I guess I missed the moral of that story
Drops of Jupiter shuffled on
And I remember
All the lyrics
To the very first song a boy said I reminded them of
And I was a vegetarian in high school 😹
How could he miss me- fried chicken & soy lattes
Bonkers

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@paperbagnotes
I guess I missed the moral of that story
Drops of Jupiter shuffled on
And I remember
All the lyrics
To the very first song a boy said I reminded them of
And I was a vegetarian in high school 😹
How could he miss me- fried chicken & soy lattes
Bonkers
Anger is all so ugly
Everyone makes their own bed.
And no matter how shit or bug infested
They’ve created their own existence
And eventually they have to lie down in it
I’ve put everything in my past behind me
Over come WAY more than this petty bullying
All I have is the present
And to worry about our planet
I won’t waste any more time or writing
On things that have happened
Why carry it out longer when it won’t be in my future
I really feel sorry for those people
Who don’t have lives, who aren’t living
Or appreciate the good things they have
Ugliness really is a disease
And no fame money or plastic surgery can fix it
Idk how many lies have been told about me
I don’t care what they are
As long as those people stay in hell away from me
As far as fucking possible from my energy
And just out of my way entirely
They don’t want to deal with that after math
I’m more powerful than numbers or stats
If I wasn’t so valuable to the world, people wouldn’t be using me to make their own miserable lives more important
Please, be reasonable, I have way better things to do or even think about, even sitting on my ass is more useful
then talk to anyone I don’t want to
What a waste of breathe
And this precious life we’re given
Such Idiots
Idc what happens to them
Let alone anything they have to do with
If I was any different I probably wouldn’t be secretly laughing.
If I didn’t know what comes next for me maybe I’d actually truly be angry
But you only scratched me
A childish of damage as any
I’ll be over it in the morning
The world is opening up for me
And I know what’s coming is going to make me so happy
You can stay miserable, perpetuating the same cycle
I would have helped you, wanted the best for you
Instead you’re ungrateful, doomed to always be miserable
You mean less to me than I do to you
My writings always been better
Among more important things
Like my pure soul
You’re bothered, have something to prove
I don’t care about the same things you do
And to me
That’s a blessing
I’m actually free
EVIL TWIN
No more poems will reference him.
If he’s looking - any line he steals from me
Or idea for a song from me or my poetry
will be cursed beyond his comprehension
His soul will distort beyond recognition
He can try to rip me off (AGAIN)
Keep reading
Nothing from this day forward will be about him
He’s sold his soul to demons for a long weekend
Sealed his fate with his own hate
I won’t even give him the satisfaction
Of publishing a word about him
You can say that again
Bye & Good luck he’s gonna need it
But he’ll never receive it
Careful who you cross next time, they may be able to hex better than I can, hedonist.
Remember you chose this
Im so glad i found someone nothing like him
Even if it’s not forever,
Even if it is only just a glimpse
Its worth millions of him
To simply know what exists
To get a chance to know a real man I’d sacrifice his decomposing soul over and over again
The world won’t know his name the same
He can be the one who bleeds until empty
No one is ever going to touch him like I can
That is my peace with this.
Problematic - you hate yourself I see
See what comes from you crossing me 🤷
Dare ya to
No one would need to lie on my name unless I was intimidating
If you didn’t believe I was above you, I wouldn’t even be on your radar
You don’t cut people down who you don’t believe are a threat
And try to spread defamation about those you are not scared by their existence
You don’t try to silence somebody unless you’re afraid of them talking
Because you have guilt and shame for how YOUVE behaved
You feel jealous and angry at people who you feel hurt by
If I have never even spoken to you, you’ve never met me
And I have nothing to do with you
If you hate me or spread lies on me
You have no idea how protected I am
Because even coming after me
I don’t hate you
I don’t even dislike you
I don’t even consider you
You are beneath me
We are not equals
Because I am kinder than you
I’m dealing with my own world
I’m dealing with what is meant for me and who I’m suppose to be
I don’t know your names or your faces and I’m not interested or hateful
I have been before
I’ve been so angry with no outlet to give it to
I’ve done things or said things I’m not proud of
To someone who didn’t deserve it
Cried my pain to those who would listen
When I regret it
But not to him or anyone he’s got fooled
I regret having any involvement at all
If I knew how down right nasty the energy
I would have stayed away from the echo entirely
Meeting him has done nothing but hurt me
Hasn’t given me a single thing I need
I don’t need to lift a finger
I’m not out to destroy my own life
And those who try to will only sink theirs lower
Say what you want about me
But each lie is laced in venom
A pretty face doesn’t mean a soul that deserves to reach its goal
Or given grace for being rotten?
