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How to Eat Life LN Chapter 1-2 Translation (2/2)

1-2 Imaginary Borderline (Part 2 of 2.)

Read Part 1 of this chapter before continuing this part!

When Tobi went to school on little to no sleep, a teacher wearing glasses with black frames eyed him in front of the gate. This person always wore a suit that fit him as if it was tailor-made. He really didn’t want the neat black-glasses man to call out to him this morning, so he decided to make the first move and dropped his head in a small bow.

“Good morning, Sensei.”

“…Um, right. Good morning.” The black glasses-wearing teacher looked noticeably daunted. Ever since freshman year, this man had bothered Tobi almost every morning, but then he receives a simple greeting and suddenly nothing happens. Just saying ‘good morning.’ Was this enough all along?

“Where did the wind blow from?”* Baku asked as Tobi was changing his shoes by the lockers. 

*It is a common Japanese phrase used when something unexpected happens

“I dunno. I guess there’s no wind at all.”

“You’re having a change of heart? That is what caused it, isn’t it?”

“You’re making things up…” His slippers felt a little tight. Did his feet grow? When you’re going through a growth spurt, clothes stop fitting you, but having to buy new ones would hurt his finances a lot.

When he started walking towards the classroom, feeling slightly gloomier than before,  a girl with long hair suddenly appeared from behind the lockers. Tobi stepped back on instinct.

“…Shi-Shiratama-san.”

“Good morning, Otogiri-kun.” Those eyes again. Shiratama was staring directly at Tobi.

“…Wh, what?” Tobi covered the lower part of his face with his arm and looked at the floor. “You want something? It’s still really early…”

“Actually, I was waiting here for you.”

“Huh? …W, why?”

“I told you yesterday, did I not?”

“Oh…”

“I would like to hear your answer.”

“A—”

“A?”

“About…”

The phrase “eyes flashing white and black”* popped into Tobi’s head. He had seen it in a dictionary some time ago. The situation he’d found himself in then wasn’t one to make his pupils switch colors, rather, it made his eyeballs spin violently in their sockets. Tobi’s eyes kept moving restlessly. It was making him feel sick. Many of their classmates were coming to the lockers and whispering amongst themselves while changing shoes. They’re probably starting to suspect there’s something between him and Shiratama. They’re wondering “What’s going on? What are the two of them doing?” without a doubt. In all honesty, despite being one of the people in question, Tobi himself didn’t know the answer. 

*A Japanese phrase meaning being astonished, surprised, or shocked

“Hi,” If that wasn’t enough, a passing janitor just had to approach them and further amplify this predicament, turning it from complicated to chaotic.

“Good morning, Otogiri-kun. What are you doing here, Shiratama-san?” 

“Haizaki-san.” Shiratama turned around, and when she recognized who was speaking to them, she bowed politely. “Good morning to you too. Thank you for your work even at these early hours.”

“It’s nothing.” Haizaki beamed brightly. He was carrying cardboard boxes. Tobi couldn’t see what was inside, but whatever it might be, he didn’t give a damn.

It seemed to be different in Shiratama’s case, though.

“They look heavy. Shall I assist you?”

“No, no, no, there’s no need!” Haizaki shook his head vigorously. His almond-shaped eyes became almost perfectly round. “Don’t trouble yourself. It is a part of my job, after all. I come to this school to work, and you come here to get your education.”

“I may not look like it, but I am pretty strong.”

Shiratama raised her right arm and flexed it. A thin arm. Very, very thin. Was there really any strength in it? Tobi sincerely doubted so, but he felt they weren’t quite on the same page. It wouldn’t matter even if, hypothetically, she had some sort of superhuman strength. Haizaki was carrying the boxes as part of his duties. A middle schooler like Shiratama wasn’t obligated to help him with it. That’s what he was trying to tell her. Even Tobi, who Baku calls antisocial, understood that much.

Shiratama Ryuuko might bring him trouble.

Tobi realized that last night.

An ordinary middle schooler wouldn’t go about asking classmates of the Otogiri Tobi sort to be their friend.

Tobi was aware of the fact that he’s not the type of person others can feel close to. He’s not happy. He’s not nice. Not even funny. His past was difficult to explain. He also carries around Baku, with whom only he can talk.

And despite all that, it seemed that there were things he notices that other people don’t.

What would Tobi think if there was someone else that’s just like him?

He would probably consider them a freak.

That’s likely what everyone sees Otogiri Tobi as — a freak.

Shiratama Ryuuko’s probably not much better if she wants to befriend this kind of person.

He wants to run. Get out of there as quickly as possible. Shiratama is talking with Haizaki. That’s his chance! He’s going to run while he still can!

Tobi tried to get away from them. Unfortunately, even though he made sure to tread especially lightly, he was noticed.

“No,” Shiratama grabbed his right arm dangerously close to his wrist. “Don’t go, Otogiri-kun. At least give me an answer.”

“Oh no,” Haizaki had a perplexed expression, as if he was feeling guilty. “Did I interrupt you by any chance? I’m sorry. Forgive me. I should be kicked by a horse, or however that goes…”

What would a horse be doing here? He’s read that in a book before. There was a saying that went somewhat along those lines.

‘Those who interfere with other people’s love lives should be eaten by dogs.’

The dogs can also be replaced with kicking horses.

Haizaki seems to be misunderstanding something here. It would be best to correct him. Eh, it doesn’t matter anyway. It’s not the time for that. Shiratama was still holding Tobi’s arm.

Will you let go already?

Tobi tried to express it with his eyes.

It’s not getting through. Shiratama just tilted her head curiously. He should be the one feeling curious.

Nothing to do about it now. Careful not to put too much strength into it, Tobi shook off Shiratama’s hand.

“So… About that, um, I’ll tell you when we’re walking, or something…” When Tobi timidly made this offer, Shiratama nodded. Should I start running at full speed? That idea came into his head, but he chose to ignore it. Shiratama was walking along on his left.

“I would like to hear your reply.”

“…Already? Isn’t it too early?”

“Are you still considering it?”

“Well… Considering, and, um…”

“He’s the indecisive type,” Baku said with a sigh.

“Does he have a hard time making decisions?” Shiratama asked.

“It’s more like he’s not used to expressing his thoughts or feelings with words. Never has been. Doesn’t talk to people.”

“What about you?”

“I’m different. And even so, he still tells me to ‘figure it out’ or ‘guess’ and stuff!”

“He expects you to understand him?”

“Something like that.”

“……Hey,” Tobi was knocking on his forehead with his fist. It started to hurt. “Can’t you talk normally? To others, it sounds like Shiratama-san is just murmuring to herself…”

“I apologize, I was careless,” Shiratama lowered her head a bit. “But would they not think that I am talking to you, Otogiri-kun? Or that I am trying to get your attention?”

“That’s just plain weird in itself…”

“Then talk back to me, please. Everything will be sorted this way.”

“……I’m talking to you right now.”

“So using this occasion, what is your answer?”

“I’m telling you I don’t know yet…” Tobi realized he was slouching. He couldn’t help but think he was attracting attention from the students passing by them in the corridor. “Besides…” Wait, they’re definitely staring at him. It’s because of Shiratama, clear as day. “Why?”

Shiratama’s eyes flashed when he asked that.

“Could you elaborate?”

“…Why do you want to be my friend? What’s the reason? Your motive?”

“It is because you are you.”

“Huh? What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Do you need me to explain?”

“If possible. If you can tell me in a way I’ll be able to understand…”

“To understand.” Shiratama nodded in agreement, and after thinking for a short moment with her eyebrows furrowed, she stopped walking.

In the middle of a staircase.

Tobi climbed one step farther than her and halted there.

Shiratama was looking at Tobi. She captured him in her gaze and wouldn’t let go.

“May I have some of your time? Preferably during today’s lunch break. This is a matter we will need to discuss in a place where people scarcely come.”

Those eyes were Tobi’s weakness. They’re impossible to ignore. He can’t look away from them.

“…Fine. Whatever.”

That was the only reply he could give. What else was there to do?

Right after lunchtime ended, the special classroom wing was empty. Tobi arranged to meet Shiratama on its outside emergency staircase.

He was waiting at the landing between the second and third floor, leaning against the railing when Shiratama opened the door and started climbing up the stairs.

Tobi had a strange inkling. It was because she was carrying a bag on her shoulder. Not the kind that’s normally used for school purposes. This one is small. Pretty sure they’re called pochettes.

“Hello.” Shiratama went up to the landing and gave a polite greeting.

“Yeah…” Tobi nodded back vaguely. Shiratama is so well mannered it takes him aback every time. “So… what is it? That motive? The reason why you asked to be my friend.”

“You know what they say, it is more suitable to present a proof rather than a theory.”

“…I guess. There was something like that.”

“With that being said, we came here together.”

“Together…?” Tobi frowned. From what he could see, Shiratama came alone. Didn’t bring anyone with her. She raised her pochette and opened it.

“Come out, Chinurasha.”

Did Shiratama just call out to someone while looking at the bag? If so, then she was presenting some eccentric behavior, to say the least. Tobi had always considered her to be quite the character, but not to this extent. He even started to worry about her. Was she alright? That question went for more than just this situation. Maybe there was a small pet, some sort of a rodent, hiding inside of the pochette? That would mean an entirely different issue with irrationality. You’re not allowed to bring animals to school. Even Tobi’s aware of that, and yet, it looks like that’s exactly what’s going on.

Something crawled out of the pouch

“Mmm…” Baku let out a small moan.

See?

It’s a tiny pet.

The little guy must’ve felt very cramped sitting inside that bag. Considering its size, it must have had to really squeeze in there to even just barely fit. Although, it looked like there was more fluff to it than most actual living creatures, so it was likely able to get into spaces much smaller than one might assume at first glance.

Is it a cat? A kitten? Probably not. Even saying ‘probably’ is a mistake in itself.

This creature has horns. It’s obvious that cats don’t have horns.

A small animal with two horns on its head—

Does something like that exist?

He hadn’t seen it in the animal atlas at the facility. The facility had also organized many field trips to the local zoo, and Tobi couldn’t remember seeing anything this size that grew horns during any of those. On the other hand, there might actually be a species like this living somewhere in this vast world that Tobi just doesn’t know about. Maybe it’s a horned animal’s young?

The creature left the pochette and started climbing up Shiratama’s body. It wasn’t particularly nimble but didn’t pause once on its way. It must do this regularly. When it reached Shiratama’s right shoulder, it turned its head towards Tobi.

It’s hard to tell if it has eyes or not. They might be buried under all that fur.

In spite of that, Tobi could feel its gaze upon him.

