Well here we are again, new girlfriend same story. I don’t know if it’s cosmic karma from something or just me being taught a lesson. But she texts me this morning, she was out with freinds lastnight and part of the freind group was someone she used to sleep with and have a fling with. Well they kissed and had sex, I’m in shock. I can’t scream, I can’t cry I sit in silence. I just feel broken like I don’t know what’s next. I told her I’m in love with her for fucks sake, we look at houses and spend every minute together. Yesterday like we talked about having sec and she said all the freaky stuff she wants to do to me and now all I can think of is her with this guy. It makes me curl up in a ball and I have a pit of a stomach. I don’t know whats next I wanted this to work so bad, I just wanna plead to anyone or something to fix it but I don’t know if I can or that’s the right thing to do. I’ve been cheated on before and I don’t know if I can get past it. I’m just in awe of someone who has had all sort of bad stuff happen to them can turn around and do it to someone else. I wouldn’t given anything, I’ would’ve taken the stars in the night to light up her world. I’m hurt and I know they only thing to get through is to accept it.
I still have questions like am I enough? Why? You tell me all the time you care so much but why this?