You don’t reach happiness with hate
even worse when you’re values are horrid
You’re so much drama it’s disgusting
I could throw up from it
It’s only upsetting because I believed him to be so much better than this
Boy was I as wrong as one can fucking be
I’m not miserable
But everything having to do with him has been
I thought he was sweet
Turns out he’s cruel and unkind
Not like mine
He must really hate himself
And everyone he keeps around him must hate themselves too
Because I know who I am
And I don’t let things like this under my skin
I don’t even care what you can infer from this
Have a nice life sure whatever
Or don’t I really don’t care anymore
you’ve finally crossed my line
And now all I think
Is that you were someone nice to look at only
An empty face
Soulless and wrapped up in him self
Selfish, borderline sociopathic
With no depth and you’re the one who’s dead
I wouldn’t even sink my teeth in
Thank you for alienating me and being a complete bully
I stuck up for you.. how wrong I was
To be rude to a real love
For someone so rude
Thanks for showing me finally how wrong I can be about someone
I don’t need anymore nails in my coffin, thanks
It won’t happen again honey
My love and me
I want to give to him when or where he isn’t
I want to fill in the blanks for him
I want to hold his hand and walk him through anything he doesn’t want to do alone
I want to show him he is capable of anything
That I am more than worthy of his love
That it is not him or I on that pedestal
But our connection held high
That my love for him
And his love for me
Is what makes us both shining
That he is beyond enough
Because of my love
And I am greater than I believe
Because he loves me
That there is nothing I wouldn’t do for him
And there is no length he wouldn’t go to save me
On sad days I want to be his smiling face
On bad days I want him to remind me my grace
I want to support him in every way possible
And feel his immense apprication for me
I can make it all about him
Because that’s honoring my wishes
I don’t want the spotlight
I don’t want it to be about me but secretly
I want him to focus on me
So immeasurably that my wish is his command
And I wish for it to be about him mainly
For us to be what is worked on
For our connection to never waver and only grow stronger
If he blames me I will ask him what I am doing
If I feel neglected any he will be there to remind me he’s just busy and still loves me
My dreams will become our reality
And any accomplishment he sets out to conquer
Will be a success I reinforce further
I will always remind him when he is tired or wary or confused that he has all the clues
Nothing is out of reach for who
That this one life has blessed him with all of his wildest dreams
Together we’ll be unstoppable
We have the same goal
I talked about you for the first time today
I didn’t say your name
No gossip or details
The person I was speaking to
Told me I was glowing
I glow when I talk about you
You make me that happy
He doesn’t need to be the best looking man in world
To be the best looking man in the world to me
He doesn’t need to be the best singer to grace a stage
To be the best performer to me
He doesn’t need to play the guitar better than anybody
To be who plays the guitar best with me
He doesn’t need to be the tallest or the biggest, or the fittest
To have a body perfectly fit for me
He doesn’t need fame or following
For me to think he’s my favorite person in the world
He doesn’t need to cure cancer, or have the worlds highest iq
To make real change in this world for the better
He doesn’t need to have the largest heart metaphorically
To be able to love me endlessly and have it grow insurmountably
He doesn’t need me to mean much to anybody
For me to mean the world to him singularly
He doesn’t need saving
For me to protect him
All these things apply to me too
He loves me all the same as well
Any day, any time
We feel the same, because I know it to be true
We feel it in our bones
Like we feel music in our soul
I have more murder in my soul than most know
You think I’m fit for just anybody
I’ve died at the hands of-
And I’ve taken in self defense
And you’ve never been camping??