“Chinu, say your greetings.” The creature moved its head at Shiratama’s command, making a gesture resembling lowering it diagonally. Then, a teeny tiny mouth showed from within the fluffy fur.

Yuu—

Uyuu—

Kchuu—

That was what Tobi could hear coming out of it. Is this how this thing cries?

“……Hi.” Tobi bowed out of habit.

Shiratama scratched Chinu— or Chinurasha, whichever one it is— under its chin with her pointer finger.

“Good job.”

“Oi, Tobi—” Baku whispered, “Don’t tell me you didn’t notice.”

“…Notice what?”

“This thing isn’t normal!”

“Well, it’s a… unique creature. Has horns and all.”

“That’s not what I mean!” Baku seemed quite irritated. Save for the fact that he can speak with Tobi, he’s nothing short of a regular big backpack. However, he can open himself at will when mad. It’s different from a zipper getting loose. Tobi is the only one who can see it, but it’s as if a part of his zipper opens just like a mouth does.

It’s doing it right now.

“Are you STUPID, Tobi?! Dumb as a doorknob, for goodness’ sake!” Baku’s speaking, flapping his mouth. He’s shaken rather than irritated.

“I am,” Shiratama drew her shoulders back and touched cheeks with Chinu. “the only one who can see Chinu.”

“……But—”

He can see it.

Tobi can see it clearly.

It seemed that Chinu had a soft spot for Shiratama. In response to her action, it rubbed its face against her cheek and closed its eyes in delight. It let out low-pitched cries, though they sounded more like noises it wanted to hold in but couldn’t than its actual voice. Its horns dig into Shiratama’s skin, but it doesn’t look painful. At least, she isn’t feeling any pain. They must not be hard enough to pierce through.

“It’s the same as me!” Baku spat out, almost like he didn’t want to. Could he not stand it anymore? “Up until now, you were the only one who could hear me. And only Shiratama Ryuuko could see Chinurasha, or whatever its name was. It’s not exactly the same, but really FREAKIN’ close!”

“…So, Shiratama-san can hear you, and I can see Chinu.”

“That’s it.”

“Huh?” Tobi’s shoulders dropped. He knocked his fist on his forehead. “…Then what— what does it mean? H-how did it… happen…?”

“Frankly, I am also clueless.” Shiratama said nonchalantly. “I noticed you were talking with Baku-chan a while ago because I could hear his voice. It appeared that I was the only one. Only you and I can hear him, Otogiri-kun. I thought it had to have a special meaning.”

“……Special—” Tobi shook his head, barely putting in any strength. “It could be some kind of a disorder…”

“Do we have mental problems?”

“Well… It’s more likely than thinking that only the two of us are sane…”

“Oh right, Shiratama Ryuuko!” This time, Baku threw in a proper reluctant interruption, “Quit adding chan to my name!

Shiratama’s expression was puzzled.

“Baku-chan?”

“THAT! It makes me all itchy. Can’t really find the words. It’s disgusting!”

“I apologize.” Shiratama shrugged and lowered her head in a gesture that was all but apologetic. Chinu mimicked her.

That’s adorable.

Tobi startled himself by having that thought.

For the record, he only thought that Chinu was ‘adorable.’ That it and Shiratama did the same thing at the same time, yes.

“How about Baku-san?” When Shiratama asked this, Baku cleared his throat.

“That ain’t really feelin’ right either. Why not just drop honorifics altogether?”

“You’re putting on airs…” Tobi wanted to fling Baku to the ground. Baku got back at him immediately.

“I’m not putting on anything! Just sayin’ she can be casual with me! I’m being humble! Isn’t that right, Shiratama Ryuuko?”

Shiratama nodded. Chinu followed through.

“I will start calling you ‘Baku’ from now on.”

“Sure. That’s great. I’m real bad with all that ‘formal’ stuff anyway.”

“I have no issues with you calling me by my first name either.”

“That’s a given! Something like ‘Oryuu’* could also be nice. Yeah, not bad at all. Whaddya think?” 

*Baku makes up a pet name by adding a hiragana character for “O” before the first and taking away the last syllable of the name.

“I do not dislike it, so you can call me whatever you wish.”

“Then I’m settling on ‘Oryuu’! Oryuu.”

“Yes.”

“……You’ve started to get along really fast.” Maybe Tobi should throw Baku towards Shiratama instead of smacking him to the ground.

“Ou? What’s thaaat? Are you jealous, Tobiii?” Baku giggled, “Worry not! Our relationship won’t change just because Oryuu’s here now.”

“The one where you’re… stuck with me?”

“Don’t call it that!”

“So what kind of relationship is it?”

“If you force words into it it’ll lose all its magic! But if you have to, then probably partners?”

“Chinurasha and I are also like partners,” Shiratama smiled brightly and turned to Chinu, adding ‘Right?’ as she did it. “It cannot speak like you, Baku, but it is always by my side. We have been together as long as I can remember.”

“…I want to ask something. What would you have done if I couldn’t see Chinu?”

“If that had happened, I would have—” Shiratama made all sorts of grimaces with her lips and puffed out her cheeks. “I would have been put in a difficult situation, to say the least. A pitiful middle school girl who claims to be seeing an invisible little creature, furthermore, behaves as if it were there with her…”

“It’s good that I can see Chinu then…”

“Honestly, I took a risk. Although I was quite convinced already that you could see them too, Otogiri-kun.”

“So you can say the results were alright?” Baku asked that incredibly lightly, but if Tobi were in Shiratama’s place, he wouldn’t have taken that risk.

Is there something wrong with me?

Tobi has had those thoughts a number of times. However you look at it, being able to talk with your backpack isn’t normal.

He can hear sounds other people can’t.

He can see things he’s not supposed to see.

Are those illusions? Is there something wrong with his brain? Is it some kind of mental illness? Maybe he should go see a doctor about it. He’s considered all of those options.

Tobi was so exhausted he might just fall off the railing. What had tired him out so much? One thing came to mind.

He’s not the only one. It’s relief he’s feeling. Those weren’t just products of his imagination.

Baku is there.

He’s not an illusion Tobi created.

He actually exists.

“…You can hear Baku just as I can, and I can see Chinu, just like you do. The things that other people can’t see…”

If that’s the case, maybe those ones as well?

Tobi decided to ask Shiratama.

“Does it mean you can see them too, Shiratama-san? Those… weird creatures other students bring here sometimes…”

Shiratama looked Tobi in the eye so that their gazes met.

After that, she nodded slowly.

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How to Eat Life LN Chapter 1-2 Translation (1/2)

1-2 Imaginary Borderline (Part 1 of 2.)

Tobi was laying on his back on the bed in his room, staring at the pages of a pocket-size edition book. The title was “Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?”*, a translation of a science fiction novel from America or some other place.

* ”Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep” is a science–fiction novel by Phillip K. Dick published in 1968.

In the facility, there were three steel racks filled with books donated by past inhabitants who had already moved out. The people living there now could read them to their heart’s content. All of the books that middle schoolers would be interested in were being read by someone else, so Tobi was using this barely-touched novel to kill some time.

He sort of just wanted to read something.  If there were words he didn’t know, he could just look them up in a dictionary. Thanks to this practice, he was able to memorize kanji well, but for some reason the contents of the books he’s read simply don’t want to stay in his head. Shortly after he’s done with them, he forgets almost everything.

Tobi glanced at his watch. 9:56 PM. The middle schoolers in the facility had to switch their lights off at 10 PM, so he had four minutes left.

For a good reason, like wanting to study, this time could be extended. Most of the others use this daily, but Tobi doesn’t.

“Shouldn’t you be going nighty-night, Tobi?” Baku laughed from the floor.

“What’s with the ‘nighty-night’? I’m not a little kid, you know.”  Tobi put the book on the edge of his bed. This room was originally intended for two people, so there are two beds, but Tobi lives here alone.

He never asked for his own room, and he used to share. His roommate at the time couldn’t stand him, though, so he filed a complaint against him to one of the workers that living with Otogiri Tobi was unbearable.

“How I see it, a middle schooler in his second year is right in the middle of being a kid.”

Tobi took his leg off the bed and pressed his foot lightly on Baku.

“Hey! That hurt, you BRAT!”

“You’re younger than me, aren’t you? That makes you even more of a child.”

“I’m an exception! You could say I’m a special case. Quite particular. Or rather extraordinary. Hey, stop it, Tobi! Don’t step on me or I’ll get all creased! I’m telling you!”

Tobi had enough of decorating Baku with his footprints after a short while, so he dropped it. He turned off the lights and went to bed.

The high schoolers’ lights-out time was at 11 PM, and some people would stay up late into the night saying they were doing their homework or studying. The nights at the facility were anything but calm.

Tobi wrapped himself in his blanket and rolled over to the side.

“You’re thinking about that woman, Tobi?”

“Not at all.” Tobi wanted to click his tongue. “If you didn’t mention her now, it wouldn’t have even crossed my mind.”

“Oh, really? I don’t believe you.”

“Really.” The words came out on their own. They were not prompted by that girl being on his mind. “……I’m serious.” Baku cracked up at Tobi trying to correct himself.

“She’s a real strange woman, huh.”

“Don’t say ‘woman.’”

“But she is.”

“Even so…”

“I know you were thinking about her. A big thing happened, after all. Can’t blame ya for getting curious.”

“I don’t really care.”

“Quit lying to yourself. Besides, even if you’re not interested, she on the other hand –“

“I’m going to sleep. Won’t you be quiet now?”

“Fine, I get it. Hope you don’t have a sleepless night.”

Tobi closed his eyes and pretended to snore, and Baku giggled again. That was none of his business. Tobi wasn’t the type to have problems falling asleep. He usually blacked out almost immediately. He was not thinking about that girl. He didn’t want to be, but she still ended up in his head.

“Speaking earnestly, there is something I wish to ask of you using this opportunity, Otogiri-kun.” After she had started talking to him that day, Shiratama Ryuuko raised her chin slightly, and spoke in an unusually formal manner, “Would you like to spend some time with me on friendly terms?”

“……Huh?”

The first thing Tobi did was try to understand what exactly he was being asked. Was it even a question in the first place? It didn’t feel like one. In any case, Shiratama was expecting an answer. That much was clear. But what was the right thing to say?

Unable to figure it out, Tobi just repeatedly voiced mindless “ehh—‘s”, “aaa—‘s” and “umm—‘s”.

“Oh,” Shiratama brought her right hand up to her mouth. “It is a sudden request, so I apologize if I have troubled you. You do not have to answer me immediately.” 

“Ah… is that… so.”

“Or soon, of course.”

