Puji

[pujiendangastuti]

My older sister just messaged on WA group about k-drama named #WhenLifeGivesYouTangerine. She was fussing about how green flag Gwansik is.

Point dr gwansik yg perlu adek2ku sayang pegang adalah:

1. Pria yg memperjuangkan wanitanya, dia yg mau, berjuang

2. Mengutamakan istri dan keluarga kecilnya, bukan ibu apalagi neneknya

3. Bertanggung jawab dan pekerja keras menafkahi keluarga (tetap berpenghasilan walau nggak berpenghasilan tetap)

4. Kalau ada konflik sama keluarganya (ibu dll), dia membela istri n anaknya

5. Mendukung mimpi istrinya dan anaknya

6. Bersama2 bertumbuh walau dengan keterbatasan

[pujiendangastuti]

Bisa jadi tegasin peran suami dan ayah seperti apa:

1. Pemimpin keluarga

2. Penyedia kebutuhan ekonomi

3. Pendukung emosional

4. Pendidik istri dan anak

5. Partner yang setara

6. Pelindung keluarga

7. Model dan teladan

Kalau tidak ada usaha melaksanakan itu ya lebih cocok disebut pendonor sperma

#lifeskillknowledge

[pujiendangastuti]

Kebanyakan terjadi, hal2 yg dijadikan alasan selingkuh.

Bagi laki-laki : inferioritas, merasa direndahkan, ego tinggi karena istri lebih dalam banyak hal.

Bagi perempuan : kurangnya afeksi, perhatian, apresiasi.

[pujiendangastuti]

Seperti keluarga kekaisaran ataupun kerajaan dimana pengasuh itu dipekerjakan dengan pertimbangan pendidikan dan privilege.

Kenapa kita tidak mengambil org berpendidikan sebagai pengasuh anak kita.

Kenapa tidak memberi kesempatan yg mengambil pendidikan usia dini untuk menjadi pengasuh dengan gaji layak, dan mengharapkan anak kita dididik oleh orang yang memiliki wawasan dan kemampuan.

[pujiendangastuti]

About praying

Discuss the place or room space at home, the room for wudhu, the clothes, surah to recite, pray for men is in the mosque, pray for women in the house, jamaah, recite dua quran, and murajaan short surah.

[pujiendangastuti]

I should consider some important topics before getting married:

- family background

- expectations and goals for marriage

- financial situation

- lifestyle and personal preferences

- beliefs and values

Common problems in marriage:

- infidelity

- sexual differences

- money problems

- childcare issues

- communication problems

[pujiendangastuti]

The topic I will ask and discuss to my future husband

[pujiendangastuti]

9 makna peran pemimpin

Konsep Qiwamah dalam Islam (An Nisaa: 34) sering dipersempit maknanya jadi sekedar "pemimpin". Lalu orang-orang dengan cepat menilai ayat in

[pujiendangastuti]

Sekarang, membicarakan cerita orang lain mengenai pikiran bunuh diri itu seperti cerita yang tidak mencengangkan lagi. Bahkan cerita dari keluarga pun bisa direspon dengan tenang dan santai sekali, padahal ceritanya begitu menyakitkan. Lagi-lagi ada saja orang yang lebih parah kondisinya dibanding diri ini.

Sakit rasanya membayangkan anak kelas 6 SD menjeratkan tali pada lehernya sendiri karena merasa tidak ada keluarga yang benar-benar menerima dan menyayangi. Bahkan ketika dewasa hampir merasakan pil pahit hampir diperkosa.

Aku yang lahir hanyalah beban hidup seseorang. Memberikan nestapa menyakitkan baik jiwa dan raga. Meningkatkan rasa sakit yang sudah ada pada dirinya dan sekarang pun masih sama.

Sudah tiga tahun ini aku berniat memajukan diri sendiri pun terambang ketidak jelasan karena rasa abai yang terus merenggut diri. Rendah motivasi, rendah ibadah, rendahlah diri ini.

Bahkan berdoa selalu dirasa enggan karena rasa kebutuhan akan Maha Kuasa yang semakin longsor terkikis ego diri.

Tolong aku, sepertinya aku perlu ditolong walaupun sepertinya tidak butuh-butuh amat...

Apakah aku perlu ditolong?

Tolong... (?)