I am a survivalist
Don’t you think any of this
Would have been the death of me already
I HAVE died by all of this
Somehow in this life
For whatever is to come of it
I’m still kicking
How lucky I would be if he truly loved me
All the tension leaves my face imagining
I’d be the happiest girl in the world
To receive his love
Naked time I shout
As I shake his collar in front of him
He’s on his hind legs
He’s jumping
Tongue flailing
We are dancing
He loves something so simple
My dog with a collar
Would do anything for me
He’s my obedient
But that makes me his queen
I wouldn’t trade these moments for anything
They involve seeing me
And me existing
No worry about a masculine expression or delicacy
a beauty unable to see
Just enjoying what’s happening
I realized in this life time
Centuries old was our stories told
We made a promise
To see each other again
To never lose sight of our spirit
But there has been no lock and key
Nothing saying you belong to me
Spirit of fire always
A soul so strong together we are not to keep
Burning villages so we can speak
No sacrifice too many
A fight at the end of the day
For more than just the love we carry
Something angry
Throats slit for the pure question of it
I know you feel me
I know you can make sense of this
The fight we’ve been through
Made sense back then
The craziness
A devotion that can only be described as honor
We would never have left each other
That’s why now it’s so unsettling
Because here we are living another love story
I have not had many lovers
In lifetimes what felt most inert and stable
Was what was least present
Then easy to accept and be absent of
The fight is between us
Because we are not perfect
A sword been forged for eternity
In so many bodies
You have protected me
Been led to me
Time and time again
But in these half of our stories
We must accept
Being with some body else
Someone more safe
Who won’t endanger us
In a time worse
But safer
Our love puts eachother at risk
We’ve never been granted peace
Other than when we let
Others love us
When you’ve allowed experiences out of our own protect(ion)
Alcohol - drugs - society & psychology
Other worlds we had dirt and mud
Huts on battle fields
On cots I’ve cleaned your wounds
I see you beyond what anyone else knows
Because I’ve cured your scars
Here I only tried to soothe you
But where we came from
We were not royalty
I was the nurse to your knight
And we both suffered
But our love was brighter
We fought for any second of love we could share
The pain we felt was all from over coming
I see a story I don’t know is true
But there is fact, that
I cared for you
And you hated everything that wasn’t me
You still are so annoyed with humanity
I’ve only loved the two of you
In life times unbeknownst to me
A prince admiring me but not always serving
Here he can be a man, I can help him
Here you are lost and unable to allow me to
I can’t remind you this time
I tried too
You know me
You know me
And you know what I’m capable of
I would never control or force you like I have before-
To take medicine
To let me gauze your gashes
Here you almost hate me
Because you wish you didn’t love me
Because I am too tired
We are both more worn in
Easily tempered and tantruming
A confusion
There’s just enough space
For us to see
But not act on it
In this world..
I am allowed to be with him
I don’t save as many
But you do less harm, less done to you
That’s our holy water, our silver lining
This isn’t the first time I’ve seen you
I see you always
In every life
You see me too
I could have run
Could have avoided the whole thing
But you always captivate me
I’ve cried here more for the taking
Then each story where you were taken from me
I knew you were mine
And I knew he was too
But here neither of you are
Because you’re shadows of eachother
Stories I’m so grateful for
But he simply loves me
Doesn’t know the realm of the devil you both carry with clairvoyance uncanny 
He doesn’t know how to hate
And he is half of my souls purpose
He needs me.
My purpose to fulfill
My time to be his knight
More than both you and your doppelgänger could comprehend here sadly
Because you both have always protected me
He wants to, but he needs it more from me
And I have to rise up
I have to be so much
That I can save him.
