idek @phanrotic - Tumblr Blog

angelgone224-deactivated2021030

Dads love to talk about roads. Whatd u take to get on the highway. Whatd you take to get off the highway

glittergradient

so when are they gonna publish a book with all their tips on where to get the best festive foods and drinks in london?

moonchair

I’m gonna do hard ‘cause I’m hard. Phil’s a normie confirmed.

moonchair

I don’t think he’s gonna have a singing career.

vaporwavesimulator

nothing like pulling these bad boys out after a long day am i right boys. clack clack motherfucker

adorablehowell

HELLO ME AND JAKE HERE AGAIN FOR ANOTHER FUN NIGHT OF BANTZ AND CARDS AGAINST HUMANITY!!!

here is the link: https://pyx-1.pretendyoure.xyz/zy/game.jsp#game=80

password: clubpenguin

PLEASE COME JOIN FOR FUN!!!!

phanrotic

COME PLAY WITH US WE’RE DESPERATE

justjames

The endless cycle of not wanting to get in the shower and then not wanting to get out of the shower

ruusverd

I’m in my mid-twenties, and honestly get so much hate over being childfree that I’ve started telling people I have an adopted daughter when they ask about my kids. I just conveniently leave out the fact that my adopted daughter is, in fact, a 40-pound sheep, one of roughly two dozen that live in my back yard.

It isn’t even a lie, I raised that lamb on a bottle from the day she was born, as far as she’s concerned I’m her mom. And as long as I’m vague enough, the problems of dealing with sheep sound totally believable as human toddler parenting problems. “Oh yeah, my daughter’s two, she always puts everything in her mouth.” “Ugh, my daughter is always climbing on stuff, I swear she’s part mountain goat!”

I live for seeing how long I can keep it up before someone asks to see a picture of my little darling. “Sure!” I say, “Here she is! Isn’t she adorable?” then relish the horrified confusion when they see this tiny little brown sheep like: