You really have a terrible attitude.
Thanks babe 😘
Noah Kahan
Cosmic Funnies

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Janaina Medeiros
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ

oozey mess
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ellievsbear

Product Placement
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Origami Around
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Discoholic 🪩
🩵 avery cochrane 🩵
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@otome-reviews
You really have a terrible attitude.
Thanks babe 😘
IkeSen: Date Masamune Dramatic Route Review [SPOILERS]
I’d been reading quite a few batshit insane routes (cough Hanzo) by the time I got around to doing this wild guy’s route, so tbh throughout the whole thing I was waiting for the other shoe to drop. Was he going to be revealed as a serial killer? Would his pet tiger accidentally maul MC?
Have no fear, my friends. This guy is as normal as it gets...for otome, anyways.
Summary: Masasume integrates himself into MC’s life at breakneck speed, threatening her at sword-point to confirm she’s a time traveler, setting up pranks for MC to acclimate herself to the Sengoku era... you know, the usual. Their romance develops just as quickly, and by Episode 2, they’ve kissed! Too bad Masamune isn’t really into the whole commitment/labels thing (“there’s nothing simpler to me. If I see someone cute, I want to kiss them”).
What he is into: moving fast, cooking, making sure people are alive by touching them (!), fighting powerful enemies, and sacrificing anyone and everyone in the name of Oshu (he almost stabs MC at some point in an effort to get at Yuki at some point. Long story). Needless to say, those last two points don’t really sit too well with our resident pacifist MC, but as time goes by, our couple learns to understand each other. MC even learns how to shoot a gun, because being willing to shoot to kill is a survival skill Masamune insists MC must have in order to participate in the war against the Uesugi-Takeda alliance.
This proves to be a major plot point for MC and Masamune’s relationship development. Because at the critical moment, Masamune realizes that he doesn’t want MC to have to kill another person (now where have I heard that before??). He doesn’t want her to “lose that smile.” Cute from a romantic perspective, but tbh, I didn’t love this subplot. IkeSen MC’s naive pacifism is already my least favorite part of her character, so having Masamune enable it in the war-torn Sengoku era was irritating and unrealistic, to say the least!
That said, the relationship development between MC and Masamune past the gun incident is super cute, for the most part. When Masamune decides to go for something, he goes all in, and his relationship with MC is no exception. Despite his free-spirited nature, he decides to go exclusive with MC really quickly. And their relationship gets pretty intense (“The only place I’m allowed to die is by your side”). Masamune’s Dramatic ending indeed has quite a bit of external drama, and afaik, is the only route in which Sasuke decides to leave the Sengoku era forever! So that was an interesting twist. It also had some internal drama with MC getting jealous of Masamune potentially kissing other girls, which was less interesting.
I don’t think there was a single episode in this route where there wasn’t something kind of crazy going on. So in that regard, I did enjoy this route, even if I didn’t love all the romantic subplots (see: pacifism, jealousy). And what about Masamune himself? As someone who’s decidedly ambivalent about the bad boy trope, I wasn’t expecting to like him all that much, but this guy definitely grew on me! I did think his fixation on “looking cool” was kind of silly, but his “bad boy”-ness is fortunately vastly overstated, haha. Also, he is such a total sweetheart in the relationship.
In a universe full of some super strong and amazing personalities, it can be a little difficult for a warlord to differentiate himself, but I think Masamune holds his own. Overall, I thought his route was decent, and definitely a great starter route for those new to the IkeSen universe. He’s a fun and nice guy, and his route really reflects that well!
Choice quotes “Recklessly charging a man bare-handed, able to sleep out in the open without a care—and she insists she’s not a fighter? She’s the boldest woman I’ve ever seen.” “I’ll be waiting for you. I’ll be waiting forever. And if we see each other again, next time, I won’t let you go.”
Personality: 7.5/10: I can’t really say he’s my type (especially the wanting to look cool bit), but Masamune is definitely fun and likable!
Appearance: 9/10. Eye patch, dark hair. Very handsome! ❤
MC: 4/10. MC’s pacifism is so unsuited for the Sengoku era. At least she’s aware of that fact. Also her jealousy arc...ugh
Plot/Payoff: 7.5/10. I wasn’t really fond of a few of the romantic subplots, but in general everything was fast paced an exciting!
Personal enjoyment: 7.5/10. A really fun read! Highly recommend if you’ve never read IkeSen before.
Masterlist
Star Crossed Myth: Scorpio Route Review [SPOILERS]
I’ve been avoiding reviewing Star-Crossed Myth so far, because...I’m conflicted. The premise is downright idiotic. The characters themselves are almost all super problematic. ...But they’re also really hot. And I usually end up liking their stories by the end, anyways. So what’s a girl to do?! :)
Look. I cannot understate how dumb the premise is. Long story short, MC is a single woman who lives a peaceful life as a planetarium employee. Until one day, six incredibly egotistical and arrogant gods, representing half the zodiac, crash into her life (quite literally). They’ve been banished from the heavens for various sins, and as a reincarnated goddess, MC’s the only one who can help them (she’s supposed to have “stars in her eyes,” I shit you not). And poor MC gets strong-armed/bullied into helping one of them out, for no personal gain.
...So that’s the premise. Some of these gods have major sexual consent issues. Thankfully, Scorpio, who MC picks in this current route, isn’t one of them. He’s “just” a massive asshole. He calls her “filthy human” and “stupid woman” repeatedly (she’s upgraded to just “woman” later in the story...). He pins her arms against the wall at some point to interrogate her slash “subdue the enemy,” which I *think* is supposed to be sexy?! Oh, and he’s a total misanthrope (“To be perfectly clear, I hate all humans...and that includes you”).
Which is kind of hilarious, because midway through the story, we learn that Scorpio himself used to be a human - the only human ever converted to godhood, in fact. His tragic background as a child assassin makes him uniquely suited to dole out judgements from Department of Punishments. And MC, bless her naive little heart, finds the whole thing horrifying. When Scorpio exposes an embezzling politician, she sympathizes for said politician. When they encounter a crazy murderous dude with a knife, she doesn’t want Scorpio to kill the guy.
I don’t follow MC’s idealistic way of thinking at all. But her Pollyanna attitude does provide the impetus for Scorpio’s eventual change of heart towards humans. It takes a kidnapping to get there, but hey, what’s romance without some drama along the way? Scorpio’s Blessed and Forbidden endings are both pretty great, if drastically different from one another (“I’ll always take care of you, no matter what” vs “Don’t ever think you can get away from me. Because if you even try, I’ll give you a punishment that words can’t even describe,” lmao).
TBH, I surprised myself a little with how much I did eventually end up enjoying Scorpio and his route, given how much of an asshole he was for most of the story. It helps that his general mean-ness isn’t gendered, and applies towards all humans, I guess?! Also, his turnaround by the end of the story was super impressive, which probably means this guy has some truly epic sequel stories. And finally, let’s be real: I have totally been taking in by his annoyingly pretty face (speaking of pretty faces, hi Zyglavis here’s my number?!)
At the end of the day, Star-Crossed Myth remains one of the most ridiculous titles I’ve read to date. But its romances and its hot guys are super legit. And if you like assholes with a heart of gold, this route is definitely for you. :)
Personality: 5/10. This guy hates everyone!! I sense that his grumpy ass is gonna be wayyy better in his sequels though, and I’ll probably give it a shot one day. I have a feeling he’s gonna grow on me.
