“I know,” Leo groaned, lifting his head to look at her as she stood in the middle of her bedroom. “I know me saying all this doesn’t make anything right and I know I can’t expect you to forgive me for the things that I said, or expect us to kiss and make up. But you wanted me to tell the truth, Peyton. And I did. And I’m sorry that me talking about Alessandra and my feelings for you bothers you, but it’s the truth.” His words were harsh and bitter, and almost unnecessary. But with Peyton picking apart every little thing he said, he couldn’t hold his tongue any longer.
Leo was many things. He was scared of drowning, an excellent home cook, amateur foot massage but most of all, he was good. Sure, some of the things he did were questionable and should’ve been thought out more, but he didn’t do anything out of spite, or to purposefully hurt anyone. Had it been up to him, his secret would have been nothing more than a lingering thought in the back of his head until it vanished altogether. But now, Leo felt defeated. He was afraid to speak simply because he didn’t want to hurt her again. No matter how much truth backed the words coming from his lips, they weren’t what she wanted to hear. So, rather than continue trying to explain his deepest and darkest secrets, Leo pressed his lips together and waited for the onslaught that was surely on its way.
Lifting his head, Leo looked back up to Peyton with her big brown eyes. They sparkled even in the dimly lit room, and he watched as a tear steamed down her cheek. His stomach turned knowing it was because of him, and he fought the urge to get up and comfort her. Surely the last thing she wanted was him to get any closer than he was. “Fuck! Peyton! Yes, we kissed. Alessandra and I kissed. Are you happy now?!” He asked, his voice raising as he grew increasingly frustrated. “I never denied that we kissed. I know you saw it. I know it happened, and I’m sorry that it did. But what do you me to say? What do you want me to do? Just fucking tell me Peyton because apparently nothing I’m saying is right.” Leo ran both his hands through his hair, needing something to channel his anger. He tugged at the dark locks at the back of his head and took in a couple deep breaths. He felt Peyton settle down on the bed next to him, close enough that he could smell her perfume but far enough that he couldn’t touch her. All he wanted to do in that moment was hold her and tell her that everything he said was never meant to hurt her, that putting her through this kind of pain was something he never wanted to do. He’d been going through a lot with the breakup, settling into single-life, and the shop. But she was never a distraction, a play-thing to get his mind off of Alessandra. Everything between them was real. All the dates, all the flirting, all the compliments and late night conversations about real-life issues were real. Yes, Alessandra was a big part of his past, but Peyton was quickly becoming his future. And again, that was the truth.
When Peyton spoke again, he heard the crack in her voice. He’d dug himself into another hole while sharing his truth. “I never slept with Angel,” he said quietly, as if that were any consolation for the fact that he had been simultaneously seeing Peyton and Angel at the same time. It was a remarkable feat actually, to be dating two of Rosefields most powerful and confident women, and best friends at the same time. He had no excuse. It was true. “We went out for lunch and dinner a couple of times, and I saw her the morning of the fair for a little bit. But I never slept with her,” he continued, keeping the details of his relationship with Angel as vague as humanly possible. She didn’t need to know everything that he and her best friend did. It would crush her, even more than the news of Alessandra would. Leo’s feelings for Peyton were far greater than those for her friend. But again, he was sure that Peyton didn’t care. The only thing that mattered was the Angel was also in the picture.
“Peyton please, just listen to me for a second,” Leo all but begged, turning in his seat to look at her. Hesitantly, he lifted a hand and rested it gently on her back, hoping to offer a shred of comfort. He didn’t know what to say to fix the mess he’d made, but he knew where to start. “I’m sorry. For everything,” he said quietly. “You didn’t deserve any of that. I was being selfish and greedy, thinking I could have my cake and eat it too. And while it started off innocently enough with the both of you, I was only thinking of myself and not who I was hurting. I’m sorry.”
