[wifehaver103947]

the new york times is now charging money for my favorite chocolate cake recipe so i bought a subscription and screenshotted it and canceled my subscription and now it's here for you for free

i do a mixture of red wine and fresh squeezed navel orange juice for the liquid, plus the zest of one large orange. now you make the cake

[mintmatcha]

"i use chatgpt to meal prep I use chatgpt to do blah blah blah" you're a fucking idiot incapable of using your own brain

[sandmandaddy69]

[dcmonblood]

Rest in Peace, Liam Payne (1993-2024)

[henstomper]

hard cider was invented when someone decided to make beer that tastes good instead of bad

[penis-ylvania]

I haven’t used this account in years. I’ve forgotten how to tumblr

[traptacular-deactivated20180125]

[localstarboy]

yooo this kid is coming for throats 😂😂😭

[broadwaybuttz-deactivated202306]

Yo why does this kid hate him so much?! 😂

[mosertone]

[mudwerks]

jesus fucking christ

dude

[regularlesbian]

dont you hate it when you’re with the boys and carl screeches fluid of primal hatred onto your food and drink

[fuckstev-deactivated20240104]

breaking news: my girlfriend just murdered me

[fuckstev-deactivated20240104]

[pedahls]

the older i get the more i realize how unimportant it is to tell people my business

[themoonweepstonight]

domestic sweetness!!!! getting groceries together, buying home decor together??? making traditions??? cooking dinner while badly singing along to the radio??? making each other breakfast in bed??? leaving notes around the house for each other??? i’m so soft,,,,

[starwaurs]

copyright 2001, american girl library empowering girls by teaching them what consent is and how manipulation is never ok

[emlestrange]

American Girl was the best shit. I’ve seen people get grossed out by the illustrations in their puberty books, but lord, how else was I supposed to properly learn? American Girl gave zero fucks about conservative family feelings. They were like “girls need to know this shit and we’re going to market it in such a way that you buy it”

[weirdmageddon]

girls night girls night girls night

[reallyreallyreallytrying]

medusa, trying to turn you to stone, but you accidentally called her “melissa” when you first walked in and now you’re too embarrassed to look at her. “it’s alright” she keeps saying “i get it all the time” but you still won’t look. u don’t even remember the stone thing until later

[30-minute-memes]

[thestateonmtv]

living in the suburbs is like mall. Movies. Mall again. Go to target. Go to gamestop. Back to the mall. Barnes and noble. Back to the mall. Chili’s. Back to the mall. Eat hot chip. Lie. And I’m SICK of it!!!!!

[thestateonmtv]

I’m sorry god please forgive me I would give anything to go to Barnes and noble and then dinner at Chili’s with a lava mountain cake please lord take me back I’ll never complain again