Main || Open Characters || Full Plot || Rules || Apply
“What side are you on?”
740 years ago, Varamadras Itaul, Lord of the Demons, declared war on the Goodlands, a military alliance between the most important countries in the Fifth Gate. The war continues to rage on through bloody and destructive battles, but none come closer to their goal.
At the side of Varamadras fight the DracoMancers, his elite group of Magicians, and universally known as the bad guys. Their rivals are the Knights of Jewantes, an old guild of rich Magicians. The two groups have been fighting each other ever since the DracoMancers were created, clashes are inevitable. King Karadas Uef I of Trolian, one of the most ambitious kings of the Goodlands, is willing to move forward. He plans to take HagaFosiel, now the most important city in the war, back with the force of the Knights. The rawest powers in the Fifth Gate are bound to face each other in a fight till death.
Magical Enemies is a RPG with prompts, assignments, writing challenges, battles and interesting plot developments.
Hey there, can we have a first look review? Please & thanks :)
You got it.
The red on your page is…aggressively red. By that I mean, the brightness of the red provides a stark contrast to the black and grey background and by doing so, gives off an almost aggressive kind of feel. That was the first thing I noticed and since I have yet to read anything else, I’m not sure if that’s the kind of feel you’re going for.
Well, now that I actually have read the side plot and a bit of the full plot, it’s apparent that the aggressive feel probably is what you’re going for. Hats off to you. (Although the shade of red you’ve chosen for the links do strain my eyes. Perhaps a shade or two darker?)
The plot provides an interesting yet basic set up. It looks like it would be well-liked among those just starting out in the music-themed RP world (which I personally find funny because the Bourbon Room is also a good starting place for musicians. I’ll stay quite now.)
I like how your character bios give goals, history, and personality all while “showing” and not “telling.” The last line of Ruby Lynn’s bio is quite possibly my favorite and I shouldn’t even have to tell you why.
For a first look, this is a pretty good roleplay. Nice work.
Set in the beautiful town of Montreux, Switzerland, the Montfort Dance Company is one of the most prestigious dance companies in the world. But weird things have been happening around the Montfort Palace, lately. Whenever the director decides who’s going to have the main role; something happens to them.
What’s happening? As you know, artists are very superstitious. But what about you? Do you want that role? Or are you afraid?
This is a compilation of words/synonyms I like to look back to whenever I'm writing smut.
I figured I’d share it with you guys. I sort of found it while digging around on the internet a looooong time ago, but I still use it. It’s from a little smut writing guide I put together for the benefit of myself and a couple of my other friends on livejournal an eternity and a half ago when I still used livejournal.
You’re an up and coming fashion model in the world of high fashion, glitz, glam and money. Walking the run way, doing photo shoots, having the biggest wardrobe you’ve ever dreamed of and being paid to go to parties seem like the high life right? Well it is, until you have to live with your rivals and competition. That’s right. MTV has a whole new reality TV shows called Model Behavior.
Living and working in New York City is fast paced and exciting. But what’s even more exciting is the lies that will unravel, the friendships that will be destroyed by betrayal, and of course the adventure of love. So are you ready to move in with all the other models, strike a pose and make a name for yourself? With all the stress both on and off camera; how will you behave?
[ Open Characters ] [ Apply ] [ FC List ] [ Companies to Choose ]
Nobody’s perfect, same thing with characters. Every single character needs flaws. Flawed characters are way more interesting than emotionally well-balanced ones.
Here are several lists of flaws:
Character Flaw Index - Television Tropes & Idioms
Dark World RPG - Character Flaws List
Good Flaws, Bad Flaws - Television Tropes & Idioms
Let me just start by saying that I love GIFs because they’re fun. They’re amusing. Honestly, I find them to be a nice touch to responses, whether they be one-liners, paragraphs or rapidfires. They’re nice. They’re lovely.
They aren’t what roleplaying is about.
When I first started roleplaying, the notion of a play-by was fucking weird. I started out roleplaying with a bunch of friends privately and then branched into forum territory. There were no play-bys when I started. You made up their face and what they looked like. You created their ethnicity and distinguishing features, their hair color and eye color. You essentially created everything.