“Well — I’m not sure…”

“Would you want more time to consider?”

“……Maybe?”

“Understood.” Shiratama closed her eyes and slowly let out a breath. “I am glad I said it. I was really nervous.”

Tobi’s heart was racing as well. Somehow, it didn’t feel like he was being teased.

“See you tomorrow then, Otogiri-kun.” As if feeling relieved after getting what she had to say off her chest, Shiratama bowed goodbye and left as quickly as a bird flying off a branch.

What’s with this girl? As soon as that thought came to Tobi, Baku murmured:

“What the hell was that about…?”

In the end, Tobi slept poorly that night.

Of course, it was all Shiratama Ryuuko’s fault.

She had approached him all of a sudden and started saying odd things before he even had time to register what was going on.

“Would you like to spend some time with me on friendly terms?”

Being surprised like that left Tobi perplexed. Otherwise, he would’ve given a proper answer right there and then. He thought so, at least. For example, if you were suddenly asked to dance by a complete stranger, the answer you would give them would most definitely be “no.” You would refuse to.

He should’ve refused. 

He should’ve said he didn’t want to.

Tobi hadn’t rejected her on the spot because he was confused.

Not only that, but there was also Shiratama’s unorthodox speaking pattern.

“On friendly terms.”  There’s nothing wrong with that part, it’s about the other one.

“Would you like to spend some time with me?”

Wasn’t there something weird about it? Or was Tobi the weird one for assuming so? He might just have been overthinking it. If he were to only look at the first part: “Would you like to spend some time with me?”, that time spent together would have taken on a special meaning. But he couldn’t simply ignore the second part. Shiratama clearly said, “on friendly terms.” Because of those words, he ought to interpret them as such.

Shiratama had just asked to be his friend, to keep it short.

But her selection of words was something else, being so formal with a classmate and all. There was no reason to dwell on it, though. Shiratama just wanted to be friends with Tobi. And that was the real problem.

Friendship with Otogiri Tobi?

What on Earth?

What’s more, there was a way bigger problem at hand. You could even call it crucial.

Shiratama Ryuuko could hear Baku’s voice.

The chapter continues in Part 2. Click me for part 2 redirect. Split due to Tumblr's 4096 Character limit posting.

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Fight Song animation setting images translation

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Extras that got posted afterward The main post is also edited with the images

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Fight Song animation setting images translation

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Translated, Typesetted by Elma from Q-talations

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How to Eat Life LN Chapter 1-1 Translation

#1 / Horizontal Falling Down

Oh, I kill so many beetles and insects every night. And now I’m to be killed by the hawk. So this is what it feels like. Oh, I can’t stand this. I’ll stop eating insects, and starve to death. No, Hawk will kill me before that happens.                                                                       ── Miyazawa Kenji, "The Nighthawk’s Star"

#1-1_otogiri_tobi / Why do flowers bloom?

“Otogiri...” The teacher with black glasses called him out in front of the gate. Otogiri Tobi only gave him a glare and passed by. The teacher groaned “Otogiri...” again. 

“That teacher sure is stubborn.” The backpack giggles.

“Well, that’s his job.” Tobi whispers in reply.

That teacher has given Tobi countless counsellings since the start of the school year. He’s not a homeroom teacher in Tobi’s classes nor does he teach in any of his classes, and Tobi has no idea of his name. 

“You can’t use this bag! Why are you wearing these boots? Your bangs are covering your eyebrows!” Baku mocks. “What are schools really for.. Are they trying to fit humans in the same containers?” Tobi walks into the school building, ignoring Baku. He changed his boots in the locker.

“Tobi, do you still remember? That teacher was always trying to get on your case about your hair every morning, so he... Well, it’s been over a year since-”

“I forgot.”

Tobi walked inside Class 3 of the 2nd year. He sits on the 3rd row beside the window. He placed Baku on the desk and sat down. Tobi then laid on Baku.

“Gonna sleep through classes? You sure are free, since you’ve got no one to talk to. Why not make a friend or two?

“Baku, shut up...”

“Hey watch yourself, Tobi, you’re gonna get recognized as a freak that always talks to himself.”

“I-” Tobi continues the sentence with the slightest voice he can possibly make. “......am not talking in a volume others will notice.”

“It’s not so bad letting them hear you, maybe that’ll make them wanna talk to you!”

“It’s just annoying.”

“Huuuh. You’re the type of person that thinks being antisocial and having no friends is cool?

“...No.”

“Yes. You definitely do. Tobi, you know what they call these types of people? Narcissists.”

“Sure sure, go on.”

“Consider it done, I get bored when zipped anyways.”

“.............”

“Just a heads up, If you think I’ll eventually shut up if you keep yourself silent, then you’re in the wrong!”

Baku continues to giggle.

“Never forget. I will never shut up as long as you’re alive. We’re in the same boat. We are one together.”

I won’t. Tobi counters in his mind. I will never forget it.

“...... Well, sometimes I do think about ‘What will happen if you get burned into ashes?’”

“Oi, I can hear you!”

“...You’re mishearing.”

“Well, I guess this is what happens without ears.”

“Huh...”

“So what exactly happened to my hearing?”

“I don’t know...”

“So cold. Such a coldhearted person you are. My heart is reaching subzero. I’m freezing.”

Then just freeze. Tobi whispered in his mind. It’d be adding fuel to the fire if I say it out loud. It’s best to ignore Baku’s jokes. I understand this the most. But I can’t resist reacting. I need more training.

“......Training for what?!”

 ○

Tobi is a fast eater. He empties the lunch plate in seconds....well, minutes. But he munches down everything but bread like he’s teleporting food into his stomach, then leaves the classroom in an instant with the bread. When there's no bread, he just leaves empty-handed. 

“Tobi, w-wait a moment!” The homeroom teacher tried to call after Tobi in the beginning, but now it seems like he’s used to being ignored. 

There’s bread today. And they’re butter rolls at that. 

Tobi carried Baku up and ran down the halls. 

“Tobi, you sure do like butter rolls, don’t you?” 

“What? I don’t-” 

“Liar. You walked too briskly, it’s obvious.” 

“It’s not like I dislike them, but I don’t really have many preferences...”

There’s no one in the halls. Everyone else is still having their meal. Knowing that, Tobi keeps his voice down.

“Tobiiii. You’ve always liked bread over rice right”

“It’s whatever...”

“You like fish over meat!”

“Seriously, whatever...”

“What about Kinako* and An*?” *Kinako is soybean flour and An is sweet bean paste. They’re often put in sweets in Asian/Japanese culture.

“An.”

“...Well, that was a rapid answer.

“I’m not good with powders.”

“I feel you. Wait, how could I possibly relate? What do you think I am? I am a backpack! I haven’t had any of them before!"

“I don’t know.......”

“You don’t have to say it like that. We’re partners right. right? .......What kind of partners are we?”

“That I genuinely don’t know.......”

“Bad company, we are. A rotten relationship we are in. Yup.”

“That might be correct.” 

“Why is our bond rotten? There must be a better way to call it!”

“You said it yourself.”

“Then correct me! Tell me I’m wrong! I’m lonely!”

”So you’re lonely......”

“Just a tiny bit.”

Tobi walked towards the courtyard. The sun is shining today. There’s a lawn, benches, and a garden and such, so it’s quite popular during recess. But no one else is here yet. Emptiness overflows in the yard.

“You’re gonna do it again, right?” Baku asks in a tone of dismay.

Tobi grabbed onto the exposed pipe on the school building walls. Or the pipe fittings, to be clear.

Stepping on pipes and grabbing on the grooves on the wall, Tobi climbed up to the roof.

“Jeez, You know what they say... Fools and smoke* like uhm... yeah.”  *Fools and smoke rise to high places is a Japanese idiom to ridicule fools.

Tobi doesn’t pay any mind to the teasing from Baku at all. He reached the roof of the 3-story building in a blink of an eye, “not bad” he feels. Today, he didn't miss a single step or lose his grip; it might have been his best run yet. Perfect even.

You can also reach the roof from the inside of the building, but the gates are locked. It’s probably locked to prevent danger and crimes.

Climbing is the only other way if you don’t have the keys.

There’s no one else than Tobi who'd go this far just to get on the roof. Tobi is the only one.

The rooftop is flat. It’s just concrete. There’s a low-rising wall around the edges. Pretty sure they’re called parapets.

Tobi placed the bag beside him and leaned on the parapets. He takes out the butter rolls from the plastic packaging. He took a bite with his eyes closed.

“How is it?”

“......It’s alright, just like every ordinary bread”

“Just say it’s delicious already. Stop lying to yourself.”

“Aahh, it's so yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy... simply delicious!”

“The way I say it makes it weird... probably shouldn’t repeat it so many times.”

“As I said, It’s just alright...”

“Hot dog buns or butter rolls?”

“Butter rolls-”

“See. Told’ya.”

“What, what are you gloating for...?

“Do I really need to explain?”

Tobi glanced at the sky after taking a few bites of the bun. He started looking at the schoolyard right after as he got bored immediately.

Tobi's school is U-shaped, and the courtyard sits in the hollow part. Tobi is sitting on the roof of the special classroom building, facing the homeroom building. The 3rd year's classrooms are on the 1st floor, the 2nd year on the 2nd floor, and so on and so forth.

Lunchtime ends with the chime ringing. Students begin to leave the classrooms as recess starts.

About a tenth or less of the students have weird creatures perched on their heads or shoulders from time to time.

Tobi doesn’t react to their existence when he sees them.

For instance, take a look at the group of 3 girls walking in the halls on the 2nd floor. Tobi can’t remember their name, but he’s pretty sure they’re in the same class. 

One of them, the girl in the middle, has a little bat, or a flying squirrel-like creature grabbing onto her back. 

There is a possibility that she is a fan of the weird creature so much she brings it to school,

 but it’s not the first time Tobi witnessed the creature. He also saw it in the classroom. Or rather, that creature is on her back at all times. 

But somehow, no one talks about it. Not the teacher nor the classmates. 

The girl doesn’t seem like she acknowledges the existence of that living thing on her back even. 

“Weird.” Tobi murmured.

“Wha?” Baku replies in an instant. “What exactly is weird?”

“It’s nothing really”

“It sure was something. You said something is weird. I HEARD it loud and clear. So. WHAT is weird?

“....... Well if you wanna know so badly, it’s you.”

“How am I weird?!”

“Are you not aware?”

“Hey, you!”

“eeeh-?”

Tobi looks down on the courtyard. It wasn’t Baku that shouted at him.

He spots a man in a jumpsuit. It’s the janitor of the school.

“.......Me?”

