First Encounter or Solving for Ex in a Vorny fashion or Eating the Hypotenuse Or Eating the Ex or Eating X.
Alternatively I had too many titles which are puns and I couldn’t pick one
I glanced at my date who was smiling blithely as she lifted her glass to her lips and drank. I felt insanely lucky, I had had a crush on her for maybe 2, 3 years, that hadn’t gone away. I swallowed a piece of chicken as I reflected on the days when I had flushed red when she had spoken to me. The way that she would poke me in the chest when I teased her. But she was in a relationship, and though I felt a little jealous, I knew that it wouldn’t be a good thing to do to try and step in on that relationship. I had my head screwed on after all and knew that devouring the competition was a quite frankly unwise thing to do. No matter how much I wanted to do it.
Yandere I may be, but only slightly, and I’m not about to eat someone just because they are in a relationship with the person I like. Not only would that not be right…. Maybe, my stomach might have disagreed with me on that point. But it might make her hate me, and I didn’t want that.
“Uuhhh yeah” I replied nearly choking
“It took you long enough to ask me out”
“Wait what?” I panicked had she noticed the crush I had had on her, was she about to dump me after only 3/4 of a date.
“Yeah I had been broken up with my dear ex a few weeks before you asked me out on a dinner date.”
“Oh well I, um” I hesitated the main reason I hadn’t asked her out then had been twofold, number one I didn’t want to look over zealous and excited now that their ex wasn’t in the picture, and two, well I was a coward, I was nervous about asking them out and getting rejected. In addition they themselves were probably upset, although when they announced to us all that they and that asshole were through they didn’t seem that unhappy, if anything they seemed quite happy and had looked at me for first comment.
“If you were worrying about being too forward I wouldn’t be worried” she said smiling “he wasn’t a very nice person” I stopped my forkful of food halfway to my lips
“That my ex wasn’t well not really a nice partner” they shrugged and drained their glass “to be honest this first date with you is far nicer than my first date with him was”
I felt something clench around my throat then, not nice, how dare anyone not be nice to my beautiful date, how could anyone fail to treat her like the royalty she was.
“If you don’t mind me asking” I said “What was their whole deal, I didn’t really spend a lot of time around you both, when you were together”
She blinked at me “Yeah, sure, he was just kinda rude to me, belittled me and was just kind of a dick” she laughed “ha but I thought you knew this stuff, did our mutual friends not tell you?”
They must have not to keep me from eating that…. Person I thought to myself. Quickly I bolted down the rest of my meal. It tasted really good but I had other plans.
“Here” I said pulling my wallet out of my pocket and depositing both cash and my card onto the table “I promised I’d pay, and I will, I just need to do something”
“You haven’t eaten desert yet” she said raising their eyebrow “A sweet tooth like you, they have a really good trifle, my stomach growled at that and said to me we can always get a entremet before our desert I replied we want our desert to be an actual desert, My stomach replied duly noted, the ex can serve as entremet.
“I will be back for desert I promise” I said and I scurried out the door.
I knew her ex lived not too far from this restaurant, and bolted as fast as I could to their house, the goal in my mind was clear, to get the ex in my stomach and to remove him from my list of problems, as well as my date’s
I will admit, the reasoning behind this decision was again two fold, firstly I was appalled by the idea anyone could treat my date so shamefully as to be rude and to belittle them, I wouldn’t have been surprised if they had done worse perhaps stalked my date, but I didn’t want to pry, all I had seen was red when they told me their ex had upset them.
The second part was pure jealousy that had shot to the surface, yes it was a selfish one, but cut me some slack, I was still quite hungry.
I arrived outside her ex’s house and wrinkled my nose at the smell emanating from it. I knocked on the door. I waited a moment and then it was opened by the ex, my soon to be meal, he looked up at me confused for a second then recognition dawned on his face.
“Oh so you are the guy whose going round with my ex”
“She’s not yours, not anymore” I growled
“Did she send you, that would be typical of her, can’t fight her own battles” He laughed and leaned causally against the door “can’t t fight anything physically or mentally the dumb..”
“Don’t talk about her like that” I snarled “My darling is far smarter and more capable than you’ll ever be”
“Calling them your darling already” he replied “this is only your first date” suddenly he leered “OHHH” they exclaimed “You’ve had a thing for them for years” he laughed
“How the hell do you know it was out first date”
“Oh I’ve been keeping tabs on her” he smirked “that’s pitiful, I suppose they don’t have taste at all, puppies are more to her taste than my thing with more than two brain cells”
“You” I felt a painful hunger growl from my stomach, it demanded its meal, after all the meal in question was practically begging to be devoured
The ex looked down at my stomach “Have you come before dinner to confront…” and then they looked in my face which already had drool leaking from the corner of my mouth “Oh” and laughed again “so that’s her game” another horrible laugh “send hungry and obedient Prince Charming, to deal with the vile fiend”
“Shut it” I snapped Desperate hunger rising mixed with something else a mad desire to remove any threat to the one I had loved for so long.