Appearance: 8/10. 4/10 when he’s got that bitchy evil grin on his face, but his CG’s are a solid 10/10 so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ (also, gloves are my kryptonite)
MC: 5/10. MC thinks pacifism is the solution to all problems. It’s kind of naive. What I did enjoy reading: her thirsting over Scorpio’s hot bod.
Plot/Payoff: 7/10. The second half of the story is way better than the first.
Personal enjoyment: 8/10. A bit of a trashy, guilty pleasure read. ^_^
Masterlist
Dream Days in West Tokyo: Ichigo Route Review [SPOILERS]
Going through my crazy long backlog of Love365 otome route notes :) Anyways, Dream Days in West Tokyo isn’t really your typical sexy otome love story, since all the characters are in high school. So maybe it’s simply geared for a younger audience, but yours truly is on the wrong side of 20...
Basically, Dream Days in West Tokyo is a charming and slow paced story about a young girl who moves back to her hometown after 10 years away, and her reunion with the local boys she used to play with. Among these boys is Ichigo: a mean and grumpy, if generally well-intentioned son of a pastry chef who’s been “secretly” in love with MC since childhood. Ichigo embodies teenage angst in a nutshell: he doesn’t really get along with his parents, claims to hate his provincial town, is bossy, and gets jealous easily.
When an accident leaves MC without a place to stay, she moves in with Ichigo and his parents. After Ichigo strong-arms her into helping out at the pastry shop in lieu of paying rent, because that’s totally how it works in a romance story. As time goes on, the pair gets better reacquainted with each other, and MC helps Ichigo get along better with his high expectations Asian father. She also reignites his passion for baking cakes, and encourages him to participate in local community events.
Cute as their blossoming relationship might be, teenage drama^tm gets in the way, pretty quickly. When Togo, Ichigo’s free-spirited and somewhat selfish brother, moves back to town temporarily, the kid pretty much loses it. And things get worse after he spots Togo and MC hugging...
Objectively speaking, Ichigo and MC’s love story is pretty frustrating. Ichigio’s hypocritical jealousy, for starters, is very annoying (how come he gets to hang out with pretty girls while getting pissy over any guy MC talks to?!). His general brattiness and nobody-understands-me attitude is irritating. And both Ichigo and MC are absolutely terrible communicators. He and MC are just way too young and immature for me to really believe in or root for their happily ever after, despite all those final episode vows of true love.
But all those character flaws are also what I found kind of charming about this whole story/setup. The characters felt and behaved like relatively realistic teenagers. And even though I’ve never so much as stepped foot in West Tokyo, the whole thing gave me a strong sense of nostalgia! So in short, if you totally ignore the romantic aspect of this route, the charming portrayal of teenage life in a slowly modernizing small town in Japan was nicely done!
Personality: 3/10 The kid has promise, but he needs at least 5 years or so to grow up...
Appearance: Not gonna rate a child who’s almost half my age, sorry!
MC: 5/10. MC kind of needs to grow a backbone. That said, she comes across as quite mature and levelheaded for her age.
Plot/Payoff: 6/10. The romance sucked, but the setting was cute and charming in its own way.
Personal enjoyment: 6/10. A nice if not particularly fantastic story.
Midnight Cinderella: Louis Howard Honey Route Review [SPOILERS]
“Even if you ask me to leave now, I'm afraid you're stuck with me.”
I didn’t come into Louis’ route expecting to like him, or the route, all that much. Louis’ ice prince schtick never really called out to me, and well...MidCin isn’t exactly known for its riveting and realistic main story plotlines, now is it? ...Let’s just say, I have been happily proved wrong. :)
Louis is kind of an ass to MC in the beginning of the route, after getting roped into teaching MC dancing/etiquette/etc by Giles. On top of being cold af, he’s also pretty rude (“If a commoner like yourself were to become princess, I assure you, it would not end happily”). But we learn early on that the guy has good intentions. As someone who was essentially kidnapped into nobility (did not see that one coming...!), he knows first hand just how cruel the upper class can be to former commoners. And he doesn’t wish that fate upon MC.
Turns out, his instincts are spot on. When MC isn’t able to keep up with snooty traditions like not getting one’s own food at a party, she is judged. But MC forges her own path. And not just with superficial cultural norms, either. For example, after hearing Louis has been having trouble with his duchy’s orphanage, she casually issues a proclamation protecting all the orphanages across Wysteria, like a boss! And it’s not like this doesn’t come at a personal cost, either - she gets kidnapped for her troubles (don’t worry, our duke in shining armor comes galloping to her rescue ;D).
So Louis tries his hardest to resist MC’s siren call, but let’s be real, who could say no to this badass girl? When Louis does eventually give in to his feelings, there is no turning back (“If becoming the prince consort will make it easier to protect you, then I’ll do it in a heartbeat”). MC and Louis’ lengthy confessions to each other, midway through the plot, are super cute/well done.
But MC and Louis’ story is just getting started. Because when the external plot conflict hits, boy does it hit hard! There is espionage, and hidden plots, and backstabbing. Stein and Wysteria are brought to the brink of war. Lives are at stake. The problems that Louis and MC face aren’t the kind that can be solved by some dinky little treaty, like in Rayvis’ route, or some PR stunt, like in Byron’s route, either. For the first time reading MidCin, I truly had no idea how things could possibly play out in the couple’s favor.
And yeah, sure, the resolution ended up being a little cheesy. But it felt earned. I really wish MidCin focused on the conflict/tension between Wysteria and Stein a lot more, in general. Some of the other routes bring in third or fourth countries for plot conflict, and it’s not nearly as compelling. In contrast, I totally loved the focus on Stein as a potentially menacing powerhouse here (and yeah, it totally makes those Stein boys even hotter, haha).
As for Louis himself? He doesn’t necessarily stand out among the hordes of other amazing otome boys out there imho, but he was still pretty great. But the character I enjoyed the most in this story was MC herself! She was proactive, and all sorts of badass, and didn’t let Louis get away with shit. I adore IkeSen’s MC, don’t get me wrong, but Louis’ MC really shows that you don’t always need sass to shine.
At the end of the day, Rayvis remains my #1 favorite MidCin boy. But this was definitely the #1 best main story that I’ve read from MidCin, to date! If you like this game and haven’t gotten around to his route yet, I highly recommend it. :)
Personality: 9/10. Louis comes across as cold in the beginning, but I love how consistently sweet he is after he actually gets together with MC.
Appearance: 8/10. WTF is going on with Louis’ hair?! What’s holding it up - a combination of hair gel and magic?! Ok but seriously, he’s pretty hot. :)
MC: 10/10. Best MidCin MC I’ve read so far, by a long shot!
Plot/Payoff: 9/10. Super duper solid plot. Things are a little cheesy, but hey, I like a little cheese in my otome games, haha.
Personal enjoyment: 9.5/10. I enjoyed this route wayyy more than I thought I would!
Masterlist
Irresistible Mistakes - Toshiaki Kijima Review [SPOILERS]
Irresistible Mistakes is one of my favorite Voltage/Love365 offerings. Released only a few short years ago, it provides a delightfully modern take on the otome genre with some truly awesome characters/love interests.
For those of you who haven’t played the game before: Irresistible Mistakes’ MC is an advertising copywriter (think Mad Men) at a top advertising agency. One night, she gets a little too drunk at a corporate event, and has a one night stand with one of the guys at the party. In this route, she sleeps with Toshiaki, the head of accounts/resident data guy, otherwise dubbed “the exec from hell.” So you can imagine how horrified the poor girl is when she’s put on an ad-hoc team, led by Toshiaki himself, to design an ad for a coffee company. Good thing the guy is determined to pretend nothing happened between them, right?
