thoughts on gay words

23 ○ he/him ○ nonsensical rambles

[clockworkbee]

Fuck all romances except whatever that boy who owned the invisible museum and that boy who carried the meteorites inside a bag had going on <333

[nemesis-is-my-middle-name]

"doesn't this charater under insane stress going through extremely traumatic events realize how inconvenient their irrational emotional reactions are to the people around them?" well, see, you're not gonna believe this, but the thing is,

[proseverence]

The hopeful trajectory of Noah's first chapter means the world to me.

It began with this burning shame clouding his art. Violent panic obscuring his incredible fondness of self-portraits and charcoal and the whites he uses to color his sister's eyes. His pride meant nothing in the face of survival, and he lost himself in black page after black page after black page, scribbling in a little cove no one else could find.

"I sit down and open my sketchbook. I black out a whole blank page, and then another, and another. I press so hard, I break stick after stick, using each one down to the very nub, so it's like the blackness is coming out of my finger, out of me, and onto the page."

Noah stresses over the parts of himself he keeps tucked away from the world, worried they'd be forced into the light—bare to the judgmental eyes of his father, of Zephyr, of Jude.

"I put all my effort in trying not to cry. A sickly ferret feeling is burrowing itself into every corner of my body as I pant my last breaths. And even if they don't kill me hear and now, by tonight everyone on the hill will know what just happened."

So he crawls into himself, time and time again. Pulls down the shutter between his secrets and the people around him. Unzipping the air and disappearing inside it.

“A Series: Boy Inside a Box of Darkness.”

... And then it ends with a sparkle of pride lighting up his mother's eyes. His shutters raised, his pride beaming, and he describes the warmth radiating from her as a pool of light, shining on all the hidden parts of himself and loving them indiscriminately.

“Self Portrait: Boy Dives Into a Lake of Light”

The chapter details how often Noah felt unseen, or purposely went out of his way to seem smaller, to disappear—but in a little café sat at the top of an art museum, he basks in the freedom of being known. He preens under a gaze he previously would've hoped no one caught—he volunteers to showcase his hard work.

“He winked at me. Like he knows. But it doesn’t feel bad. Not at all.”

I can't help but root for him.

[vault-heck]

We all love the "becoming the very thing you sought to destroy," trope. but I have a growing fondness for "destroying the very thing you sought to become"

[prokopetz]

If you're lamenting the fact that you used to be able to shoot through a 500-page novel in like a day when you were in middle school and now you can't, it's worth bearing in mind that a big part of that is because when you were in middle school, your reading comprehension sucked. Yes, mental health and the stresses of adult life can definitely be factors, but it's also the case that reading is typically more effortful as an adult because you've learned to Ponder The Implications. The material isn't just skimming over the surface of your brain anymore, and some of the spoons you used to spend on maximising your daily page count are now spent on actually thinking about what you're reading!

[prokopetz]

Reading as a kid: "I can tell that this is supposed to be an emotionally moving ending, but I genuinely cannot remember who two-thirds of these characters are."

Reading as an adult: *reads a paragraph* *pauses* *reads the same paragraph again* *flips back and re-reads the preceding page to make sure you didn't misunderstand something* *stares into space for ten minutes as the Implications sink in*

[wiltkingart]

Shining Talon from Master of One by Jaida Jones and Dani Bennett

[proseverence]

"The difficultly Somhairle often felt in speaking to his mother was that she was responding to a different son: the one she wanted rather than the one she had. The birds weren't insignificant to him. Perhaps Guaire had been trying to spare him the embarrassment of bringing his small concerns before their mother, whose kingdom consisted primarily of actual people, not doves and starlings."

My latest heartbreak is Somhairle sending letters of the dying doves to his family. The idea that, in a land barren of real company, he'd come to treat the birds as his citizens—that he treated their illness with the care one would reserve for friends and family.

And to have his family belittle him for showing such sensitivity to their passing. Them, viewing it as childish affection, taking for granted the faces and conversation they get to pass every day; whereas Somhairle's only familiar faces were the beaks buried in his backyard.

To make fun of him for finding companionship in the only company he'd been allowed to have. What a cruel reminder that he exists so far at the edges of their thoughts that they couldn't extend any sympathy to the reality of his conditions, any understanding to his exile.

