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Cosmic Funnies
Mike Driver
Sweet Seals For You, Always

titsay
Sade Olutola

oozey mess
wallacepolsom
ojovivo
The Bowery Presents
we're not kids anymore.

#extradirty
almost home
Show & Tell
art blog(derogatory)
NASA
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
YOU ARE THE REASON
Fai_Ryy
The Stonewall Inn
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@photographer-riley
Text ⇆ Riarkle
Farkle: I THINK YOU CAN EXCLUDE MOST THINGS INVOLVING LUCAS FROM YOUR GREATNESS ATTEMPTS. REMEMBER THE TIME YOU ACCIDENTALLY REJECTED HIM FOR THE DANCE BY ACCIDENT? Although I guess that one was kind of great for me because I didn't have a date. I think your uncle barely had any credibility in Washington to begin with after he proposed that we let the Avengers take care of that terrorist attack. He was, but yeah, at least he cared about stuff. And some of us learned stuff anyways. :P I know what Belgium 1831 is and I'm actually fluent in Portuguese, although not in Chewbaca. :O You know what, Riles? That is a great idea. Like one of the best I've ever heard. YOU COULD COME SAVE ME FROM MY PAPERWORK ON A DAILY BASIS.
Riley: CHARLIE SNUCK UP ON ME! IT WAS AN HONEST MISTAKE!!! I REALLY THOUGHT THE GUY WHO SNUCK A WHITE HORSE INTO THE GYM WAS CAPABLE OF YOGI ON SKATES! In his defense, if the Avengers were REAL, they would have been the best candidates. I'd let Captain America save me any day 😇 What DID happen in Belgium 1831? I think I was passing notes with Maya that day. Portuguese is maybe more useful, I should have taken you with me to Portugal as my translator! I've got Chewbacca covered for us, though, aren't you proud? REALLY? No one's ever given me a real photography job before, if you could really get me one that would be the best thing ever 😍😍😍
Text ⇆ Riarkle
Farkle: I WAS YOUNG. DO YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT SILLY THINGS WE DID WHEN WE WERE YOUNG PRINCESS DANCING SUNSHINE? I try, but the government has to stop denying global warming first. 🌸🌸🌸 Hey, at least you were only thirteen. Your dad on the other hand was much shadier letting you do it. And even Lucas still can't handle it sometimes. WE DON'T PAY THEM ALL THAT MONEY FOR NOTHING. Well, we're very happy that we've pulled you over to the dark side. All part of our plan for world domination.
Riley: I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT. EVERYTHING I DID WAS GREAT! EXCEPT THAT TIME I TRIED TO BOOP LUCAS'S NOSE 😣 I know Uncle Eric was working on trying to make them see it was real but I think he lost some of his credibility in Washington when they found out he had an alter ego named Mr. Squirrels 😑 Daddy was such a weird teacher, wasn't he? But I'm still kind of glad he followed us all the way up, so many other teachers tried to make us LEARN stuff. Omg I'm not on the dark side yet, Farkle. You'd have to hire me to be the official Minkus International Photographer or something first 📷
Text ⇆ Riarkle
Farkle: I know, we're trying to patent a bunch of new clean energy tech to make being green more affordable for consumers. 🌷 They're right about the lava, that's for sure. But you know I don't really believe in the whole astral planes thing, or even the religion thing period. I'll have PR put a purple cat on it just for you. 🐱
Riley: This is such an improvement from that time you tricked me into feeding our classmates nothing but sugar! Saving the world now, I like it 🌏😍🌍😍🌎 I know, I know. I stopped trying to make you and Maya believe all the same things as me a long time ago. THEY CAN DO THAT? I officially love Minkus International 😃
Text ⇆ Riarkle
Farkle: I wouldn't mind having a slightly more relaxed schedule but I think my dad will let that happen about the same time as hell freezes over. Huh, well if anyone could do it, it'd be Smackle, but why hack when you could get someone to make you a cool lanyard instead? ;P
Riley: You're going to be waiting a long time, since we're going through a global warming and not a global cooling 😭 Although all those cartoons that make hell seem like it's at the core of the Earth could be wrong! Ooooh, does it come in purple? 😍
Text ⇆ Riarkle
Farkle: We can't all stay up as late as you young whippersnappers. Hmmm, it depends who your favorite genius is. I realize Smackle is all cool and going to medical school but it better be me. :P
Riley: I meant early like super young compared to the old businessmen! But I do like my relaxed photographer schedule, too 😇 Unless Smackle knows how to hack into Minkus International's security system I meant you, silly.
