What am I doing

19 AJ Live to Fight~Fight to Live Chronicles Of Syntax

[padfootandbegay]

I kinda forgot my Tumblr existed...nothing's changed and it's as shit as ever

[padfootandbegay]

I took a swan dive off a rope swing (unintentionally)

[padfootandbegay]

My bruised ribs got flagged by tumblr and their stupid system.

And yet, I’m still getting porn blogs messaging and following me on the daily.

Maybe focus on the real issues and not this shit

[helz-belz]

Man, B99 did Holt so right. He’s not just gay as lip service, he’s visibly gay. We see acknowledgement and dealing with homophobia and racism, and his success despite it. We see him advocating and supporting other queer black officers. We meet his husband, not just as a “here he is” but as an actual relationship. Kevin isn’t just a carbon copy of Raymond nor is he a comical opposite. They are similiar enough that you understand how they fell in love, but they are unique personalities. They have troubles and arguments, but stay together and support each other. Honestly they are one of the best on screen couples I’ve seen period, let alone a gay one. He’s also a stoic character who remains stoic while still warming up and having humour and connection with others, without changing his personality to make it easier for the writers. He’s an enjoyable character, and respectfully treated, and I love him and the writers and the actor.

[the-gif-princess]

[mythicalpiranha-moved-deactivat]

IM LAUGIHNG HARDER THAN EVER RIGHT THIS SECOND

[thischick25]

Reblogging this again because Chris just made me realize that sheep are so stupid that I can’t even think like them:

These sheep? They are actually running away from the car.

They are so stupid that they’re following each other in a circle around the thing they are running from.

[drtanner-dickery]

SHEEPNADO

[sharkbeneaththelotus]

when your group cohesion is set higher than your flee response distance.

[surfcommiesmustdie-deactivated2]

Moshpit

[nevergonnawalkpastafez]

This is actually called a sheep cyclone and it happens because sheep don’t have a hierarchy. In most herds, whichever animal is the leader will sense danger and take off running. The rest of the herd takes it’s cues from the leader and follows. Sheep, on the other hand, don’t have a leader. If the flock runs, they run, and they follow whatever fluffy tail happens to be in front of them. Usually, this works out fine for the sheep. Occasionally, however, the sheep in the front starts following the fluffy tail of the sheep in the back so the whole flock ends up running in circles, going nowhere fast.

[surfcommiesmustdie-deactivated2]

sheeps are morons lmao

[kayla-bird-deactivated20190505]

is this what the doggos are for

[0somethingcool0]

@gallusrostromegalus

[gallusrostromegalus]

This is, to my understanding, excactly WHY we have both herding and livestock guardian dogs.  Sheep are… really amazingly dumb most of the time.  

Then, once in a while, you get one sheep that’s Entirely Too Cunning and that’s when all hell breaks loose.

[padfootandbegay]

[nonasuch]

Yesterday I overheard someone talking about how he was taking classes at the University of Maryland because they offer free tuition if you’re over 60. 

My brain IMMEDIATELY began scripting a screwball comedy in which a broke millennial who desperately want to finish his long-abandoned degree but is drowning in student debt pretends to be a senior citizen in order to attend college for free.

I’m picturing someone Channing Tatumesque, applying age makeup every morning before he heads off to class. It’s sort of a cross between 21 Jump Street and Mrs. Doubtfire. He keeps forgetting which hip is supposed to be his bad one. His classmates laugh every time he uses slang. There’s definitely a scene where he attends a college party and busts it up on the dance floor.

He catches the eye of a fellow returning student, a woman in her 50s, but she thinks he’s like 70 and she’s already buried one husband, you know? She’s not interested in doing that again. When his charade unravels (hilariously) at the end of the movie, though, she finds out he’s actually like 30 and has abs you could bounce a quarter off. And he’s still super into her. And really, maybe it’s time she gave May-December romance a chance.

[nonasuch]

Okay so to refine this concept a little:

Our Hero is stuck in a job where he keep seeing people get promoted past him because they have a 4-year degree and he doesn’t. He can’t afford to go back to school until he finishes paying off his student loans for the degree he’s one semester from completing. If he got the promotion he wants he could pay them off a lot quicker. But he can’t get the promotion without the degree.