This doesn’t really quell MC’s initial fears. But is Toshiaki truly a hellish person to work for? Not even remotely. He’s an efficient and somewhat demanding boss and doesn’t hold back on giving constructive feedback, but he definitely isn’t the asshole everyone thinks he is. He covers for his relatively green team, repeatedly. And he never gets angry with MC and her friend over things outside their control, like one would expect most asshole bosses to.
You could say Toshiaki’s reputation is overblown, and it’s easy to see why. The guy is super stoic, and not very personable. A lot of who he is in the story stems from a lost love, many years back. He has a lot of personal demons to fight, and MC plays an important role in helping him begin the healing process. If Shunichiro’s route falls under the “whirlwind romance” category, Toshiaki’s route is much more slow burn: our couple can’t get together until the guy is fixed. It’s a tired trope you’ve probably read many, many times before.
But crucially, here it’s done very well. Toshiaki and MC’s romance trajectory feels very natural, like the culmination of many small moments, not all sexually charged. Here are some of my favorite aspects of the route:
The emphasis on Toshiaki as a gentle and excellent lover. Great clue to his true personality!
Toshiaki helping MC pick out prizes for a party, only to skip out on the party so his underlings can have fun. Really speaks to his character, the poor guy. :(
The fact that the story directly addresses the negative consequences of working yourself too hard. MC faints from self-imposed overwork late in the story, and Toshiaki, like a champ, makes sure she gets her rest and isn’t incentivized to continue overworking.
The fact that MC and Toshiaki’s collaboration seems temporary, and that they’re in entirely different departments. Seems like a good recipe for a more sustainable/healthy workplace romance!
Coffee as a motif. The brand they’re trying to develop an ad for, Mira Black, is bitter and something of an acquired taste, much like Toshiaki himself (it’s not subtle; Mira Black was developed in Toshiaki’s home town, which he takes her to for inspiration, haha).
Again, I would never claim that Toshiaki’s route in Irresistible Mistakes is breaking new ground in the romance genre. I personally don’t believe that romances need to try something special/unique to be enjoyable if it’s done well. And Toshiaki’s story, imho, is definitely done very well! Overall, this route is an excellently written, straight-forward romance that I highly recommend if you want a pick-me-up, or something low-drama but good!
Choice quotes
“You’re the one who did all the work. This is the result of that.” Toshiaki being generous with the credit, even after seriously helping MC out with a deadline.
“No one has ever called me nice before.”
“I can’t erase the painful memories, but I can paint them with new ones. You taught me that.” 💕
Personality: 10/10. I am a total sucker for the stoic-but-kind type of guy, both irl and in fiction. ^_^
Appearance: 10/10. Toshiaki is super duper handsome and I’m 100% sure it made me like him even more from the get go, haha.
MC: 10/10. This was a very well-done MC! She had her flaws, sure (such as her tendency to overwork herself and her romance naiveté), but it only made her a more believable and relatable character.
Plot/Payoff: 9/10. A very very solid, if somewhat short, plot. I appreciated the maturity of all the characters. The way MC and Toshiaki connected on an emotional level was moving!
Personal enjoyment: 9.5/10. This story is like apple cobbler on a cold winter day. You know exactly what you’re getting into, and you know it’s going to be awesome!
Recommended if you like: SLBP Masamune
Masterlist
(PS -- hey everyone. It’s been a while. I recently logged into this blog on a lark after several years and discovered a small number of route reviews I’d written way back in the day and never posted, so I’ve queued them all up. :) Hope you’ve all been holding up ok during the pandemic. 💕)
SLBP Genya Fujibayashi Route Review [SPOILERS]
“If you need someone to rely on, make sure I’m the one you come to, okay?”
I did not have high hopes when I first started reading Genya’s route. He’s billed as the slacker of SLBP, which doesn’t appeal to me one bit (strike one). Also, he was released alongside the inimitable Hattori Hanzo (strike two). And finally, he pretty much made MC do all the legwork in his ES (strike three). But hey, minds can change, right?
Some background: back before MC’s ninja clan turned pacifist, she was friends with two boys, Saku(ya) and Gen(ya). Saku was in love with MC, and Gen, the older, earnest, hard working brother, was simply a friend. And then MC’s village quit ninja-ing, had to go into hiding, and the trio disbanded.
...Until now. MC runs into Gen while he’s on duty as Masamune’s body double (!). He kindly offers MC a place to lie low/plot after she learns that Nobunaga betrayed her village, and she takes him up on his offer. It doesn’t take long for MC to realize that Genya’s a little different from how she remembered him. He’s flirty, and kind of a tease (“You’re worried about being next to an amazing guy like me day and night, right?”). He’s lazy (“A life of ease and pleasure, that’s the best way to go”). And his place in Oshu is a shitty, abandoned temple on the outskirts of town that’s falling apart (this actually becomes a convenient plot device late in the story!).
But he’s a nice guy (this is pretty obvious from the get-go), and life with Genya is pretty pleasant for MC! She stumbles into a healing gig after helping one of Gen’s friends out, and it turns out to be super fulfilling. The two of them spend lots of time relaxing under a cherry tree and chatting with the local kids (who adorably remind MC of her/Saku/Gen ^_^). And for all of Gen’s self-proclaimed laziness, it turns out that he’s got her back when it really counts! Case in point: when MC oversleeps one morning, he does all of her medicine deliveries for her, nbd. Not what you’d expect from a guy who sleeps/gambles all day, right?
In fact, one of the biggest repeat “reveals” of this route is that under the uber-slacker facade, Gen is ready to work as hard as it takes to help out those he cares about. As an example, MC realizes at some point that Gen always takes on the more gruesome ninja jobs, so Saku won’t have to, even though he hates the Iga clan (who doesn’t?? haha). In one of my favorite moments in the route, he also puts his life into MC’s hands (literally) in order to help out Masamune, despite having the option of walking away. This kind of roundabout but “secretly hard working” side of Genya is super attractive to me, ngl!
Speaking of attraction, this is definitely a slow burn romance. MC and Genya have years of friendship history together, and it takes both of them time to stop seeing each others as just old friends (it’s maybe a little easier for MC, given Gen’s flirtiness, ^_^). In any case, MC and Gen’s relationship progression is generally chill/low-key until it really counts, kind of like the dude himself. I thought it was really well done! (This given the fact that Gen’s fake slacker personality still doesn’t do it for me, mind you.)
Plot wise, this route starts out very slice-of-life-y, but everything goes crazy pretty fast. For starters, Gen’s job as Masamune’s body double isn’t without its dangers, and MC does get roped into things repeatedly. It’s all worth it though, because Masamune is a super sweet and grateful employer. ^_^ And then, there’s Gen’s bro Sakuya, who’s been tasked with killing MC. Add in some first love angst, the fractious relationship between Gen and Saku, and Hanzo for good measure... let’s just say, things get pretty dramatic. I enjoyed it!
Overall, I thought Genya’s story was an excellent read. You might think the route is pretty chill while reading it, because Gen is a super chill guy, but the writers manage to pack in an impressive amount of character/relationship development and drama into several short chapters! And instead of telling us what Gen is like and what his relationship with others are like, they show us. I might not find Gen to be the sexiest otome guy out there, but I did end up liking him a lot as a person. He’s a good guy, surrounded by good people (hi Oshu clan), and MC’s life has been made tons better by throwing her lot in with this lazy ninja!