Tobi pointed at himself and the janitor shouted “Yeah you!”.

“Why would I shout at anyone else? You’re the only one up there!” 

“Uhh...... well, I guess.”

“You won't guess......!”

He looks younger than most teachers here. It may just be how he looks, but he is always smiling and looks needlessly affectionate. He always greets Tobi when he sees him, and Tobi always ignores him but he’s yet to stop.

“Hey, Otogiri, you do know that the rooftop is off-limits, right!? Actually, I've seen you up there a lot recently. How on Earth did you get up there!? The door is supposed to be locked! Just to be safe, I want to know if you happen to own a pair of spare keys?” 

“I don’t know about any spare keys”

“Right! You’re in big trouble if you copied a key or something on your own! Anyways, just get down here right this moment!”

“Shall I jump down?”

“W-WHAT!? N-NO! DEFINITELY NO! Ugh, I’ll come up there, you just wait for me! I have thousands of questions to ask you too, so just stay there!”

The janitor ran towards the building. He’s probably going to borrow a key from the office and get up here through the stairs. 

“Whatcha gonna do now Tobi?” Baku asks while trying his best not to laugh. 

“What am I gonna do?” Tobi picks up Baku. “I’m not waiting. It’s a hassle anyways.”

“Yeah right.”

“I kinda like it here.......”

Tobi walked across the parapets with a big sigh. It takes him just about a few seconds to climb down from the roof. Tobi is long gone by the time the janitor reaches the rooftop.

Tobi was called into the office after class by his homeroom teacher, Harimoto, who chewed him out. Tobi ignored practically everything Harimoto said, going in one ear and out the other, and understanding none of it. He didn't pay attention to the lecture.

“Otogiri, are you still listening?” Harimoto confirms with him every few minutes. Tobi only replied with “Yes”, and “I am” when he asks.

Harimoto usually wears a red tracksuit when there are no formal events. His short hair is set back and fixed with hair wax, just like a hedgehog*, with his name being Harimoto, so he gets called a hedgehog, or a friendlier nickname, “Harry” behind his back. *hedgehogs in Japanese are called Harinezumi.

“I don’t really want to be an annoying teacher, but you know, Otogiri, there are rules in society you have to obey. At least, at least──”

It was already half past four when they left the office.

“Tsk!” Baku blurted annoyingly. “That Harry bastard talks way too much. I got tired of being shut!”

“Don’t call him Harry...”

Tobi quickly walked out of the school. There’s nothing for Tobi to rush for, but he has a habit of not walking leisurely. He either walks with big steps or he walks fast. 

“Are you racewalking?”

Tobi slows down right before the gates after Baku’s roast.

“......this is mildly infuriating.”

“You’re always so impatient, how about you try and live a more relaxing life?”

“.......this is annoying.”

Tobi glanced at his watch. Takes about 15 minutes to reach the facility on foot. It closes in less than an hour. There are only about 40 minutes of free time thanks to Harimoto. Takes about 20 minutes by bus to get near where Tobi used to live.

“Tsk. Can’t make it today.”

Tobi, in a fit of pique, sees the school gate.

It’s a little less than two meters tall. It’s a cakewalk for Tobi to claw up, but he doesn’t feel like using his hands today. Tobi kicks the tiled gate and jumps on it.

“──yes!”

Tobi cheered for a bit subconsciously. He successfully climbed up the gates without hands as planned. He did it.

“Tobi... There are rules in society you have to obey~!” Baku quotes Harimoto mockingly. Tobi tried to talk back but forgot what he wanted to say.

There’s a girl on the other side of the gate. She stared at Tobi.

“Ah......”

She has a well-groomed face, shortens her long hair up with double buns, and is someone Tobi recognizes. 

Rather, she’s in the same grade as Tobi.

Surprisingly for Tobi, he remembers her name. It’s quite a distinctive name, so it stayed in his mind after seeing it once.

Her last name is Shiratama.

Her first name is also somewhat unique. “Dragon’s descendant”, read Ryuuko. 

Ryuuko seemed surprised as she blinked rapidly. 

Even Tobi is surprised. What is Shiratama doing here? There’s no one else near the gates. Tobi assumed everyone had already left. Didn’t expect to see someone. And it’s a girl from the same class, of all people. 

Tobi took a deep breath, with his lip pursed. 

What should I do? 

Baku zipped himself. Tobi felt deeply from his heart: This is the time you should say something like you always do...! A tease, boring chatters, unfunny jokes, please, anything. It’s not like Tobi is the only one that can hear Baku!

Why is Shiratama also keeping her mouth shut...

This is awkward.

It’s also the first time Tobi took a good look at her. Her clear facial features were always under his impression of her, but her facial features weren’t oddly huge. They weren’t strangely small either. It’s just amazingly well-shaped. Not a single snore. I feel like I can look at it all day without getting bored. Really goes to show how perfectly shaped she is.

Not necessarily because of that, but they stared at each other.

Tobi couldn’t look away, as she looked back at him.

He felt very embarrassed. Somehow he just couldn’t turn away.

What is this?

Why are we wasting time on this?

“Hey......!”

It was at this moment someone else shouted at them. It’s that janitor.

“Get off the gates! Wait, it’s you again Otogiri......!”

The anger of the janitor makes him look like a demon unleashed. Tobi looks at him. The janitor is swinging a broom.

“S-sorry.”

The janitor bursts into anger as Tobi apologizes. 

“Didn’t Harimoto just scold you?! Yet you don’t seem sorry at all!"

“I did apologize...”

Tobi jumped down from the gates. The janitor seemed ready to chase him, so he ran away immediately.

There wasn’t anyone on their tail when he looked back again, so he stopped running.

“That janitor sure is annoying......”

“You’re definitely on his watchlist now, heh.” Baku continues to giggle. Tobi gave him a stare. “Give me a break...”

“How about you tell him to give you a break?”

“How do I word that...”

“Right. For instance: Please forgive this pathetic, forsaken middle schooler, who is trying his best to become normal...! Not bad right?”

“I don’t think I’m pathetic...”

“Well, I do think a lone wolf is pretty pathetic, heh, it’s just a way of saying anyways~”

“But, I’m not alone, at all.”

“Huh?”

“I have a brother.”

When Tobi brings up his brother, Baku usually keeps his mouth shut. Baku never met his brother before. He met Tobi when they were already separated.

Tobi looks at his watch, it’s a quarter to five. As long as he gets back to the facility before 5:30, it should be fine, so he decided to take a little detour.

A detour for Tobi is nothing too fancy: he simply walks a little longer and a little further than he needs to. He tries his best not to spend money at all. He doesn’t have that much money to spend anyways.

The facility Tobi is in gives a middle schooler 3000¥ every month. He’s not sure if it’s a big amount or not. But it takes him 440¥ just to take a round-trip bus.

Money disappears in an instant. Tobi wants to save it for the right moment, so he is trying his best not to waste a single yen.

Because of this, Tobi has never been to a donut or fast food restaurant. He even avoids convenience stores because he fears being roped into wasting his money on useless items. 

He likes to walk. 

Baku is there to talk to when there are no people around them.

At the very least, he’s not bored.

“Well, I’m the one bored.”

Sometimes Baku says something as if he can read Tobi’s heart.

“I just get carried around by you anyways”

“Shall I throw you?”

“Do not throw me, even if it’s an accident.”

“It’ll be fun to fly.”

“Wait a second. Getting thrown is not flying at all. Your name means to fly* for god's sake! Look up a dictionary next time. Actually, look it up right now. It doesn’t say anything about getting thrown when you look up to fly!” *Tobi's name in Japanese literally means "to fly"

Tobi crossed from street to road. He ventures into streets he thinks he’s never been to before. But it seems like it was just another road he knew. Tobi has been all over the places near the school. There isn’t a street Tobi has yet been to.

The middle school Tobi is in is located in a town called Ourai, and the facility Tobi lives in is in the Asakawa town right beside it.

There’s a river called Asakawa in the town, as the name suggests. The river is wide and shallow except when it’s raining.

“For real though, Tobi... Don’t you think it’s a lazy name? They named this place Asakawa because there’s a ‘shallow river*’...” *Asakawa in Japanese means shallow river.

“It’s easy to recognize that way though.”

“You know... there’s something called ambiance...”

Tobi walked on the Asakawa river banks, carrying the backpack that wouldn’t shut up about the atmosphere.

There’s a “village” of tents on the lower path of the river bank. But there are not many camping tents, more like little huts made of recycled material. The Asakawa Den, as people call it. Den, hive, whatever suits the gathering.

The kids in Asakawa are taught to not go near this tent village.

Teachers from grade school, middle school, and even workers from the facility tell them it’s dangerous. Tobi has not been to The Asakawa Den before. He simply takes a view from above at best.

It doesn’t seem like a scary place anyways.

The people in The Asakawa Den are mostly made up of the lower class. Some aren’t even well-dressed. But there are still decent people.

Tobi once walked past this place at night, and he saw people in the den gathered upon a fireplace they set up. He isn’t sure how they live their lives, but he heard people talking happily. It seems like they were preparing meals together, and enjoyed their conversation as they ate. 

Tobi isn’t very good at dealing with people having a good time.

He likes to watch them from a distance, he just dislikes hanging out with them.

“Tobi, you sure are an introvert. Wouldn’t it be nice if you fix that?”

“It’s not like that...”

“Really?”

“I just get really tired when hanging out with people.”

“Humans are social animals, no matter if you get tired or whatever. It’s not possible to live all alone. You gotta learn to have a little patience.”

“Baku is being really serious...”

“I sure am a great backpack that can give proper advice when I feel like it!”

“Whatever you say...”

Asakawa River flows south. Tobi turned his back on the setting sun and walked across the bridge.

The sidewalk is empty compared to the crowded driveway. He climbed up the bridge walls in a heap.

“Not again, Tobi...”

Baku says in dismay. Tobi continues to walk on the walls.

He can feel the wind better up here. When Tobi sways around, Baku always exaggerates by making “uoooh...!” noises.

“I won’t fall over!”

“Sure. Don’t be as cocky as the King of Spades! Wait, do you even know the idiom?”

“I’m not that stupid... And I’m not being cocky at all...”

“You know? You’re taking it high as you get used to the height. It’s dangerous to get used to something. People that think they’re alright are exactly the people that always get into problems.”

“Why is Baku being this cautious...”

“Being cautious has been a part of me since I was born.”

“Since you were born...”

“What?”

“No, It’s nothing. I’m just wondering how you were born...”

“Huhh? Isn’t that y──……” Baku growled as he thought about it.  

