obsessed with like, ideas @publicnotesapp - Tumblr Blog

Just realised ive chudded too close to the sun

#no icant enjoy the rest of the summer anymore auf wiederfuckingsiehen

Krw nebegaliu

After stone roses wrote i wanna be adored everybody couldve j wrapped it up w the music making bit and nothing wouldve changed in principle quality wise

#how is it so goodington…

Fuck it all this is all i want

#sick!!!!

publicnotesapp

I need a man or at least a wicked delusional phase for one right now or im jumping

publicnotesapp

LORD DID I STUTTER

8 yrs to go

Plssss let me die suddenly painlessly and now!!!!!!!!!!!

….sigh

Unlovable but not immobile

#fuck you all i will leave #love walking love moving

I truly hate my skin more than i explain more than i can put to words and i miss so sorely the days when laughing hurt my ribs and it hurt to stand up. I am paranoid of physical capability because i inherently lack mental capability to be anybody. Every piece of identity i cling to has escaped me and nobodys care in me moves me truly and its absence would be more comforting. If I hate myself i can not love anything around me and the only time i don’t nobody understands me and i can barely form a thought. I wish i was more patient to starve or more competent to either commit to it or not have to resort to it. I wish I loved somebody more than I love myself and I wish my existance was not inherently meant to conceal. I wish that my mom would cry for me again and Id be to exhausted to react or I wish a car would flung me across going at full speed instantly killing me or that I would go to sleep and never wake up. I would go beautiful then and keep the illusionary veil of potential which is disintegrating slowly each day now and after it does nobody will even bother their eyes to look at me alive. What I am most scared of. I got all that I wanted and I know that I am only greedy to want it for longer but I do not want to face

Joni mitchell darling what have you been through…