Text ⇆ Riarkle
Farkle: THEY'RE SO BAD RILEY! WHY ARE THEY ALL SO OLD? Well, a kidnapper could totally get in through the door if she were to pick up a security badge from the front desk.
Riley: That's what happens when you're a genius who starts work so early 😛 How does one get authorized for a security badge? Would her favorite genius be able to put her on a list?
Text ⇆ Riarkle
Farkle: Riles!!! I need you to save me from boardroom meetings, the shareholders are slowly killing me with boredom.
Riley: BAD SHAREHOLDERS! Let's say I have a plan. How would a kidnapper get into Minkus International?
SO WE MEET AGAIN → RIARKLE F2F
[Farkle chuckled to himself, knowing Maya she probably hadn’t even really enjoyed throwing ice cream in her best friend’s face.] “She probably would have found it a lot more fun if she was doing it to Lucas. Or even Zay.” [It was definitely weird that Yarby had survived the longest out of all their middle school romances. A year ago people might have started taking bets on when he and Smackle would have been engaged, scary as it was. Yogi and Darby fit a lot better though.] “They’re good for each other, weirdly enough. I guess sometimes the most unexpected combinations have the best results. Opposites attract, in scientific terms.” [He shook his head.] “I wouldn’t be surprised if Yogi’s been dropping hints. You know how off in her own world Darby is.”
[Farkle wanted to ask what kind of new ‘friends’ she meant. Either way, no Parisian boys seemed to permanently sweep Riley off her feet and talk her into living in a small college not far from the Tower Eiffel so it wasn’t like he could be upset. He was way past the days of being jealous of Riley talking to other boys, namely Lucas and his freak perfect genetics, but still. Nowadays all he wanted was for her to be happy.] “I think you’re way overestimating how important I am, Riley. If I wasn’t there to drink coffee and push paper someone else would do it.” [He still couldn’t help but feel flattered by her compliments though. The fact that she thought he was important was more than enough for him.] “I don’t think I could eat cotton candy ice cream with anyone else though. It’d be like eating a chimichanga without Maya or something.” [He made a scrunched up face for emphasis.] “Just too weird.” [He nodded quietly as she spoke, trying to find something to say. She’d seen so much and he’d been donig the same old thing every year.] “I’m glad you had fun, Riles, but I’m glad you’re back too.” [He paused for a second, and before he could stop himself her added,] “I missed you a lot. And sometimes I was worried you never would.”
“Or you.” [Riley giggled, thinking of all the time she’d spent with Maya and Farkle together. Even though he loved them both the same, that didn’t mean that Riley and Farkle’s friendship was identical to the one he shared with Maya. Her best friend definitely did a lot more of the tough love thing when it came to their favorite genius, and as long as it stayed friendly ribbing, it was funny to watch. She hoped there would be a time soon where they’d all be together, but for right now, she was more than elated just to be back at Farkle’s side.] “And like forces repel! Just because I didn’t major in science doesn’t mean I don’t remember.” [Riley beamed at him, proud to have retained something that she’d heard him say so many times when they were younger. It was nice to know that her memories hadn’t slipped away with all the time and space between them.]
“You’ll always be important to me, Farkle, no matter what other people think.” [Riley meant it with every fiber of her being. She’d thought of her friends often while she was gone, always thinking that it was amazing to see new things, but it would be better if they were all there to share them with her. Like thinking of Farkle in Belgium, or Lucas in Paris, or Maya at the van Gogh museum in Amsterdam. It was nice to hear that Farkle shared her sentiments, and Riley stood a little taller, happy that he’d saved some traditions just for them. She may have been all around the world, but some things just weren’t the same with new people.] “I missed you too! I could never stay away forever, life just wasn’t the same without you. Besides, we made a promise, didn’t we? That we’d all end up back here together when we were done with college?” [Riley tried to ignore the fact that it was just the two of them; the others still had time, it would all be okay. For now, she’d focus on the amazing person she had here with her already.] “Plus I have tons of pictures to show you -- it’s not as good as getting to travel around the world with me, but I’ve gotten decent enough that it might come close, if I tell the stories right.”