Choice quotes:
“Gender matters not at all when it comes to talent.” - Masamune, proving once again why he is dream boyfriend material
“You’ve got a strength about you, one that lets you choose your own way of life and stick with it.”
Personality: 9/10 from platonic perspective, 3/10 romantically. Gen is unequivocally a nice guy, but he tries his hardest to hide it! I personally liked him a lot as a character, but tbh his flirty slacker facade is too strong for me to be attracted at all. YMMV! I know a lot of people love him.
Appearance: 8/10. No body double of Masamune’s is gonna be ugly. ;)
MC: 7/10. This MC was alright! She wasn’t as assertive as I typically like my MC’s to be, but she gets things done.
Plot/Payoff: 9/10.
Personal enjoyment: 8/10. Liked this way more than I thought I would, given the lack of attraction!
SLBP "The Dark Side of the Moon” Pt.2 Event Review
SLBP’s AU ninja ES world started out with wildly different stories, but it looks like the timelines are actually converging a bit, lol. My thoughts on the event:
In Sasuke’s route a woman claiming to be his long-lost sister comes knocking. Girl’s been masquerading as noblewoman, but her clan’s been wiped out. Or so she says... Anyway, Sasuke’s suspicious, but that doesn’t stop MC from naively spending unguarded time with the woman alone, which naturally leads to MC getting chloroformed at some point and Sasuke eventually punching the door down like the meathead he is, lol. Turns out dear sis is just some random ninja assassin. Insert surprised face here. Sasuke and MC fight her off like the team they are, and the story ends on an optimistic note, despite Iga now probably knowing who MC is. Whoops!
I always like me a good Sasuke-MC teamwork story, but this plot... uh... definitely left a bit to be desired, haha. There wasn’t really any complexity or interesting development, and everything was 100% predictable the second Sasuke’s “sister” entered the picture. It’s almost like Voltage put Sasuke’s story through a random story generator and this was the end result! :(
Personal enjoyment: 2/10
In Hotaru’s ES the poor boy’s been experiencing disturbing recurring nightmares where he’s covered in blood and MC (and others) are lying dead at his feet. Yikesss. :( In the meanwhile, MC and Hotaru’s been befriending a peppy and nice girl named Akane who totally ships the two of them, haha. Unfortunately, she also happens to be a ninja hellbent on revenge against Saizo, who’s been told by Yuki that Hotaru knows where S is (except just like Jon Snow, H knows nothing). At some point in time Yuki shows up in person to kunai MC like a random villainess, but Akane sics her ninja minions on the lady and everyone else lives happily ever after (and Hotaru bites MC?!?! ಠ_ಠ).
I thought this story was suspiciously similar to Sasuke’s, except with a substantially more interesting/nuanced/likable “hidden” ninja character, which definitely made the story more enjoyable to read. My biggest gripe, though: what exactly is Yuki’s end game here, besides trolling Hotaru/MC? I think Voltage could definitely do better with her character than treat her like a one note villain ^_^
Personal enjoyment: 5/10
Of all ES’s this round, Sakuya’s probably makes the most sense. Here, Genya (!) is paying his little bro a visit, ostensibly to split missions with him, but really, to check up on him. Aww. His concern is warranted: Sakuya has demons from his past that he’s having trouble reconciling. Dark, I’ve-been-ordered-to-murder-my-friends-and-Iga-doesn’t-have-therapists type demons. And of course, when S has to do it again and turns cold on all his new retainer buddies afterward, MC’s the only one who can drag him out of his funk with her endless optimism. Nothing really gets concretely resolved, but at least Gen can rest assured that MC’s got Sakuya’s back!
Sakuya’s ES really highlights how shitty Iga is. Like, the guy is future chief, and he still has to put up with emotionally cruel missions?!? That aside, I did enjoy the spirit of the story. I loved how Gen was the starring visiting ninja - definitely didn’t see that coming. The insight into Sakuya’s past was interesting (if not totally shocking), and overall, I definitely thought this was the strongest story, narrative wise. :)
Personal enjoyment: 8/10
So yeah. All these stories seemed to involve a visiting ninja. Feature, or bug? We’ll never know, lol. Anyway, what did y’all think of this event?
SLBP Maeda Toshiie/Inuchiyo Route Review [SPOILERS]
I have to be honest: the only reason why I reluctantly powered through Inuchiyo’s route was to get it out of the way. There is a lot of sexual assault (actual and attempted) in this route, and it’s definitely not for everyone.
The first thing you should know about this route is that a love triangle is one of the main plot drivers. When MC finds herself in Azuchi castle, there are two retainers ready to help her to get settled in. There’s Hideyoshi, who sees through her man disguise almost instantly. And then of course, there’s Inuchiyo, MC’s childhood friend, and six years her senior. Where Hideyoshi is charming and friendly, Inuchiyo is brusque and honest. Where Hideyoshi likes to solve issues with cleverness and words, Inuchiyo solves them with his fists. But both of them find themselves in love with MC at the same time. For Hideyoshi, it’s a new infatuation, but for Inuchiyo, he’s been in love with her since they were young children (which means a 13 year old Inuchiyo loved a 7 year old MC...?! Don’t think about it too hard). And of course, MC, precious oblivious child that she is, isn’t aware of any of this.
Which brings me to the second thing you have to know about Inuchiyo’s route: this is a story where MC is sexually assaulted by her suitor. To be more specific, one day, Inuchiyo somehow manages to convince himself that MC is in love with Hideyoshi, after a festival date (she isn’t). He spends the next DAY drinking, and then the following night, finds MC, and drunkenly forces a kiss onto her before moving on to her neck AND LOWER...! The language used here is completely horrifying. MC is clearly an unwilling participant: however, when I put all my strength into pushing away, he presses his hand to the back of my neck, and forces my lips on his. And Inuchiyo says some awful things (“I’ll die before I give you away”). As if MC’s is his to give to anyone?!?!
This isn’t even the first attempted assault that takes place in the story (nor the last one). Earlier, Nobunaga’s creepy uncle tries to make a move on MC. Nobunaga is quick to accuse MC the victim of being up to no good like a proper asshole, but Inuchiyo actually comes across as quite the hero in this situation, taking the blame for MC and getting temporarily exiled from the Oda clan (his redemption is another major plot point). This whole thing makes Inuchiyo’s drunken actions against MC later on even more horrifying, considering he knows MC was a recent victim! It might also be the writing: I’m personally much more willing to forgive an unsolicited kiss from a love interest than unsolicited other stuff, so why couldn’t the writers have just stopped early?! Given this guy’s angst levels, he probably would’ve felt just as guilty and literally everything else about the plot could’ve stayed the same.
What Inuchiyo does to MC is bad enough, but honestly, there’s so much more to this incident than the guy’s actions that make this such a terrible, anger inducing read. There’s Nobunaga, who almost comes across as nice by putting an overcoat around MC right after the assault before immediately victim blaming her (again) and firing her for Inuchiyo’s actions because she is “far too naive to survive among men.” The fuck?!?! There’s Inuchiyo, who confesses his love to a traumatized MC the next day in lieu of apologizing. There’s restaurant regulars, who, without even knowing the full story, BULLY MC into chasing after Inuchiyo because they think the guy might kill himself. As if Inuchiyo’s well-being should be of any concern to MC after the shit he pulled?!?!
