“So I was in the fifth grade, right, and our teacher told us that we were to write a report. I love this concept. I’m not sure what that’s supposed to prepare you for in life. Writing a report. It’s not…it’s not…a business report. It’s writing about something you feel passionate about that you that want to share with other people. I’m not sure that the rest of the world after elementary school encourages you to actually do that. But…but so I mean…I remember going, ‘Aww man, I’m going to write about dragons.’ Cause I was a young man who loved dragons. And unicorns. That’s right. Magical and mystical things. But I had a lot of experiences as I went along through late childhood and adolescence that sort of…hardened my skin a little…and put a crust around my heart. So when a girlfriend of mine, one of the sweetest people I’d ever known, gave me a coffee cup with a unicorn on it as like the first present that we had exchanged, my eighteen year old self looked at it like, ‘I used to like that stuff as a kid.’ And immediately, the voice of my younger, truer self convicted me and said, “Have you betrayed the noble unicorn? Who sought only the best for you? Who wronged you in no way? Whose innocence you have turned your back on?’ But I had not entirely, and I drank from that coffee cup until it broke. This is called ‘Unicorn Tolerance.’”
— John Darnielle