I am so grateful
for you, and for him
Tears fill my eyes for how many lives
I would be in demise
So much sooner than I’ve ever thought possible
But you’ve protected me always
And that’s why
In this life you still aggressively
Pushed me away
So I could love him
I wouldn’t have if either of you had chosen me
But here you are enraged by me
Here you allowed me to choose him
You begrudgingly let me
Knowing if you hadn’t
I never would
Your love for humanity
Is allowing me to see
What it’s like with somebody
You have enough faith
In how much I love thee
That you actually have a morbid curiosity
In seeing
If he can actually make me happy
If I would choose him
But the thing your hard heart doesn’t see
Is..
No mater how much I can love him
How much he can over take me
Just as you can clearly
That it doesn’t change a single thing
About how deeply I have fondly loved you
And how ingrained in me it is
To always want what’s best for you
You’ll meet someone more boring too
Someone who doesn’t see what I do
But sometimes maybe a simpler life
Means we both can breathe
Live easy
In this life you will get all of your dreams
It pains me to see you still unhappy
Thinking another will solve it
But they are not me
And he is not you
You are eachother
And somewhere out there my twin exists
Happy family
But right here, and now
We are experiencing limerence
We take drugs
And we want to become material things
I’ve overcome so much
I feel your touch
Hands on my chest
But your actions here
Are not what he would have ever done then
So you are not him
Who he was who loved
You’ve chosen himself
And I find solace in that
It won’t be another women
It will always be yourself
And I am at peace with that
What scares you
Is you know, me choosing myself
Means choosing someone who would always choose me
Even when I’m not choosing them
They are happy I choose anyone
As they think I deserve love regardless of the one
And that makes it him
You clenched me to tightly
As I did for/to you
Almost as if you were afraid of me
And I scared of you
Now I have no choice
I have to choose too
But to truly terrify you
I wish it wasn’t this way my love
But I lived so many lives
Scared for you
Now scared of you
It’s your turn to exist
In a world
You know what that feels like
I love you
I will always love you
And you know that’s true
It terrifies you
As much as thinking
It’s never a possibility
Having faith
When it’s never worked out before
When I’ve always been hurt or worse
Feels almost as painful as heart break
It’s easier to doubt
But that would be the biggest mistake I’d ever make
If every bad and traumatic thing
Led me to this moment
To put me on this path to see him
I need to trust in it
I need to give all of myself up to it
Release it from my grasp
Let go of any expectations
And just pray
Peace must wash over me
It must consume me
With all my strength
I need to rise to this
I need to know I’m almost alien
That I am so rare and unique
I was made for somebody
Who was also made for me
That there’s even more than I can even imagine
This world is a dream
Some escape all suffering
I can be one of them
His eyes are the brightest I’ve ever seen
I once saw some similarly
When I was a preteen.
My first crush as a baby
And the first man I ever dated
Green eyes that shined
But none have ever compared to him
I see the same glowing
Feel the same sensations
But there’s something that happens
It’s not a feeling I can describe in my body
It’s not any one single thought my brain thinks
It’s a whole experience beyond my bodies capabilities of comprehending
As if I’m climbing through a window
Or answering the door
And what’s on the other side is beyond my comprehension
It’s something I could take my whole life deciphering
It’s greater than words or pictures
It feels like something I’ve spent my whole life searching
But never realizing until I saw them
That’s what I was missing
I felt so lost looking
Because I didn’t know what, who or where
Always assuming or questioning (settling)
But he’s right there
It’s through his eyes
It’s through mine
It’s greater than anything I could have ever imagined
I’m struck down, seeing stars
Think I’m delirious, easily called crazy
The most exhilarating and eye opening thing to ever happen to me
Terrifying because nothing I’ve ever known
Has been both
Beyond intense and blissfully comforting
Safe and secure
I’m choosing to trust it
Put my whole soul into it
Everything I have inside of me,
And everything around me
Everything surrounds this
Everything