You might be interested to know that Inuchiyo doesn’t in fact run off to kill himself. He runs away from MC and his feelings to the Maeda clan, where he becomes promptly engaged to another beautiful childhood friend. Because of course the guy who assaults a woman would be “punished” with the company of another woman, right?! Of the three sexual assault incidents in this story, not one man gets his proper comeuppance. It’s realistic in this era, I guess, but completely disgusting and off putting.
The one bright spot to this terrible situation, in my opinion is Hideyoshi, the guy who brings Second Lead Syndrome to a whole new level. Poor Hideyoshi is the one who apologizes for Inuchiyo the day after MC’s assault, even though it’s not his fault. He even has Mitsunari bring a scarf to help cover her neck bruises...! And even before The Incident, this man is a complete angel. He’s friendly, caring, flirtatious, cerebral, gentle... basically, everything that Inuchiyo isn’t. And when it becomes clear that MC is in love with Inuchiyo (a realization that seems to come out of nowhere, btw), the guy is devastated, but accepting and supportive. No drunken larks for this one. No angry assaults. I’m not saying that MC chose wrong here, but...wait, yeah, that’s exactly what I’m saying.
To be honest, ignoring all the assaults, the plot is objectively quite interesting. There’s a lot going on. Inuchiyo’s fall from grace on MC’s behalf (and subsequent climb back up). His struggles with re-taking his mantle as heir of the Maeda clan, after running around as the prodigal son for years. The heartbreaking demons from Inuchiyo’s past, featuring MC’s father (!). A battle to save Katsuie’s life, amidst injuries and potential traitors. It’s a real pity, that for me, all these stellar subplots are overshadowed by Inuchiyo’s assault of MC.
Speaking of stellar, Inuchiyo’s side cast is fantastic. Hideyoshi aside, there’s Keiji, Inichiyo’s hilariously crazy wayward nephew. There’s Toshihisa, Inuchiyo’s strangely sexy dying bro and Keiji’s adopted dad, who is responsible for what is probably the most k-drama like scene I have ever witnessed in an otome game. (tl;dr evil mom with envelope full of money). There’s beefy Katsuie, Inuchiyo’s kind mentor slash father figure type. There’s Sayuri, Inuchiyo’s childhood friend/temporary fiancée who gets completely screwed over. Even Nassa, the main villain, is delightfully loathsome and villainous. And despite being furious with Inuchiyo for a good fraction of the route, I found myself absolutely falling in love and rooting for these amazing other characters (except Nassa).
At the end of the day, I think Inuchiyo’s route is a decently well written and fleshed out story with a lot of potential that was brought down by a completely off-putting sexual assault arc and a somewhat underdeveloped romance. If you’ve ever wanted to know more about Inuchiyo’s side characters, or fall hard in love with Hideyoshi, or ever felt like your blood pressure isn’t high enough, this might be the route for you. But if you’re looking for some romance...do yourself a favor. Skip this route, and let Inuchiyo’s event story personality stay in your mind, untarnished by his main route. ^_^
Personality: 2/10. Sadly, being a childhood friend (a trope I love!!) and desperately in love with MC doesn’t stop Inuchiyo from fucking up in the worst possible way in this route. There’s a lot to like about him in his ES’s, such as his protective and passionate nature, but all of that is overshadowed here by the aspects of his personality that led to The Incident™. As @sharksmirk puts it, this guy “waves more red flags than a Chinese military parade.”
Appearance: 8/10. Two words: war armor.
MC: 7/10. Poor MC! She has to deal with so many crappy situations in this route. I really feel for her.
Plot/Payoff: 5/10. There was WAY too much assault in this route for my personal liking, but the non-assault aspects of the plot were admittedly pretty good imho.
Personal enjoyment: 2/10. It’s funny: if Inuchiyo had only kissed MC and nothing more, I’d likely have given this route a solid 6 or 7. But as it is... :/
Masterlist
SLBP Cuckoo Event Review
MC as the cuckoo in that famous samurai cuckoo saying... I definitely liked the premise of the event. And here’s what I thought of the contents, in increasing order of happiness!
Ieyasu’s story starts out on a bizarre note: when MC visits his temporary shop because of his random love letter, his goons capture her and Yahiko (poor Y gets rope burns...!), he proposes marriage sweetly, MC calls him out on his fake bullshit, and he reverts to his pissy, insulting self. The guy spends the next few weeks visiting MC’s restaurant, not eating anything, and calling MC stupid. And because MC’s a masochist and highly susceptible to reverse psychology, she works way harder to impress his picky palate than I personally would’ve... Eventually Ieyasu asks MC to move back with him, gets pissy when she doesn’t immediately accept, and disappears for months so that MC can wallow in angst, before coming back and sweeping her away.
...Ugh. WTF did I just read? Why did Ieyasu even like MC in the first place?! He claims he saw her working and instantly fell in love, but that’s BS and his motivations are unclear. And why did MC want to impress this rude idiot anyway? In this story Ieyasu deserves a punch to the face, not delicious food and true love. I hated it. Ieyasu fans may disagree, but I personally can’t stand his stupid “poison smile” right now. ^_^
Personal enjoyment: 1/10
In this story it’s clear that Hideyoshi’s been harboring a crush on MC for a while because she’s “cute and hardworking.” Giving Inichiyo an aneurysm with his flirty tactics is simply a plus for this charmer. MC’s shy, but he spends his days allowing himself to be friend zoned and being nice to her and helping with groceries and such. And making MC jealous with his perfumes handkerchieves and fixing women’s sandals, but hey, we always knew this guy was a rogue, lol. In the end, right before he gives up on MC forever, he realizes that MC’s jealousy stems from mutual feelings, and the story ends on a hopeful note (“Perhaps this doesn’t have to be the end of things just yet?”).
I thought H was pretty likeable in this event personally, but as with Ieyasu, I found his romantic motivations to be unclear. How was it possible he had a crush on MC if he’d never talked to her before? What made her so special, besides plot reasons?! In any case, I don’t love jealousy plots and the story itself was pretty simplistic imho, but H was sweet and I thought it wasn’t too bad overall.
Personal enjoyment: 5.5/10
Nobunaga’s ES starts out in a classically Nobunaga-ish fashion, with the guy demanding marriage from MC out of nowhere. And MC’s having none of it! He eventually reveals he actually wanted MC for her one-of-a-kind cooking skills, lmfao. Of course. This makes total sense 😂. Anyway, Nobunaga drags MC to hang out several times during his stay in Kyoto, and the pair eventually do grow genuine feeelings for each other over sugar-fueled dates. The guy comes back from a battle to rescue MC at a critical moment, confesses his final reason for wanting MC (“because I couldn’t think of dying and leaving you behind”), and everyone lives happily ever after.
Nobunaga is an absolute treat when he’s not hurting anyone with his ridiculous antics, and he was definitely in fine form in this story! He gives off strong YA novel love interest vibes with his stupid imperiousness (that MC doesn’t take seriously thank goodness), and I am A-ok with that, lol. I also liked how his motivations were clear throughout the entire story! Overall, I thought this ES was delightful to read and it was definitely my favorite of the lot.
Personal enjoyment: 9/10
All in all, I wouldn’t say this was my favorite event, but I came in with no expectations so from that perspective it could’ve been worse.
