Nothing But A Pain in the Heartache

Elle /// @sistermichael on AO3

[purelyapocryphal]

Fic and Vid Masterlist

Vids

Our Flag Means Death

Take On Me (tumblr and YouTube) : General OFMD, emphasis on relationships but also flashy clips of the ships because why not

Fic

What We Do in the Shadows

The One Where the Crew Has a Betting Pool (series, rated M/E; 59k; Guillermo/Nandor, Guillermo/Camera Two, Camera Two/Nandor (just roll with it)): the camera crew’s betting pool over whether Nandor and Guillermo will finally get it on gets rather out of hand. Featuring excessive bagel consumption, questionable metaphysics, and an oddly-perceptive North Jersey merman. Camera Two POV, covers Season 2 through the summer afterwards.

To Ease This Precious Ache (rated E; 2.3k; Guillermo/Nandor): Shortly after Théâtre des Vampires, Guillermo shows up on Nandor's doorstep with a seemingly-straightforward request. Things escalate rather quickly. Featuring homoerotic swordplay and Melissa Etheridge.

A Case of You (rated E; 4.2k; Guillermo/Nandor): Nandor knows you shouldn’t drink alone. Guillermo obliges. (Commensal politics throughout Guillermo’s tenure as a familiar, including four-dollar Cab Sav, eleven years of half-truths, and what exactly happens when a vampire bites you.)

Of Recklessness and Water (rated E; 8.6k; Guillermo/Nandor) Nandor stumbles across La Llorona and decides that it’s Guillermo’s problem. Unfortunately, he’s right. (Also known as "Cryptid Encounters of the Emotionally-Constipated Kind.")

Henges (rated T; 2.3k; Guillermo/Nandor). Guillermo is a New Yorker. Featuring Manhattanhenge, druids, and that classic New York garbage smell.

Six Ways 'Til Chelsea (rated M; 3.7k; Guillermo/Laszlo). When Guillermo returns to the Vampiric Council Library of Antiquities after his disastrous outing with the Cloak of Duplication, Laszlo tries to cheer him up. Via custom-curated antique pornography, of course.

Be Sure to Wear Some Flowers in Your Hair (rated M; WIP; Guillermo/Nandor; Nadja/Laszlo; the Baron/the Sire). San Francisco, 1967. It’s the Summer of Love and between the hippies, the Vietnam draft, and whatever the hell is going wrong with the sourdough, Guillermo de la Cruz is burning through a LOT of saint candles. The last thing he needs is a tall, handsome, and very weird hippie showing up to place a certain cake order…

Rivers of London

For Sentimental Reasons (rated M; 11.7k; Nightingale/David Mellenby, Nightingale/Seawoll, Nightingale/Peter (dude gets around, okay?)): Nightingale’s relationship with his body across the decades, particularly with regards to a certain Peter Grant.

The Isle is Full of Noises (rated M; 23.4k; Nightingale/Peter): The Folly's finest are called to North Wales to investigate sea monster sightings. Casefic.

The Room Where it Happens (rated G; 1k; gen): The Nightingale brushes up on his geopolitics.

Friends of Dorothy (rated T; 25k; Nightingale/Peter): If your posh, repressed governor starts reading you The Wizard of Oz while you’re trying to get over Skygarden, is he flirting with you, wrangling his own demons, or both? Only time will tell.

One for Sorrow, Two for Joy (rated G; 0.6k; Nightingale/Peter pre-relationship): Peter and Nightingale have the long-overdue Bird Talk.

Derry Girls

Better the Devil You Know (rated T; 4k; Sister Michael/Janet Taylor): Limavady Retreat Centre, summer 1995. Friends Across the Barricade fosters goodwill in unexpected quarters.

Ghosts (BBC)

Ghost Stories (rated M; 80k; Ensemble; The Captain/Pat Butcher, Mike/Alison Cooper): Button House, Surrey. An ex-Army captain with a mysterious past moves into a flat in a once-grand estate. His new neighbours certainly seem determined to keep life interesting… (An AU-ish where the house has been divided into flats and things get a bit metaphysical. Oh, and there’s Twister with Feelings).