Tobi vividly remembers the man. The one-eyed man with a top hat. That man placed the bag in front of Tobi. But Baku doesn't seem to understand what happened before he started talking.

Tobi stops and faces toward the river. As Tobi sat down on the parapet, he was struck by the feeling that both shoes were about to come off, having lost their place to step on.

“Hey, Tobi. You look like someone that’s about to jump.”

“I’m not gonna jump. It’s just a river down there, and I can swim anyways. “

“But, as the name Asakawa suggests, It’s a shallow river.”

“It’s fine.”

“Just be careful.”

“Yeah.”

Tobi shakes his body while he replies to Baku. Baku screams.

“Oooooooooii!!!” “I JUST said to be CAREFUL......!!!”

“Trust me, I’m not gonna fall.”

“Who knows?! That's exactly the kind of thing that catches you off guard!!!”

“I’m not being careless. I did it on purpose.”

“Oh. Purpose. On... purpose. Don’t do it on purpose. Don’t. Do. Not. Ever.”

“Didn’t expect you to use those words......”

“I ain’t faking it. That’s enough. Just stop being a jerk and let’s go home.”

“ehh......”

“Time’s almost up anyway.”

“You’re not wrong...”

“You don’t wanna go back there?”

Tobi avoided the question by pretending he didn’t hear Baku.

Baku giggles again.

“I understand it’s impossible to like that kind of facility.”

“I don’t feel anything about it...”

“Other people there call the facility "home" eventually for whatever reason, but you’ve never said that once. You never viewed the facility as your home, right, it’s impossible for you to think that way.”

Tobi shakes his legs. He was looking down with his back rounded when he knew it. He doesn't feel like stretching his back, and he can’t look forward or up even.

“It’s not the facility’s problem... It just──”

“Just?”

“It just doesn’t fit me at all.”

“Huh. What exactly doesn’t fit you?”

“People.”

“So, you don’t like people.”

“It’s not like I hate them...They just don’t fit me. As I said earlier.”

“You’re such a pain in the ass”

“Shut up”

“By the way,”

“Hm?”

“Did you notice?”

“Notice...?”

“Look.”

“Huh?  What?”

“Look at that place”

“Where?”

Tobi looked up.

Peeked left and right.

There’s someone within a meter of Tobi, of course, not on the walls, but there’s a girl standing right on the sidewalk.

The girl is in the same uniform as Tobi’s school. She has a well-groomed face and shortens her long hair up with double buns.

“.......Uh──”

Strange things happen.

Something like this happened before. ‘Before’, more like, an hour ago.

Shiratama Ryuuko stares at Tobi. She doesn’t mean to be wide-eyed, but her eyes look as if she’s trying to clutch Tobi firmly.

Tobi was once scolded by the teacher in the facility to look others in the eye when talking. He did exactly as the teacher said. But somehow the teacher stopped looking him in the eyes. The teacher started looking at his nose and mouth.

It's kinda awkward to look someone directly in the eye.

Tobi has read about cats disliking eye contact with humans from a book in the facility. An unkind stare is a sign of hostility, most of the time.

But Shiratama Ryuuko is only observing Tobi. Is the one called "Tobi" so unusual? She’s trying to find out more about what Tobi looks like, and what kind of ecology it has. It’s obvious from her gaze.

What is up with this person?

She was there back in school.

She’s here again.

Is it just a coincidence? Can't say it's totally impossible, but it sure is strange. Bizarre.

To be honest, it’s rather scary.

Tobi wants to run away. If he had not been sitting on the walls, he might’ve already started running without looking aside. That’s right. Let’s run. Just stand up and run, on the walls or not, just run. He can immediately escape if he wanted to. Why is Tobi not running away? He doesn’t get it either. Just like what happened back at the school gate. He somehow can’t move away from her eyes when Shiratama stares at him.

“Uh” As Tobi speaks, “Otogiri-kun” Shiratama also called his name.

“Y-yeah.”

Tobi unconsciously nodded.

“.......Eh?  What?”

“Do you, know about me?”

Shiratama asks Tobi while staring at him. She hasn’t blinked. Won’t her eyes get dry or hurt at all...He was irresistibly curious about such things.

“I... Kno──w about...... you.”You’re Shiratama-san, right? We’re in the same class...Shiratama, Ryuuko.”

“So you’re awake. The existence of mine.”

Shiratama finally blinked once or two.

Then she lifted her chin a bit, squinted both eyes, and raised both ends of her lips slightly.

“Whew, I thought you don’t have any interest in others.”

“Well, you’re not exactly wrong.”

“Sooo... you don’t?

She rolled her eyes and pursed her mouth this time. When her expression changed, it was like Shiratama became a whole other person, yet she was still herself.

“Then how did you know my name?”

“You see...... Your name is pretty special...”

“Yeah... Thanks to the name combination of Shiratama and Ryuuko, I get that a lot.” “But, Otogiri-kun has a name just as rare as mine, if not, rarer”

“I guess......Well──”

“Tobiiii”

Baku giggles yet again.

“And by rare, I mean, you talking to your friends at school is pretty rare, too, isn't it? heheheh.”

We’re not friends. Tobi was about to retort in a flash. But he knows Baku is purposely teasing him. And he can’t be angry at a backpack in front of Shiratama.

“Yeah, I know my name isn’t that common aswe──”

Tobi suddenly noticed something strange.

Shiratama isn’t looking at him. Tobi is looking at her, but Shiratama’s eyes are not on him. What is she looking at?

She’s staring at the backpack on Tobi’s left shoulder. Shiratama is staring at Baku.

“......Tobi, what now?”

Baku questioned in suspicion.

Tobi didn't reply, but instead repositioned Baku on his back, pulled him closer to his body, and held him close.

“It's, not a... common... name... I mean... uh...? hmm......? What's... what's wrong?”

Shiratama isn’t responding at all. She’s simply staring at Baku.

“Wha──”

Baku also began to fret.

“W-what is with this woman? It can’t be that......”

“You know?”

Shiratama started talking again, but she was still staring at Baku.

“I wanted to talk to Otogiri-kun so bad, so I waited for you”

“You...... waited”

Tobi failed to understand what she was talking about for a moment. Recalling it all over again, he understands now.

“Ah...... You’re talking about what happened back at the gates?”

“Yes!”

Shiratama nods without looking at Tobi.

“But, I just followed you after seeing Haizaki-san being angry and chasing after you.”

“.......Haizaki?”

“The Janitor of our school”

“So that’s his name. Haizaki......”

Haizaki-san never misses a chance to greet everyone, and is always available for a chat. He’s a very friendly guy.”

“Huh......”

It’s whatever to Tobi. His name, his personality. Whatever.

He’s more interested in why she waited for him. Why did she go all the way to follow Tobi? What is it that she wants to talk about? And she is still staring at Baku. He’s starting to care more about that.

“──So...... Shiratama-san, do you need something from me, or......?

It’s impossible to wait or follow me all the way here without wanting anything.”

Shiratama finally looked at Tobi instead of Baku and smiled.

Tobi fell flat on his face. He just couldn't help but look down. There’s nothing to look down on. Tobi glanced upwards and took a peek at Shiratama.

“Um,”

Shiratama raised her hand and pointed at something.

“So about that back-”

“.......eh──Baku......?”

“Ba ku”

Shiratama shook her head in reply.

“Back? Baku? It’s a duffle bag so...... B-A-G? Sooo, Bag is correct?”

“Uh...... ah, I’m not that good at, English.......”

Tobi started calling Baku his current name, all because Baku said he’s a Backpack.

It’s been a good while, and he can’t remember much detail. Pretty sure Tobi asked him ‘What are you’ and Baku replied ‘I’m Backpack’. Or it might’ve been, ‘I’m the great Backpack-sama’. Anyways, the word ‘Backpack’ is a bit too long and hard to pronounce, so Tobi just nicknamed him Baku in short.

“......It’s my Baku, no, uh──backpack......It’s my bag. So, uh.... is anything wrong with my backp- well, no, Baku....... ugh. Is anything wrong with my duffle bag......?”

“Otogiri-kun often talks with that bag right?”

“With my bag──”

Tobi almost fell down the bridge.

“W-w-with my bag? Me? T-t-talk-talks, huh? What? Why? I... don’t talk with him... that much.......?”

“Are you good at ventriloquy?”

Shiratama posed an odd question nonchalantly.

“Ventrilo...quy...”

Tobi tried out ventriloquism in spite.

Wait. It’s impossible. To be honest, this is crazy. Why is Tobi suddenly trying ventriloquism, which it’s something he’s never done before? He can’t do it anyways. It’s not something he needed to try doing right now.

“.......No, not at all. I’ve never done ventriloquism before.”

“So in that case, where is that voice talking to Otogiri-kun from ?”

“The...... voice──”

“Oi, Tobi...”

Baku whispers to him.

“Seems like she can hear me clearly. ...... She knows I'm talking to you.”

“THAT voice”

Shiratama nodded her head.

“Correct! I know you’re talking to him!”

Seriously? Tobi didn’t just think so.

“.......Seriously?”

He muttered out loud.

Shiratama stood straight, and her full-blown smile fills the entirety of her clear face as if she were decorated with colorful flowers.

“Seriously.”

Translated by Q-talations

Find us on other socials: https://linktr.ee/qtalations

[q-talations]

Eveの日, 2022 Afterparty translations

Streamed happened on December 24th, 2022, right after the live performance. (Stream comments, tweets, and Staff notes are bracketed like this.)

Ah- They can hear me now? A-a-a

Good evening~

Can you hear me?

Did everyone get here yet~?

I’m panicking a bit right now… haha

*cough*

I’m gonna drink some water.

That was rough~

wait a sec-

Can you all see this animation?

Ah, I see all the comments-

good evening everyone~

Seems like everyone has moved here now~

Merry Christmas Eve!

check this out, isn’t this animation so cute?

I asked Zem to make this for today’s event!

This is the first time I had a chance to hold an “afterparty”,

But the Livestream earlier was also the first attempt,

and to be honest, even though it’s called an after ”party”, it’s just going to be me talking… yeah

The live just ended a few minutes ago, how was it?

Eve Day Christmas Live, even though it was short, about 30 minutes…

I was also excited about how it would played out, I didn’t know many details beforehand, but I had the chance to perform in such an amazing studio… The band members are the same people I play with usually, and surprisingly I didn’t feel that nervous anymore right when I started singing… But my hands are still sweating a lot when I look back on it, haha

thank you, everyone, half an hour felt like a blink of an eye…

Everyone, we have the hashtag  #Eveの日, hope you can make some comments, about how you felt about the live or anything!

I’m going to read some comments on Twitter and youtube today, and discuss them.