If you want another (more thirsty, lol) perspective you should check out @aedysa’s recap! I have no idea how to link on mobile though ^_^
Anyway, what did you all think of this event? :)
SLBP “The Bride’s Memories, Fleeting as Tears in Rain” Event Review
Props to Voltage for exploring past the traditional happily ever after! This event has been a little surprising to me in several ways - first, I didn’t expect it to ever exist, and second, well...let’s just say there is no correlation between how much I like a character and how good I thought their stories were, lol. My personal ranking, from least to most fave:
In Masamune’s ES, Hideyoshi and the Hojo clan are preparing to go to war against each other. Both of them want the Date clan to help...and both of them want MC as a hostage as well. WTF? The retainers are split, Masamune’s obviously reluctant to do anything, and MC ends up getting chloroformed by Hojo sympathizers at some point, only for M to conveniently save the day at the last second. She convinces M she wants to be a hostage, and the story ends up with MC in a palanquin, on her way to...somewhere.
My tolerance for unrealistic bullshit in SLBP stories is pretty high, but this story was just too damn much, lmao. Masamune clearly has the position of power here as the third party...can’t he just declare that he’ll ally himself to the first clan to rescind their hostage demand?! Hideyoshi and Masamune seemed to get along ok in M’s Act 2...I’m sure the guy could be made to see reason. I did like the beginning scene where Masamune strokes MC’s hair and lets her sleep in, but to be very honest I kind of thought the rest of the story was crap. ^_^
Personal enjoyment: 1/10
In Kojuro’s ES, he and MC decide to take care of a boy from the enemy Ashina clan who’s lost his memories (not sure why they couldn’t have just watched him from a distance, tbh). Except then the whole town becomes convinced that said boy is Kojuro’s “bastard” child from before MC, and gets super mad at him! I’m sure this is exactly how people in ancient Japan would’ve reacted to a powerful man’s extramarital child, lol. In the end, boy regains his memories, the Ashina clan learns about him and declares war with the Date clan over the “hostage” they imprisoned, and that’s that. 😂
I mean... I’m glad the story didn’t end with some bullshit reason to separate K from MC?! Besides that, I’m not really sure what the point of this whole ES was. The plot was pretty boring imho, and Kojuro was absent/distant/not romantic for a large part of it. I’m not sure why MC was so insistent that Kojuro be nice to an enemy child, either. Also I saw that trap coming from a mile away once Kojuro mentioned the Ashina were plotting something, and I can’t say I’m super excited to see how this story plays out.
Personal enjoyment: 2/10
Nobunaga spends most of his ES humiliating his new retainer Murashige. From forcing Murashige to eat mochi directly off his sword (not an innuendo!!) to insulting his young son’s drawing of him to giving a military leadership position to Hideyoshi when Murashige made the most strategic sense, one really starts to wonder how Oda “no people skills” Nobunaga was ever able to get that close to Divine Rule in the first place, lol. In any case, to nobody’s surprise Murashige ends up betraying Nobunaga at a crucial moment, and Nobunaga ends up divorcing MC (this again?! 😂) after a night of astounding sex.
Things I did like about this route: Nobunaga secretly being nice to the son when he thinks nobody’s watching. That sex scene. Nobunaga getting pissed with Murashige claiming his young wife is the most beautiful woman in world (of course, lmao). Things I didn’t love so much: Nobunaga’s total lack of communication regarding why he does the shit he does! I bet we’re going to find out during the sequel that Nobunaga knew all along that Murashige was suspicious. ^_^
Personal enjoyment: 6/10
After saving the road to a neighboring province from kidnappers and murderers, Yukimura truly proves himself to be the hero we all know he is in his ES! There isn’t too much plot beyond that, but this story is full of cute/hilarious moments instead, such as the poor idiot freaking out when he learns that MC’s gravely injured herself after several rounds of telephone, lmao (spoiler: she just cut herself, a little, while cooking). There’s also a bit of drama/angst when the neighboring province tries to poach Y for a few months to handle some problem I don’t remember and he’s reluctant to leave MC, but he eventually does leave, only to quash said problem... and have a cliff fall on him. !!
This story was definitely super light on the plot, lol. But no plot is better than a bad plot, imho! I did really like the little slice of life moments we got between MC and Yukimura, such as his adorable reaction to MC figuring out how to carve a turnip chrysanthemum ^_^ These two dorks are so in love and impressed with each other. I thought it was super sweet!! Best quote: “I cannot put anything or anyone else before you, even in my thoughts.”
Personal enjoyment: 7/10
Mitsuhide’s ES is a cute little treat. Here, the poor guy’s been obviously overworking himself, to the point of not having time to accept MC’s care/food (!). And in the meanwhile, people in town have been collapsing for mysterious reasons! After M himself also passes out, he realizes the townsfolk have been suffering from malnutrition after switching from farming to fishing. While MC teaches them how to cook veggies with the fish (lol), he saves the day by establishing a vegetable/fish trading route, and everyone lives happily ever after! ...Except not, because MC finds the guy coughing BLOOD. Uh oh.
I thought the plot was a little silly (do the townsfolk really need some uppity city girl teaching them how to cook vegetables?! lmao), but it was nonetheless a lovely, self-contained, and interesting read! The real star of this story was definitely Mitsuhide himself, who apart from being an overworked sweetheart for the whole ES, also busted out the single best line of dialogue in this event: “When I eat your food...that’s how I know I am home.” Awww 😍 I’m really hoping we learn his illness isn’t terminal in the sequel!
Personal enjoyment: 8/10
Saizo’s story is one of the more adventure-filled ones! Here, the ninja’s been sent alongside Yukimura on a diplomatic mission to one of their more remote territories/villages. Unfortunately, the son of the village elder holds a grudge against Saizo due to murder (understandable). Said son also kidnaps MC and tries to rape her (less understandable!), but of course, Saizo saves the day. MC talks S down from killing the guy, but the ungrateful bastard claims Saizo’s attacked him and has him arrested...! Yikes.
This story was delightfully dramatic, and I really enjoyed it. Not to mention, Saizo was sweeter than I’ve ever seen him before! From buying MC a cord she was eyeing to resting in her lap to talking in the onsen with her to acknowledging that MC’s made him less murderous, this guy showed that he definitely is capable of doing the romance thing when he wants to. Not to mention, his saving MC scene was super badass (The ravens have come...and so has he)!! I’m quite curious to see what’ll happen in the sequel!
Personal enjoyment: 9/10
I may not have loved every story in this latest event (cough Date clan), but every CG looks so good, like wow! My favorite is definitely Nobunaga’s ;)
Anyway, what did you think of this event?? ^_^
Hello, I’m currently reading Sasuke’s route in SLBP & I wanted to know your thoughts on it? Love your blog! 💛
Hi dear! Thanks for the ask!! :) Sorry for letting it sit in my box for so long ^_^ Long story short, I personally did not like Sasuke’s route in SLBP. It started out so strong, and Sasuke gives such an amazing, sexy, first impression (like Shingen, but a ninja!), but he ends up treating MC really poorly in the second half of his route. :( Without giving everything away, he basically makes unreasonable demands of MC and blames her when things don’t go the way he wanted them to. He says some truly awful things!
If you want my completely spoiler-laden review (seriously it spoils like 99% of the route!), here’s a link: https://otome-reviews.tumblr.com/post/174274157499/slbp-sasuke-sarutobi-light-ending-route-review
Thanks for stopping by!! 🌸
SLBP “The Dark Side of the Moon” Event Review
Confession time: when it’s battle event season in SLBP, I don’t even bother opening the app nowadays 😂 Anyway, here are my thoughts on the latest ninja event, meant to serve as a prequel to the other ninja event (the sex one) we had a few weeks ago!
