when everything was still okay.
“Why we’re here?” you ask Jungkook who focuses on menu book. He doesn’t answer your question but calling the waiter. He orders 5 main dishes with 1 dessert.
“I want to try the dishes you recommend to me”
“All of them?”
“Yes, I can eat them all in one sitting. Besides, I have you here, so I have no worry on my plate”
“I’ve had my lunch” you say. Jungkook rises an eyebrow.
“Are you considering cereal with milk as your lunch? Oh please, noona. As the cereal mania, I’m offended”
You only laugh because you’ve got caught. You indeed just eat cereal for living these days.
Jungkook keeps babbling and you can only smile. You listen to his story and it does help to enlighten you. The food is coming one by one. When the last plate is placed, he cocks his head and look at you with his sparkling deer eyes. He asks me to eat with him and not to only watch him eating.
“Did you listen to the new song?” he asks. You stop for a while before looking at him.
“I slept early last night and woke up late”
“Would you listen to it?” he asks carefully.
You don’t answer his question and play with the food. You’re not sure if it’s the best choice to do.
“Would you give it a chance, noona?”
He begs to you with his eyes. He holds your hand, giving you strength to go on.
“I’ll be here. I’ll help you with anything”
Jungkook gives his phone and airpods to me. He encourages me to listen to it while he’s here with me. I take few deep breaths before click the play button.
I’m sorry, was I too harsh?
I’m way too fearless
I don’t know, I don’t know
Maybe I thought you’d comfort me
So I played hard to get
But when you’re not here
Everything crashes down
So with a blank face
I built a house
My footsteps are getting heavier
I can’t walk anymore
I can’t just let you go like this
But I can’t open my mouth
You listen to his melody. You listen to his lyrics. His song speaks to you. The key in relationship is communication but both you and Yoongi have failed. You two try to be considerate for the other person but it only pushes you away farther from each other. You look up at Jungkook, he gives you reassuring smile.
*
You’re back to the scariest place for you. His studio. Jungkook holds your shoulder from the back. You don’t realize that you are trembling. Your body remember the pain and it scares you.
“Everything will be okay” chants Jungkook repeatedly to make you believe him.
Your hand is still trembling and puts the code one by one. You remember what Suran tolds you.
‘We all know Yoongi is deeply in love with you so we kind of guessing his password. Then he officially tells everyone who is in the mixtape project including me for easy access. I’m sorry Y/N, I really am’
The door is open. Jungkook gives you another soft pat, supports you from behind. You take a step inside. You hear low sound of music. You can smell very familiar scent filling the room. All the equipment and decorations back to the room. You can see a figure sits on the chair looking at the monitor. You hold your breath. You’re scared that all of this is just your sweet dream.
“Y-Yoongi”
The man turns around. He smiles. Yoongi looks paler than the last time you saw him. His face looks thinner, dark circles appear more visible than before. He stands and walks to you.
“You came?”
“You’re here. You’re really here”
“I’m here. I will never leave again”
You really don’t want to cry. You’re tired for all the crying you did these months. He opens his arms widely, ready to embrace you again. He regrets to ever think leaving you will make you happier. He is in deep resentment to think he can live normally without you beside him.
“I’m sorry” says Yoongi softly. You hug him tight, you’re afraid he will disappear to thin air.
“No, I’m sorry”
Yoongi lifts my face to look at him.
“It takes me too long to be confident in being your boyfriend. I punish myself for being a fool to hurt you like that. But I just hurt you more”
“I shouldn’t doubt you that day. I can’t bear myself with the thought of losing you”
“I’m sorry, Y/N, I should’ve told you everything. Do you forgive me?”
You nod and hug him again.
“We make mistake, but we learn from it. We will make a new beginning and be together forever”
*
Yoongi fills you in for the days he absents from your life. How he tried to focus on finishing the mixtape album, how he gave all the best that he can for Heize new song, how he barely lived without you. You don’t miss the chance to punch his arms or chest whenever you think he’s an idiot. He takes it all, he thinks he deserves more than just light punch from you.
“Honestly, I’m afraid that you won’t take me back. That you start to think Joon is better than me”
“Hey!” you slap his chest. He laughs.
“I trust you but I don’t trust Joon. He had crush on you before you meet me, you know. If we didn’t meet, maybe he is the best person for you to be with”
“It’s all in the past, right? I hope Joon meet someone who loves him sincerely”
Yoongi pulls you to him, pastes your back to his chest. He hugs you tight and doesn’t answer your question. He is actually very scared to lose Y/N to his bestfriend. He doesn’t want you to know that Namjoon is still crushing on you. He, once, thinks that Namjoon loves you as much as he does.
He kisses your temple every time you stop talking. You find it cute and crave him more. You turn your head to him and kiss him on the lips. He just smiles.
“I miss you”
“I miss you more”
“Not sure about that. I miss you more than you miss me”
You love this Yoongi. No, you just love Yoongi and being with Yoongi, whatever side or color of him he shows to you.
“Can I meet your parents tomorrow?”
“My parents? Why?”
You fully turn your body to him. You feel nervous and nausea waiting for him answer. You are the fire and he is the water. When you easily pop small tantrums, Yoongi is very calm and gives you another insight.
“I need to talk to them, it’s very important”
“Should I, I don’t know, prepare something or anything?”
“No. Your presence is enough”
*
You finally sleep in peace. No more nightmares or waking up in the middle of the nights. You sleep so comfortably with Yoongi beside you. Both of you made a promise last night, to communicate better so you can understand each other better too. You promise to yourself, to not give in to your negative thoughts. You leave Yoongi who sleep soundly to make breakfast.
You inform your parents about your arrival. Your mom and dad are home, waiting for you and Yoongi. You can see Yoongi is more nervous than usual. You think that he may still blame himself and feel guilty to your parents. As much as your parents love you and be very protective, they won’t interfere your love live. They fully give the freedom to you.
You sit with Yoongi in front of your father after settling the drinks for the four of you. Your mother only smiles, while your father gives his scary face. Yoongi sit politely with his two hands upon his knees.
“Have you thought about it?” asks your father.
“Yes, sir”
You look back and forth between Yoongi and your father. This is the secret, the one that you asked Yoongi before. There’s indeed something between the men that you don’t know. You steal a glance to your mom, asking for the hint. Seems like you’re the only person who clueless.
“Then?”
“Please give your daughter’s hands to me. I may make mistake and being stupid but I will make her happy as long as she stays with me”
Your eyes go wide. You open your mouth just to close it again. You have so many things to say yet you can’t say anything. Your father smiles, half smirking, to Yoongi.
“Take you long enough, son”
