Salutations

THESE MEN ARE LEADING YOU ASTRAY. SITTING ON THE HAT AGAIN WILL ONLY CAUSE IT FURTHER DAMAGE.

[what-do-i-like-deactivated20180]

[glamprincess-blog]

1780 by Carrie WishWishWish on Flickr.

[claar-bookdragonwitch]

i want one

[dahliaxdelilah]

[asfwawdsf-deactivated20140401]

  bros bandaged up the worst ones and im typing with my good hand though i think i it up a little when i was holding the razorblade

ive got half a mind to pull some sort of sick prank

and yes sir on the outside please

had it once on the inside and it nearly ruined the experience

[pastrykind-blog]

Okay. You focus on healing up. I'll get you your cake. I'll be logging off for the night. I expect to hear from you tomorrow. Good night, Daisy. Don't do anything stupid.

[mcegberts-archive]

in any case, be careful! you’re bound to meet a lot of people on here, even alternates of myself that might not be quite what you expect.  it was a lot of work and it was really hard, but we managed to pull through in the end. and i get to live a better life now! thanks.  so then you’ve found your john and he’s having a successful life? i’m happy for you both. ugh, college life is so stressful though. well why don’t you try and find new hobbies? or maybe even travel the world? i’m sure it must be lonely and boring in that house of ours, assuming you still live there.  i’ll make sure to remember that, dad. promise! if i ever get that point, anyways. 

[pastrykind-blog]

Well I'll definitely take your warning to heart. Now I'd hate to cut this conversation short, but I do need to get to bed. Beauty sleep and all that. Early to bed, early to rise. More parental sayings. I'm sure you get the drift. It was a pleasure, John. We should definitely chat more when we get the opportunity. Good night, son.

[pastrykind-blog]

goodgirlgonestrider, karkatze, brotocols, tavslut, and djshota started following you.

It looks like quite the interesting crew here! With some rather colorful screen names. It's unfortunate, but time is of the essence and it's much past my bed time. Do feel free to respond! I'll make sure to get back to it in the morning. Thank you all for the follows.

[asfwawdsf-deactivated20140401]

  no im okay well not really theres

someones helping me out and i think ill be okay soon

and ill look forward to the scolding

and the cake

can i request toasted raisins in it with toasted coconut on the outside

i was spoiled when it came to cake

[pastrykind-blog]

Stop typing for God's sake! That will hardly do your bleeding wrists any good! You darned fool. Do you have any clue the grief you'd bring if you had ended your life just now? I have half a mind not to give you this cake as punishment! Coconut on the outside, right?

[cantankerousgenocide-blog]

  SOME WELCOME POST IT WAS. IT BROKE MY TAG AND I DIDN’T EVEN SEE IT, SO YOU CAN PROBABLY GROUND IT AND TELL IT TO STEP UP IT’S GAME NEXT TIME. YOU DON’T NEED TO MAKE MORE PEOPLE SUFFER THAN THEY ALREADY HAVE, IT’S STUPID AND UNNECESSARY.

MY JOHN, YES. I DON’T KNOW ABOUT *YOUR* JOHN, BUT YOU COULD CALL US FRIENDS TO A CERTAIN EXTENT.

[pastrykind-blog]

Looks like you've got a mouth on you! Fingers. You understand. I'll make sure to give the tag a stern telling off the next time I see it. I can't have it going off breaking blogs and the likes! Oh where did I go wrong as a parent? Ah, yes. The alternates. I imagined as much. Well a friend of any John is a friend of mine!

[gorgeousgardens]

  hi johns dad! :D sorry if i qualify it with 'johns' but itd be a little weird just calling you dad, if you know what i mean. :x how are you? <3 :D

[pastrykind-blog]

It's not a problem, Jade! Completely understandable. After all I don't need all of tumblr thinking I'm some creepy old man after all. What a first impression that would be. I'm doing rather well! Chatting with all sorts of people and "alternates." It's fascinating! How are you, dear?