When play-bys and face claims popped up, I was all for it. I mean, let’s be realistic here: having an actual visual aid to know what a character looks like is a lot easier than explaining what the character looks like to every new person you roleplay with. I hopped on the bandwagon and jumped at the chance to not have to repeat myself seven hundred times. It was great.
When I was introduced to Tumblr roleplaying, I realized things were a little…well, different. While most of the forums I’d been using at the time had GIFs, they weren’t the main focus of the replies and posts. They were just there. When I started Tumblr roleplaying, I realized that people seemed to put a lot of emphasize on GIFs.
I didn’t get it. I really didn’t. But I went along with it, because different platforms have different norms for roleplaying.
The roleplay I was in had lots of people with lots of faces and GIFs littering the dashboard. Then someone comes into the roleplay and — gasp! Their character has no GIFs at all.
And people more or less ignored that character and that roleplayer because, well, there were no GIFs being used on their posts or replies. That was the actual problem with people. When I was in that group, I did my best to talk to everyone — and I do mean everyone. My character knew everyone’s name and a bit of their history, she had an opinion of who everyone was and who she did and did not like. I always thought it wasn’t fair when people were left out, as I know what that feels like. I did my best to shove myself at them whenever they were online to make them feel welcomed. They were honestly one of the best roleplayers I’ve ever had the pleasure to write with.
But people in that group still didn’t want to roleplay with them.
Because they didn’t have GIFs.
I didn’t understand. I still don’t understand.
Some people don’t use GIFs for their characters. That’s fine. That’s dandy.
Don’t isolate them and shove them from roleplaying because you don’t know how to respond without a freaking moving image.
There really isn’t much for me to say in terms of your theme. It’s simple, but in a good way, I suppose; it’s an elegant kind of simple where the white background isn’t too overpowering but instead works as a nice compliment to the sidebar image and each individual post. However, I noticed that if you were to cover up the posts and sidebar text, it’d be easy to mistake this page for any other tumblr blog because the page is lacking a banner, logo, or even a simple title that gives any sort of clue as to what kind of RPG this is or even indicates that it is an RPG. Also, while the sidebar is a nice image, it’s not telling me much about the roleplay itself—perhaps the setting, but beyond that, nothing else. I suggest using a theme that includes a title or gives you the option of having two images. If you’re adamant on using this particular theme, I think it’d be best if you created some sort of graphic that fits in well with the plot of the RP—one like the one you’re using on your “Full Plot” page would work well, in my opinion.
Speaking of your “Full Plot” page, I quite like it. Again, the white works as a compliment and the greens go well with the overall page and additional graphic. Well done.
GRAPHICS:
The sidebar graphics you’ve made for each character are not only creative, but also provide a little more detail about the character; wonderfully creative. Slight nitpick: the character graphics consist of very bold colors and while that’s not necessarily a bad thing, they create a clash between the graphics and the overall theme of softer, dull colors. As for your promo graphic, the first thing I noticed was the word “Heist” being a bit harder to read than the other words. Since the white word is set directly against her white shirt, it blends in with the background. Easily fixable though; just reposition the text and I think it’ll be fine. However, I do like the remainder of the graphic; it fits in with the mood of the RP and looks nice alongside the theme.
plot;
EXTENDED PLOT:
A couple typos I would like to point out before I get into it: I think you meant for “Bobby Bishop is stuck is Paris” to be “Bobby Bishop is stuck in Paris” and “Everyone is just try to do their job” in the last paragraph to be “Everyone is just trying to do their job”
In the first paragraph, you’ve used the whole “there’s just one problem” type of phrase twice, which creates a predictable sort of repetition. If you want to use the same mood and tone set by the “there’s just one problem” phrase, I suggest cutting one out and replacing it with something just as short and blunt such as changing “There’s just one problem. Bobby Bishop is stuck in Paris being tailed by Interpol.” to “Except Bobby Bishop is stuck in Paris being tailed by Interpol.” Has the same sudden effect, right?
At this point, I would like to make it clear that I have not read nor heard about Heist Society before reading your plot. That being said, I think that your extended plot provides a nice set up for those who have not read the book, like myself.
