hot mess

jess // aries // 18 // tbh just back on this acc bc i was trying to find the profile of a cute boy in my communication class LOL but hi

[valtsv]

*banging fists on the table* orc/elf gfs orc/elf gfs ORC/ELF GFS

[valtsv]

bonus points if the orc is clean and sensible and obsessed with poetry and fine art while the elf is a feral nightmare berserker who more often than not returns home looking like she’s just been dragged backwards through a hedge full of thorns after bathing in a swamp

[valtsv]

orc lady: this is my tiny wife

her elf wife: babe, i’m 7 feet tall

orc lady, straightening her back and shoulders slightly to better show off her full 9′4″ of height: i love my tiny wife

[mellebellemethod]

It happens this year folks…

[gattomeows]

[super-metroid]

[mephystophyles]

sure, when my grandfather fought nazis and fascism he was “a hero” and “on the right side of history” but when i do it im “way too sensitive” and “no better than they are”

[mephystophyles]

Happy one year anniversary of this post also fuck nazis and fuck Donald Trump

[itsfuckingminecraft]

[sealedbeastnue]

hnnggggg ghghbbuububububububububu hhhgh hh

[bisexuanal]

Why is this so funny skdkska

[gahdamnpunk]

This needs to be a nationwide initiative!

[sonneillonv-deactivated20220218]

I’m glad to see that they’re being fairly paid for the work.

[renee-niles]

I honestly sighed in relief when I saw it was $15 an hour. Good on San Jose.

[thursday]

*gracefully flips over a quesadilla* anyone would be lucky to have me

[shibbpost]

What the fuck is a gender

[streetkit]

It’s a purple ghost pokemon that evolves from Haunter

[guooey]

haha look at this little dude

[guooey]

[jp299]

[chronosamurai]

[covid-69]

While I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a clapping, As of ass cheeks gently clapping, clapping at my chamber door.

[buffafro]

“tis a visitor,” i muttered, “dummy thicc, and nothing more”

[guy]

if we’re in a mutual follow feel free to give me your credit card number ! :)

[dankmemeuniversity]

[patheticbird-blog]

hello david poach, if ur out there

ur super cute and so funny and i hope i can kiss u next week and all the time someday

[its365dayschallenge]

[slimetony]

I really hope I don’t have an epic fail today

[doomy]

me as a brain surgeon

[roy-kent]

me, handing in my essays:

[turnipot]