you can be peeling a boiled egg and think to yourself wow. that was so simple. and then you peel another one and it’s like being in the throes of war. shell everywhere. egg mangled. tears in your eyes. that’s how god keeps you humble

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you can be peeling a boiled egg and think to yourself wow. that was so simple. and then you peel another one and it’s like being in the throes of war. shell everywhere. egg mangled. tears in your eyes. that’s how god keeps you humble
shamed:(
one thing about me is I’m gonna go home
just look at this little guy
Adulthood is like I have to go buy more shampoo. I have to go buy more coffee grounds. I have to go buy more eggs. I have to go buy more toilet paper. I have to go buy more paper towels. I have to go buy more cumin. I have to clean the dishes so they can get dirty again. I have to do my laundry so it can get dirty again. I have to clean the bathroom so it can get dirty again. I have to buy more cleaner to clean the bathroom. I have to go buy more rice. I have to cook dinner. I have to cook dinner. I have to go buy more shampoo again.
one thing about me is i will be in bed
so the academy is reviewing whether or not to remove Will Smith’s award and here are some interesting tweets about that :)
being a mcu actor has gotta be like a horror film you wake up and go to your little green screen box a man in a trenchcoat hands you the script for the day and every other line is redacted you dont even know what movie youre filming they put a nerf gun to your head that theyll cgi later and are like. say the lines tom.
"he is not my president" bumper sticker with a picture of some random guy that has never been president
what they dont tell you about those little hand baskets in the grocery store is if you put enough things in them they get heavy
the feminine urge to just get sad out of nowhere
idk why groceries cost money like girl i need them