SO WE MEET AGAIN → RIARKLE F2F
[Farkle smiled, remembering the nights he’d visited Riley for a scoop of cookies and cream after interning at his dad’s company. Typically by the time he got there she already had a waffle cone ready and waiting for him.] “I don’t know if that would have worked out quite as well for her, Riles. Besides, she didn’t exactly seem to love it the time you threw ice cream in her face.” [Talking about high school made something deep in Farkle’s stomach feel full and warm, he hadn’t even realized it was empty. His friends had been gone for so long that maybe the easiest thing for him had been to turn off the part of him that had missed them so much, the part that had replayed those memories over and over his freshman year.] “Most of them might, but I think Maya would still appreciate a good cheesy Yogi. Darby might not though.” [Farkle did his best to beam back at Riley, sweeping his current feelings under the rug. He knew if he gave her any inclination about how he was really feeling she’d want to talk it out and fix him. And he didn’t know if he was ready for that yet.] “New York is great. There are so many new places to eat that I’ll have to show you. This one place, it’s amazing. They make this ice cream that really tastes like cotton candy, you’d love it. I took Zay there last time he was home but he wasn’t cool enough to appreciate. My parents are good. Uh, dad’s in England for business and Mom’s in Paris doing research for our first beauty venture or whatever.” [He paused, knowing what she was insinuating and couldn’t help a crooked smile taking over his face even though his ‘um’ life was pretty depressing.] “Um…um is pretty the same. Still non-existent. Going to be that way for the foreseeable future.” [He bit his lip slightly, not sure if he should ask what he was thinking but he decided to go for it anyways.] “How’s your um life?”
[Riley blushed; it may have been eight years since that had happened, but Riley still remembered it like it was yesterday. It wasn’t one of her prouder moments, but Farkle had been the first one to figure out what was going on with her, and together, they’d all made it through. When her friends were around, Riley felt like she could take on the world, and it hadn’t been so easy for her to build up to feeling like that on her own. Now, though, Riley had finally come into her own -- she’d found something that she’d loved and she was good at, and the only thing that could have made it any better was having her friends there to share in it with her. Reliving old times like this just made her heart ache to have all of them back together again, the way they’d always promised.] “She got to shove ice cream in my face to make it even, at least! And wow, I can’t believe Darby and Yogi are still together after all this time. Last time I talked to Zay he said he was going to start taking bets on when they were going to get engaged, isn’t that funny?”
[Riley hung onto Farkle’s every word, wondering how she’d ever let it go so long without finding out what it was up to. And while the thought of cotton candy ice cream and visits from Zay and his parents getting to travel all brought smiles to her face, the talk of his dating life made her cheeks flush slightly, especially when the question was turned back on her.] “Oh, well that’s okay. I’m sure someone as busy and important as you doesn’t need, um, you know, distractions while you’re just getting started with the company. Once you’ve settled down more I bet you’ll find somebody really great -- but if she doesn’t appreciate that amazing cotton candy ice cream you were talking about, I’m going to have to have a talk with her!” [Riley paused for a second, not sure how to answer on her own part. There had been cute boys all around the world, of course, but it felt like she couldn’t even remember any of them now that she was home.] “I met a lot of really cool people while I was studying abroad, but when you’re never in one place for very long, all you want is to make new friends. Or at least, that’s how I felt -- make new friends, but keep the old.” [The last bit she tacked on to make sure that he knew she’d never forgotten about him, even though sometimes Riley worried that her friends had started to forget about her while she’d been away.]
