Inhale The Good Shit, Exhale The Bullshit

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[pretty-little-anchovy]

I’m so very, utterly, painfully, and unbearably alone…

[pretty-little-anchovy]

I found out I’m probably going to die young.

I’m going to die young,

With no knowledge or recollection of my surroundings.

Scared and angry and confused.

I guess that’s good news for someone who never wanted to live to begin with.

But now I’m afraid,

I can barely stand myself now, and it’s going to get worse.

I understand now why the leading cause of death of this illness is suicide.

Because what kind of life is one where you know you are slowly loosing control.

I’m scared

[pretty-little-anchovy]

Hey google,

Search “how to kill myself”

No not that

I’ve done that

It doesn’t help

Hey google,

Search “everything is falling apart and I have nothing left”

Search “how to kill yourself without really killing yourself because in actuality your just tired of being friendless, talentless, and unwanted by any job you thought you could achieve”

Search “how to not be exhausted from just existing every day”

Search “please something anything help me”

Search engines have never been any good I guess.

They dont find the answers anyone is really looking for.

Technology is made of hope and wonder and without it I guess it’s useless.

[pretty-little-anchovy]

Moved, turned twenty-two, friends are few,

Pals fade, like morning dew.

Silent screens, unanswered calls,

In this solitude, my spirit falls.

Bills loom large, meds out of grasp,

Left my job, escaped its clasp.

Survival's game, an endless race,

Tired of the fight, tired of the chase.

No silver lining, just endless night,

In the void, I lose the fight.

No more trying, just weary bones,

In this world, I feel so alone.

[metamorphesque]

“I was always ashamed to take. So I gave. It was not a virtue. It was a disguise.”

— Anaïs Nin, The Diary Of Anais Nin, Vol. 4: 1944-1947

[tonysopranobignaturals-deactiva]

starting to think I may actually have some issues and even perhaps problems

[trees-and-planets]

— Albert Camus, The Possessed

[typewriter-worries]

[ Text ID: Yes, be patient with me. My heart is heavy. ]

[kosmogrl]

what they don't tell you about your 20s is that you'll want to leave but you don't because you're scared of the unknown

[wordfather]

i am aware of the problems. however. i would rather be comfy in my bed. good night.

[thoughtcascades]

I love asking 7 different people for advice then do what i want

[sleuthgueth-archive-deactivated]

Being a lesbian named Fisher is so hard. I'm Fish. women want me. I'm scared all the time

[sleuthgueth-archive-deactivated]

You CANNOT do this to me

[coruscantknave]

sometimes having a cool name comes at a cost

its the Fisher price

[sleuthgueth-archive-deactivated]

BOOS YOU VERY LOUDLY OFF THE STAGE

[pretty-little-anchovy]

Holy shit it’s me

[922703]

My look is attractively ambiguous. Am I cute? Am I ugly? You don’t know . You need a second opinion .

[sharkboxes]

[bowtiefox]

[tshifty]

part of me is like “what the fuck do you mean next week is august when last week was mid april” but then the other part of me is like “approximately 7 years have passed since december 2019 and july 2020″ so that’s fun

[elliot-in-progress]

[ashleyfluid-blog]

Me: *literally in tears over dysphoria*

Also Me: But am i faking it????

[tysatan-moved-blog]

Me when I passed the trans guy at school who started testosterone