The live was a solid 30 minutes with content.

-right don’t you feel like the camera angles are amazing?

I’ve talked to them a lot to catch the right angles to not show my face, *laugh* well yeah it’s also a part of the performance so they handled it elaborately…

(The hashtag is trending!)

Ohh! Nice! What’s the first on trend? Oh, the first is #Christmas, yeah… we can’t beat that hahaha

(Please say something in Spanish)

Well, please give me something to say in Spanish, any sentences?

I sang 6 tracks today, sang all the way through the 30 minutes of performance, and shortened the speech as much as possible to make it in time…

We uploaded the MV of Shirayuki, [White Snow] yesterday, and I also sang it today, so it’s the first time I played that song on stage -even though it was remotely broadcasted only-

(Thanks, from Indonesia!)

Thank you for coming as well – ‘español’ -

I placed a mirrorball in the middle for Don’t replay the boredom, that thing was shining bright- did you all feel it’s too bright? Through the screen? (It was okay)

Ao no Waltz is also trending? Nice

I sang: Tokyo Ghetto – Kaikaikitan – ao no waltz and kimi ni sekai today~

Please ask me anything or tell me anything through the hashtag!

So about today’s afterparty, it’s just going to be me sitting on a sofa and talking to you guys, and there was an “Ask Eve Anything” form opened before, and we’re going to randomly pick 2 people that submitted a question and gift them the Zingai Video Collection with my sign, so thank you, everyone, that asked me!

And there are lot of people that posted their comments on Twitter through the hashtag, we’re also picking 3 people out of them and I’m going to send them – you remember the Christmas merch we made? We’re sending 3 people the full pack with a sign too! We’re going to pick them out after the event is over, so please don’t be shy to send your comments now~

How was the live? – it just ended earlier and my brain isn’t properly working yet so I’m still a bit spaced out… haha

Isn’t it nice? I like the chill around here, feels like the oxygen isn’t pumping into my brain

Well live concert has its own advantages, but there are also things you can only do through remote live performances like it was snowing, and raining this time, some effects only achievable through broadcasting – we put the lyrics on screen also –, oh yeah and the lighting and scrims, all together to give a live band performance

I’ve never played in that kind of studio space, so I’m still in awe…

haha people in the comments are also talking about the visuals

(I’m curious about what you wore on your head)

Oh, that? I put a hairband on my head, my hair has gotten long, so I made it solid and won’t move around, ‘cause the cameraman worked hard on the angles and if my hair suddenly go off place he’s going to have a hard time trying his best not to capture my face, so I decided to put on a hairband… hahaha

Right, it’s for that reason

I’m reading some comments right now, and I’m happy everyone enjoyed it

(Thank you for kimi ni sekai…)

Yeah about this, I decided that kimi ni sekai had to be the finale, so I’m really happy about how it turned out

Back to the main topic, this year is about to end right, so I’m going to recap what I did this year, but before that, I’m gonna read some questions from the form and hashtag, is that okay?

Sorry, it’s now just a time where I talk about whatever I want-

Woah there’s a lot- there’s 50? 3? 50 million?! Oh, 1500… Thought I got 50 million questions haha, staff picked about 50 for me, so let’s jump right into it

(What Christmas gift did you wish for when you were a child?)

- Pokemon, I think it was Pokemon G/S – when I was a child, around early December, I write down what I want and stick the notes on the fridge, … I think

(What’s your top 3 favorite food of this year?)

- Nattou, Shrimp, Chocolate

(What was the happiest moment you had or your favorite moment of this year?)

I really enjoyed the Budokan Live concert, as well as the live one I performed today. I’ll cherish these memories

(What do you usually eat as a celebration for yourself?)

So many questions about food today – hmmm, I probably will eat something sweet, but I haven’t eaten anything like a cake today, now that you mention it I want some cake

(What are some things you bought that felt like a good purchase this year?)

hmmm, what should it be… well, I didn’t buy much

(What song you made this year took the longest/you think is full of memories?)

To be honest, I didn’t make many songs this year… the Shirayuki MV we uploaded yesterday and the Bouto MV has a gap of about 6 months? So yeah I didn’t write as many songs this year, even though I’m still writing a few songs at the moment, the song that stuck with me would be Fight Song, but you all haven’t heard it yet… haha

(How did you feel when you got contacted to write for the last ending song of Chainsawman?)

how did I feel… csm is on air right now, so about 3 days? Today is Saturday(December 25th, 2022), so yeah the final episode, ep12 is going to be out in a few days, and I didn’t show up in the previous 11 episodes, you know what it means everyone? I’m guaranteed to show up next episode haha, let’s watch it together. Just this once, because I’m confirmed to show up, so let's all watch csm when it airs! Surely I didn’t tell anyone, well all of the artists that worked for chainsawman didn’t tell anyone as well, so it really became us teasing the fans… haha, but finally, Fight Song will be out next week!

(How will you spend your New Year after CDJ*? I really look forward to the event as you will be performing in it!) *CountDown Japan Festival is a new years event in japan involving a big number of music artists performing on stage counting down the last days of 2022.

Yea everyone, I will be at work for the last days of the year, working for providing music in CDJ Fes, and it’s the first time ill be in a music Fes, I’m performing on the 29th! If you’re attending CDJ, please come and see me! And after CDJ I will be eating a lot of Soba noodles and chilling in my house for the rest of the days hehe

(What merch is your favorite of all the Christmas merch you made?)

Hmm, what is it? It’ll probably be the smartphone strap, I use it all the time too

(You gave a lot of new things a try this year, what are some things you want to do next year, or in the visible future?)

Hmm, well yeah we could do more live concerts now, so I want to try more of that in the future.

(What do you do when you’re very angry?)

I… don’t know if I get angry that often, if not at all… I think I’ve stopped being angry at all, maybe I’ve been easily angered when I was younger but recently I’ve never really been angry.

there really are a LOT of food-related questions hahaha

(All of your songs are really charming, and I think it’s hard to make a setlist for each live performance and concert, how do you decide for them?)

Take the live performance this time, for instance, I’m also attending the Fes next week, plus I wanted to make both of them sound unique, so I tried my best to take the balance in both of them, like this time’s performance being something everyone can watch, and I expect people to relax and chill with the live I put up in their homes, so I went with that main goal and picked the songs for today.

(How do you pick the clothes for a live concert?)

I choose by how comfortable it is to wear, I’ve actually put on a lot of clothes I’d wear at home for lives recently haha

(What zingai would you pick to be with you for Christmas?)

The tiny chill ones are my picks ehehe

ooh there are really a lot of questions, thanks everyone, let’s read some tweets as well

(I enjoyed Shirayuki!)

thanks~

Yeah shirayuki MV was uploaded yesterday, the animations are really good, and the Director is Fujita, even though the animation studio is made by CloverWorks. Director Fujita Haruka, directed works like Violet Evergarden spin-off, - I really love his works – and like Hyouka – a good amount of works from KyoAni, and they’re all something I’ve enjoyed when I was still a student, so it’s really an honor to work with him this time, and I was really happy. If you watch the animations for the MV, you can see the artwork is really beautiful and elegant. I hope you could watch it a lot. The characters are designed by Takase Maru – he did the cover jacket for Shirayuki single as well – the characters are all very charming, yup, it’s not “shirayuki-chan”, the person in white is a boy, - hope you can watch the MV a lot - yeah I watched a lot of KyoAni works, loved Hyouka.

ooh, there are really a lot of people from overseas! Let’s read some tweets now

(I heard you played baseball before, what defensive position did you play for?)

I think I was an outfielder. Not really sure, or probably an left fielder

(Shirayuki MV felt like a mini-movie)

(I went to see Black Night Parade!)

Niiice! Please go and see BNP too! Thanks!

(Where will you play in the next live concert?)

I’m going to attend a fes next week, which is the only concert I have decided to attend for now.

(What toothpaste do you use?)

…hahaha, What is it? Well it’s not like I have preferences, but I have sensitive teeth, so I choose ones that aren’t cool, ones that don’t hurt my teeth

(Any manga/anime or anything you’re addicted to right now?)

guys, please tell me some manga/anime suggestions, people from overseas are welcome too, just tell me some titles for me to watch -

(this stream is so chill) hahaha yeah, it's just what it is – though it’s called an Afterparty, sounds cool right, but in reality, it’s just me chilling and talking, sorry if people from the live expected something more

- ooh there are a lot of suggestions, everyone watching different titles,

(the snow dome [from the live] was so cute) yeah, it felt really Christmasy!

Oh yeah Bocchi the Rock, I wanna watch that, the title interests me

so many – Blue Lock – sooooo chill right, sorry everyone the conversation derailed a lot. - Yeah Kiyoneko is amazing! – I made a song for the animation Kiyoneko, it’s called Uchouten Neko, you can easily find the anime on youtube if you type the name out so please give it a listen – ahh I feel a lot less nervous now, at first I was worried about how the live went, but surprisingly I’m not nervous anymore now, and yeah, I talk on live streams around this time every year, so I’m happy I could do something different – like a live performance this time, and I was worried if I would mess things up, so I was really nervous –

Yes I like blue a lot, the color is nice~

*translator note: he really derailed a LOT, this transcription is about exactly how it played out its like 5 conversations held at once LOL, if you’re wondering why he talks like this its likely because he reacts to comments at the same time

Okay, I talked a lot while reading some tweets, but let's move on to the next section

- Path of 2022 -

my staff prepared a recap list of what I did this year, let’s read it together – you all figured? I was being very nervous, you guys felt like a Mom and worried that Eve will accidentally show his face, sorry if I made you worry haha

(I loved Ao no Waltz, thanks!)

Oh yeah I performed Ao no Waltz in the Budokan concert for the first time, and it was an orchestra arrangement with an orchestra team, it was extraordinary.

(the phone scene at the start was crazy) Yeah it was, my heart was pumping I’m never doing that again hahaha, but if I have to say something, I actually rehearsed a lot for that one scene, I confirmed how to walk with the camera, where to put it, etc… I practiced for it, I 100% couldn’t do it without any practice.

(I was about to cover up the screen hahaha) what you’re covering up the screen with your hand? You could still see it though hahaha

back to the topic, yes, the path of 2022.

Let’s see… ooh, on January 1st, Kaikaikitan reached 200 million listens on streaming services! Woaaaah, thanks everyone, oh yeah I asked the staff for the current number from the staff, and they told me it’s at around 550 million right now, including fans overseas, thanks for all the support, isn’t it crazy?

right after that, on March 8th, Avant is exclusively released onto streaming services,

Avant is a song I wrote for the mobile game of Jujutsu Kaisen, and the live MV version is included in the Zingai Video Collection I released earlier this month, hope you can watch it!

