incorrect euphoria

(but totally correct)

[outofcontexteuphoria]

kat: so, how’s your morning going?

jules: well, maddy asked me what my favorite color was, then told me i was wrong, so... pretty normal

[outofcontexteuphoria]

judge: you’re going to hell

rue: ugh, just because i’m gay?

judge: no, you killed nate jacobs

rue: ugh, just because i killed nate?

[outofcontexteuphoria]

lexi: i want to show you a picture from last night that really upset me

rue: in my defense, jules bet me 50 bucks i wouldn’t drink that shampoo

lexi: that’s not... you drank shampoo?!

[outofcontexteuphoria]

kat: so you’re gay?

jules: huh, no, i’m not

kat: you’re having a romantic relationship with rue

jules: you got me there

[outofcontexteuphoria]

rue: at my funeral there is going to be a closed casket and it will be opened to reveal that i am not inside. instead, they will turn on the ceiling fan and my lifeless body will swing around the room while the space jam theme song is playing in the background

rue: *glances at jules*

jules: *shakes her head*

rue: nevermind, jules says i can’t do that

[outofcontexteuphoria]

rue: sometimes i don’t realize an event was traumatic until i tell it as a funny story and everyone stares at me weirdly 

[outofcontexteuphoria]

lexi: i need you to swear-

rue: fuck

lexi: i meant promise

[outofcontexteuphoria]

nate: can i ask a dumb question?

maddy: better than anyone i know

[outofcontexteuphoria]

lexi: i fell for you

rue: lol get the fuck up

[outofcontexteuphoria]

maddy: hey, about that love letter you sent me

cassie: what about it?

maddy: the fourth sentence-

cassie: yeah, that’s where it gets emotional and-

maddy: you forgot a comma

[outofcontexteuphoria]

kat: hey jules, i like your top

rue: i have a name

kat, [spits drink]

[outofcontexteuphoria]

maddy: show me the ring

kat: you sound like gollum

maddy: that means nothing to me. i don't see those movies, i'm too pretty

[outofcontexteuphoria]

jules: babe, i’m not grabbing your boob, i’m grabbing your heart

rue: that’s my right boob tho

jules: babe

[outofcontexteuphoria]

mckay: you’re probably one of those beautiful women who doesn’t even know it

cassie: no, i know it

[outofcontexteuphoria]

lexi, [comes home from detention]

rue: you??? in trouble???

lexi: ˢᵒᵐᵉᵇᵒᵈʸ ᶜᵃˡˡᵉᵈ ʸᵒᵘ ᵉᵛᶦˡ ˢᵒ ᶦ ᵖᵘⁿᶜʰᵉᵈ ᵗʰᵉᵐ

rue:

rue, [voice cracking]: o-okay

[outofcontexteuphoria]

rue: i love jules… so much.... she's such an important part of my life... i wouldn't be the same without her... how can i convey that to her? 

rue:

rue, [sends jules a meme out of nowhere at 2am]

rue: perfect

[outofcontexteuphoria]

jules: i like your new pants

rue: thanks, they were 50% off!

jules: i’d like them better if they were 100% off

rue: the store can’t just give away clothes for free

jules: that’s not what i meant-

rue: that’s a terrible way to run a business, jules