[proseverence]

Bennett and Jones created such artful foreshadowing here; beginning the chapter with birds dropping dead from the sky, ending it with Somhairle recieving the news of Tomman's death—one of the only companions he'd ever known, even if for a brief time. The last starling in his backyard.

[tychodorian]

The LitRPG genre is a unique literary niche that transports readers into immersive worlds reminiscent of video games and tabletop RPGs. It's a literary playground where game mechanics, character progression, and RPG elements drive the narrative forward. Imagine stepping into a virtual realm where every decision, action, and encounter carries weight, much like in your favorite gaming adventures.

In King of Dust, I've taken the essence of LitRPG and woven it into a rich tapestry of fantasy, comedy, and LGBTQ romance. Set in the land of Starkovia, readers will follow the journey of Darius, a protagonist grappling with the weight of his past and the complexities of his present. As Darius navigates the treacherous terrain of Starkovia, he'll encounter formidable foes, forge unlikely alliances, and embark on quests that will test his strength, resolve, and morality.

What sets King of Dust apart is its seamless integration of gaming elements into the narrative fabric. From epic boss battles to side quests, every aspect of the story is steeped in the rich tradition of RPG gaming. Whether you're a seasoned gamer or a newcomer to the genre, King of Dust offers a thrilling and immersive reading experience that will keep you on the edge of your seat.

If trying out this genre interests you, you can check out King of Dust on Kickstarter! The link is in my pinned post (look for the Linktree, and then head on over to the Kickstarter!)

[proseverence]

"The difficultly Somhairle often felt in speaking to his mother was that she was responding to a different son: the one she wanted rather than the one she had. The birds weren't insignificant to him. Perhaps Guaire had been trying to spare him the embarrassment of bringing his small concerns before their mother, whose kingdom consisted primarily of actual people, not doves and starlings."

My latest heartbreak is Somhairle sending letters of the dying doves to his family. The idea that, in a land barren of real company, he'd come to treat the birds as his citizens—that he treated their illness with the care one would reserve for friends and family.

And to have his family belittle him for showing such sensitivity to their passing. Them, viewing it as childish affection, taking for granted the faces and conversation they get to pass every day; whereas Somhairle's only familiar faces were the beaks buried in his backyard.

To make fun of him for finding companionship in the only company he'd been allowed to have. What a cruel reminder that he exists so far at the edges of their thoughts that they couldn't extend any sympathy to the reality of his conditions, any understanding to his exile.

[not-poignant]

Birthday Spotlight - The Raven Prince

[20th February - Pisces]

The Raven Prince has been a highly divisive character since introduced. Beloved Unseelie King who created the most peaceable reign in existence for the Unseelie fae, or evil, cunning and manipulative trickster, he's a character that often has people feeling everything for him from pure hatred, to hero worship, to general love, to constant suspicion. And you know what? He'd love that.

The Raven Prince is a raven shifter who gave himself the name 'the Raven Prince' long before he ever became royalty, famously eating his true name from the minds of his parents. His true Unseelie appetite is feeding on words, languages, writing and even culture. He is a world class Master Mage, more powerful than anyone will ever truly comprehend, and he prefers diplomacy over bloodshed, but that doesn't mean he won't make mischief, or ruin someone's life, especially if he feels slighted.

The Raven Prince has been trickster, villain, antihero, hero, and just a raven. He has a complex relationship with everyone, but those who get to know him, tend to adore him.

But a story then? All right. I make no pretence at being a storyteller, I’m only a raven, and we only croak and caw don’t we? Try and find something of use in my words, or don’t, it matters little to me.

The Ice Plague II

Game Theory - (canon) Mentioned in the very first chapter, but never seen in the story, the Raven Prince's presence was already established as the 'King that Augus deposed/defeated' and drew everyone's suspicions towards him long before he ever officially became a villain who needed to be defeated by Gwyn ap Nudd. For years, no one - including readers - knew how Augus defeated the Raven Prince. And Augus wasn't about to tell a soul.

The Ice Plague II - The Seething Seas - (canon) The Raven Prince returns in the flesh for the first time in the canon, and manages to save everyone's ass several times over. But he does it in ways that doesn't endear him to anyone, and he seems to prefer it that way, right up until Augus breaks his heart.