[pujiendangastuti]

Masakan Mama

Restoran dengan konsep berasa di rumah dan ada mama yang menyiapkan makanan kita setelah pulang dari rutinitas. Perlu reservasi karena tiap 2 jam hanya boleh diisi 1 sampai 3 orang saja demi nuansa ekslusif benar2 berada di rumah. Peran mama itu menjadi chef, pelayan, dan teman bicara selama makan. Mama juga bisa role play menyesuaikan sosok ibu yang diidealkan customer. Customer datang pada waktu reservasi yang sudah dipesan, menekan bel rumah, disambut Mama yang sedang sibuk menyiapkan makanan, customer diajak mengobrol seperti perbincangan anak dan ibu, masakan yang sudah jadi disajikan, selama makan customer ditemani Mama sambil beraktivitas lain atau disesuaikan dengan permintaan customer. Pada saat reservasi, customer akan diminta mengisi form berisi konsep masakan mama akan seperti apa, apakah dia suka diajak ngobrol saat makan atau tidak, makanan apa yang disukai, dsb

[pujiendangastuti]

When I have my own children. In the first year to 7 years, I will educate them about discipline, morals, how to survive, how to live, and anything besides literate and math. I want to homeschool them and start informal education at 8 years or in middle school. It is because I want them to know more about the basic of life and manners. In those first 10 years also, I want to educate them about tauhid and akhlak and then aqidah (such as sholah, shaum, and other sunnah).

[pujiendangastuti]

One of some issues I wanna ask later is about silent treatment

[pujiendangastuti]

結婚のため、この質問を聞きたい

ー［一番の疲れている人、だれ？]のコミュニケーションは必要な相談

[pujiendangastuti]

Kazoku

I live with small family, there are my father, mother, second sister, and me. But once a year I will meet my mother's family in her hometown at Kediri and Munjungan, also I will visit Jogja my older sister's family especially my lovely niece to get in touch on holiday. I live together with my little family even though I want to live separately like before when I went to college. But I am glad, I did not do that. Living with my parents make our relationship get closer than before. But if you ask, who do I get on best within my family, I will say my older sister. I respect her so much, maybe it is because she is smart, good at public speaking, and the one that makes me want to have a big dream about continuing my study.

  Currently, I am happy with our family's situation. We are becoming closer than before, always talking about what we are concerned about, sometimes discuss about problems, and even sharing neighbor's stories. That makes me realize that I have already grown up. Generally, I do not think the Indonesian family such as a type of intimate family. What I know, we are friendly but not a type of close to our family. 

Different from western countries' families that always say "I love you" every day to each other. In my opinion, Asian families type such as cruel and cold. Before I got more intimate than before with my family, I always avoid them when they ask my days and my problems, if I answer their question, especially from my parents, one thing that surely I could get is their nags. The worst scenario I have to avoid is because I will cry after their nags. I will get hurt, even though they just want to give me the best thing they have, experiences, and want to give me some advice. But they will always compare me to someone else and bring up my mistakes to justify their nags. 

I ever wrote a caption on social media, asking is there anyone that hates to talk their problem to their parents because they do not want to get nags from them. And their responses are amazing, around 80 people liked my caption, and some people wrote they prefer to talk to therapist than their family. I am a little bit agree with their comment because I know what that means, but there is no perfect family in this world. If I am asked, which family is the best for me, I will answer my current family. I love to spend my time with my friends, but staying at home with family is the best thing I ever had.

[pujiendangastuti]

Ngerasa aneh agak kesinggung gk diundang atau dikasih tau temen sekolah dulu kalau mau nikah. Padahal sendirinya aja pengen gk ngadain resepsi nikahan. Calon aja belum punya udh punya fantasi tidak penting. Kenyataannya ajal lebih dekat dibanding jodoh.

Kalau dipikir-pikir pikiran Karin bener juga. "Kyknya gw gk nikah deh" . Soalnya impian belum tercapai dan gk ada calon juga jadi pikiran itu too related to be real.

[pujiendangastuti]

あ母さんになったら

一ヶ月に一回、本屋に行かなきゃ。子たちはどれの本、文具、など買ってもいい。本が好きな子供がほしいから。だから、未来の主人に相談しては行かないと、結婚するつもりだ。

[pujiendangastuti]

i am too coward and too blaming for anything about my weakness. about my sin. about my ego. even mental illness is not issue that i got but always be something in my mind. yes, i am just a coward and always thinking about suicidal thing that i really never want to make it happen. i am scared of God