This Is Me

The thoughts of a Christian with a double lung transplant and a love for Doctor Who, Taylor Swift, Demi Lovato and so much more. Instagram is cassiet426

[midsummerknife]

my house of stone, your ivy grows

and now I’m covered in you

[proudswiftiesince07]

DUDE... IVY IS THE ONLY SONG ALL 3 OF THEM WORKED ON TOGETHER! And yes the set is very cardigan/willow... but... the house covered in ivy?! I can’t with her mind

[proudswiftiesince07]

Never forget that folklore is @taylorswift first Grammy for an album SHE OWNS.

[proudswiftiesince07]

My mom is getting tested for COVID-19 right now. It’s just to be safe.... but.... still.

[proudswiftiesince07]

Last time I posted anything Corona related, this was my moms uniform. She was able to wear her normal scrubs, just the eye gear added.... welll that’s different starting today.

She has to work 8-16 hour shifts like this. But on the plus side, due to how vigilant my moms boss has been about keeping the virus out of her assisted living building, there are, and have been, 0 cases in the facility. She’s been working such long shifts because they are short staffed and can’t hire right now. I feel so bad that she is exhausting herself. But so proud of her. Her attitude has not changed, she still shares funny moments from her shift. Doesn’t ask for anything. She is just a star. I’m so proud of her. And proud to be called her daughter.

On the flip side here’s me:

I had a double lung transplant 11 years ago. I receive Disability from the government to help pay my health and car bills. I was working 15 hours a week at Dunkin’ Donuts before the pandemic. Unfortunately I have been on lockdown since mid March because my doctors in Boston told me that it wasn’t safe. When my state was stay at home my boss didn’t have any issues with me not working. But that’s changed. With my state opening up, I had to tell her I either could work or be taken off payroll. Which would mean having to reapply when it’s safe. So I’m currently unemployed and unsure what’s going to happen. It’s not my choice. I have dreams.... but they aren’t things that I can have. I’m trying to focus on the positive... but it’s hard. Haven’t interacted with anyone but my parents who I live with. Haven’t seen my nieces, sister (who just moved), or my best friend. I honestly don’t know why I’m posting this. But I think I just needed to vent. So if you read this... thanks.

[proudswiftiesince07]

Hey swifties! Advice?

So I got a record player for Christmas, and I looooovvveee how “Lover” sounds. I want the rest of her discography on vinyl.... but feel conflicted... like is it ok to buy it? Sounds so weird, but I don’t know if it would hurt her or something.... ya know?

[proudswiftiesince07]

That moment when you realize you won’t be getting the much needed stimulus package from the government because your parents list you as a 28 year old dependent on tax forms.....so now it’s a scramble to pay things 😔

[proudswiftiesince07]

This is my mama. She is a Certified Nursing Assistant at a assisted living community on their memory care unit. In a nutshell, she takes care of people with Alzheimer’s and Dementia, things like that. She’s been doing this for over 20 years, since I was itty bitty.

Since the year 2000 I have been in and out of hospitals. I was diagnosed with a lung disease when I was 9 (2000). My mom was my buddy. She never left my side. When I was in hospital 4 hours away from home in NYC, when I was just in for a blood transfusion over the weekend, she never left me. We actually made it a fun time by bonding over card games, tv shows, food, all kinds of stuff. She is my best friend. In 2009, when I was 17, I got a lung transplant. This brings me to the reason of the post, kinda, sorta... well... we’ll see.

With this Coronavirus I am in a higher risk because of my immune suppression from the transplant. So. I’m self quarantined... in the house that I live in... which includes my parents. My mom is thankfully not working at a hospital, but she is still at risk. If her coworkers don’t stay home except for ACTUAL essentials, then they could pass the virus to residents or other workers. Every time she goes to work I worry. But I am grateful she is able to work. Her residents and their families cherish my mom because she has a special touch. I’ve seen her talk to someone about the same thing for 10 minutes, because of their memory, and she doesn’t lose it. She’s so patient. And just, anyone that knows her tells me how blessed I am to have her for my mom. And I know it.