SO WE MEET AGAIN → RIARKLE F2F
[Farkle laughed, saying Topanga wasn’t the greatest with customers was the understatement of the century but leave it to Riley to make things sound more positive.] “You could definitely say that. I think her waitressing works out about as well as if Maya tried customer service for a living.” [He cringed slightly, remembering the first summer they’d all gotten jobs. Maya had spent a very ill-conceived two weeks working as a counter girl at the Duane Reade on her street corner before being fired for throwing a bottle of shampoo at a customer.] “It’s lucky she has Katy around to run things for her, she’s definitely more suited to the business side of things.” [Farkle found it hard to be offended by Riley wrinkling her nose, mostly because there was a large part of his younger self who’s heart still skipped a beat whenever she did anything remotely endearing. But still, wind power was one of the coolest things he’d done lately and it was on the ‘bleh’ side of things.] “It’s really not that cool, most of it’s tech stuff that even bores me. Nothing like the marble experiment or trying to make a cheesy Yogi.” [Sometimes Farkle regretted going into business and not science. World domination was something he’d wanted when he was young very much, but he didn’t think he was cut out to be a high stakes businessman like his father.]
[Riley giggled along with Farkle at the memory; Maya definitely had a lower tolerance for the customers than she did.] “I told her she should have worked at the Haagen Dazs in the village with me! It’s hard to be mad around ice cream... and even if she threw it, I bet it would hurt a lot less than that shampoo bottle did!” [Now, the only thing Maya would ever have to throw on the job would be paints, or whatever she was using in her latest work of art, and even though Riley hadn’t been here to share it with her, the thought made her fill with pride. She was proud of Farkle, too, even as he shrugged off his accomplishment.] “No, no, it is really cool, I promise! And the world probably appreciates everything you’re doing more than they appreciated cheesy Yogi, even if they were totally missing out.” [Riley beamed at him, wondering why he didn’t seem more excited about the work he was doing. They’d all gone off to pursue what they loved -- that was the only reason that growing apart was okay, if they were accomplishing their dreams, right?] “But work’s not everything! Tell me what else has been happening. How’s New York? How are your parents? How’s, um...” [Riley nibbled on her bottom lip for a second, unable to remember if he was dating anybody at the moment or not and feeling guilty for it.] “Just tell me everything, Farkle. I’ve missed you, a lot.”
SO WE MEET AGAIN → RIARKLE F2F
[No-one else gave hugs like Riley. Everything about her was warm and happy and her hugs were no different. She threw herself into hugs with everything she had, like there was no-one else in the world she would rather be touching - although by this point Farkle was all too aware that there was and it was Maya. Still, surrounded by that happy Riley smell - vanilla and apples - and that warm, welcoming way she wrapped her arms around his neck and practically threw herself into him. It was impossible not to feel safe and happy. He could feel his brain waking up, telling him there was finally something worth paying attention to around.]
“Your mom also works for the most feared law firm in the City,” [Farkle smiled, his eyes quickly traveling over to where Maya’s mother stood at the counter. She was still talking the ear off of some trucker.] “But I guess if she was here, I’d already have my tea and I wouldn’t get to see you.” [He could feel his smile falter slightly as she pulled away, but not by much. His brain processed her words. Riley was back, back for good. Or for a good six months anyways. And that was the best news he’d heard since - Well, probably since his friends had all received college acceptance letters to different parts of the country.] “I, uh…” [Farkle tried to think of anything remotely interesting that sounded half as good as Riley being back in New York. His brain was still stuck on that, pretty much setting off fireworks and streamers at the thought.] “I, um, I’m investing in wind power?” [He mentally slapped himself for that being the best thing he could come up with, but sadly since he and Smackle had broken up over the previous Christmas it wasn’t like he’d been doing much else.]
[Riley didn’t even pout when Farkle mentioned her mom’s (in her opinion) less exciting job as a lawyer. She should have been disappointed that her mom wasn’t here at the cafe like she’d planned, but as long as Farkle was around, it was hard to miss Topanga too much. In fact, her mom she could easily see later when she got home; Farkle, who knew when she’d see him again? The thought sobered her -- there had been a time where she could have counted on him to show up at her bay window during her long talks with Maya, or bump into him in the hallways every morning at school. Now, though, Riley rested her hand on his shoulder and leaned against him, not wanting to let him get away the same way that Maya had.]
