montage of me

18 ⭐︎ Vegan ⭐︎ Asexual ⭐︎ Enby ⭐︎ British

[valtsv]

allow me to slip into something a little more… comfortable *is enveloped in fog and disappears never to be seen or heard from again*

[teenagecrush]

[tradgothwillbyers]

Y'all ever just suddenly have the overwhelming urge to swim??? Like not actively but you just wanna,,, be in the water and have some Peace

[parttimepup]

Yes it’s called the mammalian diving response and it’s also why doing face masks and taking a shower is soothing. Our amphibian ancestors used this mechanism to slow down the heartbeat and lower body temperature so as not to waste calories while swimming (which is very calorie intensive). It makes you feel safe because predators are less likely to get you in water than on land. The fish brain is alive and well in all of us.

[beyondthetemples-ooc]

It’s literally activated by putting water on the face.

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3768097/

[dogs4ge]

My amphibian ancestors gave me the instinct to dissociate in the shower for hours on end

[altonzm-deactivated20170213]

french recipes: if you’re not making this in paris then what’s the point. fuck you

italian recipes: use the left leg meat of a pig from one of three farms in this specific area of tuscany, or from this day my grandmother will begin manifesting physically in your house

[thirdtimecharmed]

american recipes: buy these three cans of stuff and put them in a pan congrats you cooked

[svynakee]

chinese recipes, as handed down from mother to child: season it with a pinch of this and some of that. you want to know the exact amount? feel it in your heart. ask the stars. yell into the void. 

[orriculum]

English recipes: boil and salt it. Okay that’s it enjoy

[digitalfare]

Greek recipes: You followed all the right steps but this isn’t quite right. I don’t know what to tell you.

[jamesandlilys]

Australia recipes: chuck it on the barbie

[monsterhighalumni]

Latinx recipes: you will never make it better than your abuela, face the facts

[wereyoulookingforsomething-deac]

Armenian recipes: spend eight days laboring over the stove. the food will be flavorful with the sacrifice of your sanity. no one will appreciate it.

[moldychesee]

Canadian recipes: It either needs more bacon, more maple syrup, more gravy, or an unholy combination of the three

[dixon-arrows-deactivated2018052]

Polish recipes: you have to toUCH THE DOUGH, FEEL THE PIEROGI IN YOUR HEART, TOUCH IT. LICK IT. SMELL IT.

[beckyhop]

Every time I see this post, I learn more about how different countries’ cuisines AND neuroses.

[visionssofgideon]

Indian recipes: there are 500 cuisines and that means 500 versions of this dish that has 500 spices so gl 

[onceuponamirror]

ashki jewish recipes: no, no. no. more onion. 

[jumpingjacktrash]

internet recipes: here is a heartwarming story about my baby sister’s third birthday that i completely made up, and a copypaste from alton brown.

[piedude]

Irish recipes:

[recharm-deactivated20140718]

if u feel sad right now look at this bunny eating a flower

[markv5]

[teachingliteracy]

[remindie]

[hippiesispunkz]

[moniabadir]

[vanish]

[ginkasei]

links to individual images and short definitions below

cupioromantic   quoiromantic   frayromantic sapphic   enbian   achillean

first masterpost buy these here!

[po1arbae]

is it even worth dating someone if you know your relationship has a best before date?

[po1arbae]

current mood

[po1arbae]

she smells like lemongrass and sleep

she tastes like apple juice and peach

you would find her in a polaroid picture

and she means everything to me

[po1arbae]

I am so blind in love

[po1arbae]

why is it that I, being openly asexual, am asked regularly if I want to have sex, or am told, ‘if you ever want casual sex I’m always here’ ???