Memoranda of Understanding (rated M; 2.3k; the Captain/Lieutenant Havers): Lieutenant Havers and the Captain write memos concerning Button House's latest innovations in invisible ink. The fact that the source of the ink is somewhat delicate is irrelevant. Mostly. (It's not crack if you cite your sources, right?)

Land to Light On (rated M; 69k; the Captain/Lieutenant Havers): Academia AU. At an academic conference about the role of ghosts in European society, the Captain gets more than he bargained for. Having to share a bed with a certain Dr Havers isn't even the half of it.

[chirasul]

we got a full redbox and now we're playing go fish with the redbox movies

[chirasul]

I would never pay money for a redbox. if you ask politely and are very very persistent (i.e. annoying) they will let you take it away

here's my dad and i taking it away

a redbox makes a wonderful addition to your patio

[fishmech]

for those wondering why they're free to take now, it's because the company that made those "chicken soup for the soul" books bought them a few years ago and then completely collapsed so bad they couldn't afford to dispose of or even take the blu rays and dvds out of their kiosks all over.

so any of them is free game because they're all located on other business' property and they usually don't want to have to pay to get rid of them either. so asking the store manager usually gets you the ok to pull it out and keep it.

[chirasul]

there was a period of time right after their bankruptcy where you could put in any debit or credit card and it would spit out movies without charging you. you could even put in like an expired or deactivated card, or a visa gift card with a $0 balance, didnt matter, they'd just start spitting discs out. a lotta people raided redboxes for movies for a couple months, with some people doing what me and my brother and my dad did here, taking the whole box and signs and marquees as well. because managers sure as hell don't want a big abandoned piece of trash on their sidewalk disappointing customers. BUT they're also often too cheap to pay someone to remove it. so they just sit there.

luckily there are no shortage of freaks like us who will just take them away on our own volition. we did it all "by the book", too: we set up cones and caution tape, disconnected electricity properly, used an angle grinder to grind down the bolts in the concrete so nobody would trip on them, then cleaned everything up afterward and sealed off the electrical panel so the store would know everything is safe and tidy. though they were hesitant when we were first contacting them, they were honestly very relieved and grateful when we finally took it away, especially once they saw that we "knew what we were doing" (we don't) and look like we've "done this before" (we haven't).

the fun part: the reason why this redbox, in particular, was completely full and unraided is because the computer hardware inside had failed some months before the bankruptcy, and a failing company sure as hell wasn't gonna send a tech out to our podunk dipshit city to fix it, so it was impossible to rent movies or take any discs out. plus, for who knows how long, people were returning old redbox discs to this machine and not taking any out, leading to a much higher variety of movies than your average redbox.

there is a thriving community of redbox hackers and modders out there, as well, creating open-source software for repurposing the machines and not letting their very interesting and robust disc-management hardware go to waste. this one belongs to my brother (who was very annoying persistent and did all the legwork of contacting managers and securing permission) who is a programmer by trade and will be hacking it into a family-access movie library, with whatever discs we want. i mean the machine is completely weatherproof and has a built-in AC unit, it would be such a waste to not try to turn it into something cool.

if we get another one, i'm gonna try to mod it into some sort of art or zine vending machine. the disc boxes are just the right size for small print art or stickers. would make a great "little free library" too.

remember: the rules are made up. act like you belong there and you can get away with anything. this applies to your own life

[thememedaddy]

[desolationlesbian]

my cat is completely obsessed with watching the bathroom sink drain and I have started calling this "her shows." as in when I'm in the bathroom and she meows and runs up I'll be like "oh you want to watch your shows?" and run the faucet for an extra few seconds so it fills a little. she will then sit there at the edge of the sink for ages totally entraptured by the drain. blorbo from her sink

[desolationlesbian]

her shows

[ketchuplaser]

[voidpaws]

ok anyways. post this beast

[foxonrollerskates]

I HAVE THE OTHER PART TO THIS PHOTO

[purelyapocryphal]

Hi! I saw you mentioned a photo of Peter Sandys-Clark where he's shirtless and holding an axe, in a comment of your fic Land to Light On. Would you happen to still have that photo? Would you please send it to me if you do? I know that comment was made 3 years ago so it's completely fine if you don't. Anyways, thank you so much for that amazing fic and potentially the photo!

thank you so much!!!!