March 15th, the Music Movie, Adam by Eve is released on Netflix – that was something that happened this year? I felt like it happened long ago… seems like it was something I did in 2022. It was also released in local theaters for a week or two, and I went to see it with the Director, yes the Director of Bouto, there were a lot of people, and no one figured out we were also there, to be honest, someone there looked like me more than I did, yeah, we watched the movie together with everyone else.

The next day, March 16th, the album Kaizin is released, oh that was also this year? I released an album this year.

I went on a countrywide live concert tour from April to May, not just in Toyko/Nagoya/Osaka, I also went to places like Sendai, Ishikawa, Hiroshima, etc… really performed in a good amount of places. I think a lot of people also experienced their first live concert through this tour.

Up next, Bubble ft. Uta was released on April 21st. Ohh this was also in 2022! This was the first new song after the Kaizin album, these all felt like something happened years ago…

Right after May 23rd, the Kobe tour, the Budokan live concert announcement dropped. It happened on August 29th/30th, time flies, already 4 months past that… Yes, I performed a 2-day concert in the Japan Budoukan. And the live video collection of that concert has been released recently (Dec 13th), and it felt like it all happened suddenly.

we then warp to December in a sudden, the movie Black Night Parade, and the main song for the movie, Shirayuki has also been released yesterday. Please go and watch the film and enjoy the music at the theater if you’re interested!

after that, the ending song for Chainsawman, Fight Song will be released. Well, it’s not out right now, but you’ll soon hear it next week. This is going to be the last of me this year, so let's all… listen to it together. Yeah, let’s all do that. I’m sure there are also people that haven’t watched Chainsawman, but Fight Song was a song that stuck with me the most this year personally even though 2022 is ending, so I hope we all can listen to it together and wait for the arrival of 2023!

To think back, somehow a lot really has happened this year – like how I prepared a lot for this live performance – the soba noodle eating all is left haha, thanks for all the support from overseas, Korea/Indonesia/Spain/America/etc, thank you all, really.

Anyways, thanks for all the comments and tweets today, I’m going to read all of them when this afterparty ends, so I hope you all can show me your thoughts on my music, the visuals, and anything. I’m going to pick a few people out of them and send you the Christmas merch, so feel free to talk about anything!

Is there anything I forgot to read? Don’t think so- oh the staff handed me something wait – oh yeah, I released cards for a card game, yes the zingai card game, even though it’s nothing related to music, please search for it if you’re interested!

The afterparty stream is planned to last around 30 minutes, but we’ve talked a bit too much for now so I think I’ll wrap this up here! Ah! The afterparty stream will be available until the 31st! oh, only the afterparty. This chill talking stream will be viewable for the rest of the year, I doubt anyone would watch it again, but people that missed it, joined late, or had to drop off early, can still access it later!

the people that got picked for the merch will be DM’d by the eve official account, so don’t forget to leave your DMs open! That’s all for this Eve Day Youtube Premium Afterparty stream-

(CALL KIYO*?)

*Kiyo is a Popular Japanese Gaming YouTuber, a very good friend of Eve

wait wait wait guys, he’s also a busy person okay? It’s even Christmas Eve today! You guys have to learn to care about others hahaha, they all have plans for Christmas! Some plans in private, so… yeah! right?!

- to explain to people that don’t know, Kiyo is my friend. And I suddenly called him on the Eve day stream last year, what was he doing then…? I think he was editing his video, pretty sure. It seemed really boring so I’d expect him to do something else, like something special this year! Enjoying his life! I think…

(what if he’s also editing videos this year?)

Ehh? Really? I don’t think so~ Should we call him? I hope he doesn’t get angry at me haha. Okay if he doesn’t answer, it’s exactly like what I said, okay everyone? I’m only calling him once!

*Eve calls Kiyo through Line*

I think he’s not gonna answer~

Kiyo: Yeah?

Eve: hello? What’re you doing right now?

Kiyo: I’m editing.

Eve: HAHAHAHAHAAHAAH

Kiyo: Didn’t I tell you this morning? I’m video editing today!

Eve: really?

Kiyo: This moment right now to me is useless!

Eve: It’s Christmas Eve today!

Both: HAHAHAAHAA

Eve: Isn’t it Christmas Eve today?

Kiyo: Yeah right. I didn’t want to edit videos today too!!!

Eve: AHAHAHAHAHAHA

Kiyo: I edited videos all day today!

Eve: So you were video editing all day?

Kiyo: Yeah, and guess what, I was about to upload! Right this moment!

Eve: HAAHHAAHAHAHAH

Eve: I see… well you see everyone in the comments was asking about you… they all thought you were video editing

Kiyo: So, I’m actually free? Got a lot of time?

Eve: AHHAAHAH, maybe that’s right

Kiyo: Wait wait, can I tell them?

Eve: Uh okay sure, what are you telling them

Kiyo: I’m going to tell everyone what Eve is going to do right after this stream ends

Eve: yeah yeah. sure. tell them.

Kiyo: Well, It’s also going to be me as well after finishing up the video,

Eve: yeah

Kiyo: We both have absolutely zero plans for the night so we’re going to take a walk outside.

Eve: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

Eve: so lonellyyyyyyyy, hey but I did a live earlier!

Kiyo: HAHAAHAHAH

Eve: This suddenly felt really lonely I’m just gonna hang up

Kiyo: WHY ARE YOU CALLING ME THEN WHEN WE’RE MEETING UP IN A MINUTE!!

Eve: AHAHAHAH, right right sorry, then please finish up the video soon

Kiyo: I CAN’T FINISH UP THANKS TO THIS PHONECALL!

Eve: We’re finishing up on my hand

Kiyo: JUST HANG UP ALREADY

*phone call ends*

Eve: haahahahahahahahhahaah

so yeah he’s always called to wrap up the scene every time, let's all thank him hehehehehe... Yeah I'm going for a walk, even tho I just had a live Everyone, don’t catch a cold, warm yourself up and go grab a cake or something

I suddenly feel down now hahaha, let’s end here~ thanks all for attending the live!

Good Night! Merry Christmas! 

Translated by Elma from Q-talations find Q-talations on other socials: https://linktr.ee/qtalations

[q-talations]

How to Eat Life LN Chapter 0 Translation

#0/ Past t(h)e=. horizon 

kako w(h)a dot kanata

With a little push, he grabbed the iron bars with his right hand and did a kick over with his left foot up the bars. Otogiri Tobi stands on the bars, arms crossed. 

“Hey, Tobi…” The backpack on his shoulders giggles. “Just to be clear, but what you just did there is a bit weird, okay? You look like a lunatic.” 

Pretending not to hear the bag, Tobi scouts around the tiny kid’s park. Monkey bars. Slides. Two planted trees. Two benches. A water fountain. Road lights. A swing set for two. 

Two kids are sitting on the swing. Younger than Tobi, about fifth or sixth grade. They both put up a face as if trying to say, “What is that middle-schooler doing? Jeez.” 

“Told ya. Heh heh heh.” The snickering of the backpack stands out. 

Tobi clicks his tongue. “Shut up, Baku.” He counters in his mind.

He does not say it out loud. 

Those kids can’t hear Baku. Tobi is the only one that can communicate with this backpack. 

He jumps down from the bars. 

“You got nothing but a nimble body, exactly like a monkey!” 

Ignoring Baku’s non-stop teasing, Tobi climbed up the slides.

The kids on the swings lost interest in him and started playing with their phones. He leans forward on top of the slide—he used to be around this height back then. The slide is made of metal, making the numerous dents in it quite visible.

The yellow paint on the handle is peeling off. 

“Is this the place??” Baku whispers. 

“I wonder.” Tobi whispers back, pulling up his left sleeve. 

The screen of his watch bought from the pawn shop displays 4:59 PM. Tobi, a second-year middle school student, is not in any club, and he doesn’t go to cram school either. 

The facility closes at 5:30. 

“Won’t you run late if you don’t get back now?” Baku giggles as he speaks. 

Shut up, Tobi thinks and jumps down the slide. His shadow looks profusely longer with the backpack on him. 

The chime started ringing. It’s “Yuuyake Koyake”*.

*”Yuuyake Koyake” is a Japanese nursery rhyme.

A familiar melody. A tune we’re used to. 

Tobi gazes into the twilight sky. “...Piggyback.” 

“Huh? What?” The confused Baku is left questioning, and Tobi repeats his words.

“Piggyback—” 

○

That’s right, a piggyback. 

Tobi’s brother whispered a song while giving him a piggyback ride to the park.

“Hey, what’s that song you’re humming?” 

He tried to avoid Tobi’s question by giggling. 

“What’s that song~? Tell me!” Tobi begged while gently pinching his ears. “Come on! Tell me, what song is that?” 

“I just made it.” 

“You just did?” 

“Yeah. I just made that song up right now.” 

I remember very clearly. I’m reminded of it from time to time.

The slide. Tobi played on that slide countless times. 

His brother watched over him from the bench.

With his legs crossed, he squints. A smile appears on his face.

 They played on the swing, also.

The swing is for two, so his brother would swing next to him.

“…Wait.” 

(Not “to” the park.  He would give me piggyback rides when we “went back home.”) 

He carried Tobi on his back when he’d get tired after playing in the park. On the road back home with the chimes of “Yuuyake Koyake,” he hummed a different song.  

○

"Tobi.” 

Baku calls for him.  “Hey, Tobi.”  

Tobi walked out of the park without replying. 

There’s a two-story house in front of them.  

He tries to remember the route they took that day. 

Did we turn right, or turn left? Shit. I don’t remember a single detail. 

For now, he decides to turn right.

It was a small path, so narrow that you’d almost bump into the cars passing by. All the houses, with their faces to the path, look aged, and some even look ancient.

They see a barber shop, the barber's pole striped red, blue, and white in a helix. The walls are green, and the shop's name is Hatsushima.

It almost sounds familiar.

“What about here?” Baku asks. Tobi shakes his head and keeps walking.

He’s looking for an apartment building. 

Though unsure of where it exactly is, Tobi is pretty sure it's around this block. White-ish walls, a two-story apartment with exterior hallways and stairs. He lived on the 2nd floor with his brother back then. 

Tobi can’t remember exactly which room it was. He’s pretty sure it was on the corner, and he remembers what the interior looked like. 

Railings painted in black were installed onto the balcony.  

His brother always put him on the fence bars as he smoked.  The scene is deeply imprinted in his mind. 

