Hello! I am graduating from college in a year (go Class of 2018!), and am hoping to raise money in a post-grad fund. This fundraising will go towards living expenses, including: first month(s) of apartment rent, utility costs, groceries, etc. I will be applying to jobs throughout my last year of...
Hi, everyone. I’m posting this separately from my main account because it has my name on it, and I have some family members who might know my account name. More detail on why below the Read More line; TW, emotional abuse mentions.
The basic gist of this post is that I’m raising money to act as a safety net for a little bit after I graduate college next year. It’s a bit of an odd crowdfunding subject, but I felt I’d give it a try.
When I live at my parents’ house, I am in an emotionally abusive environment. It’s taken 4 years of living away from home to fully realize that no, screaming at a child for not realizing what you meant is not normal.
My parents’ decision to remove my older sibling’s bedroom door from its hinges when they disobeyed my parents in high school is not normal.
My mother either guilt-tripping me by saying she’s a terrible mother or getting angry whenever I ask her if she could go talk to someone about anger issues is not normal.
My mother getting angry at me and telling me to stop crying when I was upset (as a middle school student) that she and other members of my family were fighting in front of me was not normal.
When I said I felt like the fighting between my parents and my oldest sibling was tearing the family apart, and my mom responded by saying “if anything’s tearing the family apart, it’s you and [younger sibling] bickering”, that was not normal.
My mother kicking me out of the house for several hours after telling me that she must be a terrible mother because she’s raised such terrible children, all because I asked if I could have my laptop back after she had borrowed it for an hour, is. Not. Normal.
These are just a few examples, and most of them are from when I’ve only been around my family. However, there have been multiple incidents besides these. I have several people who are close to me and can testify to the fact that my mother is emotionally abusive and it is not healthy for me to be around her for extended periods of time, due to incidents they have personally witnessed.
With that said, said mother has been trying to pressure me into living in the cottage in my parents’ backyard. While this would be ideal without the information mentioned above since it would be rent-free, I am not comfortable with literally living in the backyard of the home of the person who emotionally abused me and continues to do so if I am around her for long periods of time.
I am living away from them this summer, luckily, but there have already been some incidents in periods of seeing her that have each been no longer than 4 days at a time. This post is getting very long, so if you want to know more about these, feel free to message me privately. She does not respect boundaries, she does not respect her children’s choices unless they align with hers, and she yells, guilt trips, and gaslights if her disagreement does not get an immediate response of some form of, “you’re right.”
If you got this far down, thank you so much for reading. If you do not feel comfortable sharing the post or are not able to donate, I completely understand. I’m mainly sending feelers out on as many networks as I can, because being stuck with my parents is my worst possible situation and I can’t be sure of what my employment situation will be this time next year. Thank you again, and best wishes.
