hey.

24

[andreablog2]

J Lo and I have actually been enemies in every life cycle for thousands of years. Every time I see her I get flashbacks to when I was a horseshoe crab and she was a scientist.

[yugiohz]

[rainbow-gend3r-deactivated20250]

Sputnik 2, launched on November 3, 1957, carried the dog Laika, the first living creature to be shot into space and orbit Earth. Laika was a stray dog found on the streets of Moscow. There were no plans to return her to Earth, and she lived only a few hours in orbit. …

taken from @gallivantsofgillis on tiktok

[alphaincar]

[d3l3t3d-b10g]

Technically this passes the bechdel test

[rain-droplet]

bechdel test but the himbos are trying to get in

[swaggie2dope]

went to trader joe’s today and my cashier handed me my 2.55 in change and pointed at the clock which read 2:55 and said “look at that. that’s liquid time… serendipity… have a nice ride”

[doctorbluesmanreturns]

[hauntanelle]

one time my friend and i came up with a basic “language” called wheat vegetable root. wheat represented every noun. vegetable represented every verb. root represented every adjective. it was very body language based. if my friend beckoned and said “vegetable”, i understood that my friend was telling me to walk with them. if my friend pointed to something and said “wheat”, i understood that they were showing me something. if they said “root wheat” and smiled, they’re saying this thing is good. if they say “root wheat” and frown, they’re saying this thing is bad. we spent a whole day talking like this and drove the rest of our friends insane.

[vortigone]

angel in space who falls in love with an astronaut floating out in the void, not realizing they've been dead for years out there nor comprehending what death even is. is that anything

[vortigone]

the angel starts leading them back to earth cuz they think that's what'll make them feel better, finally talk back to them, open up. it takes lightyears to get back to earth's atmosphere and when they do, the angel embraces them as gravity takes hold and pulls them crashing down. they both incinerate into ash and disappear. is that anything

[cherryysocks]

idk is this anything

[medievaljournalist]

tragedy strikes as an amateur boomhauer impression coincidentally matches up with the incantation for a fireball spell

[cryptotheism]

"schitzoposting" is just "derp holds up spork XD" for people who fumble harsh noise trannies

[cryptotheism]

Blessed are those who must ask "what is a sword?"

If this post be nonsense to thine ears, rejoice, for it was peested not for thee.

[noelle-ism]

peested lol

[cryptotheism]

Works Cited:

[1] Jame7t, "rename posts to peests or we stop using the site"

[sambuchito]

every time I fumble w my phone’s charger cable I think about emailing steven moffat a pipe bomb

[omagpies]

[ you meet god and she is mostly dead fish. ]

a comic based on this post:

You meet god and she's mostly dead fish. You ask her why and she says most of the world is dead fish, and she's made herself to appeal to th

[shoebillstork]

This is genuinely my favorite tweet ever btw

[serglesinner]

THIS COMMENT ALSO... HELPP

[inkskinned]

she asked me if i believed in god and i told her that when i was four i almost drowned in a public pool and in my panic mistook a stranger for my father. i clawed my way up his leg. four years later he’d send my parents a picture of the scars alongside a tin of cookies. he said, “i hope she’s still okay. i carry her with me. it isn’t every day you save a life. it isn’t every day you feel like you were here for a reason. when it does happen, you have to cherish that memory. for once, i had a purpose. just being there was enough. she tore me open but she taught me a lot about love.”

[tyltos]

[cannibalchicken]

[doradotcom]

you cant employ me in a way that matters

[h0nex]

call my pussy a truffle the way your hog is hunting it down through the bush

[mexicain-sans-frontiers-v2]