A Broken Feather, Straightened - (canon) Asexual, sex averse, and not prone to romanticism, the Raven Prince is curious, nonetheless, about Augus' vocation as a professional dominant. Augus is determined to make the Raven Prince his, in his quest to eventually make him vulnerable enough to defeat.

These Troubled Times - (canon) Augus is determined to try and defeat the Raven Prince, and the Raven Prince is determined to make sure Augus is aware of his place beneath him, as servant and not master.

Deeper into the Woods - (canon) Mentioned only

The Nightingale and Terho the Mouse-Lad - (canon) Mentioned only

The Court of Five Thrones - (canon) Shown in Augus' flashbacks, and the question of how the Raven Prince was defeated is finally answered.

The Ice Plague I - A Forest of Fire - (canon) Only mentioned here.

The Ice Plague III - The Ice Plague - (canon) Creating a holograph of himself within a crystal to teach Mosk magic, his lessons are invaluable in teaching Mosk the finer points of learning magecraft.

All that We Were, All that We Will Ever Be - (canon) In Gwyn's and Augus' happy ending, the Raven Prince is an unexpected part of it, in ways that enrich their lives

The Wildness Within - (AU) The Raven Prince is a significant figure in this, as the one who takes on Gwyn as his apprentice in magic, learns how to become a softer person, and forces a higher Court status on Augus.

Spoils of the Spoiled - (AU) Only ever known as 'Mr Prince', the Raven Prince here is the master of the House of Ravens at Murdock College where Gwyn and Augus attend as students. A stern guide, and retired Olympic fencer.

Constellations - (AU) Mentioned only.

The Lone Wolf - (AU) Significant figure and master of Gwyn ap Nudd, and Unseelie King. Puts him in a difficult position, but still has love for this fae he adopted.

The King's Dog - (AU) Continuation of The Lone Wolf. Holds the Masque where he insists Gwyn attend and Augus be there.

The Nascent Diplomat - (AU) Continuation of The King's Dog. Unseelie King who finally learns the truth of Gwyn's past and fully steps into his role as Gwyn's father.

Underline the Blue - Cameo, and Nate Prince's uncle.

Underline the Silver - (upcoming) In which the Raven Prince (as Corbyn Prince - his human counterpart) will be a point-of-view character and omega opposite Augus Each Uisge, a peak alpha, in the Underline the Rainbow omegaverse.

A raven shifter.

Incredibly intelligent, known as the 'Wordsmith.' His dialogue is always quite precise and it's rare for him to fumble his words.

Black hair, black eyes, raven feathers in his hair.

Distinctive raven feather cloak and prefers wearing black shoes, black clothing, and a lot of silver chains with crystals that are charmed.

Age undetermined, but in the canon, over 10k years.

Unseelie King and the most beloved of the Unseelie Kings

A fae superstar even among the superstars

A fickle trickster who can sometimes be profoundly childish or profoundly mature, the most like the Gentry of all the fae we meet. He can be petty and cruel, but he has a soft heart deep, deep, deep down. Unfortunately it doesn't stop him from doing some truly horrendous things.

One of the strongest magic users in existence. Master Mage, trained at the School of the Staff.

Eats language.

Selfish but drawn to roles of service.

Lively curiosity.

Incredibly self deprecating followed by grandiose statements which are often just him dropping facts because he really is that powerful.

Strongly prefers his raven form, and feels 'clumsy' in human form, which goes some way to explaining why all his actions seem so precise in human form.

Finding Augus incredibly and bewitchingly attractive (and sometimes even falling in love with him), and constantly insulting Gwyn and Ash (but secretly quite liking Gwyn).

That's NOT how you deal with Ash's debt to Olphix, the Raven Prince! (The Ice Plague II)

Being known as the defeated King, and then finally finding out he was behind it all.

Giving Augus to the Nightingale to protect himself and the Kingdom

All his moments with Mosk on the Mantissa, especially on the crow's nest.

Always has black eyes and black hair

Excellent at fencing in every universe

A precise, educated manner of speaking, highly self-educated, comes from humble origins.

Trauma in his background that's often undisclosed for a long time.

Big reader, into languages, finds culture fascinating. Often a writer.

Educator.

