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You've got your passion, you've got your pride. Don't you know that only fools are satisfied? Primrose Smee. Call me Posey. 20. Junior at Walt U. Baby Ambrosius Coming December 2020

[poseysmee]

INSTAGRAM: @POSEYSMOSEY UPLOADED A PHOTO!

12.31.20. happy new year  🌻

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[poseysmee]

what's the best part about pregnancy?

Well, for the most part I’m enjoying my cravings (this isn’t the lie, wait for it).  And I love popcorn and have been craving popcorn and I have huge bags of popcorn to snack on in the dorm. (Still not the lie!) But did you know that when you’re growing a human the calcium can get straight-up yoinked out of your teeth to make the baby’s bones? So you can end up with super brittle teeth that BREAK WHEN YOU EAT POPCORN??? (Still not the lie!) So yeah, that’s probably my favorite part about all this. Breaking two teeth so far, and the fact that I’m willing to break more teeth just to enjoy some kettle corn like a dum-dum! (Okay, that was the lie.) Pregnancy priorities are wild, dude! 

ASK ME ANYTHING AND I’LL ANSWER WITH DEFINITE LIES.

[poseysmee]

INSTAGRAM DM | POVIE

@sylvie: I think that might have been really smart, lol. How does he feel now? Orion hasn't been stabbed with a sword yet, so is he taking it well? Omigosh, yeah, Rafe, that's who I was thinking of! And good! Reading always helps me learn new things! Do you think he'll let you babysit his baby for practice? Practice probably isn't the right/best word, but it's the best I can think of, lol!

@sylvie: Of course he is! I even like his nickname, even though I know he doesn't, but I know nothing like that actually happened at Waltfest because that's the first place we got to like, actually meet and talk and stuff! Well, there was a lot of yelling because it was Waltfest and loud, but still! I DON'T KNOW! :( We were literally all hanging out and playing Truth or Dare and I had to go potty, so I excused myself real politely and everything was fine! Or I thought it was? What if it wasn't?! D: I don't even know when he left! :( I ran into that dying fire dancer guy I told you about on my way back (which was totally NOT fine!) and I was helping him and helping someone not die when they are like, so hot they are burning up and dying from lack of water and exhaustion is not a fast thing! Maybe I took too long coming back and he thought I left first and so he left too??? I just don't really know and that's the worst feeling! :(

@poseysmosey: Orion is handling it like the best guy ever, I love him so much. 😭 I'd be so down to babysit Tallulah, tbh! It'd be so much fun. Which btw, I heard that my BROTHER babysat Tallulah over the summer which is SO WEIRD AND WILD.

@poseysmosey: ...huh, that's so weird! I got nothin'. :( Cause him thinking you ditched him to go hang out with the fire dancer guy is like waaaaaaay too teen drama, right?

@poseysmosey: OMG!!!! HOT!!!! HE TOTALLY DID, cause he told you to go be with someone hotter than him!!!! OMG SYLVIE YOU'RE IN A TEEN DRAMA.

[poseysmee]

Are you excited about becoming a mom?

*gasp* I’m pregnant!?! 

(Just kidding, the real lie is no, I’m not excited at all which would make the truth that I’m actually ecstatic.) 

ASK ME ANYTHING AND I’LL ANSWER WITH DEFINITE LIES.

[poseysmee]

INSTAGRAM DM | POVIE

@sylvie: Of course it isn't weird! It's the coolest news I've heard all year! You're going to be the best cool young parents in Walt! And like, all the mom's in Walt are young, lol. And you even have people who know what it's like to be young parents close to you to help you if you need it, don't you?! You've literally got like, a ship village of support, so you'll never have to worry if you get overwelmed or anything because you'll have so many people who love you and will help if you ask. And probably even if you don't ask, lol. Omigosh, I'd be honored to make a cake for the baby shower when it happens! Just say the word, I'm your girl!