However, the biggest problem I have with it is that there is simply too much information at once that makes it hard to follow at times. The abrupt transition from the set up to Taccone to the Heist Society to the police left me lost and a bit confused. I’m not going to say you should cut out unnecessary details because to be honest, all of this detail is necessary, especially to those not familiar with the novel. But I did notice that most of these plot points are heavily character driven, so what I would suggest is for you to move (notice I said “move” not “delete” the three middle paragraphs to their own separate and respective pages and then provide links to said pages at the bottom of your main plot or possible somewhere on your “characters” page (for example, something at that says “Read more about the POLICE here [insert link]”). This would break it up nicely instead of having one long plot that appears as if it were all over the place.
CHARACTERS:
I adore the amount of detailed information you’ve put into each and every bio. The usage of third-person omniscient POV gives me solid background info and a good feel for the characters while still leaving room for me to make my own interpretations about the character. Your relationships are open ended and serve as a good basic starting point for the player to work with.
You haven’t opened yet, so it’s understandable that you don’t have many bios up. When you do post more, I would like to see more diversity. For example, I would love to know more about Marcus Spector and learn about his past and how he felt about taking care of Hale. Non-thieves, such as members of the mob or police, would also be incredibly interesting characters to play and observe; I am to understand that the novel is mainly told from the point of view of the thief? If so, then I’m sure people would love to see the point of view of a mobster or policeman during all this.
miscellaneous;
NAVIGATION:
Very thorough and extensive; I actually didn’t know RPs did playlists until today. Your basics are properly done in order of importance, the links are all working fine, and the only real problem is that not all of your pages are up but again, understandable since you have yet to open.
There’s actually not much for me to say here since it’s so well done. Kudos.
RULES & APPLICATION:
In the fourth rule of your “applying” section, I think it would benefit new roleplayers if you provided helpful links on how to cut posts, reblog as text, and whatever else is necessary. You don’t have to, but it would be a nice little added tip for those not familiar with tumblr RP. I do like how you’ve mentioned that players must be knowledgeable of character connections; I can’t tell you how many times I’ve encountered people in RPGs who had no idea who my character was, despite the bios clearly stating that they were related/roommates/former lovers/etc., but I digress.
At first glance, I thought the application would be easy to fill out but then I saw the “How do you see your character developing?” part of the application; it’s a very nice touch. It really forces the player to carefully think about their character and their personality and how they would grow as a person over time. However, I still think the application is a bit too simple. Perhaps you could add in a couple questions that the player would have to answer IC, such as “What do you think of your childhood?” or “Opinion on being a thief/mobster/policeman/etc.” or something along those lines. Or you could even add in a “Describe your character in 3-4 sentences” to give the player an even better feel for the character they’re auditioning for.
Also, this is just a personal preference, but you could add in a submit box to both application pages for ease of access. If you don’t know how, ask any RPCHA (myself included) and I’m sure they’ll be glad to help.
ADMIN CONDUCT:
Very professional. You give precise answers to questions and don’t clutter the blog with promotions every ten minutes. Bravo.
overall;
I didn’t have much to comment on, considering how early in development this RP seems to be, but I did like what I saw. Plot could use a bit of cleaning up, but other than that, it’s golden.
Good luck to you and your RP and again, apologies for the wait.
I don't understand why some indie RPer's even bother putting a weight section on their bios only to just put some vague answer like "average" or "never ask a lady her weight"; I mean, if you're gonna put in a specific height but then give me bullshit for the weight then why even put in a weight section at all if you're not giving me a specific number. You're not being cute, you're not being clever, you're just annoying me.
The trouble with making a guide to 1x1 is that there is no “right” way to do it. Everyone does it their own way. But I hope I can help ever so slightly. 1x1 is not as hard at all (in fact it’s fairly simplistic) but I heard people having trouble so I thought I might share what I’ve learned from the few months I’ve been doing this. I’ll cover as much as I can, as extensively as I can. Questions? Let me know!
I see many people limiting themselves to things like blockquote, listing and bold when they’re doing something in a post, be it writing bios, doing their character posts, all that stuff. What if I told you you could create your own post layout, by using the span tag and CSS?