Puts himself in roles where he is in service to others (King & educator being the most common)

Has body dysmorphia (when in human form in the fae realm, and the rest of the time just in general).

The Raven Prince was partially inspired by the character of Jareth as played by David Bowie in The Labyrinth.

He gave himself the name 'the Raven Prince' before he was ever royalty, and due to his ability to eat language, he at the memory of his true name out of his family's minds. As a result, he is the only one who knows his true name. (And no, it's not Corbyn, that's just the name I have for him when he's human which hilariously means 'Raven.')

A lot of people tend to assume the Raven Prince is a top in the bedroom, but he's naturally a bottom, and leans towards a degree of submission when the circumstances are safe. He's asexual, but curious about the sensations around sex.

The most divisive Fae Tales character I've ever written. The people who love him, love him. The people who hate him, hate him. I love him. He's probably in the top five characters I've ever written. Maybe even the top three.

Initially I built up his reputation and power by intentionally never having him in stories for years, and only ever having people refer to him with often a great sense of nostalgia (or in Augus' case, bitterness and regret). By the time he appeared in the canon, in the present, over half a decade had gone by, yet it felt like he'd been with us for a long time. But this was an intentional writing technique, and it's one of my favourites.

I no longer crave death. But I am only a bird, and I fear what comes next.

The Ice Plague II

[valtsv]

i don't know why i love characters who cause mass societal and/or ecological damage so much i'm just drawn to bitter stars who poisoned a third the earth's waters when they fell

[valtsv]

i just find it really compelling when someone lashes out with the kind of power that has devastatingly far-reaching consequences beyond the personal, whether intentionally or not, and then has to reckon with the fallout of that. like. you're still here. a lot of the people you hurt are still here. where do you go from that? what will you do now?

[waterlillypress]

This story is the reason I wanted to start book-binding as a hobby, and after a few years of just wanting and not doing and another few months of binding several books, I had enough practise to start these chunks. The story in question is Stuck on the puzzle by @not-poignant . I followed it chapter by chapter as it was written and it's been in my heart these last eight years since it was finished.

Both parts are around 500 pages and by far the largest I have bound.

As always big thanks to @renegadepublishing for being endlessly helpful.

In process pics behind the cut.

[not-poignant]

I'm sort of sitting here just staring in like a mixture of awe and gratitude and amazement and just... damn you're so cool for knowing how to do this, and I'm so lucky that Stuck on the Puzzle gets this kind of love <333333

[problemnyatic]

"I would kill for you. I would die for you" would you take a break for me? Would you sit down and rest? For a day, a week, a year? Would you let others take care of your needs for me? Would you let yourself be held for me? By me?

[willgrahamscock]

You ever read fanfic so god tier you have to wait for real life to load back in so you spend half the day doing tasks with that dead look in your eye, replaying all your favorite moments?

[proseverence]

Thinking about Cassandra and Cullen. Their friendship. How Cassandra knows Cullen—knows him for his achievements, his capabilities, his leadership—and doesn't question how that slots in with the insecurity churning just below the surface. The self-loathing he confides in her, the doubt he feels in himself—how she sees this, accepts it, and then compares him to a god. Finds beauty in his duality and dubs it holy.

She doesn't coddle him. Her love isn't soft and laced with empty platitudes. She sees Cullen's struggles—empathizes with them—and confronts them with a brutal concern that offends the lack of care Cullen shows himself. Her love is raw and sharp and packs a punch.

And I think it's what Cullen needs. I think it's that direct honesty that makes it harder for Cullen to dismiss her words when she says he's worth his weight in gold.

[proseverence]

I have no idea how im going to tag any of these posts yet. I know I'll include the book/fic name & the general themes in it, but is it too much to tag each chapter too??? tag the author as well???

[proseverence]

So completely obsessed with @evocating's take on Bruce's compartmentalization. How he presents himself as The Bat, as Bruce Wayne—tossing away his born identity for the shoddy facsimile that he could squeeze some use out of, for a persona to distance himself from the life he lives—and the unnamed, unplanned, person he is when he's wearing neither name. The last version of himself that he thinks of but the most authentic version of his options.

Of Bruce recognizing this, his disdain for the leftover parts of himself that didn't fit in neat little boxes, only to be opened when he had a role to fill, a use for them. The parts of himself that he can't escape. So fucking in love with it.