My name is Brandon Boulware and, Chairman, Iâll go as quickly as I can. Iâm a lifelong Missourian, Iâm a busy lawyer, Iâm a Christian, Iâm the son of a Methodist minister, Iâm a husband, and Iâm the father of four kidsâtwo boys, two girlsâincluding a wonderful and beautiful transgender daughter. Today happens to be her birthday. And I chose to be here. She doesnât know that. She thinks Iâm at work. Â
One thing I often hear when transgender issues are discussed is, âI donât get it. I donât understand.â And I would expect some of you to have said that and to feel the same way. I didnât get it either. For years, I didnât get it. For years, I would not let my daughter wear girl clothes. I did not let her play with girl toys. I forced my daughter to wear boy clothes, and get short haircuts, and play on boyâs sports teams. Why did I do this? To protect my child. I did not want my daughter or her siblings to get teased. And truth be told, I did it to protect myself as well. I wanted to avoid those inevitable questions as to why my child did not look and act like a boy. Â
My child was miserable. I cannot overstate that. She was absolutely miserable. Especially at school. No confidence, no friends, no laughter. I can honestly say thisâI had a child who did not smile. We did that for years. We did that against the advice of teachers, therapists, and other experts. Â
I remember the day everything changed for me. I got home from work, and my daughter and her brother were in the front lawn. And she had sneaked on one of her older sisterâs play dresses. And they wanted to go across the street and play with the neighborsâ kids. It was time for dinner, I said, âCome in.â She asked, can she go across the street. I said no. She asked me if she went inside and put on boy clothes, could she then go across the street and play. And it was then that it hit me. My daughter was equating being good with being someone else. I was teaching her to deny who she is. As a parent, the one thing we cannot do, the one thing, is silence our childâs spirit. Â
And so on that day, my wife and I stopped silencing out childâs spirit. The moment we allowed my daughter to be who she is, to grow her hair, to wear the clothes she wanted to wear, she was a different child. And I mean it was immediate. It was a total transformation. I now have a confident, a smiling, a happy daughter. She plays on girlsâ volleyball teams. She has friendships. Sheâs a kid. Â
I came here today as a parent to share my story. I need you to understand that this language, if it becomes law, will have real effects on real people. It will affect my daughter. It will mean she cannot play on the girlsâ volleyball team, or dance squad, or tennis team. I ask you, please donât take that away from my daughter, or the countless others like her who are out there. Let them have their childhoods, let them be who they are. I ask you to vote against this legislation.
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