“Ha” he cackled “and why should I when you so very clearly know it to be true”
“She didn’t send me” I growled “I came by myself, I don’t want you hurting her anymore, she is far too good for you”
“That I happen to feel isn’t the only reason”
“Fine” I snarled “I also want you off of my list of problems” I leaned forward my face was covered in drool and I wiped it away “I have wanted to devour you from the moment I realised you were in a relationship with my darling, but I held back because I wanted her to be happy and I didn’t want her to resent me” my voice broke slightly “but you, you have squandered you chance to be in a relationship with her, I might not deserve her, but I know one thing for sure, you don’t”
“What a cry baby” he laughed “Couldn’t handle anyone with an Alpha energy” a grin, a nasty one “So went with a pathetic loser instead” he stared at my stomach as though fascinated by the organ “and a glutton to”
My stomach growled insistently again this one very clearly and very loud and I nearly bent from the pain and also the embarrassment
“Really pathetic controlled by your heart and your stomach”
“He always did have horrible taste, in clothing, shoes, games and books, shows” they shook their head, “and now we can add men to the list”
“Stop it now” I said quietly
“Though to be honest, I never imagined that such a loser would ever settle for an even bigger loser”
That finally made me snap, any reservation I had about devouring him went away no longer was this mostly selfish, this asshole had insulted what was mine, or at least I hoped would be mine, I have never liked him, to begin with. Now I had very good reason to want to shovel him into my mouth and down my throat.
I lunged forward blindly striking the ex barely managed to escape the strike and swung back at me, hitting my jaw and sending me back clutching it. “You’re crazy”
“Maybe I am” my voice was now calm and I stood back up again revealing a little in the look of fear
“Here, now wait a moment, I”
I lunged forward again grabbing him in both hands and raising them to my dripping maw “Food doesn’t talk” I whispered and then I stuffed them down my throat, groaning in satisfaction as they reached by stomach and began to curl up. I quickly undid the buttons on my shirt and trousers not wanting them to burst from the expanding stomach. I didn’t need to worry too much about my prey escaping as soon as the shoulders and chest were down my throat there wasn’t much he could do to escape my stomach.
As he filled my cavernous and ravenous stomach, still filled with my two courses and bread that I had eaten before I groaned in a mingled feeling of satisfaction and pleasure, and looked up to see two of their housemates staring at me.
“Um, OURRRRRRRP” I belched and they scattered like mice from a cat, or a dog more like I thought to myself. My unwilling meal was thrashing about desperately attempting to escape. It hurt a little, not emotionally I couldn’t give a damn what food thought of me, but physically it was rather uncomfortable.
I whined and belched again “Urgh Please sourrrrrrrrrrrp, stop, OURRRRRRP, doing that URRRRRRRRP”
“Lunatic” came the voice from my stomach “of course I’m escaping”
“Urghhh, and then I’m going to beat the crap out of you”
“BARRRRRP” was all I had to say in response.
“Dear” came a voice that both me and my meal recognised
“Oh no…” I said and another belch slipped from my lips please no I don’t want to be seen like this
“Looks like you’re going to have to let me out then” said my food triumphantly “and a good thing too it’s filled here with food”
“You are food” I said quietly
“My stomach would beg to differ” I said
Then I froze for out of the shadows of the night came her beautiful hair neatly arranged on her head looking every bit a radiant beauty and she staring at me, or more specifically my midriff, I went red with embarrassment.
“You just-” shock clearly visible upon her face
“It’s nothing” I lied, how on earth I expected to get away with that lie, I had no idea.
“It very clearly isn’t nothing” she said staring at it “who or what is inside your stomach”
“I I” I hung my head in shame “I ate your ex” I mumbled
“He ate me” snapped my meal
Shock passed over her face and she glanced at my face
I expected her to turn tail and run, to not want to even consider being with this monster in front of her, what I was not expecting was for her to step forward and slowly reach out a hand to touch my stomach.
I flinched “whaOURRRRRRRP” I clapped a hand over my mouth embarrassed by the attention and by the belch “sorry”
“Don’t apologise” she said her dark black hair falling in waves framed her face so beautifully “please don’t apologise”
“Shh” her hand reached my stomach and she touched it, she touched me. We hadn’t even kissed or held hands, sure I had hugged her before, allot of times, but this, this was different. I whined at her touch and flushed red
“Don’t be don’t be” she smiled “Does that feel good?”
“Yesss OURRRRP” I groaned, my unwilling meal thrashed in my stomach.
“He’s not settling down is he” she said
“NoOURRRRRP” I said belching mid sentence
“LET ME OUT” came the yell from inside my stomach.