In Kyoichiro’s story, the ex-ninja has to come to terms with the fact that MC is still an active ninja with ninja-ish obligations. Except he doesn’t really, and instead gets cold and upset when Nobunaga has MC create a specialized poison for ninjas and she follows through (“You aren’t a child. You’ll be fine without me around”). Not a good look, dude. He does redeem himself - kind of - when he saves MC from the ever villainous Sakuya later, I guess, but, still. In the end he “helps” MC realize she wants to negotiate a better position with Nobunaga and he promises to assist, except we never get to see him actually do that because the route ends on an admittedly cute seduction scene instead.
There were TONS of stupidly cute scenes between Kyoichiro and MC in this ES, but tbh I still found it really frustrating, especially given what he pulls in this event’s sequel. Like...he promises to help MC not have to be a poison ninja, but if we look at his future actions, he then totally sabotages her efforts to find a less shitty boss in the form of Shingen?! Ughhhh. Not to mention how completely awful he was to MC when she was just doing her job as a ninja in this ES. Kyoichiro was way too hot and then cold in this story for my liking, and I personally found his emotional strong-arming of MC to be completely unattractive. If he’s gonna emotionally manipulate his girlfriend into doing what he wants, he should at least try to have the charm to go along with it like Hideyoshi, ffs! Overall I suspect a lot of people will find this story sweet, especially with all the cute and seductive lines, but I really disliked it.
Personal enjoyment: 2/10
The ever-dramatic Hanzo has to go back to Hattori village to deal with some political unrest (he’s the future chief) in his ES, and poor MC literally cannot handle his impending absence. Doesn’t help that Hanzo doesn’t seem to know when (or if) he’s coming back, and MC doesn’t have the balls to ask if he’ll miss her or not. Girl please! Anyway, turns out this forced separation was all part of evil Sakuya’s grand plan, and when MC tries to leave Mikawa for her own safety she falls right into the guy’s trap, gets chased around for days, and in the end it’s up to Hanzo to save her and bring her home! Now why MC didn’t just make a big loop back to Mikawa after realizing she was being chased we’ll never know... In any case, Yandere!Hanzo comes out in full force, and it’s, uh, something else. After dragging MC to the room and gifting her with a hickey in the creepiest/sexiest way possible, he leaves her with this lovely Hanzo-ism: “I shall not forgive you for leaving on your own again.” Because of course. 😂
That creepy/sexy ending bugs me way less than one might think (actually I liked it). Hot yet fucked up is Hanzo’s signature style, after all! That said, I didn’t really love the earlier part of this story. For starters, Hanzo was a total ass to my boy Kiyohiro, referring him to as an “it.” Bro. Also, he totally should’ve given MC more clarity regarding how to be safe in Mikawa in his absence! Or, maybe it’s Kiyohiro’s fault for being vague about his orders, who knows. I’m also not hugely fond of how useless MC seemed in this story. In any case, it takes a lot for me to not give a Hanzo route a 10, but this plot was just too annoying to read for me to fully enjoy. Full props to Hanzo for his amazing quotes and off the charts sexiness though! (“Once I might have lived with the thought of you dying somewhere without me knowing, but it is now more than I can bear. I suppose I must at last name this obsession I have formed with you as love.”)
Personal enjoyment: 7/10
Genya’s route is an adventure. Saku’s been tasked with finding and killing an old friend and Iga fugitive, and in the meanwhile, there’s been a weird mental contagion spreading from the pleasure district that Kojuro would like MC to help heal. Both MC and Genya end up doing a fair amount of scouting around the brothels - even though, as Genya rightfully points out, it’s wayyy dangerous for MC, and her poor spying skills almost gets them in trouble at some point! In the end, Genya gets proof that the Iga guy has been responsible for the mental weirdness. He works with MC to set up a trap: he pretends to capture MC and offer her to Iga guy as a test subject, and then surprise cuts the guy down, helping MC get the info she needs to create a remedy while sparing Saku from an unpleasant mission in the process!
I love how action-packed this ES was! ^_^ I’m not usually big on jealousy as a plot device, but one of my favorite parts of the story was definitely when Genya pretended to reassure a madly jealous MC after she crashed his meeting with the Iga guy in order to hide her face (“C’mon, don’t cry. I’m not here ‘cause I’m messin’ around with other women, okay?”)! Lol. Overall, I thought Genya was in fine form in this story: sexy, flirtatious, loving, just the right amount of protective... 😍 Anyways, this ES really highlights the fact that even a “simple” story line that’s well executed can be really enjoyable!
Personal enjoyment: 9/10
What did you all think of this latest event? :)
SLBP April Fool’s Event Review :)
Okay let’s get one thing out of the way: this is obviously the best event SLBP ever has or will release. 😂 When I saw those teasers on Tumblr I thought it was a massive joke, but who knew Voltage would actually give us “routes” for our favorite old men?! Lmao. So yeah, I’m giving this event an overall 10, but some routes were def. better than others imho. My personal ranking, from least to most favorite:
The mysterious Sen no Rikyu seems to know exactly what’s going on in his ES: he and MC have been pulled into the spirit realm, and MC is mistress of the place. Somehow. Demon magistrate doesn’t hold a chance against this guy’s knowledge - or his kissing skills, for that matter. Because the guy kisses MC twice?! On the lips?!? Dammnnnnn boy. Pity MC doesn’t remember a thing when she wakes. Forced amnesia is such a crap copout, imho. And I never did figure out who this Rikyu guy! Is he a ghost? Is he really that old? I don’t see any wrinkles… So many questions, so few answers. ^_^
In beefy, broad-shouldered Katsuie’s fun route, MC’s kiss is able to make Katsuie OP in fights! Useful, because at some point the demon KIDNAPS MC and tries to force a kiss of marriage on her. We already knew the magistrate was a creep, but demon magistrate is like 1000x worse, yikes! 😬 Good thing Old Man Katsuie is there to save the day, eh? :) Overall I thought this route was fun, if super silly! Best quote: “Your Multiplication Jutsu is no match for me!”
Sakai’s hair (or usual lack thereof) becomes a Major Plot Point in his ES, when MC’s kiss lets him temporarily regain the hair he had as a youth! Even the demon magistrate is too distracted to fight properly (“Damn…damn you and your luscious locks!”). 😂 I thought this route was delightfully absurd and ridiculous - exactly what one would expect and hope for from an April Fool’s story. I also enjoyed the new perspective on Sakai’s character - he’s got a secret angry fighter streak?! Lmao. The only thing keeping this from being my favorite story was Ieyasu’s mean appearance at the end! Go away, Ieyasu. ^_^
Ibano’s always been a distractingly handsome grandpa imho, and his ES is delightful! This kind, hot older man quickly realizes MC’s kiss has power when her lips brush his throat by accident (scandalous!). And at the critical moment when the demon magistrate is on the verge of winning, he apologizes and kisses MC full on the lips, activating her dream awakening powers and saving them both! And then they HUG when they’re back in Owari and I developed cavities, because literally everyone in the Date Clan is date-able (ha ha ha get it I’ll show myself out now that was awful) and Gramps is clearly no exception! Easily my favorite route of the lot. <3
What were your rankings? Which old men would successfully steal your heart? I’m super curious - let me know! ;)
SLBP April Fool’s Event Review :)
Okay let’s get one thing out of the way: this is obviously the best event SLBP ever has or will release. 😂 When I saw those teasers on Tumblr I thought it was a massive joke, but who knew Voltage would actually give us “routes” for our favorite old men?! Lmao. So yeah, I’m giving this event an overall 10, but some routes were def. better than others imho. My personal ranking, from least to most favorite:
The mysterious Sen no Rikyu seems to know exactly what’s going on in his ES: he and MC have been pulled into the spirit realm, and MC is mistress of the place. Somehow. Demon magistrate doesn’t hold a chance against this guy’s knowledge - or his kissing skills, for that matter. Because the guy kisses MC twice?! On the lips?!? Dammnnnnn boy. Pity MC doesn’t remember a thing when she wakes. Forced amnesia is such a crap copout, imho. And I never did figure out who this Rikyu guy! Is he a ghost? Is he really that old? I don’t see any wrinkles... So many questions, so few answers. ^_^
In beefy, broad-shouldered Katsuie’s fun route, MC’s kiss is able to make Katsuie OP in fights! Useful, because at some point the demon KIDNAPS MC and tries to force a kiss of marriage on her. We already knew the magistrate was a creep, but demon magistrate is like 1000x worse, yikes! 😬 Good thing Old Man Katsuie is there to save the day, eh? :) Overall I thought this route was fun, if super silly! Best quote: “Your Multiplication Jutsu is no match for me!”
