Finn: New phone... who is this?
Bas: You know who this is bitch.
Finn: I see your humor has not grown in these past months...
Finn: Long time no speak. How have you been?
Bas: I've been... incognito
Finn: I know. So you contacting me has me both curious and concerned.
Bas: The devil tracked me down and is now trying to drag me to hell.
Finn: WHAT?! What do you mean?
Bas: That old ass fucking queen broke into my god damn home and was trying to play grandpa with Bella. Cedes almost threw a fit. I almost shit myself. Chaos man. Just utter fucking chaos.
Bas: Fam is good. Bella wasn't harmed. Cedes and I were a little shook but we fucked it out the next day.
Finn: Thank you for the explicit details. I missed those.
Bas: I'm back on the grind man! Like I got a fucking kid and he got me out here doing old shit. I just want to play with my daughter and watch Sprout. Why is shit so hard!
Bas: I got a haircut, clean up and shower for the first time in months.
Finn: ...you haven't been showering?
Bas: I have! I just meant like a Disney Prince makeover
Finn: were you not showering B?
Bas: What kind of dirty mother fucker do you think I am?!
Bas: Raising a baby is HARD! Sometimes I fall asleep or forget what day it is. So excuse me if I forget to wash my ass once in awhile.
Bas: I get covered in shit, spit, food and sometimes pee by the cutest thing in the world. It's very difficult and exhausting.
Bas: But i'm trying to be a daddy again so I gotta deal.
Finn: Wait what? First your dad knows about Bella and now you're trying to have a another baby?
Bas: I love my kid. Didn't think i'd like children but I like my own. Plus so much sex. My girl looks really hot pregnant. I don't know man, my dick gets hard for trivial shit. But we're trying to have another baby.
Finn: How are you managing all this?
Bas: I got it under control. I need to get in touch with Rachel so she can organize my shit out. I can't be busting nuts and abandoning my girl's all the damn time. That shit is not cool and not how I want my house run. But I can't take Bella out in public. Shit is rough.
Finn: You didn't hear about Rachel?
Bas: WHAT THE FUCK IS UP!
Finn: She passed away on New Years
Bas: Why did no one fucking tell me?
Finn: We weren't allowed to contact you, remember?
Bas: Shit. What happened?
Finn: She fell at a party according to the news.
Finn: Yeah, from a balcony at a party while drunk. I always told you balconies were unsafe.
Bas: Call me in the morning! We can get breakfast.