| She/they | 20+ | Mature blog | Basically a journal? |
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@pandannon
| She/they | 20+ | Mature blog | Basically a journal? |
I have an idea for a story. A three part introspective look at two friends (MFC and MAC) who find themselves on opposite sides of a hero/villain fight á la boku no academia style.
Chapter one starts with an epic battle battle rages and MFC sees MAC she thought died years ago, but standing with the villains. We see MFC working through the loss of MAC through flashbacks of her hero friends mid-battle. The hero friends try to protect her as she breaks down. Hero friends recognize MAC from MFC’s stories but are convinced it’s a trick and retreat to regroup. We start to see the undertones of the explorative hero industry as the young heroes’ boss forces everyone back into the battle. After all, MFC experienced what they thought was the death of MAC at 16 and was recruited to hero college the next day. Going back into the fray, MFC comes across a villain who exploits her power’s weakness and starts to really hurt her. MAC comes to the rescue, furious and protective.
Yep, it’s touch-her-and-die meets friends-to-ennemie?-to-lovers.
Then MAC knocks out and kidnaps MFC, yeah it’s a bit dark too, but in the hot indulgent way.
Chapter two is from MAC’s pov, as we see how the friends survived together (ie MFC saving MAC from a suicide attempt, then making hero dreams together, MAC’s dreams being dashed because they have a power ‘unfit for a hero’ etc). Leading up to MFC waking up in MAC’s house.
Chapter three is the emotional reunion and coming clean about what happened over the past four years.
Hero friends include:
Howard (Howie) he/him - flashback includes him transferring to a different hero college. MFC helped him petition for transfer, and they celebrate together. Howie encourages MFC to transfer as well, MFC declines because she made promises to MAC to achieve certain things in their hometown. MFC carries around MAC’s notebook where all their childhood drawings and dreams are.
Oliver (Oli) he/him - robot
Mist they/them - bday
Makayla she/her - tbd
Shashi she/he - tbd
MFC (name tbd) she/her
MAC (Noor) they/them
Not doing too good fam
Ahhh nauseous-hungry, we meet again.
Repotted my aloe and he’s doing much better now.
Big emotions for my soft little heart.
Everything is ok. I am ok. Things are going well.
I just can’t seem to catch a break.
Right now I am fighting with the universe for every scrap of happiness I’m getting. And the second I let me guard down, all that happiness gets snatched right back up from me.
Yeah nope that’s enough. I’ve had enough.
God I’m such a weak and terrible person. I wish I was better at all this. I just need to deal with it and get the fuck over myself.
This too shall pass.
Feeling quite down at the moment.
My cousin is visiting, which should be a good thing, but he is wholly unimpressed with everything that I am showing him. It’s just brining up feelings of inadequacy and regret. I have some knots in my chest thinking about my family and trips that are supposed to be a ‘once in a lifetime’ sorta deal and disappointment and guilt.
I would like to think that I am a hard working a determined person. But with a lack of clear directions or steps to achieve a goal, I’m truly floundering.
I know taking time to rest is equally as important as powering through, but I feel like I’m grasping at straws here, running in circles. I can’t turn my panic response off.
I feel like I’m doing something wrong.
Yesterday was rough. Really suffering from feelings of isolation and abandonment. Everything turned out ok in the end (by pure chance), but it left my nerves in tatters. And now I kinda just feel numb. Like all my thoughts are just slipping through my head. Ugh. Idk.
Well, that explains a lot…
I found out last night that I have been obliviously third-wheeling my friend and (what I was under the impression was) a mutual acquaintance for the past month.
I’m so over and done with this little part of my life. I want to move on so badly.
Two more days.
I’m actually not doing too well. I feel trapped. I feel like I’m wasting time. I feel empty. I know that I feel like this every once in a while, but it’s so much harder now that you are not around. I can’t tell you how much I’m struggling. One because it’s not your fault and you are not responsible for my moods or how I’m feeling. And two because I don’t want to impede on your time away. I hope you are having a good time because I sure as hell am not. But at least if I can imagine you doing well it makes the hurt more manageable.
It’s not your fault. I’m sorry.
There are words that I can’t even say here. Because I’m too afraid of putting the bad sad vibes out into the world. But isn’t that the whole point of this? To just put it out there so it gets out of my head.
Ugggghhhhh so fricken sad. Im sorry, I don’t want to be but I am.
I’m so sad and I don’t know what to do about it.
This post genuinely altered the trajectory of my life and how i make a lot of my decisions and i think about it so much
In my little box.
I want to leave but tomorrow’s the day so gotta put in the work.
Feeling alone but being bothered by the wrong people : (