Bona Fide Warlock of Sonic Drive-In @opaltithe - Tumblr Blog

bisexualgambit

Job interviewer: So what are your qualifications for this position?

Me:

elsaspants

Isadora is a lesbian

val-ritz

Robes are stupid. My sorcerer dresses like Petyr Baelish.

val-ritz

To expand: if you are a mage, dress like a noble. Do not dress like a wizard. Pointy conical hat and sky-blue robes is medieval semaphore for “kill first and with extreme prejudice.” Tailored black silk over cloth-of-gold and studded with rubies says “Harmless, but valuable; ransom if possible or kill last.”

If you dress like a noble, they’re not going to pay attention as you take a turn or two to back away from the melee and prepare yourself. The ruse is only broken when you reveal yourself, at which point 8d6 fire damage is screaming toward them at Mach Fuck anyway, so no big.

humoristics

largeocin

small ruby and nan from earlier in math class

im sneakie.

im clever.

im shiftie.

im goblin.

And?

and im comin.

westfailia-deactivated20240822

terfs have completely fallen for the lie that cis dudes will claim to be girls to get into girls bathrooms and toilets. have you meet a straight cis dude? they think touching laundry makes them gay, they think drinks in bright colours make them gay, they think ponytails make them gay, they won’t pretend to be a trans woman, trust me.

closet-keys

seriously..

related– The idea that straight men would go through major life changes and endanger themselves and change their lifestyle completely just to hit on lesbians is so ridiculous. No straight man is going to pretend to be a trans woman because they already do that shit all the time, why put in all that effort towards doing something they already do with no effort at all? Like trust me, actual straight men have no problem feeling entitled to hit on lesbians just the way they are.

angrydykeprince-deactivated2016

I think the funniest part about twefs thinking that this will happen is the idea that a door or some social expectation will stop a cishet man who wants to hurt women in a public restroom. Get fucking real. If that was true women would be totally safe in women’s bathrooms and guess what we aren’t.

closet-keys

^^^^^^^^^

akunohomu

Overwatch parodies by Kyoute

just-shower-thoughts

Heat, Pressure, and Time. The three things that make a diamond, are also the three things that make a waffle.

13242567-deactivated20210306

–Leslie Knope

thisisalsoyou

message

faeriefountain

Designing a Widowmaker Skin where she never became an agent of talon and started training with Ana to avenge Gerard after he was assassinated by Talon. Recolor might be blackwatch themed but that might be too similar to noire widowmaker

faeriefountain

visor wouldn’t move but project hard light like this

faeriefountain

omg i didn’t expect this to clear like 20 notes, thank you guys so much for the overwhelmingly positive response!! Really looking forward to finishing this one, now!!

chongoblog

Visit Original Link

Caught in a rather good romance

slightlyfrumiousbandersnatch-de

It sounds like I’m playing a video game and someone is trying to sell me potions. :D

ailurinae

…that is exactly what it sounds like

kieu-silly-world

Hisoka: Illumi~ Can I have your number?

Illumi: *visibly texting* I don’t have a phone.

ganymedesclock

Something I think is interesting is if you consider Warp Tour through The Return from Peridot’s perspective, it’s a little bit like…

Imagine you’re working in a good-sized office building. It has a basement, but it’s always locked and you’ve never been there. One day your boss hands you the keys, tells you there’s a fax machine down there, and asks you to go see if it’s working.

You head into the basement, and it’s really creepy down there. There’s weird graffiti on the walls and like… mysterious arrangements of paperclips that you have no idea who put them there or why. But you are here, you have a job to do, you are good at your job, you are finding that fax machine.

And then suddenly a bunch of people you have never seen before jump out of nowhere, strike poses, rattle off some kind of motto and start attacking you.

You book it back up the stairs and lock the door behind you, because, holy crap, there are people living in the basement, why did no one tell you about this. And naturally the first thing you do is blab to Security and by Security I mean that one ex-Navy Seal with all the tattoos who’s built like she wrestles grizzly bears in her spare time and somehow ended up on security detail in an office building right here at this point in your life when ordinary security will not suffice, because sometimes the corporate gods are merciful.

And not only does she believe you, but she just sorta looks you over and goes “oh, yeah, those guys. I know who those guys are. Let’s go, I’ve got some unfinished business with them.”

And then to make situations way weirder there’s some other person who shows up around this time who has apparently been held hostage by the basement people for longer than you’ve been working here and she’s deeply alarmed by the phone system and she comes along even though she really doesn’t want to because you have Security on your side and Security probably benches I-beams, and you are totally confident you are going to kick these basement-lurking weirdos’ butts.

And then the whole situation goes rapidly downhill and then before you know it you’ve been indoctrinated into the basement cult.