Why is this year just so shitty?
Year starts with the nerve pain issues. Can't figure it out, nothing helping.
Can't work. Might never be able to work in what I was hoping would become my career again. I thought I'd finally found something I was good at that I could do with my life, but it's unlikely that my body can handle it.
ER visit #1 + Tom gets in a car accident and totals his car + Tom's mom's incurable cancer diagnosis + Bree dying all in the same week
I spend what should have been my last full day with Bree in the ER waiting 20 hours to see a doctor
ER visit #2 turns into week long stay in the hospital. Get injection into the nerve. Injection does nothing.
Struggle to get a response from my surgeon's office. Have to fight them to get an appointment. Have to wait a long time for the appointment. Meanwhile there's no relief from the pain and I can't walk or sit up.
Referred for a nerve conduction study. It takes months to get an appointment.
ER visit #3 because the pain is so unmanageable. They can't do anything for me. Waste of many hours of agony in the waiting room.
Nerve study shows active nerve damage. Duh. Now it's another fight to get a follow up appointment with the surgeon. It takes weeks.
Finally approved for surgery. Time estimate is 6-8 months.
Nerve pain medication suddenly starts working. I can walk again. I can go back to physio. I start doing more and more stuff I enjoy again. I'm told I'll probably be okay on the medication longterm. Maybe I won't even need surgery?
Lol just kidding the medication stops working.
But wait! The hospital calls with a surgery date much earlier than expected. Yayyy!!!
Lol just kidding they cancel the surgery an hour before I'm due to arrive. They say there's no other openings for me, they'll have to get back to me in a week with an update but the update might be that they have nothing.
I have missed so many dog events I was excited for, delayed my dog's agility career another year, I'm missing a trip to Mastergroom Canada with my coworkers, I can't really do any of the activities I enjoy, I can't see my friends or family very much, I'm not progressing with getting fit, having a baby is being pushed back another year at least, I can't jump on my opportunity to get an Arthur puppy, I can't teach my agility and hoopers students, I'm only a burden on my husband who has to care for me ....
Oh and of course my mom probably needs surgery, my sister needs 2 surgeries, Haley needs surgery, my amazing MIL has aggressive blood cancer, and I also have to get my very impacted wisdom teeth removed. It is the year of surgeries.
Can I just have a win please?
The only good thing this year is Arthur's puppies. The saving grace of the last few months. At least one good thing happened. They are precious and perfect and healthy and beautiful. We are going to see them in early August whether I've had surgery or not.
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