Those are the best kind

Jonathan Austin Parker Reactive adaptation/evolution - Ability to develop a resistance or immunity to whatever they were injured by or exposed to. Jonathan has been determined to follow in his deceased fathers footsteps. His sister, the soul survivor of his family’s tragic accident, has been a constant reminder of what he’s lost. He struggles to remain close to her but forced to do so by one of her friends, and his best friend, Ella Hart. To everyone he knows, Jonathan is a pompous asshole. His insensitive comments and harsh reviews in the paper cause for a rift in his friendships. He doesn’t change who he is for anyone and strives on this fact. Even if it’s a lie when applied to Ella.

[parkathan-blog]

[parkathan-blog]

GUESS WHO IS BACK CUM GUZZLERS?!

[parkathan-blog]

Text Message @ Jetta

Jon: Send nudes plz I got a new phone and lost your old ones

Charlie: You got the wrong number Parker.

Jon: I want your nudes. NOWWWW

[parkathan-blog]

Text Message @ Jetta

Jon: Send nudes plz I got a new phone and lost your old ones

[handcrafted-in-germany]

[parkathan-blog]

I genuinely miss you all so much.

[wavyandweird-deactivated2015041]

Visit Original Link

[parkathan-blog]

You see it's leaders and there's followers But I'd rather be a dick than a swallower

[gifmanip]

[brokenbeat]

[faithlehne]

[peterparker-spiderman-blog]

Visit Original Link

[parkathan-blog]

Braxton @ Everyone

Braxton: Hey nudes?

Jon: Dick shot?

[parkathan-blog]

You're in the car, switching channels on the radio when you hear a song that makes you go "OH SHIT, THAT'S MY JAM!" What song is it?

Boats and Birds, dude!

[montgomery-noelle-blog]

Guess who's back.

[parkathan-blog]

Better question, how long until you leave again?

[ella-hart]

Things to never do again

[ella-hart]

Couldn’t see your tiny boy man parts from my spider-monkey position on your back.

I thought all Brits had weird royalty fantasies though, that have too many buck teeth, and weird horsey shit. 

[parkathan-blog]

Yeah, and I remember that too well. You're essentially the reason I probably have scoliosis. So, cheers! You're forever ruined my pristine body. 

And who knows what fucking brits like. They are just all horrible. They're named stupid shit like Nadine and they watch Glee way too much and ship Faberry. They are just horrible people. We are better off without the lot of them!

[ella-hart]

Things to never do again

[ella-hart]

No, I’m saying that I have a photo story of your ass, that will never be finished so continue twirling, and maybe do some lunges. 

Mr Parker, I make this association because you used to run around my living room, spider climbing the plush “buildings” in your little spidey suit. 

[parkathan-blog]

If you remember that, then I'm sure you remember how great my package looked in said suit. I had to think of the queen to keep my tiny boy boner down.

[ella-hart]

Things to never do again

[parkathan-blog]

hella-hart:

Hmmm, I could never consider you as another comic book character other than Spiderman, I think it has something to do with your bubble butt.   

Are you saying you've noticed my butt? I should turn around in front of you more often.

And you're only saying I'm Spiderman because by some weird coincidence, my last name is Parker.