Polyamory Ponderings

A place for my wife and me to share some thoughts as we walk our polyamory journey.

[kimchicuddles]

TikvaWolf.com

[polyamory-ponderings]

Veto is a very outdated idea for poly relationships. DO NOT DO THIS!!

[polyamory-ponderings]

Hi I wanted to ask a question... I have a boyfriend and he’s a system (he has DID) and so because of how many alters he has and because one of them is dating someone else we are in a polyamorous relationship, so is it ok with polyam people if I call myself polyam? I was also wondering if you had any tips as to how I can be a good partner because I kinda get jealous of having to share my boyfriend with other alters. I just want to be a good boyfriend.

Hi,There is a lot of good information on dealing with jealousy located at:https://www.morethantwo.com/jealousy-insecurity.html

[polyamory-ponderings]

I don't know if I'm poly. I think I might be. I have a partner and love him very much. But I also desire having a second partner. Ideally it'd be all three of us together instead of me dating both of them but them not dating each other. I'd never want more than two partners. Thing is... I wouldn't want an open relationship shit where we're free to date whoever. I'd want a committed closed relationship with three people. Is this polyamory? Is this okay? Sorry if I said something rude. Thanks

Hi,Yes, this is a form of polyamory. Polyamory comes in many forms, and the one you describe is considered a closed triad. What ever form you want your poly relationships to looklike  is perfectly ok, as long as it's okay with all your partners.

[polyamory-ponderings]

Hey, can I ask about the difference between polyamory and polysexuality? I never heard about polysexuality before but I saw a flag and I'd like to know.

Hi, this question has been asked before. You can see my reply at: https://polyamory-ponderings.tumblr.com/post/164373830117/whats-the-difference-between-polysexual-and

[polyamory-ponderings]

Found some polyamorous bath oil today. "Give your skin extra lovin'"

[lunarbaboon]

Lunarbaboon

[polyamory-ponderings]

❤️ Happy Valentine's day everyone - especially my special loves @learning2bmeagain and @polyamorous-tangles you're both perfect ❤️

[kimchicuddles]

I’m always confused by what the people in the #StandardPolyStockPhoto are DOING and why their feet are always sticking off the bed. So I decided to start writing my own narratives… Website: KimchiCuddles.com

If you’re amused, throw some dollars at my Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/kimchicuddles

[polyamory-ponderings]

Hahaha, these are awesome!

[kimchicuddles]

Valentine Card Bundles are now up in the shop! Order soon to make sure you get them in time. In this bundle of 16 cards, there’s something for everyone in your polycule, including metamours! <3 <3 <3 

https://squareup.com/store/kimchicuddles

[polyamory-ponderings]

Awesome!

[kimchicuddles]

A vital part of cultivating consent culture is knowing HOW TO LISTEN for consent.

♥ PATREON: http://bit.ly/2fRfWTW ♥ SHOP & PORTRAITS: http://squ.re/2wWBlRq

[lunarbaboon]

Lunarbaboon facebook twitter patreon

[polyamory-ponderings]

Excellent comic

[polyamory-ponderings]

What do you recommend I read to be able to have a better understanding of an open relationship and of how to have a better experience with my open relationship.

I will always recommend More Than Two by Franklin Veaux and Eve Rickert.

[polyamorous-tangles]

Professor Marston & the Wonder Women Trailer #1 (2017) | Movieclips Trailer

[polyamory-ponderings]

Oooo, this looks good. 👍

[polyamory-ponderings]

My best friend and her husband are in an open relationship – and it’s making me question some things

Advice: I feel very strange about us even hanging out with them, like will it be a matter of time before they suggest a foursome?

[kimchicuddles]

Does polyamory effect promiscuity?

Keep Kimchi Cuddles (and my other projects) going strong by becoming a patron! Thank you SO MUCH for your support!! ♥ https://www.patreon.com/kimchicuddles

[polyamory-ponderings]

Do you think that people, especially the younger generation, are taking polamory as a sign to be promiscuous? I've read some of the postings and I am getting the sense that they are not getting the true meaning of what it means to be poly.

You say promiscuous like it’s a bad thing. 😀 What is wrong with being promiscuous?

The true meaning of polyamory is maintaining multiple, simultaneous relationships, with the full knowledge and consent of all the people involved. If a person chooses to be promiscuous and all their partners know and are ok with it, then where is the problem?

I fail to see how age would be an issue. My partners have all kinds of stories of men they’ve met who say they are poly but are only saying that to cheat on their partner, or treat people as possessions. That said, there are many people of all ages who are great examples of polyamorous relationships. And to be honest, I’ve seen better examples of polyamory from younger people, which may be because they are more open about being poly than older people are.

[polyamory-ponderings]

What's the difference between polysexual and polyamorous?

Good question. The short answer is: polysexual refers to sexual orientation or preference, and polyamorous refers to a relationship orientation or preference. For the long answer...Let's separate the words into their various parts - poly+sexual and poly+amorous. The prefix 'poly' means many. The root sexual here is used to define a person's sexual identity, orientation, or preferenceThe root amorous refers to showing, or expressing love.So, poly+sexual = attraction to, or preference for many sexualities. A polysexual person would be one who is attracted to more than one gender and/or gender expression (including non-binary), but not all of them.Some examples:A polysexual person might like penises and vaginas, and be attracted to cis and trans women, but not men. Another polysexual person may like penises but not vaginas, and be attracted to cis men and trans women, but not women or trans men.These are just 2 examples, there are many other combination possibilities.By contrast, and as an aside, a pansexual person would be attracted to all genders (including non-binary ones). The prefix 'pan' means all.Poly+amorous = many loves, or the act of showing love to many people at the same time. A polyamorous person, maintains or desires multiple romantic and/or sexual relationships simultaneously, with the full knowledge and consent of all the people involved.

[polyamory-ponderings]

Hi! So I don't really know the difference between polygamy and polyamory. Can you explain?

Good question.

Polygamy is the practice of marrying multiple spouses. I.e., one woman with many husbands (polyandry), or one man with many wives (polygyny). In a polygamous marriage, the spouses typically would not be allowed to marry another person. For example, the women married to one man, would not be allowed to seek out, date, or marry another man (or woman I suppose). The same would be true of the husbands married to one woman.

Polyamory is the practice of having more than one romantic and/or sexual relationship at the same time with the full knowledge and consent of all the people involved.

Polyamory is not necessarily related to marriage - a polyamorous person may have one spouse, or no spouse. Also, in polyamory, your partner(s) may also have other partners