He stands still in the middle of a crossroad. There’s a sewer hole directly below him. No matter how hard he tries to remember, the scenery feels unfamiliar. But, having been about 8 or 9 years since then, it’s not unusual for things to have changed.

“And what about here, Tobi?” Baku follows up. 

“You’re” —Tobi tries to hold back— “very annoying! Shut up!” He blew up, unable to restrain his anger. 

“...You don’t gotta get angry about it. My bad” Apologizing isn’t Baku’s style either.  

Tobi sighs as he turns back. It was at this moment that the old, black concrete wall caught his eye. 

There’s a little corner behind the walls. Dirty concrete walls. Corner. Weird. 

Tobi walked towards the corner. It bugs him for some reason. There’s a narrow lane beside it.  

One-story and two-story houses cram together on both sides. Houseplants line the curb; the utility poles are extra thin, and the wires sticking out almost cover up the sky. 

Then all of a sudden, Tobi’s heart throbs.

“I was here before……” 

○

Tobi ran through this alley that day. 

He was not alone. His brother was there too. 

He was dragged by his brother. They were in a hurry. They were being chased. Someone was chasing them. They ran. 

Why? Why are we being chased? Did we even have time to think?

He wonders. He can’t remember.

(What exactly happened? Did my brother explain? Did he even understand the situation in the first place? He doesn’t know. All I remember is we ran for our lives. That I am certain of.)

○

(It was getting dark. There were no other signs of life around us. Pretty sure it wasn’t entirely dark. Probably around sunrise. Or possibly sunset.)

The path connects to a slightly wider road. There are a few shops with overhangs on the right. They probably ran this way. 

It must’ve been painful. Tobi wasn’t running right now, but he felt the pain. 

He’s certain he whined a lot. 

I can’t. I need to rest. I can’t run anymore. Run without me. 

His brother must have cheered him on.

“Tobi. You can do it.” 

That’s right. 

I still got this. 

I have to run.

Can’t give up when my brother still hasn’t. 

○

The asphalt road gives way to a cobbled path. It’s an old shopping street. 

The shutter gates are all closed. 

I don’t remember this place. Did we take a wrong turn? 

Wait. 

We passed through the alleyway quickly. 

“It was here, wasn’t it, Tobi?” Baku tries to confirm with him. 

Tobi remains silent. 

It was here. I’m sure. Am I? We’re...downtown? Nothing stands out. It’s yet another common street. 

Was it really here? 

○

Tobi’s brother finally started carrying him.  

He might have started crying. 

He fell, and he couldn’t get back up. 

(That’s right. 

This is the exact place where I fell.) 

Tobi’s brother carried him up and kept running. “It’s all right!” 

His brother’s voice comes back to him. 

They could hear cars.

“Shit!” 

As his brother caught sight of the red lights, he cursed, and it seemed like the two of them turned back.

(It wasn’t just one or two that were chasing us. There was a ton.) 

“Stop.” 

(We were commanded by a man's voice. )

○

It didn’t happen right now, it’s what happened then. But Tobi still felt like a deer in headlights when reminded.

It’s unsettling how clearly I remember how it felt. 

○

Tobi held onto his brother and closed his eyes. 

The shout of the man shocked Tobi, and he opened his eyes in fear. The man stood in front of them. He had something in his hands. He pointed it their way. A loud bang echoed through the street. It was a great noise. 

(I couldn’t understand what the noise was back then. To think of it now, it was a gunshot.) 

The man had a gun. 

He shot at them. 

His brother staggered. 

At the time, he couldn’t imagine his brother would be shot.

But he was certain something happened to his brother. That was the only thing he understood. 

But his brother kept running while carrying him. He was limping heavily; it was obvious he was injured. It must’ve hurt a lot. 

How long have we been running since? It was longer than a few minutes. 20? Or 30 minutes? Even hours? 

His brother ran into a narrow alleyway between buildings. He set Tobi down. Maybe it was Tobi who asked to be put down.

In any case, Tobi was on foot, holding his hand. 

It was a damp, dirty place, and it smelled bad. There were countless outdoor units of AC above them, making noise. 

Tobi’s brother opened a door and pushed him inside.

“Hide right here.” 

“But...” 

“Keep quiet until I call you again. Got it? Promise me. Don’t make a sound.” 

His brother returned to the alley with Tobi hiding indoors. 

He tried to close the doors and Tobi was in great fear. 

I’ll be alone if I do as he says...No...I don’t wanna be alone...I wanna be with my brother... I don’t wanna leave him behind... But he is badly injured. It must hurt a lot, and I’m sure my brother is at his limit. 

I can’t do this. 

Tobi was dragging his brother down. 

I’m just a burden. I wanna be with my brother. I don’t wanna be alone. But I have to listen to what he says. 

“I-” 

Tobi opened his mouth to speak, but his brother put his fingers on his lips. “Shhhh...”

He couldn’t see his brother very well. In fact, he couldn’t see him at all. But somehow he felt like his brother smiled. 

Tobi nodded and kept his mouth shut. 

His brother closed the doors. It became dark. 

Tobi vividly remembers the darkness.. It wasn’t just “dark”. It felt like if he reached out he’d touch the shadows. 

The darkness was heavy. 

It was not because of the environment that Tobi couldn’t see. The potent darkness blinded him. It covered up his eyes, his ears, his nose, and his mouth.  

He was suffocating. 

The darkness leaked inside him. 

Tobi stuck his ear on the door, as he was losing consciousness. He could still hear the AC units making noise. The noise calmed him down as he was assured his ears weren’t fully covered. Soon after, he heard something else. 

Were they footsteps? 

A sound, like a big bang. 

Voices followed after. 

Someone was shouting.

Was it my brother? Or was it someone else?

Tobi desperately wanted to get out. 

He held the doorknob. He thought about going out countless times, but he never opened the door. 

Hide right here. 

The exact promise he made with his brother. He agreed to it. He refused to break that promise. He simply could not.

But, I’m scared. 

(All I could do was stay dead silent.) 

He crouched in the darkness, simply waiting for his brother. 

He will return. “It’s all right now, Tobi!” That’s what he’ll say. All Tobi did was trust his brother. That was all he could do. 

The room he was in was an entrance room with a staircase. It led somewhere downstairs. It might’ve led to the depths of the world. 

The bottom of Earth. 

He felt like something moved in the darkness from time to time. He wanted to scream so badly whenever that happened. He tried his best to keep himself quiet, and called for his brother in his heart. 

Onii-chan. *

Onii-chan. 

Onii-chan. 

Onii-chan, help me. 

Onii-chan, come back to me. 

Onii-chan, please be fast. 

Onii-chan, please. Please. Please come back. 

Onii-chan. 

Onii-chan. 

Onii-chan. 

I’m right here. 

I promised you. 

I’ll do whatever you say. 

Onii-chan...! 

*"Onii-chan" means "brother" in Japanese.

○

Tobi had no idea how long he'd been waiting for his brother. 

Shaking in fear, hiding in the darkness, minutes became hours. It’s been 3 hours... 4 hours even? 10 hours? More? Half a day? A whole day? Had it been 2 days? Or had it been even longer? 

“.........” 

The door suddenly opened, and light poured in. The light was dazzling. His eyes hurt for a second, but that did not stop him in any way. “Onii-chan!” 

Tobi ran up the stairs. 

The doors were open. 

He ran out. 

The strong odor still remained. The alley was paved with concrete. Shades of red stains leaked from cracks of concrete. 

It was blood. 

He thought. He wondered whose blood it was. It couldn’t be. 

No way it’s my brother’s. 

It couldn't be. 

Tobi sat on the staircase in the darkness. He was alone. 

Someone opened the door. 

Who was it?

“Onii-chan.” 

That’s right. It was him. My brother opened the door. There’s no way it wasn’t  him. My brother returned for me. He is here to pick me up. He came here to find me. He should be around. The one that opened the door, my brother, must be around. 

“Onii-.......” 

There he was. 

A man stood in the exit of the alleyway. 

Wait. 

Tobi shivered. 

That was not— 

That. Was. Not his brother. 

The man leaned toward Tobi. 

He was tall and he wore a hat. Tobi didn’t know what exactly the type of hat was. To think of it, it should’ve been a top hat. 

The man wore a long black coat with a scarf. The problem was his face. 

Eye. 

He only had a single eye. 

There was only an eye on his face. 

One single eye. (Hitotsume) 

That was the man’s face. Not even an eyeball. It was just a single eye. 

If Tobi remembered correctly, the man with one eye blinked. He does have eyelids in that case.

The man carried something, which seemed like a bag, on his shoulders. It didn't seem like he carried anything else. 

Tobi couldn’t spot a gun, at least. He wasn't one of the people that chased Tobi and his brother. It seemed they weren't related. 

In any case, he only had one eye. In other words, this creature might have been way more dangerous and unknown. He had a single eye, after all. 

The man handed the bag over to Tobi as if he’s telling him to take it. Tobi shook his head. For one, a man with a single eye is suspicious, and the bag wasn't Tobi’s anyway. Tobi just can not take something like “that”.

The one-eyed man eventually leaned down. He placed the bag on the ground. 

A bag. 

He was pretty sure it was a bag. There was a strap which one could use to carry it. 

It was a big bag. 

Tobi stared at it for a while. 

By the time Tobi looked back up, he realized the one-eyed man was gone. Nowhere to be seen. Gone. It felt as if the man was never here to begin with.

But, certainly, he was here. 

The proof was right there. 

The bag remained. It was the thing the one eyed man had placed here. 

“It’s all his fault...” 

Tobi suddenly wanted to cry. It was all his fault. It was all the one-eyed man’s fault. Tobi couldn’t keep his promise to his brother because he opened the door. 

I should’ve waited until my brother called me...! 

Because of that man, Tobi broke his promise to his brother. 

Tobi was always a crybaby. He always cried even though it wasn’t a big deal. His brother always hugged him when Tobi cried. 

His brother never stopped him from crying. “Tobi, cry all you want. Cry until you feel better.” 

Remembering those words, Tobi’s tears stopped. Tobi has not shed a single tear ever since. 

He eventually reached out for the bag with hesitation. 

It was surprisingly light despite its size. Even the five-year-old Tobi could easily carry the bag over his left shoulder, just as the one-eyed man had. 

Suddenly, he didn't feel so alone anymore.

○

The blood stains continued outside the alley. 

“My brother is injured.” Tobi was certain. 

The blood stains were from his brother. His brother tried to escape from the people on his own. He must’ve planned to return when he confirmed it was safe, but something happened and he failed to return. 

If that is the case, I’ll be the one to find my brother. 

“I have to look for him.”

Translated by Q-talations

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