“The solution here is obvious” she said smiling at me
“Wha-OURRRRRP” I belched again
“We fill up the space in your belly”
“We fill you all the way up to the top so that you are nice and full”
“Are you flustered pet” she said
“Quite an active belly” she said patting my belly and releasing another belch from it “Mmnmmnn but it’ll need filled all the way to the top so that you stop belching mmmmm besides that restaurant had good deserts on the menu and I think I can get another main into you.”
My gluttony was fighting a war with my common sense and for a brief moment my brain stuttered into life and I said “I I I just ate your ex aren’t you aren’t you horrified”
“No not really” her hands caressed my belly and I moaned feeling blissed out
“You you don’t think I’m a OURRRRRRRRP monster?”
“No buts” she squeezed my gut making me moan and then took me by the hand and led me back to the restaurant
We arrived and the Maitre D looked mildly shocked at my entrance but reseated us at our table and presented me with another menu at my dates request luckily our table was secluded one so I didn’t disturb other diners with my digestive noises.
I was red in the face though as my date my darling, unabashedly continued to minister to my gut which was digesting her ex who was shortly joined by an entire main course consisting of a steak and mashed potatoes and then by two deserts. She was practically pinning me to my chair as she stroked my gut helping me belch when she said.
That was enough to make my brain completely short circuit “ar ah ah ah ha ha OURRRRRRRP”
“Oh my that was a bug belch guess you’re not filled up yet”
I whine “I’m so so full darling” I belch again feeling food drunk
“You are full when I say you are full” she intoned
That did it for me I moaned and obeyed her without question eating lasagne and another desert till I swore I was so full that I wouldn’t be able to move
“I need to to digest this all” a small amount of drool was leaving my mouth and I was now lying on the floor of the restaurant belly on full display, had this been me in a normal state U would have been mortified as it was I didn’t have the energy to care. My belly was roaring as it digested its mammoth meal delighted to be able to reduce it all into fuel for me and of course more mass for my body.
She smiled at me and said “Well done” she tenderly kissed the prodigious curve of my belly “thank you, do you want me to pay?”
“No no no” I groaned “I’ll pay”
There was a back and forth before she revealed that she had already paid
“But I ate so much mmmf more than you?”
“Mnmm. But I devoured you with my eyes so we’re even”
She helped me out of the restaurant and took me back to her place where she sat me down in her bed and rubbed my gut listening to the sounds of digestion. She even stripped my out of my suit leaving me lying on her bed my ginormous belly taking up so much room he smaller frame was spread over me rubbing my belly and helping it break down my dinner and of course her ex into more of me.
“Thank you my pet” she said kissing my gut
I slowly fell asleep as my gut churned away.
The next morning I awoke bleary eyed and mildly disoriented I became acutely aware that I was half naked and that my darling date was also half naked whilst my brain struggled to put together what had happened the night before I belch wetly and a half digested skull flies out of my mouth
“What my darling” she stirs and I gaze at her in horror and shock and attempt to hide the half digested skull.
“It it it’s how are we how are you?”
She had seen the skull and a very almost sinister smile took her face as she lifted it and grinned “you did it you really digested him”
All of the memories came flooding back to me our meeting for dinner, me leaving, me eating her ex her rubbing my belly her feeding me and finally her rubbing my belly in bed before we fell asleep.
“About eating your ex I I am so so sorry can you forgive me I I don’t want you to think I’m a monster” now I was no longer blissed out on the feeling of a full belly I am in full panic mode and I start to cry.
She gently pats my back and soothes me “Pet darling, I would never think you are a monster you are so sweet and gentle and loving the perfect boyfriend ,much better than him”
“Ah ah no buts well except yours mmmmm later I want to see what he contributed to you I can already see lovely love handles”
I blush “you you think they’re lovely”
“Yes” she grinned “I prefer men with meat on their bones, women with meat on their bones too if it comes to that”
I felt a jealous urge rise in me “but but I’m the only person you’ll be romantic for right right!”
“What a jealous little pet, Mann of course”
Her verbal assurance made me happy and I kissed her “sorry I shouldn’t have been rude”
She laughed a beautiful sound “don’t worry at all you are hardly anywhere near as half as rude to me as my ex was on the daily or on a good day at your rudest!” She lifted the skull and grinned at it morbidly “alas poor ex was this to be your fate digested down to but fuel and fat upon the stomach of a man so much better than you”
“why are you performing a vorny version of Hamlet with your ex’s half digested skull?” I asked with mild concern
“Must just be crazy” she said “like he always said”
“You’re not crazy I mean I ate the dude”
“Hmmm he may have had a point but hmmm I’ll never admit that” she clambered onto my lap and grinned at me “there’s so many people I want to feed you now pet mmnmmn and you are going to eat them all aren’t you?”
My belly growls imagining the feast that it will have my heart, belly and head are aligned and I kiss her deeply, when we break apart she laughs “I’ll take that as a yes then?”
“You betcha” I said licking my lips as my belly begins to growl once more.