I swear to God that photo is out there somewhere on a hard drive/in the wilds on the internet... but I can't find it for the life of me.

Anyone out there able to help out?

[purelyapocryphal]

Huzzah! thank you, kind internet people

[purelyapocryphal]

Hi! I saw you mentioned a photo of Peter Sandys-Clark where he's shirtless and holding an axe, in a comment of your fic Land to Light On. Would you happen to still have that photo? Would you please send it to me if you do? I know that comment was made 3 years ago so it's completely fine if you don't. Anyways, thank you so much for that amazing fic and potentially the photo!

thank you so much!!!!

I swear to God that photo is out there somewhere on a hard drive/in the wilds on the internet... but I can't find it for the life of me.

Anyone out there able to help out?

[saturniandragon]

23 years old and I just made the connection that people on the northern hemisphere have a different view of the moon than people on the southern hemisphere.

[saturniandragon]

[bomberqueen17]

I was a whole like, 40ish years old when I went to the equatorial region for the first time. My North American ass went to Colombia and first off, could not fuckin handle the fact that while it felt like summer (80-90F, humid), the sun went down on the dot of 6pm every night and rose at 6am every morning. There I was at 7pm fully beliving it was midnight, because it was both dark and hot. Like, I'm used to early dark! but it's cold when it's dark early! I could NOT handle it.

And then, there in the dark, pitch-midnight-summer-black at 7pm, up pops this lovely crescent moon and it is

fucking SIDEWAYS

i had NEVER EVER EVER realized, despite knowing my whole life that the moon is a spherical object rotating around Earth, also a spherical object, that it would be at different angles from different spots on Earth.

It's the MOON! How can it be DIFFERENT! My poor patient partner drew me a diagram and I was like listen I know all of that but I cannot actually handle it. Nobody warned me the moon looks different.

So yeah my feeble mind was BLOWN, all y'all world travelers/residents can laugh at me now. Knowing it is one thing, experiencing it is something else, and I did NOT see it coming.

[jackironsides]

I remember being in the pagan scene in my twenties and being faintly annoyed by the omnipresent triple moon symbol: )O(

... because I'm from the southern hemisphere and it Doesn't Look Like That here. And (O) does not look anywhere near as cool.

[babushkaat]

let’s hang on mama (of another species)

[allsadnshit]

"Growing Around Grief"

Lois Tonkin, 1996

[eternal--return]

This is the most important thing I’ve learned about grieving. It never goes away. Time doesn’t make it smaller. Time, if you do the work, makes you bigger. Self expansion is key. Self expansion through creativity and passion and communication. My grief used to be all of me. Now it is a part of me. An important part, but just a part. I love this visualization so much.

[only-cat-memes]

[dingdongyouarewrong]

old enough to remember when smut was called ‘lemons’ but young enough that i had absolutely no business knowing that smut was called ‘lemons’ at the time 

[lakemojave]

Yes yes I know this too shall pass but christ alive man it's passing like a gotdamn kidney stone

[miseducatedmelanicmuse]

Like a new friend!

[mumblesplash]

do NOT sort by kudos the real play is to find the most prolific writers in the hockey rpf tag and go to their profile to see if they’ve written a single bizarrely high-quality fic for the fandom you’re actually looking for

[homunculus-argument]

If you're having a private phone conversation with the phone off your ear, no headphones, and the speaker on in public, that's a public conversation now. That's an open invite, and I'm going to chime in if I have an opinion. This is now OUR disagreement about your boyfriend's spending habits.