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“It is better to be alone, she figures, than to be with someone who can’t see who you are.”

— E. Lockhart, The Disreputable History of Frankie Landau-Banks

re-unknown

My head hurts but enjoy.

gomcgill

I hope that in this year to come, you make mistakes. Because if you are making mistakes, then you are making new things, trying new things, learning, living, pushing yourself, changing yourself, changing your world. You are doing things you have never done before, and more importantly, you are doing something. So that is my wish for you, and all of us. And my wish for myself. Make new mistakes. Make glorious, amazing mistakes. Make mistakes nobody has ever made before. Do not freeze, do not stop, do not worry that it is not good enough, or it is not perfect, whatever it is. Art, or love, or work or family or life. Whatever it is you are scared of doing, do it. Make your mistakes. Next year and forever and ever.

Neil Gaiman (via mysimplereminders)

me: *about to send someone a message*

myself: hey

me: ? hey what's

myself: if they wanted to have any kind of contact w/ you they would have initiated it.

me: alright, neat, neat concept, but communication is actually a two-way street so

myself: they have no desire to speak to you and never have any desire to speak to you, ever. they never think of you. they will never think of you, at all, ever, even in passing. you are nothing.

me, tossing my phone out the window: alright! neat! awesome! fantastic!

remusprongsandprefectsnogging

Marauders at Disney

James and Sirius, upon entering the park, make a beeline to secure fast passes for their favorite rides (the ones like Matterhorn, Indiana Jones, Space Mountain, etc.)

At this point, Remus is really regretting not investing in a pair of those child-leashes that a good third of the parents at the theme park are sporting.

Peter tries running after Sirius and James, but gives up (not being fast enough) and hangs back alongside Remus, getting distracted by the array of gift/candy shops lining Main Street USA

Remus has to get a picture of Sleeping Beauty’s castle upon entering. He just has to.

James and Sirius are really smug when they get to cut in front of everyone with their fast passes. Remus just gives apologetic looks, and Peter has to shovel down the pretzel he bought before they get on the ride.

Ok, so considering the average temperature for Scotland during the summer time is around fifty seven degrees, and for southern California (L.A.) it’s around eighty one- they’re dying.

James and Sirius are wearing the bare minimum, and Remus has to rent a locker to stuff his sweater into

Sirius is rocking a man bun

James buys a Wizard Mickey hat and absolutely refuses to take it off

Peter may or may not be on his fifth churro by the time lunch rolls around

Remus really enjoys the small corners and alleys of the park where the crowd thins

Peter gets a coonskin hat from frontierland

Lots of shameless flirting with princesses coming from Sirius that result in autographs with the occasional phone number attached.

James seeing the Ariel and automatically missing Lily

Peter getting sick on the teacups ride after James decides to spin theirs as fast as he fucking can.

Lots of “JAMES NO!”

Sirius and James, after hearing about the two hundred feral cats that prowl the park at night, decide to go on a hunt for them

They legit smuggle cat nip inside the park and search the bushes for cats

Remus is so done with everyone’s shit

He just wants to have a normal visit at Disneyland is that so hard to ask?

Peter really wants to watch the parades, but Remus sees this as an opportune time to beat the crowds (now gathered along the street) to the rides

Remus is honestly ride or die. He doesn’t fuck with these slow ass tourists who have no idea where they’re going. He knows where to go and everyone is getting in his way.

Sirius getting picked on by characters (i.e. Chip ‘n Dale tugging on his man bun and snickering at it)

James in a flexing contest with Gaston

Remus only taking pictures the Mickey and Friends characters

And he’s all embarrassed to walk up to them at first

James taking the mic from the tour guide on Jungle Cruise because he thinks his jokes are lame, so he starts dishing out puns like its nothing and does a mic drop

Peter screaming a little too shrilly when the Yeti pops out on the Matterhorn

Sirius and James trying to find the entrance to the secret basketball court on the matterhorn

Also using alohomora to get into restricted areas of the park

Sirius singing Small World on repeat

James trying to harmonize

Remus really likes walking through Sleeping Beauty’s Castle (James and Sirius are hardly impressed)

But his favorite ride is the Disneyland Rail Road

Peter’s favorite ride is Star Tours and he convinces the others to ride it at least four times throughout the day.

James’ favorite ride is Indiana Jones. When he sees the snake statues in the ride, he mutters “Snivellus?”

Sirius prefers Pirates of the Caribbean

Remus getting really insecure because he notices little kids looking at the scars on his face with mild confusion- some are even scared

But then Peter Pan comes over and he does his thing. He tells Remus (making a big show of it so that others can hear) that he must’ve put up a good fight against the “pirate” that did that, and comments on how brave he is

Remus is just smiling the entire time and plays along with Peter Pan, and the kids gathered around are awestruck

Sirius and James posing for the camera on Splash Mountain

Having to restrain Sirius and James from jumping into the Rivers of America to get to the island

Eu estou fazendo 25 anos. A coisa mais constante e motivadora da minha vida é meu trabalho. Eu tenho dificuldade de me relacionar com as pessoas. Eu não sei fazer isso. Eu não sei se quero fazer isso. Boa parte do meu cotidiano é em um mar de gente, mas a sensação que tenho é que estou sozinho nele. E perto de me afogar. Eu não sei como estou me sentindo em relação aos meus amigos. Eu estou triste, desapontado com alguns. Eu sinto que os deixo tristes e desapontados também, então é um empate. Eu sinto que eu desapontei muita gente. Eu sinto isso cada vez mais. Eu sinto saudade também. Eu penso em gente que não deveria pensar. Penso até em tentar falar com gente que poderia causar efeitos ruins em mim. Eu estou triste e desapontado. Inclusive comigo, porque queria tanto seguir, fazer novas coisas, mas me prendo aqui. Sozinho. Sem conexões. Me isolando. Sendo isolado. Me vendo ser ignorado e colocado em escanteio. Colocando outras pessoas em escanteio. Eu sei que não deveria me sentir assim. Mas eu me sinto. É foda. Não devia. Mas bate forte. Bate mesmo. Eu peço que me perdoem. Eu não sei se perdoaria algumas coisas. Eu estou aqui me sentindo sozinho no aniversário mais solitário de minha vida. A que ponto chegamos, não? Quantos pontos mais terão?