So please remember people like her. And stay home so she comes home safe. My anxiety is really high. But my faith is stronger. So like my favorite singer @taylorswift says. My anxiety’s gonna make me worry but I’m just gonna “Shake it off” 🤣

❤️

[proudswiftiesince07]

Stress and anxiety

Well, my mom was sick this morning. She is a nurse at an assisted living facility (place where elderly go to live who need a little extra help) and because it has some Coronavirus symptoms she cannot work for 14 days. Needless to say my anxiety is shooting sky high. I’m needing some help. I need go to songs or movies that may have helped you. @taylorswift is preferred. I just need something to ease my mind. Trying everything I got, but just need other help cause I’m really nervous for a lot of reasons

[proudswiftiesince07]

Coronavirus, Anxiety, @taylorswift

Having a really bad day. I have had a horrendous migraine for a couple of days now. My anxiety is hitting me about finances. Because of my lung transplant I’m too high risk to work with the Coronavirus. Music helps. So I’m very grateful to @taylorswift for putting this playlist together. Hoping it helps... if not I’ll just throw on her music cause that always works 😉

[proudswiftiesince07]

So. Fun story. I get a call today. From a debt collector. I’m not working because of the Coronavirus. I had a double lung transplant and am at risk because I’m immunosuppressed. Money is a huge stressor for my anxiety. Anyone else worried about financial stuff at this time? Cause I’m hating that I’m gonna have to ask my folks for money

[proudswiftiesince07]

People need to SERIOUSLY STAY HOME. If you have to work, go. If you have to get groceries, go. But otherwise please STAY HOME. The more people interact the longer the virus lives. The less interaction the faster the virus dies out. I am not allowed to leave my house. I want to go out again. I want to shop. I want to work. But I can’t. And if people don’t seriously listen, then I and others like me won’t for a long time. So please. Help me. Help the other people who are on lockdown and can’t see family. I’m tired... and it’s just begun.

Now I’m off to make a @taylorswift playlist to lessen my anxiety

[proudswiftiesince07]

Couldn’t share through instagram, so here’s my link regarding Coronavirus. Thanks @taylorswift for talking which gave me the courage to 😊

https://instagram.com/p/B9xWHWqBYBp/

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Cassie (@cassiet426) on Mar 15, 2020 at 3:27pm PDT

[proudswiftiesince07]

So.... is nobody going to speak about the fact that Taylor wrote Eyes Open and The Lucky One.... and now we’re learning they both are more true than we could have imagined. Especially Eyes Open... the music industry man.... turns out the business side is mega toxic. Thanks for always speaking not just your truth but THE truth. Period.

[proudswiftiesince07]

Hey Taylor.. uh..

So how am I supposed to sleep after that?! That was so much more than I thought. I loved every second. When you came out to “The Man” in that shirt I pumped both fists in the air... and then... my heart stopped when I saw the piano. AMAZING performance. Thank you from this long time fan

@taylorswift

@taylornation

[proudswiftiesince07]

Hi @taylorswift

You probably won’t see this.... but if you do.... you should perform the man instead and dedicate to the men who inspired it 🤣 we love ya and will be here for anything..... sorry you had to spoil something for us and not get the joy that deserved. But I believe that everything will right itself with your army at your back

[proudswiftiesince07]

Taylor Swift Lover Fest East

My sister had a really tough year this year. She got divorced from her husband and has been giving her all (which she already was doing) to her 2 kids. But she really needs to remember that she is loved. I went to do the presale yesterday. But wasn’t able to get through at all. My sisters friend, who has been helping her, got tickets today and is giving one to her. Attached is our convo about it and the power of giving that can bring joy.

[proudswiftiesince07]

So I think that @taylorswift should do a music video for “The Man” where it is split screen so on one side you see her as herself, experiencing the things she’s singing about, and the other side where @taylorswift is a man and how he would be treated. ...does that make sense? I need to see a music video for this! @taylornation