27 @pakenasty - Tumblr Blog

and like always you’re there when i need you most. what i feel for you transcends love thank you for truly being a friend

hope you’re okay. nothing has changed or will ever change. still cryin, still dying

#me

happy birthday im sorry for how it is. think about you often

I believe in the people alot less than I would like to admit to anyone or myself. That makes me so familiar yet so foreign with disappointment, ya know? I’ve lost people that I’ve known for longer than I didn’t know, I’ve seen death from a different angle, I’ve lost (I fucking hate losing) and I’ve accomplished. None of this feels too big or to small a few seconds after the moments they are in end, but during its world shattering. I’m so sensitive and so emotional like to the extreme but now I’m trying to figure out if that’s genuine or what I make myself. These days, feelings, experiences all blend together. Does everyone think about what happened or is it just me? I am but a sum total of the past and a blind entrance into the future. I guess that’s what I’ve started to question; did I ever change or am I just the person I’ve always been in a different place in time. “If I ever said I love you then I still mean it no matter what” I’ll never know if I meant that, no amount of emotional understanding or maturity will make that phrase clear for me. One day I will be calm, one day I won’t be sad, one day I won’t be confused, one day I’ll have an answer, one day I’ll relax. But not today, everything I feel is as fake or real as I believe in that moment. I hope fate is kind to you. Love you endlessly.

#me

i love missing people it remind me im a real person when I think im not

if you ever need me just call. if you ever miss me im close