Shuffling closer, he wrapped his arm around her, pulling her close so she could rest her head on his chest. If she needed to cry, she could cry. If she needed to yell, she could yell. If she needed use him as a punching bag, to get out all her anger, she could do that. “Pey please. Let’s just talk about it. You can yell at me all you want but I can’t go home knowing I made a mess out of everything and leave you crying in your bed.” His free hand moved to stroke her hair, hoping it would comfort her. “I’m sorry. Okay? I’m sorry.” His words came out more like a whisper and he wasn’t sure he was talking to her anymore.
“No, I’m actually not happy at all.” Peyton spat back at him, shaking her head. On surface level, he was being honest. Leo was laying out all of his dirty laundry. How could you be mad at someone for expressing their truth. But things weren’t always a simple as surface level. Thing were much deeper than simply being honest. In clearing his name, Peyton could feel a lump form in her throat, feel anger form as her fingers curled in a fist. This was difficult for her to hear and even harder to accept. “How would you feel in my position, huh? What if you saw me kissing my ex?” Her voice was no quiet, searching for even the slimmest bit of empathy on his features. “Would you be okay with that? Would you forgive me? Would you want hear me out?” The girl trailed off, running her fingers through her falling curls. She’d wished things were black and white, as simple as him putting himself in her shoes but she knew things in Rosefield were never that simple.
All Peyton could do at his admission was clench at her chest as if she could catch her heart as It dropped to her stomach. Angel didn’t know. How could she have known when the redhead had kept her affair with the mechanic so private? Her ignorance didn’t make it hurt any less. All his words went in one ear and right out the other. They held no weight, had no proof to back them up. Just because he spoke the truth once didn’t mean these words were just that. Feeling his palm hesitantly graze her back, she winced under his grasp. Her reaction was visceral, completely unprompted by her will. But Peyton sunk, letting him touch her for a moment. She didn’t have the energy to fight back as she imagined her raven haired best friend in the arms of the man she was growing to love. Did they plan a road trip back to Seattle? Did they eat at the same restaurants? Did she sleep in his bed on the same side Alessandra had, too?
As he inched closer, wrapping his arm around her, she snapped. All the emotions that rode high, all the tears she’d been holding on, all the anger that bubbled within she. She squirmed in his grip. This was not enough to break his grip. She didn’t have the energy to break away, Peyton was tired. “We talked, Leo! I’ve heard enough.” Her glistening chocolate eyes looked down at the small space between them. How close their chests were yet how the distance felt like miles. They were separated and she wasn’t sure if they’d ever be the same. Her lips drew themselves in a thin line, pursing as she built up the courage to look up at him. His hand was in her hair and her eyes were on him. “God, look at me..” Peyton’s voice broke once more, tears welling her eyes. She couldn’t keep it in anymore as hard as she tried. “Am I still terrifying and outspoken? No. No, I’m not. You broke the girl who doesn’t get hurt.” And maybe that was a good thing. Peyton sat shaking her head in his arms, refusing to blink away the tears that sat in limbo in her eyes.
The birds were beginning to chirp outside her balcony’s window, the sun muttered as it rose. They’d been fighting far too long, what had become hours of frustrated hair pulling and tear filled eyes. Peyton slipped out of his arms and stepped away from him. She sniffled as she quickly got herself together. “You’re staying.” She blurted, pulling down the zipper on the back of her dress. It was almost like she resumed her terrifying queen personality as the sun rose. “I can smell the booze on your breath and the cops in this town surely will too if they pull you over. They may be incompetent but they’re not stupid.” Peyton stepped out of her dress, standing in only a strapless bra and her thong. It probably wasn’t the most appropriate thing to do in the midst of an argument but she was exhausted, physically and emotionally. She quickly threw on a big t-shirt, unintentionally it was Leo’s but she didn’t care enough to look for something else. “But I want you gone before I wake up. You may be winning the academy award for biggest douchebag but I still care about you.” Peyton said monotonously before throwing up her hair. She’d made him promise to wake her up and kiss her every morning before he left for work, it was scary how quickly things changed.