[mcegberts-archive]

yeah but this site is… different. trust me when i say this.  do people still use livejournal? well, i like to think of the positives of it all rather than the negatives.  for example, i met a lot of good people because of it and i became strong! and i even got to help save existence with all of my friends! i’ve grown up a bit, i guess.  you were always a bachelor though, at least as far as i could recall. unless… there was someone i didn’t know about it or it was more recent? well every now and then! i still think i’m a master prankster and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise! oh no way. i was never into them! they’re so creepy!!!

[pastrykind-blog]

I'm sure it's nothing your old man can't handle. Alternate or not. This certainly isn't any LJ as far as I can remember, but it has its charm. It also has it's spectacular range of colorful characters. I'm glad to hear you did so well in the end. I'd say I'm proud of you, but I bet that's getting rather tired isn't it? Good job. You sound like you performed just as well as I imagined. I knew you'd do it. I was always a father first. Anything else came second.  With my John off in college I finally have time for myself and I haven't a clue what to do. When you have kids don't let them grow up too fast, John. Oh and don't get sucked into a video game and die. Parenting 101.

[asfwawdsf-deactivated20140401]

  hint what if it wasnt sass

because what if right now i cut open my wrist because i wanted to play god and remove this strider from the plane of existence earlier than she was meant to

because for the last sixteen years or so shes never felt the way she was supposed to

because society says i was born a boy and i dont want that i want to be who i want to be

and not even the one you grew up with can accept you

cake sounds delightful can you make carrot cake

[pastrykind-blog]

Oh. Are you okay? Of course you're not okay. You're wrists are slit for goodness sake. Do you need a hospital? I don't know how this alternate universe stuff works, but this is by no means acceptable! Regardless of your circumstances, you're still a person with feelings, rights, and needs. Others be damned. I pray that you live through this if only so I can scold you so very harshly afterwards! Then give you a cake. It will have more carrots than any bunny could handle.

[pastrykind-blog]

affranchi, puhaltaa, gorgeousgardens, and jakedingalinglish started following you.

A couple more familiar faces I see! With that it should complete the gang of munchkins! Good to hear from you Jade, Rose.  And a stranger! All are welcome here. It's a pleasure. Please, call me Dad. Old man will also work.

[pastrykind-blog]

liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiar.

//Shhh. Nonsense.

[cantankerousgenocide-blog]

MORE THAN LIKELY.

EXPLAIN YOURSELF, SINCE I CLEARLY DIDN’T SEE YOUR ORIGINAL POST THAT DID MY TAG IN IN THE FIRST PLACE.

[pastrykind-blog]

I suppose it would be a welcome post more than anything else! You did follow me after all. Thank you for that. You're an unfamiliar face though. I don't suppose you're one of John's friends?

[asfwawdsf-deactivated20140401]

  nothin like someone telling you to chin up when youre half way between dead and alive and all you want is to fucking die

but you cant

alright then dad

hows it hangin in the house of egbert

[pastrykind-blog]

If you can learn to channel some of that sass into some positive thinking you'll probably make it out more alive than ever before! Don't give up, kid. You're a Strider. From what I remember, you're a strong bunch. Reliable too. How about this. Make it out of your predicament and I'll bake you a cake. I promise it will be as sweet as life.

[mcegberts-archive]

this site is strange so be careful.  you never know what you’ll find here.  it’s not unwelcome, it’s just… odd.  after seeing you die and killing your murderer, i thought i put that all behind me, but i guess not huh? i’m doing well actually! a little sore, but i’ll manage.  i’m proud to say that the world ending game part of my life is over and done with. of course there was no doubt that i’d win! hmm… you don’t have to worry about that either! trust me. what about you… uh… dad? if that’s fine to call you that anyways. how are you?

[pastrykind-blog]

It's not my first time on the internet, John. I'm well aware of the dangers of different blogging websites. Do you remember livejournal? Those were the days. That was before everyone was killing everybody and double dead was a thing. Thank goodness the experience doesn't seem to have had too negative of an impact on you. It puts an old man's worries at ease. I'm not doing too badly myself. Still getting used to the bachelor lifestyle. I guess that's what I am now. A bachelor. Never thought that would happen. How about you, boy? Still pulling some pranks? How about that silly obsession with harlequins? Are you still into that?