“Mom’s still not great with the customers, then?” [Riley asked, giggling at a distant memory of how excited her mom had been when she’d thought that throwing muffins at customers was allowed. Of course, that had been a special case, with Maya’s mom throwing them at her dad when he’d showed up. With a pang of guilt, Riley realized she didn’t even have any idea if Maya had talked to the man recently -- once she’d had time to settle back in, calling her best friend from a country that wouldn’t make the conversation cost a ton of money was a must.] “Wind power?” [Riley winkled her nose, puzzled but excited nonetheless. Despite the big deal she’d made about how girls should be allowed to participate in sciences if they wanted to, Riley herself hadn’t pursued that career, so it seemed like a foreign concept to her, but that was okay. It was Farkle talking, and she’d have been excited no matter what he was telling her; the fact that she was talking to him face to face again at all was more than enough. She had a million questions to ask, but no idea where to even start after being away for so long.] “Is that what your job is? Just picking cool stuff to invest in?”
SO WE MEET AGAIN → RIARKLE F2F
[Farkle was running late for his morning meeting. It seemed like he was habitually behind schedule lately. At night he’d stay up well past midnight running numbers and coming up with new tech ideas and then he’d barely drag himself out of bed to get a black tea at Topanga’s. He should really just start pushing back meetings until noon but then he ran the risk of falling asleep at his desk. It was a dangerous cycle. And as much as Farkle loved Maya’s mom but having her talk customers ears off when he was waiting for his to-go cup was delaying him further.
He sat down at one of the tables, grumpily awaiting his caffeine intake when he felt a hand on his shoulder. He was about to tell the person who belonged to it off when he heard a familiar happy voice. His jaw dropped and he turned around. Sure enough, there she was.] “Riley,” [He said in shock, standing up without meaning to. He hadn’t been expecting to see her until graduation when they all reunited in the city. He’d though she was due to go another semester abroad in …Italy, Indonesia, Ireland…something with an I. She’d done so many exchange programs he’d lost count.] “What are you doing here?” [He asked, feeling his brain kick on and a smile pop onto his face.]
[For a moment, Riley waited with bated breath, afraid that she’d been gone so long that she didn’t even recognize one of her oldest friends anymore and that she’d approached a total stranger. But then Farkle stood up, and she could practically see the lightbulb going off in his head when he realized who he was talking to. Without hesitation, Riley set her cocoa down on his table and she threw her arms around him, acting as familiar as they’d been the day they’d all graduated high school, even though deep down, if she was really honest with herself, she knew that time and distance had taken a toll on all of their friendships. She didn’t even know exactly what Farkle was up to these days, but she hoped that she’d get a chance to catch up with him and find out more about his work at Minkus International.]
“My mom works here, silly! What are you doing here?” [Riley’s smile didn’t just turn up the corners of her lips, or reveal her teeth because it was so wide; it carried all the way up to her eyes, which crinkled in happiness. It had been way too long since she’d seen her friend, and it hadn’t even hit her just how much she’d truly missed him until right here, in this moment. Realizing they were probably causing a scene, Riley reluctantly pulled back from the hug, practically bouncing on the balls of her feet from excitement.] “I just got back last night, but I’m doing my last semester at Tisch. There are enough exciting things to photograph in New York, and I’ve just... been away too long, I think. But enough about me, tell me about you! How have you been?”
SO WE MEET AGAIN → RIARKLE F2F
[Riley was ushered down the sidewalk as part of a large group of people making their way through the city streets, and she couldn’t help but smile at the familiar noise and bustling movement of New York City. She’d missed it while she was away -- and more than the city itself, she’d missed the people she loved most, her friends and especially her family. That was why, less than 24 hours after she’d gotten home, she found her way down the familiar steps to Topanga’s, wanting a hot chocolate and an excuse to spend more time with her mother after months away. She waved eagerly at Katy Hart behind the counter as she crossed the threshold of the little shop, placing an order when she didn’t see her mom anywhere.
Hot cocoa in hand, she looked for an empty spot, and saw one of the few open chairs in the place... directly across from a familiar face. Riley tried to wave to get his attention, calling out ‘Farkle!’ excitedly through the crowd, but he was too caught up in whatever was on his phone screen to notice. Sure, it had been too long since they’d spoken, but he wouldn’t ignore one of his oldest friends, would he? Deciding to try again, Riley crossed the room to where he was sitting, placing her hand gently on his shoulder from behind and speaking in a more tentative voice this time.] “Farkle?”
@minkus-international
The world is big and I want to have a good look at it before it gets dark.
John Muir (via beautyandtheuniverse)