Young Flex

25 year old nightmare, end my suffering for $5

[partycactus1]

3cute

[kiiingsnake]

snakes are reversed vampires

they get energy from lying in the sun, they inject shitty blood IN with their fangs, and they have no hands

????? vampires have hands?????????

[cannibalcaprine-deactivated2024]

yeah??

[kiiingsnake]

ayo what the FUCK 

[cannibalcaprine-deactivated2024]

why wouldn't they??

[kiiingsnake]

hey guys you’re allowed to call me the stupidest motherfucker on the earth but i unironcially thought vampire meant the same thing as vespa. i straight up believed that shit for the five seconds i took to comprehend this ask. what the fuck

[cannibalcaprine-deactivated2024]

THE FUCKING MOPED???

[kiiingsnake]

THE FUCKING MOPED

[that-house]

I’M SORRY YOU WHAT

[camellianswer]

vampires: exist

op:

[that-house]

VAMPIRES EXIST?!?!?!?!?!?

[kiiingsnake]

great job with my post guys. hit the showers

[thequeervampiric]

isn’t a vespa a kind of snake

[quicksilverdaisyday]

A VIPER?????

[ampervadasz]

[thickness-protection-program]

Edward Cullen energy

[jultheevirgo]

what does that mean?

[thickness-protection-program]

[nemesismess]

[tinychubbybarista]

[princesstigerbelle]

BOX FOR PLAY

[tangerinebonfire]

Look at this beautiful angel

[princesstigerbelle]

[nostalgia1992]

[toney-starks]

[sandersstudies]

My husband’s job primarily employs adult men but there is one (1) teenage girl and my husband said originally he worried she might be a bit of an outcast but instead every man on the crew was like “huh guess I am a dad/older brother now.”

[sandersstudies]

She was in a car crash on the way to work one morning and called my husband to let him know she’d be late and he was like wtf guess I’m gonna be late too because I’m coming to pick you up and then he told his team and they were like I think you mean WE are coming.

[hoonkus-deactivated20230701]

Imagine you are a teenage girl probably rushing to get to work and you crash your probably new car and feel absolutely miserable and now you’ll be late to work but then suddenly in the distance a car full of all the adult men you work with just pulls up and is like “we came all the way here to pick you up” the mental image right now is fr.

[sandersstudies]

Apparently she tried to call her dad but it was 3am and he was obviously sleeping so she called my husband and he not only came to find her but fished her glasses out of the hood of the car (she’d dropped them while looking inside), drove her to the hospital, and told her to take the day off. She insisted on coming back to work so he used his lunch break to watch TV with her to make sure she didn’t doze off (concussion risk).

You’ve heard of the Mom friend but my husband is very much the Dad friend. He said when he answered the phone she said “hey please don’t be mad” and he’s never felt such powerful Fatherhood energy in his life.

[deliciouspaintthinner]

Girl: *calls for aid*

Every single dad packed into the car:

[sandersstudies]

This is possibly my favorite response to this post

[i-like-to-think-that-im-cool]

This girls father: Thanks for helping my daughter out guys

Your husband and all his coworkers:

[thenatsdorf]

2019 Fashion year in review. (via @rover_thecat)

[pricklylegs-deactivated20250727]

That mouse necklace! 

[ottermatopoeia]

[ayamccabre]

That music choice tho. Kitty keeps time well.

[i-hate-chick-fil-a]

We stan!!!!

chaotic good

[exploding-plastic-inevitable]

There’s a happy ending to, because the robbery was unsuccessful, the couple ended up getting the money Eden needed from a movie inspired by em! Also John only had to serve part of his sentence. Check out their wedding photos btw they’re beautiful.

[itsanidiom]

reblogging because I’ve seen this post a thousand times and I’ve never seen the happy ending!! 

[tropiyas]

[robustmyaft]

WHY DOES THIS FIT SO WELL LIKE THEIR MOUTHS ARE SYNCING WITH THE SONG PERFECTLY AND THIS HASN’T EVEN BEEN EDITED THE FUCK

[weredice]

[girlboy2000]

ALL LGBTQ+ PEOPLE ARE VALID! 

I want to make more of these because there are so many different identities that I obviously didn’t include on this one, so send me a message or an ask with ones I should include on the next one! 

(pt. 2  pt. 3  pt. 4)

[timedeo-moved-deactivated202105]

gotta learn how to draw furries those mfs are suspiciously rich

[timedeo-moved-deactivated202105]

[rocky-rabble]

Yeah most furries work in the tech industry. Fun fact, if 50 specific furries all decided to take a day off at the same time, internet Services would probably collapse

[rocky-rabble]

There’s also this guy apparently. Furries are loaded

[eternal-fractal]

considering becoming a furry for financial stability.

[surprisebitch]

#this hit me like a truck

[setforstars]

[dare-i-say-asexual]

False

[sevenspires]

funniest part about this is i dont know which category youre trying to add him to

[y6le]

[sillystarflakes]

why do i feel this represents my digestive system cells at 4 am

[kaelio]

[dollfat]

[piesa2]