@sylvie: Not a poop dump! A poopy dump though. :( NO!!! Of course he isn't! He's one of the smartest people I've ever met! And he said he still loves me! There was just a lot to it! I think...? I don't know??? Like, a LOT happened that night and it kind of all happened at once maybe??? I honestly don't know. :( He said it wasn't my fault, which sounds like one of those like, "It's not you, it's me" things, but how could it be him??? He's perfect! But then he lost me even more and started talking about not blaming me if I wanted to be with someone hotter and cooler than him??? And that I could live on Hawaii with Noli and live happily ever after working out with fire dancer guys and while I love Noli and Hawaii was great until my boyfriend disappeared without a word to go home, that sounds like THE WORST BFF RomCom! Like a fire dancer guy almost DIED that night, Posey! It was awful! Even if I didn't love Baz with like, every peace of my heart, I could NOT live in fear like that every day!

@sylvie: Omigosh, I'm so sorry! That was a lot of unnecessary stuff all at once! D:

@poseysmosey: Well, I kind of had to keep things hush from my ship so Jay wouldn't sword my baby daddy to death. But I reached out to Rafe as soon as I got here! He's gonna give me all the articles he read about parenting lol.

@poseysmosey: The Waltfest Wanker being perfect in your eyes is like, super cute 'n adorable. 😂 That's all so WILD!!! It must be a misunderstanding??? Cause there's no way he would just ditch you for no reason! What happened before he lefT?

[poseysmee]

INSTAGRAM DM | POVIE

@sylvie: Omigosh, Orion is going to be a dad! That's so beautiful! You two are going to be such great parents! And omigosh, what a wonderful way to bring in the new year! And double omigosh, Jelly Bean is so cute! Posey! Have I already said you're going to be a great mom?! Because you're going to be such a great mom! If you need absolutely ANYTHING, just let me know! I'm not so good at a lot of stuff, but I'm really good at some! Like I can make cakes and sew and I'm a really good listener if you ever just need a listener while you eat cake!

@sylvie: I love infodumps! Especially more than real dumps... Which is what happened in Hawaii... Well, kind of... But we don't need to talk about that! I'm sure my aunties know great remedies for morning sickness, if you're still getting sick! I can ask them!

@poseysmosey: Isn't it weird??? We're gonna be such young parents. Cool parents, but young. You've said it a bunch! And idk man, I've never had a mom so I reeeeeally don't know if I'll actually be good, but I'll certainly just...try. And that's all I can do. I'll totally reach out if I need anything from you! Maybe a cake for the baby shower when it happens. :P

@poseysmosey: A DUMP???? Like, not a poop right? Like, you GOT dumped? In Hawaii??? IS BAZ STUPID????????

[poseysmee]

INSTAGRAM DM | POVIE

@sylvie: YOU'RE SO MUCH MORE THAN WELCOME! You're going to be a MOM! That's absolutely something to be excited and scared but mostly excited about! Hawaii was exciting at first, but then like, not so exciting and more scary at the end of the trip...but that's just Hawaii, that's nothing compared to growing a life inside of you and becoming a MOM! I cannot get over how happy I am for you! And Orion, right?! I've been told not to assume things, but Orion is the dad right? Do you know when your due date is? Do you know if it's a boy or a girl? Do you have name ideas? POSEY! THIS IS SO EXCITING! You're going to be such a great mom!

@poseysmosey: omg yeah it's Orion's 😂 Super accident, totally my fault, he's the best in the world for going along with it. Due date is roughly December 30th, we don't know the gender yet and idk if I want to know right now omg I've kind of just been calling it Jelly Bean but I've been throwing flower names at Orion and seeing which ones make him go :/ so I know which ones are total Nos, which has been most of them so far. 😂

@poseysmosey: but that was a lot of infodump, pleeeeeeease tell me more about Hawaii cause I was puking while you all were having the time of your lives!

