im JUDE i draw PICTUREs and wear CUTE CLOTHES :) and POST WORDS AND SOMETIMES IMAGES,,,,,,,,,,, ! :) i like indiepop (c86/twee mainly) and other things…. you cna look at my inages @fagboyfriend and my face #jude pansyfem irl and my song recs @upforabit or my nsft if you like me like that yknowww (18+) @faggot-pussy
t4t + fat + queer + femme + ftm, HE/HIM. bisexual but like reallllly transmasc4transmasc leaning. TME and White. chronically ill cane user 💥 fat boy fall all year round 🫶 worlds most art student looking art student ever 🤯 i listent o the magnetic fields 🙏👍💖
^jude and jude art
Disclaimers and Q & A :
DO NOT they/them me. don’t call me neutral terms instead of masculine ones. please don’t say stuff about how my gender is weird and exotic, complimentary or otherwise. [i DO NOT like “you are so gender” AND “I’m stealing your gender” AND SIMILAR STATEMENTS] I am a binary trans man, I just enjoy dressing femininely !
I don’t really tag anything, so there will be moderate nsfw and violence from time to time (elaborated on later) . Usually I don’t reblog full on porn to main but post a lot about sexual topics and themes and reblog nudity and etc. if you do not want to see these things do not follow me!
I have a lot of mental health disorders, namely BPD. I am not yet fully healed from a recent breakdown and sometimes i post potentially triggering things in the middle of an episode. (vents, references to suicide/self harm, starting to fish for attention a lot or posting really sexual stuff on main…) I am really working on breaking this habit, but just know that it happens, i will be alright, i have a great support system. ok? 👍 In general, i talk about my mental health a lot.
Q: How long have you been on HRT/been transitioning?
As of this september (2026), i will have been out as trans for 10 years, starting age 12. As of this febuary I will have been on T for 7 years, starting age 14. (I had six months of blockers before T) I had top surgery 5 years ago at age 17.
Q: Where do you get your clothes?
Various places. Mostly online. Some are from small artists I like, usually bought through Kei Collective. But most are from depop. I search terms like ‘maximalism’ ‘rainbow’ ‘psychadelic’ and so on and so on. I also look for brands like: Lazy Oaf, Big Bud Press (my GOAT), Lucy and Yak, Kina and Tam, Beautiful Genius (!!!), Nooworks, Magic Society, Fashion Brand Company, Outsiders Division…. all brands listed are quite pricy. So i reccomend getting them secondhand like i do, the quality is great for all brands i listed. I try my very best to avoid fast fashion and shop at smaller brands as well as mostly buy secondhand. I consider my style to be a mix of maximallism, dopamine dressing, decora kei (or at least i used to do decora), and general colorful fashion. I love mixing patterns and wearing the brightest thing you’ve ever seen.
Q: How do people react to your outfits? Is it safe?
People do laugh at me or yell at me. But i don’t let it get to me. I “Pass” usually as a cis man. At least thats what most people tell me. I live in a blue state that is one of the more trans friendly places in the country. So most people are confused but kind. I do not go to redder areas or places where i may be vulnrable dressed like this. I do go to doctor’s appointments, school, and pretty much everwhere but funerals dressed like this.
Q: Ketamine?
When i post about Ketamine, I am referring to Ketamine/Esketamine Therapy. This can be done for several different diagnoses, but for me, i recieve it for my treatment resistant severe depression. It boots my mood and keeps me stable. I have done both Internasal Esketamine (Spravato) and Ketamine IV infusions, mostly spravato but i am hopefully going to start regular infusions soon. If you have any questions, ask them, but I am not a doctor or an expert, I am one guy who responds to this medicine.
I also had a failed course of ECT (Electroconvulsive Therapy) , which was completely misrable for me.
Q: What are you studying?
I am Projected to graduate December 2026. I am at a small art school. I major in ‘Writing and Visual Narrative’ which is essentially an interdisciplinary arts program with a bit more writing and storytelling classes than other students. I love it because I have gotten to take classes across departments and I love to write. I do a mix of illustration, painting, sculpture and beadwork.
ugh i did have another convo with my mother where i said something along the lines of “My depression is at a severity much higher than most people with depression, my doctors have told me its chronic and life long” and she basically accused me of pitying myself too much and believing that i have it worse than everyone else. no, i just am stating a fact i have been told by medical professionals. i dont think i have it harder than anyone else, but i do have a severe case. ok
like, saying that i am going to be suicidal the rest of my life isn’t being pessimistic, it’s the likely outcome that my doctors have told me. this is a disability!!
ugh i did have another convo with my mother where i said something along the lines of “My depression is at a severity much higher than most people with depression, my doctors have told me its chronic and life long” and she basically accused me of pitying myself too much and believing that i have it worse than everyone else. no, i just am stating a fact i have been told by medical professionals. i dont think i have it harder than anyone else, but i do have a severe case. ok
i have also learned that i am 90% a sub and while i am capable of being the forward one in the relationship, it ends up hurting me if i’m the only one making moves. I don’t want to do that again. I want to be with someone who cherishes me. Who pursues me. Who takes the time to engage in my interests. Who can sweep me off my feet. i hope that comes some day
i do have to remind myself that if i stay alive, one day i may be in a loving, reciprocal t4t relationship with someone who takes the time to understand me and listen to me. one day
took 1.5 days for transmascvoicesproject to call the trans woman whose project idea he stole & twisted into a transmisogynistic premise, "a modern, digital-age charles manson" (direct quote) and start framing her as a cruel, manipulative villain (a serial killer cult leader n*zi in this case!!!!) and herself as the innocent victim. so much for claiming to have no transmisogynistic biases holy fucking shit
hi jude did you know that theres many different regional versions of horchata
i did not. but i will be very honest for a second i don’t think ive ever had horchata and im not sure why they serve it at restraunts i frequent i just have never ordered it
i once did a 3 month dbt intensive outpatient program but it was like2020 so all everyone talked about was dreamsmp & i blocked out the entirety of it. traumatizing. worsened my bpd.
oh thats awful. in mine there was just a lot of conversation about how men should provide for women by my fellow patients. for some reason
hey i experienced a similar thing with one of my exes. I would check in a lot and be assured over and over that things were consentual and i was wanted only to be told later that she was fawning and didn't actually want the things she emphatically said yes to. It's rough. it's also not your fault. whatever damage your ex had that made them say yes to stuff they didn't want wasn't caused by you, thats baggage from their own life and its their responsability to heal from it, not yours. you will find someone who genuinely wants you and won't be afraid to say no when they need to.
thank you <3 i really appriciate it
i think it just fucks with me to think that he hates me for it. I really strongly dislike him myself, yeah. but its a situation i have talked to countless people about, medical professionals and friends and family, and no one other than him thinks i did anything wrong. I really just hope he gets help. He clearly struggles just like me, but I was the only one doing something about it (when we were together, at least.)
i think theres this unfair assumption in society that the person who initates romantic connections is the person with the power. but its a two way street. He had the power to communicate with me and tell me he wasn’t into me, but instead he chose not to, which hurt both of us. I’m a stickler for consent, i checked in often. It’s not my fault that he was dishonest with me.
I’ve learned from that relationship that It’s not healthy for me to have to take the lead 100% of the time, nor is it healthy to be with a partner who cannot communicate. It’s a learning experience, but it really messed me up. I felt like a monster for months afterwards. Even though all it was was kissing and talking, i felt like i had overlooked something that was purposely hidden from me.
