The Surgeon’s Precision Is Nothing

Old black-letter, thou reasonest well. 29

[paaopalpoerepr33]

Whenever people want to comment something about the way I think of relationships/men I just remember that I have saved my own life and also literally, physically the lives of other children/women from men despite being a scared shitless 90 something pound girl. Like I have been thrown into so many situations that have forced me to protect myself or others I really don’t care what anyone thinks and I’m starting to trust myself in startling new ways which is really cool I think. Like secure attachment I guess. I still don’t really love myself, but I do know some things with a sense of conviction that I can vouch for with my own life and I’m like. Well I’m glad I’m a vessel for that I guess.

[ymutate]

Füsun Ürkün (Turkish Artist, born 1960)

"Ladybug", 2014.

Oil on Canvas, 25 × 30 cm.

Private Collection.

[paaopalpoerepr33]

One thing I’ve learned is also how to hold people thru conflict and I’m kind of really proud of it like my classmates are mostly white and very privileged and I’ve had to learn how to make them *see* me and it doesn’t always work, I used to throw tantrums and give up and I still do every now and then but I do still show up and try to kindly push on them to look at *us* but without letting it get to me, without internalizing it and being able to push forward knowing that it’s just an experiential thing and I’m so proud of that growth. Super painful to constantly have to accommodate for such privileged groups but like. Idk u get resilient. U get better at taking it with grace.

[paaopalpoerepr33]

When I look outside at myself I’m just like. Oh girl no wonder u intimidate everyone. You’ve never met anyone who is both smarter AND hotter than you since you moved here. You crush. You think a guy is hot and smart and they have small dicks or come in 5 minutes and are assholes. You meet a nice guy— less smart and is ugly and wears polo shirts. You go on hinge the academic guys are mostly balding and in STEM. The women who are mean to you at work are both less hot and deeply insecure about anybody coming up with a single thing they didn’t think of even when you’re both smart. You’re literally just better off single it’s alright. It’s all good just keep reading and writing and having fun.

[worldsandemanations]

Shadow Theater - Inari Krohn , 1989. Finnish, b. 1945

[thingsfromthedirt]

Cliff House, San Francisco (1906)

[questcequecestqueca]

Adolfo Kaminsky

[weepingwidar]

Marcelle Reinecke (American, 1989) - Backway Round (2024)

[greetingsfrommadrid]

[greetingsfrommadrid]

[sunlilys]

blood/sweat/tears, 2005

alison saar

[kafkasapartment]

Dinah Washington Waiting for Rehearsal to Start, 1958. Ted Williams. Pigment print.

[paaopalpoerepr33]

My goals:

- skin stuff

- own a banjo

- record player

- new TV

- finish furnishing apartment (another bookshelf, floor lamp, wall decor, a TOASTER maybe an air fryer)

- gold hoops

- stop doing everything at work/school late; build a solid daily work routine that way my evenings can be spent unwinding.

- start lifting weights, get buff

- savings

[paaopalpoerepr33]

Skin is purging rn I’m waiting till after tomorrow that I’m gonna be at the beach to do salicylic acid treatment. But I thought my skin was gonna look all pimply thru purging it’s just tiny whiteheads here and there and the sebaceous filaments sliding out here and there. Got a few stubborn blackheads out too but not enough that’s why I’m going in w that shit soon 😑

[paaopalpoerepr33]

No business looking this good when I’m acting like a cave goblin

[nobrashfestivity]

Leonor Fini, Figures on a Terrace, 1939

[smsomah]

Aït Atta; Jebel Azourki, Morocco. Scanned from the book Haut-Atlas: l'exil de pierres; 1982; photos by Philippe Lafond