[poseysmee]

INSTAGRAM DM | POVIE

@sylvie: Omigosh, omigosh, omigosh! POSEY! I'm so happy for you, congradulations! Omigosh!

@poseysmosey: THANK YOU!!! I'm super excited and scared, but mostly excited. 😊😊😊 How was Hawaii??

[poseysmee]

TEXT | SMIBS

Elodie: Protect them from what? The baby isn't even born yet! The only one that could do something to it is you! And if you're worried about Jay, he's all bark and very little bite. Plus, we both know I'm his favorite so I could've talked him off any ledge! Or plank. I'm not mad, I'm just sad! I want you to be able to come to me no matter what! I feel like I've failed you!

Posey: I don't know WHAT Jay would do, he thinks me having a baby is getting in the way of my "pirate career" 🙄🙄🙄he's like, delusional. You were also IN JAIL APPARENTLY? So I wouldn't have been able to come to you irregardless!!!

Posey: but omg no, you didn't fail me, I'm just scared, I think. Like, scared of birthing a child into a super scary world, scared of giving it one of our very many Smee issues, etc. etc. Me hiding it from you is not your fault at all.

[novambrosius]

Well, Walt, can’t I say I missed you. Although it is definitely better than listening to my crazy father spout off god knows what to absolutely no one all summer. Is it incredibly lame that I’m actually excited to start this semester? 

[poseysmee]

I think your dad’s lovely! So understanding about everything, and he’s gonna be the best granddad. Isn’t it crazy this semester that Orion and I are gonna be parents? And you’re gonna be an aunt? Wild! 

[poseysmee]

TEXT | SMIBS

Jay: You're not dumb. You should've used /extra/.

Jay: Ugh. Disgusting. Whatever. I don't hate you. But your piratey career is over, which is more of a disappointment than anything.

Posey: I know, I know. I got to that chapter in my Gestation to Birth text book a little late.

Posey: My piratey career was over yeeeeeears ago. I've literally never wanted to pirate anything! So this is kind of a perfect way to explain that to dad.

[poseysmee]

TEXT | SMIBS

Elodie: No, Posey-Q! You’re not cute-ing your way out of this one! How are we, YOUR SIBLINGS, the last ones to know!!!

Posey: because you are the people I was hiding it from!!!!

Posey: But not because I didn't want you to know, because I wanted to protect Orion and the baby. It's been so super awful not having my big sister holding my hand through this. 🥺 Please don't be mad.

[poseysmee]

TEXT | SMIBS

Jay: Oh, m'sorry! I didn't know that a MOTHER knew about the kid lingo.

Jay: Obviously you know a lot about protection.

Posey: Ugh, Jay don't be like this! We used protection, we just used it...wrong. Cause I'm dumb.

Posey: But he's the most amazing guy and we're gonna do this together and I want our baby to be born into a stress-free environment so PLEASE DON'T HATE ME.

[poseysmee]

TEXT | SMIBS

Jay: new number, who's this?

Posey: ohhhhh my God first of all it's 'new phone who dis' and secondly don't ignore me! I just needed to wait to tell you guys til we were protected by Walt. I didn't want you freaking out at Orion.

[poseysmee]

TEXT | SMIBS

Posey: I SWEAR I WAS GOING TO TELL YOU.

[elodiesmee]

Hellllllooooooo, Walt! After an extended vacation in an Italian prison I am back and mostly straight edge! Except for the drinking, obviously, but I will no longer be following handsome men on their very long backpacking trips! Also they do not have pastries in Italian prison. 

[poseysmee]

El, that’s crazy! How long were you there? Why didn’t you call me or Jay to bail you out?! Also did you get in there for stalking the backpack guy?! I have so many questions. We should hang out and you can answer them! 

[poseysmee]

INSTAGRAM: @POSEYSMOSEY UPLOADED A PHOTO!

Wow I’m really into Walt’s new look! I already love it here. 🤩

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