Along comes a clerical error in his almost-alma mater’s records which lists his birth year as 1948 instead of 1984. He gets a call from them about their “free tuition for seniors” program. “Wow, that sounds amazing!” he says. “I’ll be sure to tell my, uh, grandpa, as soon as he gets home.”

It’s one semester. If he can keep up the charade, he’ll have the degree, get the promotion, pay off the student loans. Hell, if they figure it out after the fact and come after him for the tuition, he’ll be able to afford it by then. He just needs to pass as a 70-year-old until graduation. How hard could it be?

(also, someone in the notes suggested “Senior Year” for a title, which is PERFECT.)

[cesaray]

[becughmitchell]

amy santiago pointing guns at people

[saltrat88]

[hecallsmebelovedx-deactivated20]

this is …. wow

[sexwitsockson]

LMFAO

[natural--lighting]

Wow

[naturalneeshia]

Had to watch this multiple times to understand wtf

[fineapplemango]

Chaotics canceling each other out

[baberscamille]

They paid for those chips as far as I’m concerned// #chaotic good

[flyingtentacledlampfucker-deact]

discuss

[dankmemesreasonforliving]

[ramoorebooks-deactivated2024011]

The writer's blessing:

May you write 1,500 words with ease. May your characters be lively and not cardboard. May you need little editing. May your muse visit you as soon as you sit. May the Internet not distract you much. May your phone lie dormant while you write.

[kmtarchive-deactivated20201028]

for real though… i’m starting to think andy samberg wants bi jake peralta as much as we do based on his acting choices

these .5 second shots may not mean anything……. but they mean everything to me, a bisexual, who recognizes her own kind

[milesgmoralles]

You should be wailing, you stone cold bitch!

[wisteria-wild]

[skyhon]

I hate you so much

[panstutteringbill]

This was very therapeutic for me UNTIL-

[isolate]

if you didn’t believe that England hates Donald Trump already: the most recent news of his visit today is that the mayor of London approved protestors releasing a £16,000 Trump in-a-diaper balloon to fly 98ft above ground when he visits, and literally no British person is surprised. Welcome to London.

[isolate]

I’m literally not kidding

[isolate]

the people who are managing the balloon are called trump babysitters. I’ve never loved my country more.

[eligantly]

i fucking love this country. Trust us to make the president feel welcome

[isolate]

the best part about this is that trump expected to have a royally welcome visit but as soon as he made an appearance, thousands of angry British people started chanting “fuck trump!” on repreat for hours.

[eligantly]

UPDATE: Trump has managed to generate a bigger crowd than Obama did, but for all the wrong reasons. The entirety of London is filled with angry anti-trump protestors, to the point where he is refusing to make an appearance due to fear for his safety.

[isolate]

Here are some fucking awesome protest signs being shown today. I hope we’ve made you proud!

[teacupfulofstarshine]

england, you’re doing amazing, sweetie, this made me so happy

[ironwoman359]

Ok, i’ve been seeing these all over today and I’ve been very happy, but I think “Trump wears poorly tailored suits” is the most hilarious and utterly British insult I’ve seen all day. It’s lovely.

[lyrics-are-my-blood-deactivated]

@just-call-me-lizard I figure that you would love this. Especially the first sighn

[bingomann]

ok but imagine a roomba that’s programmed to react positively when being scratched or petted 

[bingomann]

#or a roomba that’s programmed to recognize their owner and drive up to them for no other reason than to be petted

[bingomann]

roomba company, please make this happen

[fire-is-her-water]

I have a Neato Botvac that has an optical sensor to find its way around (Roombas just bump into things and derps off in a random direction) and yesterday it did its “dee-dummm” sad noise while under the couch, stopped what it was doing, and hummed over to me and stopped beside my chair, with its error message saying, “Please dust me off so I can see.” I wiped it off and sent it on its way, and it did its “doo doo do doooo!” of happiness and finished the living room. It’s never done that before, but I like to think that I’ve gained its trust over the past few months, and it knows it can come to me for help.