months ago, the very thought of lanfear’s touch had made her flinch ; now, the slightest brush of fingers anchored her more firmly than anything else could. from endless visions of one seeking the other’s end, to becoming the only two souls capable of keeping one another afloat. & moiraine knew it was not merely the trauma they had endured, nor could she continue pretending their conversations — every hour spent together — had meant nothing at all. merely because they were both willing to look beyond it, towards a singular purpose ahead, did not mean it ceased to exist. & however gruesome the visions had been, they left moiraine contemplating how tightly their threads had woven themselves into the pattern, regardless of direction they may yet choose to keep them going, or however long they may yet be weaving them. never in her life had moiraine felt so diminished ; mentally, physically, emotionally. lanfear’s voice, weakened though it was, kept her tethered to herself. questions asked, answers exchanged, idle thoughts pondered — all of it kept her from slipping into the hollow those creatures had carved into her mind.
❝ not much has changed since then, ❞ she murmured, inclining her head faintly. few dared venture through, & many who sought knowledge there had never returned as well. & those who did return claimed the stated price was merely the smallest fraction demanded for whatever bargain one sought to strike. moiraine’s fingers traced the ivory bracelet that has been resting upon her left wrist all this time. even with the sa’angreal, she could scarcely reach so much as a trickle of the one power. she felt hollow. utterly drained. had it not been for the artefact, they might have consumed her entirely long ago. & some irrational part of her feared she might never feel whole again...
but then lanfear’s reminder rendered the exhaustion impossible to ignore. still, moiraine did not move at once, despite the quiet agreement of her nod. they should rest indeed. it was troubling enough to consider they might not soon find water or food. rest was the very least they could afford themselves before attempting whatever came next. though she suspected it would take days before she felt even partly herself again. still, her eyes refused to close, even as she settled against the wall behind her.
by then, her eyes had adjusted to the darkness, & when she turned towards the source of the fragile voice, they settled upon the pale softness of lanfear’s features. this time, there was little hesitation. shifting slightly, moiraine reached once more for lanfear’s hand, holding tightly as she eased herself beside her. even had the space been larger than necessary for one person alone, she would still have drawn nearer. she would still have pressed their foreheads together. ❝ just hold onto that, ❞ moiraine said quietly after a moment, as though lowering her voice might soften the understanding she held of lanfear’s fears. the very same tormented thoughts haunted her own mind, & each time they surfaced, her grip upon lanfear’s hand tightened instinctively. ❝ we are here now. & in time, we shall find our way out of this place. ❞ it was an anchor she herself desperately needed. & however she trembled at the thought of those heart-rending visions returning, she forced her eyes closed then, focusing instead upon the softness of lanfear’s skin, the warmth of their mingled breaths, & the firm clasp of their intertwined fingers. ❝ together, we shall figure something out. ❞ still, the oppressive weight hanging above them would not be so easily ignored. ❝ would you care to speak of it..? to get it out... ❞ the aes sedai asked softly then, uncertainty threading through the whisper.