Sakai’s hair (or usual lack thereof) becomes a Major Plot Point in his ES, when MC’s kiss lets him temporarily regain the hair he had as a youth! Even the demon magistrate is too distracted to fight properly (“Damn...damn you and your luscious locks!”). 😂 I thought this route was delightfully absurd and ridiculous - exactly what one would expect and hope for from an April Fool’s story. I also enjoyed the new perspective on Sakai’s character - he’s got a secret angry fighter streak?! Lmao. The only thing keeping this from being my favorite story was Ieyasu’s mean appearance at the end! Go away, Ieyasu. ^_^
Ibano’s always been a distractingly handsome grandpa imho, and his ES is delightful! This kind, hot older man quickly realizes MC’s kiss has power when her lips brush his throat by accident (scandalous!). And at the critical moment when the demon magistrate is on the verge of winning, he apologizes and kisses MC full on the lips, activating her dream awakening powers and saving them both! And then they HUG when they’re back in Owari and I developed cavities, because literally everyone in the Date Clan is date-able (ha ha ha get it I’ll show myself out now that was awful) and Gramps is clearly no exception! Easily my favorite route of the lot. <3
What were your rankings? Which old men would successfully steal your heart? I’m super curious - let me know! ;)
SLBP “Consummate Moonlight: Passion Ascending” Pt 2 Review
Yeah, yeah, I know this event ended like a week ago, lol. I’ve been swamped with real life stuff. Nearly everything that could possibly change in my life is changing - but in the best possible way! So I’m going on semi-hiatus for a bit - aka the only otome I’m likely to consume for the foreseeable future are SLBP events and IkeRev stories with CG’s. Sorry, MidCin Giles anon! ^_^
But enough about me! Here are my highly belated thoughts on the 2nd batch of ninja pre-sex events, from least to most favorite. :)
Kyoichiro is, for lack of a better description, a little bitch in his ES. When MC is headhunted (alongside the Mitsuba) by Shingen, Kyo comes along for the journey. Which seems cute on the surface, except he’s really only there to guilt MC into hurting the potential deal by going back to Oda territory with him, and all because he’s being headhunted himself by Hideyoshi (“Will you go with me, or onward to Kai?”). Upon their return, Kyo gets arrested by Nobunaga on suspicion of being Goemon, and it’s up to MC and Hideyoshi to rob a samurai in his absence to save his sorry ass. And of course, Kyo’s upset that MC puts herself in danger, and doesn’t even apologize (he has much to learn from Sasuke...). In the end, Kyo’s grateful to MC and I guess it’s kind of cute, but I was too upset to really appreciate the scene tbh. ^_^
This ES had the makings of a great story, but too much went wrong imho. I would’ve liked it better if MC had made the decision of returning with Kyo herself, without him explicitly asking her to (cos that’s awfully selfish of him). I would’ve liked it even better if she’d at least met with Shingen for her clan’s sake! Also, I wanted to read the actual scene where MC and H became thieves. And don’t even get me started with that omg-you-put-yourself-in-danger bullshit that he pulled (without apologizing!!). All in all, I think Kyoichiro does have his good sides, but they definitely weren’t on display in this story.
Personal enjoyment: 3/10
In Genya’s ES the poor guy is faced with one doozy of an order from Iga: kill Masamune. Holy shit! Adding to the pressure is the fact that Sakuya (aka Genya’s evil bro) has found MC, and is more than ready to kill her if he doesn’t follow orders. Yikes. Gen handles the situation with as much grace as one can reasonably expect, which is to say it feels like he’s on a verge of a breakdown for half the story, but can you really blame the guy?! Gen’s eventual “confrontation” with a sleeping Masamune is devastatingly touching (“Aren’t you going to kill me?”), but fortunately, he, MC, and the Date clan are able to work together and come up with a solution out of this whole mess (but not before MC tries to leave to protect Gen and he saves her from Saku 💔). One Ashina assassination and a victorious battle later, and things fortunately go back to normal for the absolute sweetest gang in SLBP.
I loved this route (although it was super stressful to read!). Gen’s struggle to reconcile everything felt super realistic (or as realistic as one can get in a universe with magic ninjas), and he came off as such a great boyfriend to MC. Gotta admit though: every time I read a Genya story, I just end up hating Sakuya that much more. Good thing Gen more than compensates for his bro’s villainy! Best quote: “You can take everything I have, but not her! Never her!”
Personal enjoyment: 10/10
Hanzo is a bona fide semi-villain in his route, simultaneously manipulating Ieyasu into pursuing Divine Rule while, well, not really trusting that he can really pull it off. But when the hotheaded Ieyasu insists on facing the mighty Takeda army head on, Hanzo can’t even help because a) Ieyasu doesn’t want him there (“We don’t need you to come. You’ll just be a burden anyway”), and b) Hanzo’s injured and traditional medicine doesn’t work on him! In the end, Ieyasu's poison-filled salves end up doing the trick, and our snakey ninja is able to rush off into battle, save Ieyasu’s sorry ass, and return to Ieyasu’s castle, alive and more-or-less in one piece. Aww. I could swear I’ve read very similar setups in slash fanfics before... ;)
Okay but in all seriousness, this is supposed to be a story between Hanzo and MC, and I personally thought that that aspect of the ES was utterly fantastic! Literally everything Hanzo does with MC is super appealing (and super hot!!) - from playing with her early in the story, to calling her little mouse (I died, ngl), to coming home to MC after the battle, kissing her hair!!, and asking her to help him with Ieyasu’s salve. What a character! The shockingly functional relationship Hanzo was able to sustain with MC in this story almost makes me believe his MS’s happy ending could work. Almost. ^_^
Best quote: “Sing to your heart’s content..let your voice reach the greatest heights” - Hanzo auditioning for Phantom of the Opera
Best platonic scene: Hanzo and Sakai bonding over plants. Again. :)
Personal enjoyment: 10/10 (also that epilogue... 💕)
So those were my thoughts. What did y’all think? I’m curious to know! :)
Hi! Have you reviewed SLBP Masamune’s act 2? I wasn’t sure if I missed it. Thanks!
Hey anon!! Have no fear. You’ve missed nothing! I’ve yet to review Masa’s Act 2 :) If you’re looking for a hot take: I thought the plot itself had some flaws but Masa himself was generally amazing (although he really needs a therapist, the poor guy)!