if not at home, she’s at peace here, amid the dankly echoing ceiling of the auditorium with her VOICE. her concentration doesn’t drift to his footfalls padding across the stage, she commands the individual notes to her whole BEING, like existing inside them, or like she’s made FOR THEM or out of them. it’s melancholy, and it pierces him with musing to whether she grieves for finn more or less today, or if this was her method to sorting out their bustle around one another in the hall the other day with an exchange that had him worried they might kiss or confront what they had recently been avoiding like the plague. since then, he hasn’t properly closed his eyes without a flash of her expression in that moment –––– expectant, fearful ? and he hasn’t efficiently co - lead a practice without fumbling a football if she skipped past, or there was a whiff of her conditioner –––– peppermint, melon ? it’s dark, but she creates her own spotlight, humming from within her, and it awes him that she sings both for herself and the entire universe; both like there isn’t another soul aside from her’s listening and the collective souls of an audience are gathered to weep for her as she weeps for finn, or her capability to CEASE weeping for finn, that there would be a day he would be a box of photographs and memories and an ache as an aftershock. it moves sam as he hasn’t been moved before; does she FEEL finn here on this stage ? after, sam veered to this place, where they lost afternoons, but they have more GAIN than LOSS between them and these walls, even if their most prominent loss was in every corner and outline within the heart of their treasured YOUTH. when she’s done, she cradles her porcelain chin into the fleece sweater of her shoulder, though he rather it be his hand, but the gym bag strapped between his fingers limits him from clearing the glitter of her tears. without a word, the DEPTH of their gazes are enough, they gravitate, and his nose lunges across hers to snip at the cotton web of her lips, and they have their kiss from two days ago. ❜ i knew i’d feel this way one day again ––– after mercedes. i didn’t think it’d be YOU. ❜ // @deathsomens
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